SPARC Forums

We we went to court last summer to modify the c/s.  The mother has a nanny watch her 2 smaller children but she told the judge that she also pays $250.00 for bd who at the time was 1 month shy from being 13.  The judge believed her and raised hubby's support an extra $100.00.   Bd is with the nanny 1 hr after school 3 days a week.   Bd was here duing her Christmas break and mentioned that she has been left home for a couple of hours to watch her younger brothers.  I do not think it is bd's job to watch her brothers,  but hubby should not have to continue to pay daycare expenses because the mother has hired a nanny for her 2 smaller children.  Bd will be 14 this year she is well capable of being left home by herself which she has been.  The problem is I think the judges find any excuse they can to keep the support amount as high as they can and if bm says that she pays daycare for an almost 14 year old I'm afraid the judge will use it and make us pay.  What can we do to show the judge that my husband can not afford nanny expenses that the nanny is there for the 2 smaller children and had there been no younger children there would be no nanny.   Hubby is in construction and for the past 3 years work has been slow he has made $10,000 less than what his hourly income says he will gross in a year but the courts do not seem to care they just attribute him to his hourly income.  He is unemployed right now and has been for the past 4 months he did have a 2 week job during that time ( they are called short calls).  If we could knock of the daycare expenses it would help out emensley.  As it stand now we are getting further an further in arrears and the interest is making it go up.

Have your attorney deposition the housekeeper.  Find out who she was "actually hired" to care for, the hours she is there, what she does for the children, all 3 of them, the hours she says she watches the older child, and her salary.  Then you have info to show the judge that 1. The actual costs for child #1 is 10% of the amount charged for the nanny.  You have to have the proof on paper to make this idiot judge see the light.  I would also check with the local child services organization in the area biomom lives and ask at what age they feel it is appropriate for a responsible child to be left alone.  Get it in writing (my guess is that they will say 12 or 13).  Thus, no reason for a 14 year old to have a nanny, and get school records to prove that child is responsible child. (not getting in trouble at school, grades, etc).  Your proof in writing.  Takes a little work on your part, not to mention a little cash for the deposition, but apparently well worth it.

Whether or not it is bd's responsibility to watch the younger siblings is not your choice, nor should it be brought up.  There is nothing wrong with a teenager watching siblings for short periods of time.  

If you live close enough, or have other relatives that live close enough to child, suggest that the child go to your home or relatives home after school to help defray the costs.  

Good luck, let us know what happens!