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Main Forums => Father's Issues => Topic started by: FL_48603 on Feb 06, 2005, 11:00:17 PM

Title: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: FL_48603 on Feb 06, 2005, 11:00:17 PM
In Re: CASE NUMBER: FL – 48603
       Undetected Abuse.

To Whom It May Concern:

My name is James Chamberlain and I am a resident of
Northern California at 865 Red Bluff CA 96080.

I am a non-custodial parent of a seven year old
daughter and my ex-wife's father is also her pro-bono
divorce attorney in Tahema County Superior Case: FL –

My ex-wife suffers from serious psychological
problems, caused our car to be reposessed, ran up
thousands of dollars in bills, bouncing checks to and
verbally abusing our landlord who then issued us
eviction papers, the after gambling our family's money
away while on a drug binge in Las Vegas, abducted our
child and fled our marriage.

In March of 1999 she abducted our child and
disappeared with her for weeks.

Nonetheless, she has been sheltered from these issues
and her father filed divorce papers to legitimize my
ex-wife's child kidnapping after the fact.

Recently I had to take my daughter to the doctor
because she was complaining of a sprained wrist.
While at the doctor's my daughter told the doctor that
the first time the child's wrist began hurting was
when "mommy was hitting" her (evidently the child was
blocking a blow).

Weeks later the child susatained a break to this same
wrist while in the mother's care, but rather than
taking the child to the hospital to have the wrist
examined and treated, the mother cloistered the child
at the grandmother's trailer in the hills of

Previously my ex-wife has had her father revoke my
parental rights and in each instance I gain them back
with more time with my child being granted to me than

Most recently when I restored my parental rights I
immediately took my daughter to get her teeth worked
on to discover that the mother had allowed the child
to go 7 years with only one trip to the dentist and
the child now had eight cavities, needed two root
canals and one molar extraction.

There are also issues of the mother enabling parental
alienation which while constituting emotional abuse is
far more challenging to track and prove.

Because of all of this I filed a motion to modify
custody so that I could act as Primary Caregiver while
the mother completes her schooling and whatever else
it is keeping her from caring sufficiently for my
daughter's needs.

This has dragged out for months and now when my
daughter is seen by counselors they all scratch their
heads and state that my daughter does not look like
she is being abused.

I explain that there is no way to detect the abuse in
a situation where the mother is aware she is under
scrutiny and even in light of the doctor's notes,
teacher's notes, dentist's notes and even the mother's
own admissions to returning to corporal punishment in
violation of the existing order which she submitted
under the penalty of perjury to The Court in her
responsive declaration - no body seems interested or
motivated to assist with contempt of court or criminal

I am trying right now to find statistics pertinent to
the number of children who are discovered to have been
abused which were previously undetected even by
counselors, etc.

Please advise,

James D. Chamberlain
865 Locust Street
Red Bluff CA 96080
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: Hawkeye on Feb 08, 2005, 04:46:29 PM
How about having local police do a "child welfare check" at the other parent's home when you first suspect something awry? If they don't catch her in the act of something, it may put her on notice that, at least someone, is watching. ;^)
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: Davy on Feb 08, 2005, 04:56:53 PM
Be sure to distinquish between 'Undetected'  and  'Ignored'.  
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: Hawkeye on Feb 08, 2005, 06:53:21 PM
School officials got some phone calls at [bold]home tonite[/bold], I for one, am not putting up with a crazy ass ex....  as well as police officers.

I've had enough of one week of a crazy person/co-parent... whatever she wants to call herself.... Welcome back, Kitty C.... I owe ya one.

Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: Hawkeye on Feb 08, 2005, 11:37:58 PM
well, Slap me up and downside the other, but hey...
Dr. Phill... what are you trying to say here?

You might just find yerself on the wrongside of orneryhill...  

What are we talkin' here?
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: FL_48603 on Feb 10, 2005, 09:27:33 AM
Where you wrote:

>>Be sure to distinquish between 'Undetected' and 'Ignored'.<<

I have distinguished.  It is being ignored.  It is being ignored because my ex-wife's father is a lawyer who was up for a judgeship and therefore very influencial in politial circles.

There is also an apparent gender-bias which is overwhelming.  I mean, I have shown doctor's notes, school notes, for Christ's sake the ex-wife admits in her own responsive declaration "under the penalty of purjury" to have conducted the behaviors which are in violation of the order of the court.

Remember, this is a 7 year old child who has been conspicuously sheltered from the "outside" world - a known symptom of abusiveness.  Noone can quite put their finger on why my ex-wife has been so diligent in revoking my parental rights, time after time.

Then as soon as I have the "right" to take my daughter to the doctor and dentist, the first thing my daughter reports to the doctor is that "mommy's hitting" hust her wrist.  I then discover a mouth full of eight cavities, the need for two root canals and I had to take her to her her molar extracted.

The only thing my ex-wife had to say to me when I would report my daughgter flinching when she drank warm or cool fluids was: "she is doing it for attention...your side of the family suffer from a lot of tooth decay, maybe she sees you family complaining of tooth pain and is acting that out for attention".

The child needed a molar to be extracted because the mother preferred to dismiss the child's need while projecting the sympton onto the father's side of the family.

But the mother boasts in her responsive declaration to having finished her undergraduate studies in "record time" as if my concerns about the neglect and abuse of the child is somehow answered by the mother's successful college careeer?

I have paid on average $100-$200.00 extra monthly in support in direct exchange for more time with my daughter.

Where'd the money go?  To the mother's college tuition or to the child's dental needs?

So, yeah, when people say that they don't see the abuse and neglect of the child is it "ignoring" yeah, it is.

Can anyone imagine the uproar is a woman who had been battered, when she appeared to her TRO hearing was told by the judge: "you don't look battered, you don't fit the profile of a battered woman, just leave everything the way it is and let's hope things work themselves out."

There'd be letters written, and legal action taken on a high level to correct the matter and a judge would lose his job.

But when it come to a child's needs, and moreover the child who is the daughter of an "officer" of "the court"...

...what "best intereste of the child"!?! be the judge.
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: FL_48603 on Feb 10, 2005, 09:29:59 AM
Thank goodness for this message board area.  It is so refreshing to find like minded indivinduals who try to get together to help one another, as opposed to the usual sepulcher of mindlessness which fills the internet.
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: FL_48603 on Feb 10, 2005, 09:32:36 AM
>>School officials got some phone calls at [bold]home tonite[/bold], I for one, am not putting up with a crazy ass ex....  as well as police officers. I've had enough of one week of a crazy person/co-parent...>whatever she wants to call herself.... Welcome back, Kitty C.... I owe ya one.<<

Was this meant to be of any usefullness to my situation? If so would you kindly translate for me.   Who the hell is Kitty C?
Title: RE: Undetected Abuse.
Post by: FL_48603 on Feb 10, 2005, 09:51:26 AM
Good call.  It's just so difficult to "catch" her "red-handed".  Her family stands guard in a really sick, co-dependent way.

Grandma (who has been brainwashing my daughtger coercing my daughter to aatend a church where they preach that "daddy is wrong for taking you to his church" because "daddy's church is a CULT and he is making sure you will go to Hell") comes over weekly to clean and to make sure that everything is CPS-Ready.

On the one ocassion that my daughter was forced by circumstance to come with me to my lawyer's office (at a time before my ex-wife knew I had retained one), the very next morning I noticed grandma's truck was out in front of my ex-wife's home.

When I called to see how my daughter was doing I was told: "just fine...everything is under control...she's just been sick".  I came by and took my daughter to the doctor to have her examined.  She was diagnosed as being just fine, although the doctor noted that on a hot summer day, to have the child so bundled up was not a good idea.

So the question that this begs is: "...why on a hot summer's week, is this child kept home, kept cloistered in her room bundled up in sweats, rather than at school when the child is not ill..."

This is the same grandma whose trailer the child was cloistered at for 6 days dirctly following the breaking of the same wrist which was injured weeks earlier.

The question here begs: "...why was the child cloistered in the hills for 6 days instread of taking her to the hospital..."

My lawyer at the time (whom I ended up firing for sneaking into bed with the enemy) advised me not to call CPS but to get a state licensed 3rd party to report the abuses.

The only thing I thought would be effective is to have the doctors, teachers, etc., who had knowledge of the facts submit write ups of the facts and enter those into my declaration in a motion requesting modification of custody.

When I did this, my ex-wife immediately switched into " I didn't you did..." mode and now we are right back where we started, with counselors and mediators doing the whole "...oh you poor victimized thing, let us coddle you and shower you with social services and we'll help you get that brooding neanderthol".

I mean, it's gotten to where a father can't even say, "hey, my kid is hurting" without the "system" responding by putting me on trial to determine whether or not I have hurt the mother's reputation by asking the very questions I am bound by the order of the court to ask.

Just crucify me and get it over with.  Take my child and reduce her to another statistic, strangle any voice that should dare question the precious "status quo".

Just make sure that you pretend to really care and support "family values" or whatever the political mantra of the day might be while you drive in the nails.