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State Message Forums => Minnesota State Forum => Topic started by: spinner on Dec 17, 2005, 08:50:14 PM

Title: School, new CS law, .... long storry, need your advise
Post by: spinner on Dec 17, 2005, 08:50:14 PM
This is a long storry and I am not sure where to start.

I am the dad of a little boy. My ex and I just finished mediation and agreed to change parenting time times, and this and that, the bottom line is I have every other week-ends and 1 night a week and a lot of extra time there and there, ... bottom line is I have my kid between 46% and 50%.

My ex and I have a really bad history but now we are communicating. Well she calls me to take my kid extra time.

there is an imersion school in my school district and I would like our child to go to it. This is important as My kid and I have dual citizenship and that school teaches our 2nd language, ... anyway, this is one really important piece for me.
My ex isn't opposed to it too much, her main concern is child support.

So here we are at the question, with the new child support laws, I have a good case to use the 50/50 time calculation.
Being that our kid is gona be in school next september, I am trying to find what to "sale" to my ex as far as school and child support, ...

Should I go for:
- I pay no child support and you neither to me but you let him go to that school and I pay all the fees ???
or maybe:
- let's just agree on the school, we'll see child support latter and we both share 50/50 of school expenses ???

any other ideas ?
My ex's concerns are money and not feeling like I screwed her over. Of course I could just agree on the school, get my kid in my school district and then get the CS agency to actually have her pay me CS but then she'd feel screwed, ....
What is important for me is
- that imersion school
- neither pay each other CS
- we share school expenses

however school expenses aren't that great and temporary (I am not talking about college, just kindergarten).

what do you all think ?
Title: Have you asked your ex what she wants?
Post by: tulip on Dec 29, 2005, 02:45:40 PM
Does she have any ideas about how she wants it to go? What does your cs order say now? If you are sharing time 50/50, most people would agreee that no cs is the fair way to go. However it is very common for one parent (like your ex or my dh's ex) to fight for custody on paper in order to get cs and then once that is established to want the other parent to take care of them. Do you live close enough to her to keep that kind of parenting schedule when your son is in school?

I think if you can convince her to give up receiving cs so it is truly equal, you may have to eat the school expenses. The only reason I say that (not because it is necessarily fair) is because I know that you have already been down a long miserable road going through the courts and you probably want to keep from going back there anytime soon if you can. If the school is important to you, and not to the mom, she will use it to fight you for what she wants, which is $$. If you really believe that this school is what is best for your son you should be prepared that you may have to be the one to pay for it.