Newbie here and need some help.
Non married couple been living together for 4 years, have 2 boys...5 year old (not biologically mine, not adopted), 16 mo old (mine). Mom does not work, has no car and no residence (other than the one we have together). She recently filed for disability for an old injury to her back (very minor), social anxiety and BiPolar.
I was served with child support papers and our discussion turned into an argument one week ago yesterday. This issue that I had was the "conservatorship", all I did was let her know that we needed to have shared custody,,,,,she was completely against it, saying that it would affect the payment amount. I told her that I would let the court know that my only issue was the conservatorship and I would stipulate to any support amount that I could afford. She was having none of that, the argument went on and on til we just went into separate rooms.
3 hours later she is asking if they could go spend the night at her moms so they can go to a waterpark the next day. The next day, everything is normal except (we had been having car issues) she says that she had to put the car in the shop and didn't get to go.....asked if it was okay to stay over there and go to the waterpark on Thursday. Thursday was a normal day of contact....phone calls, messaging back and forth, etc.
When I get home from work on Thursday, she has moved all of her stuff (and the kid's) out of our residence.
She informs me that she has taken the kids away because she "knows what I've been doing". I find out that she took the younger child to the ER Wednesday morning saying that I had sexually abused him.
I was contacted by a CPS worker Friday at noon. She says she just got the case and had a few questions for me......She called me again Yesterday morning and told me that she is closing the case. Yes, the case was open for a day and a half. She says that the children have NOT been abused, but that the mother was very adamant about wanting me to be arrested.
I would like to know if anyone can provide advice.....
What can I do to see my child if she refuses to let me see him under any conditions? Is there a document that I can file before we have our child support hearing?
Has anyone dealt with usfamilyadvocates.com?? They want to do the paperwork for my hearings and then I would take those forms down to the court clerk and file them myself. I would be acting Pro Se (represent myself)....just giving the written arguments to the judge I guess. I have spoken with Jeremy McCready and some guy named Rory.
How you would proceed depends on what state you're in, and a bunch of other things. Some states won't even recognize you as the father if you and your ex weren't married, so that would mean that you can't be required to pay child support. But on the other hand, until you have a custody order filed with the court you can't do anything about insisting the children visit you, either.
I haven't heard of the website that you mentioned but I did go look at it. This is what I found...
QuoteIn order to enroll with our services and become a member of the program, there is a one-time registration fee of $100.00***. There is a monthly fee of $39.50*** per month to remain in the program beginning seven days after your enrollment date. There is no contract to sign -- you may elect to cancel your membership at any time. What the $100.00 enrollment fee and the $39.50 monthly recurring charge cover is your unlimited access to your case manager. Following your enrollment, we guarantee that your Case Manager will contact you within 24 hours to immediately begin working with you on your case. We further guarantee that you will always get calls to your Case Manager timely returned (always within 24 hours).
And this...
QuoteUS Family Advocates is not a law firm, its agents are not attorneys and it cannot offer "legal advice."
I can't make a suggestion one way or the other regarding this website, but I just wanted to make sure that you were informed.
Thank you for your kind response. I was beginning to think that noone would.
I am on the baby's birth certificate and we're in Denton County of Texas. I assume that being on the cert gives me responsibilities and privileges of fatherhood.
After not seeing them for 10 days she shows up at 3:30 in my work's parking lot. When I went out side, the youngest was sleeping. I was able to hug, hold and talk to each child but she was in the background making stoopid comments repeatedly. First of all, our youngest (probably like everyone) doesn't like to wake up all of a sudden. He's my little sunshine, but he hasn't seen me in a week and a half.....well each time he reached for his mom or something, she would say, "see, he doesn't want you to hurt him".....remember the false claims of abuse??
Quote from: luieluie on Jul 31, 2009, 06:06:58 AM
Thank you for your kind response. I was beginning to think that noone would.
I am on the baby's birth certificate and we're in Denton County of Texas. I assume that being on the cert gives me responsibilities and privileges of fatherhood.
No, it doesn't. I just posted information for someone else in Texas yesterday and you and the mother must sign an Acknowledgement of Paternity (AOP).
Quote
- Under Texas law, a child born to a man and woman who are not married has no legal father. There is a difference between a biological father and a legal father. When the child's parents complete an Acknowledgment of Paternity (AOP) to establish legal fatherhood, this helps to secure the legal rights of the child.
- Courts cannot order a father to pay child support until paternity is established.
- The father cannot enforce his right to visitation or possession of the child until paternity is established.
How is it done?
It's simple. An AOP can be obtained from the hospital, usually from the birth registrar in Medical Records. The father and mother sign the form, and the hospital staff send the AOP to the Bureau of Vital Statistics (BVS), where it is filed.
Will signing the Acknowledgment of Paternity make a person the legal father?
Yes, when the mother and father both sign the AOP, the biological father becomes the legal father once the AOP is filed at the BVS.
http://www.oag.state.tx.us/AG_Publications/txts/paternity.shtml (http://www.oag.state.tx.us/AG_Publications/txts/paternity.shtml)
Did you and your ex sign and file a POA? If not, you might use offering child support as a bargaining chip. You sign the POA with me, we file it, and then we'll file for child support (
and a custody order which gives you very clear visitation rights). Because she can't force you to pay support until there's a POA.
Not to worry about affects of the abuse allegation. CPS closed the case very quickly, so that's a very good thing. You might want to see if you can get a copy of the final report on that for your files. (Yes, you need to start keeping documents on what's happening - for your own safety and to help you with getting visitation.)
Anything odd that happens, write it down and keep a record. Paperwork is your friend. Document, document, document!
[.
- Courts cannot order a father to pay child support until paternity is established.
- The father cannot enforce his right to visitation or possession of the child until paternity is established.
http://www.oag.state.tx.us/AG_Publications/txts/paternity.shtml (http://www.oag.state.tx.us/AG_Publications/txts/paternity.shtml)
Did you and your ex sign and file a POA? If not, you might use offering child support as a bargaining chip. You sign the POA with me, we file it, and then we'll file for child support (
and a custody order which gives you very clear visitation rights). Because she can't force you to pay support until there's a POA.
Not to worry about affects of the abuse allegation. CPS closed the case very quickly, so that's a very good thing. You might want to see if you can get a copy of the final report on that for your files. (Yes, you need to start keeping documents on what's happening - for your own safety and to help you with getting visitation.)
Anything odd that happens, write it down and keep a record. Paperwork is your friend. Document, document, document!
The mother's behavior is deplorable and goes directly to rhe well-being of the children. One should not assume the mother becomes the managing conservator and the father becomes the possessory conservator paying CS and begging for access to his children. The false allegations are serious and a burden on the system. Jurisdictions close to Denton county are "enlightened" so the mother probably lost any favorability she may have had with the court in addition to uprooting the children from their home. I suspect Denton count may also been enlightened as well but I'm not sure. Also, start building an indexed case file of any and all related documents. I think this father has a leg up in this process and should focus on the long term impact on the children rather than jumping thru hoops in the short term.
Thanks for all the great responses!! It is really appreciated. I really don't know what I'm doing in all this stuff, feel like I've been thrown to the wolves. I spoke with a few attorneys and they all want 3-4K to take on my case. I wish I had the funds available!! Looks like I will have to work with one that will let me pay them in installments, but they won't file anything for me until I get to a particular cash level.
Looks like I will have to file an answer to the Child Support papers myself. I found some help online (a template) and have just filled it out with a General Denial and then a statement that the child should be ordered to be covered by my insurance. Looks like I still have until the Monday after the 13th to get the Answer filed with the court.
When my son was born, we completed and signed an Acknowledgement of Paternity. I have the original and a copy was sent along with the Child Support papers.
She is supposed to bring him by for a visit today (yes, once again before 5 o'clock, meaning that I will miss some work). Otherwise, I have seen him for a total of 15 minutes in the past 14 days. She has let me speak to my other (non-biological 5 year old) son on the phone everyday. Sometimes she'll put the phone up to my youngest, but then she'll say "he pushes the phone away when he hears your voice"....and then something stoopid like "he doesn't want you to hurt him anymore".
Until you file for custody, she can do whatever she wants with not having you see the child. Does your local court have Family Law duty-counsel at the courthouse? Some areas will have duty-counsel at the courthouse that can give you basic, free advice.
There's an anti-family Law Office at the court house. It's called the Office of Child Support. A father should not cooperate with this office until a custodial parent has been determined. CS is not automatic and children should not be withheld from a parent as bargaining chips as if this were a poker game in a casino. These proceedures and this woman are very much showing themselves as unfit to have anything to do with the welfare of children. Think about it and speak out with the truth of what this woman is doing.
Quote from: Davy on Aug 03, 2009, 10:00:05 AM
There's an anti-family Law Office at the court house. It's called the Office of Child Support. A father should not cooperate with this office until a custodial parent has been determined. CS is not automatic and children should not be withheld from a parent as bargaining chips as if this were a poker game in a casino. These proceedures and this woman are very much showing themselves as unfit to have anything to do with the welfare of children. Think about it and speak out with the truth of what this woman is doing.
I have not said anything about the "Office of Child Support". And you are not helping anyone when you give attacking, negative answers like this. If you're so knowledgable about the Texas system then give the people positive, supportive advice that they can use and be assured of.
By what you're saying, you may scare people away from seeking out local support and guidance that may be offered at their local courthouse.
At my courthouse, they DO have Family Law duty-counsel (a neutral attorney) that can help you file paperwork and help you understand the laws. I've used them myself and they were a great help. I can't answer for what Texas offers in the way of guidance, but at least I can let people know that they should check and see if help is available, just to be sure.
Whoa back. Snowrose. The OP spoke of filing with CS and attorneys that want 3-4k, etc, etc. So notice that this woman has the children and is demainding child support based of false allegations to CPS which were unfounded. In other words CPS and the CS office are colllaborating with free advice and assistance to make this woman the managing conservator with out ever stepping into a courthouse or paying a dime to attorneys.
You conveniently skip over the important facts and your only advice is to see if your Texas court house offers males free advice and assistance because where you live females get it.
And then you patronize another poster that speaks the truth. How manipulative. If you have something or anything to help the OP then great but don't throw any off guard and get him to chasing his own tail with empty hopes especially when the welfare of children is at stake. These children are at risk based on this woman's behavior.
I can help this father but I'm not going to waller in your crap to do it.
Quote from: Davy on Aug 03, 2009, 03:02:58 PM
You conveniently skip over the important facts and your only advice is to see if your Texas court house offers males free advice and assistance because where you live females get it.
My DH used the same duty-counsel before we'd even met, when he was going for his divorce and custody.
Davy, we get it that you hate "the system". Believe me, since my DH went for (and through incredible foolishness by BM got) custody of my SD we're not fond of it either. But let's not throw the baby out with the bath water by telling folks not to look and see if free help is available just because other portions of the system doesn't make it easy for fathers.
As it happens I will be in Denton county court tomorrow. I'll let you know what they say.
Quote from: Davy on Aug 03, 2009, 09:47:44 PM
As it happens I will be in Denton county court tomorrow. I'll let you know what they say.
Yes, but that will only tell us about Denton county - and possibly about TX itself. It still doesn't tell us about anywhere else. Even if TX doesn't have duty counsel or some other form of advisor/support that doesn't mean the other 49 states don't.
My point is that your experience doesn't negate other people's experiences. Just because you haven't found help doesn't mean others haven't. That's why we need to discuss everyone's experiences, to give folks enough information that they can know there
may be help out there - but you have to look to make sure.
No ... you won't accept intelligent communication so I want you to get it from the horses mouth. It is what we call 'embarassin' just to ask such a moron question but I'll handle it (duh). I doubt if they can stop laughing long enough to get an answer.
The OP is in Denton and Texas and you and your DH's experience in la-la land is not pertinant to helping the OP. You are not helping with the really important issues in this matter so you want to change the issue to receiving non-existent free services. geesh !!
Hye guys, hate to see y'all arguing. I appreciate any and all input.
At this hearing for child support, the papers ask the court to assign "conservatorship". Can someone explain (in simple terms) the difference between the court assigning this and the court assigning custody?? Aren't they the same?? If I want sole (or shared) custody is this the time for me to fight tooth and nail?? OR is this just a formality in order to deal with child support??
If we have lived together since he was born (which I can prove with a lease agreement and utility bills) and she just moved out on the the 21st of July, what are the important issues to tell the court? Because we weren't married (and she didn't have too much faith in our staying together) SHE made sure the child was receiving Medicaid.......however I was completely supporting all 3 of them myself. How does that factor into all of it?
Am I going to be okay going Pro Se?? I have the hearing for child support coming up and I don't have an attorney....I filed a response (a General Denial) myself. I am not familiar with civil procedure, but was going to walk in there as best prepared as I can be. Am I being a fool to try this without an attorney?? I can't currently afford the fees that I've been quoted and the hearing dates are set.
Conservatorship is another word for guardianship. Look at the papers and see if they're setting things up to make the child a ward of the state or if they're going to assign a parent as the guardian. (When my mother died, I became first a ward of the state and later my grandmother became my guardian.)
What do the papers say about the conservatorship?
Luieluie.... Please review my posts. "Conservatorship" is another word for custody. A
Managing Conservator (MC) is named first and the Possessory Convervator (PC) is then
ordered to pay child support (CS) to the MC. The MC is not held accountable for the CS
received. The PC is held accountable for the CS paid and non-payment for whatever reason
will result in loss of driving privileges and/or county jail. The PC MAY receive "visitation" but
the access to the children MAY also be restricted or supervised especially in light of the false
accusations (even unfounded).
In your case, it appears that Texas CPS is providing guidance and support to file against you in court and it may even be a desiginated CPS court. Typically, CPS is full on anti-family, anti-male feminest that could care less about children. It appears you are in neeed of legal help. Check for info. on this site in the articles section particularly about interviewing attorneys. I think Fathers for Equal Rights meets thurs nights in downtown Dallas. Normally there are attorneys offering free advice and they'll probably guide you on Denton County and recommend attorneys.
In case you're wandering ... I was MC.
QuoteTexas has now adopted presumptive Joint Managing Conservatorship. The court is required to appoint both parents as Joint Managing Conservators unless it finds that the appointment would significantly impair the child's physical health or emotional development.
http://library.findlaw.com/2000/Jul/1/131093.html (http://library.findlaw.com/2000/Jul/1/131093.html)
This is the order of events.....
....SO is served with AOP regarding child support and conservatorship
....I tell SO that I want atleast joint conservatorship, don't really care too much about the support
....within HOURS she leaves under false pretenses
....the next morning she goes to ER with false allegations
....CPS has case for 1 day and 1/2 (working days) and notifies me that the case is CLOSED
I would think that the timeline makes it very clear that CPS is not involved in the AOP at all. I have the written report from CPS and they make no mention of DA, police or any other govt agency. The CPS worker told me (more than once) that she had NO problem with the child seeing me, but that it was up to the mother (because she had possession of the child)
I have filed my answer to the AOP asking for joint managing conservatorship and primary possession. I also asked for a TRO, psychological evaluation, drug test, social study and an immediate visitation order.
This is what the papers say.....
"Parentage of the child subject of this suit was established when a properly executed Acknowledgement of Paternity was filed with the Vital Statistics Unit persuant to Texas Family Code, Chapter 160. Because the parents of the child are separated, the court should appoint appropriate conservators persuant to Texas Family Code 153.005."
Also, in the WITHOULDING FROM EARNINGS FOR SUPPORT section it says, ........
"If appropriate, the Court should order (me) to post a bond or security.".....what does that mean??
EXCELLENT. You sound comfortable and confident. Good for you and Amen !!
The hearing for the TRO and the othe Temp Orders is set for 3:30pm on the 20th, so I'll let ya'll know what happened.
I also subpoened (sp?) the CPS case worker. Does anyone know if that means that I will be able to ask her questions or if it just means the judge will?? I plan on asking her questions that I have ALREADY asked her so that the answers can be heard by the judge.
In one of my motions I refered to the mother as the "Petitioner".....is this incorrect?? If you remember this case was originally started by the Office of the Attorney General, doesn't that make them the Petitioner?? If so, will the judge throw out the motion or will he cut me some slack as an Alienated Father just trying to do the Pro Se thingie to see his child??
Quote from: luieluie on Jul 31, 2009, 06:06:58 AM
Thank you for your kind response. I was beginning to think that noone would.
I am on the baby's birth certificate and we're in Denton County of Texas. I assume that being on the cert gives me responsibilities and privileges of fatherhood.
After not seeing them for 10 days she shows up at 3:30 in my work's parking lot. When I went out side, the youngest was sleeping. I was able to hug, hold and talk to each child but she was in the background making stoopid comments repeatedly. First of all, our youngest (probably like everyone) doesn't like to wake up all of a sudden. He's my little sunshine, but he hasn't seen me in a week and a half.....well each time he reached for his mom or something, she would say, "see, he doesn't want you to hurt him".....remember the false claims of abuse??
You have a double whammy because you are dealing with a bi polar parent. Start documenting every visitation interaction, phone call, EVERYTHING. If you can get someone to be present (a neutral party who is nonthreatening) when you do the pick ups and drop offs. And get a temp order for visitation in place as soon as you can. If you can represent pro se then do it yourself. Request reasonable visitation and phone contact that does not interfere with daily activities. Like 6 pm at night each night. They will challenge it but you can use the actions and accusations of your ex to request the court appoint a psychologist because the welfare of the kids is at stake. It never hurts to ask.
Geez I am not clarifying worth a damn tonight. Ask for phone contact at 6 pm every night. Ask for reasonable visitation. If your son is under school age ask for every other week with you and meet in the middle. Ask for the day after Christmas EVERY year for one week. Father's day. His birthday every other year.
You don't want to go in asking for everything, you want to stay fair and reasonable. She will hang herself.
Quote from: luieluie on Aug 10, 2009, 02:42:46 PM
This is the order of events.....
....SO is served with AOP regarding child support and conservatorship
....I tell SO that I want atleast joint conservatorship, don't really care too much about the support
....within HOURS she leaves under false pretenses
....the next morning she goes to ER with false allegations
....CPS has case for 1 day and 1/2 (working days) and notifies me that the case is CLOSED
I would think that the timeline makes it very clear that CPS is not involved in the AOP at all. I have the written report from CPS and they make no mention of DA, police or any other govt agency. The CPS worker told me (more than once) that she had NO problem with the child seeing me, but that it was up to the mother (because she had possession of the child)
I have filed my answer to the AOP asking for joint managing conservatorship and primary possession. I also asked for a TRO, psychological evaluation, drug test, social study and an immediate visitation order.
This is what the papers say.....
"Parentage of the child subject of this suit was established when a properly executed Acknowledgement of Paternity was filed with the Vital Statistics Unit persuant to Texas Family Code, Chapter 160. Because the parents of the child are separated, the court should appoint appropriate conservators persuant to Texas Family Code 153.005."
Also, in the WITHOULDING FROM EARNINGS FOR SUPPORT section it says, ........
"If appropriate, the Court should order (me) to post a bond or security.".....what does that mean??
Okay the bond or security is the posting of a cash amount set by the judge to insure you pay child support.
Can you file pro se? And have you called legal aid? Child support will be ordered regardless of who has custody, but you want to file to challenge her status as having sole custody. You also VERY MUCH want to get a psychologist involved to oversee what she is saying and doing to the kids and to oversee your interactions with the kids. Can you request a guardian ad litem be appointed for the kids right now? Or do they not do that in Denton County?
I spoke with Legal Aid and Equal Right's for Fathers. I ended up filing Pro Se.
Yes, I asked the Court to appoint a Guardian Ad Litem.
I have a journal of all of our interactions since she left. I have been calling every morning at 10 am to ask if I can see him that day......a few times she would tell me "maybe" and that she would have to see how things worked out. Ultimately, she would call that evening and say that it wasn't going to happen.......the first 2 times that I saw him (I've only seen him 3 since she left), she came up to my WORK during the day. She would call and say "we're out here if you want to come out and see them".......Isn't this just a bunch of psychological abuse?
I can't believe that I'm actually having to go through all of this. Things were not supposed to be like this way and I would have never thought that I would have to fight to see my son.
Quote from: luieluie on Aug 13, 2009, 06:13:07 AM
I spoke with Legal Aid and Equal Right's for Fathers. I ended up filing Pro Se.
Yes, I asked the Court to appoint a Guardian Ad Litem.
I have a journal of all of our interactions since she left. I have been calling every morning at 10 am to ask if I can see him that day......a few times she would tell me "maybe" and that she would have to see how things worked out. Ultimately, she would call that evening and say that it wasn't going to happen.......the first 2 times that I saw him (I've only seen him 3 since she left), she came up to my WORK during the day. She would call and say "we're out here if you want to come out and see them".......Isn't this just a bunch of psychological abuse?
I can't believe that I'm actually having to go through all of this. Things were not supposed to be like this way and I would have never thought that I would have to fight to see my son.
She is playing the control card. I don't want to feed you any of the horror stories, because what you are going through is very difficult and it will get worse before it gets better. But, it does get better. You are doing everything you can, and just stay on track. Its all you can do.
She will always be who she is, and you can't change her. The only thing you can do is fight with what resources you have available to you. The huge upside is she sounds like she is cocky, and having a blast playing her games. She will ultimately be the catalyst to sway the judge in your favor.
A child psychologist would be a great asset for you to have. See if you can't get one using the sexual abuse allegations as a reason. What you want to do is get the psychologist to evaluate you, your ex, and to start meeting with your son once a week.
I will wager that your ex will find ways to avoid having your son in to see the psychologist but that will all come out when the psychologist testifies and go in your favor. Judges like to have psychologists that do work already for the county, because they are more familiar with them. So find one that works with foster kids and/or has been appointed by the courts before.
I tried to get help for my hubby through Fathers United and outside of a support group, they really weren't much help to him. I don't have a high opinion of family law lawyers because they are not well regulated and so its very hard to find one that effectively advocates for you. Pro Se is a terrifying and stressful ordeal, but the upside is that you are advocating for yourself.
From what I understand .... this is really scary.
The Attorney General (and county offices) apparently is the petitioner in this CIVIL matter and this/these offices are CRIMINAL PROSECUTORS for the state. How or why are they inserting themselves in a family matter that is clearly CIVIL ... the custody and support of children. A custodial parent has not even been determined at htis point AND neither parent has been named to pay child support.
I hope one parent can't just take a child from their home while the other parent is at work and the state government not only allows it but promotes it then petitions in court for the clearly lying abusive parent against the good parent.
Really scary. Can someone tell me this is not true.
The CPS case worker received her subpoena and has already called me.....I guess she wanted to see if we were going to ask for a continuance so that she could testify (WTF??!! the whole idea of a "temporary order hearing" is to get some type of quick order on the books from the Court while the case is pending.)
.....according to her, the Court probably won't do anything BUT issue a continuance.....she says that she is speaking from experience and the fact that the case was set for 330 pm on a Thursday. I told her that I was sorry if it inconvenienced her, but I needed her there because of the FALSE ACCUSATIONS that have been made.....I simply cannot go into court without her.
Can someone give me an idea of what to expect during my upcoming hearing on temporary orders??
Is she correct that the Court will probably just issue a continuance without taking action on any of the Temporary Orders I requested?
Due to a scheduling conflict (Jury trial in progress) my hearing was reset.
Can someone please explain what type of form I am to use to notify the Petitioner and my witness (under subpoena) of the new hearing date? Like, what the name of the form is so I can find it online.
Thanks.
Just use the the format of motions and other notices (IE court #, location, etc along with Petitioner and Respondent). Put "NOTICE of Revised Hearing Date" centered above a pararaph with the verbage for date, time and place.
Geez this is almost as bad as it was in MD. They actually schedule the cases for divorce/child custody around the criminal hearings. So you can go in for your divorce hearing and have a murder trial take place with the same judge right after you and if its before you forget having your case heard that day.
I was contacted by the mother today. She wants to know what type of agreement I would be okay with, to present to the Court (assuming the Court would agree to our written agreement). She asked me to put it in writing so that she could review and agree or not agree to it.
At this point (and after all I've been through) I think the only thing that I will agree to is what I have asked the Court for....
Joint managing conservators and I be given primary possession. Standard Visitation for her.
I'm pretty sure that I'm just going to write it out and send it to her for her signature.
Thoughts??
I still think you are right to stand your ground. She is not likely to sign your agreement, but and this is JMO but she may be thinking she can use this to show that she tried to work it out with you amicably thinking it could go in her favor, or she could be worried about the fact that you have the CPS worker set to testify.
Have you looked into the psychologist yet?
Just a little update.
I went to the Courts, grabbed my case file and went to each and every court to see if they would put it on their docket....many of them offered, but noone could do a date earlier than I already had (09-08-09), so that didn't work.
I now have absolutely no way of contacting them. About a week ago, she'd answer emails, but now she says that she won't respond as long as their is a TRO against her.....says that if I want her to talk with me, to have it lifted.
I filed a petition Monday requesting that the Court assess her a civil penalty for filing a False Report of Child Abuse. I cited the paragraph in the Texas Family Code that says she can be fined up to $500 if she is a party to a SAPCR before she knowingly makes a report of abuse and then there ends up being no factual foundation for the report. This instance fulfills the statutory requirements so the Court can assess a penalty.
She has not responded to my "Proposed" Parenting Plan at all. I think we all knew she wouldn't go along with it.
Luie Luie
I applaud all your endeavors and further your ability to act on all issues rather than re-acting as well as your non-dying focus on the children.
It seems to me she continues to demonstrate numerous pertinant reasons as to why she should NOT be a primary managing conservator.
Getting ready to finally see a Judge on Tuesday....
question....
I went back and re-read all the motions I submitted and on my "Original Answer" where I did a Counter Petition for custody and Temporary Orders, ....I noticed that I made a couple of mistakes when referring to myself and the Mother (Respondent/Petitioner/Counter Respondent/Counter Respondent)
Is the Court just going to dismiss my Petition for the mistake??
I have already drafted Motions to Modify and I'm taking with them with me, just in case I need them.
The TRO is active and in place now? If it is, then you should not be talking to her and she is right not talking to you (she can be arrested) Next time you are at court you can ask that the TRO have "XX may email regarding visits only". This way she is "allowed" to talk to you. Call the court where it was given and ask.
Quote from: ocean on Sep 04, 2009, 02:58:36 PM
The TRO is active and in place now? If it is, then you should not be talking to her and she is right not talking to you (she can be arrested) Next time you are at court you can ask that the TRO have "XX may email regarding visits only". This way she is "allowed" to talk to you. Call the court where it was given and ask.
Our speficic TRO has no language in it that prohibits communication unless it is abusive.....and then, it's not enforceable by the Police. I don't think I've ever heard of someone being "arrested" for placing one civil phone call. Our TRO is primarily in place to restrict movement of the child.
Anyway, here's an update......
She showed up with an Attorney, I am still Pro Se.
On the motion for Temporary Orders the Judge ordered....
.....The TRO will stay in place until the case in final
.....The mother was ordered to submit to a UA yesterday
.....We will both have a psychological evaluation
.....There will be a social study performed
.....I will see my son for a supervised visit of 4 hours this saturday
.....On the 3rd weekend of September I will have my son from 8-6 on both Sat and Sun
.....Starting in October, I will have my son from 8am on Sat til 6pm Sun on the 1st, 3rd and 5th weekends.
.....Starting in October, I will have one mid week visit on Thursday from 6pm to 8pm
.....The case will be moved from an Associate Judge (doing child support cases) to a District court
.....We go back to Court on Dec 7th to give a "status update" to the Judge.
Seeing as though I have spent approximately 3 hours with my son since July 21st, I am extremely happy with the outcome.
Excellent!! Congratulations, Luieluie!!
One thing I would suggest just based on experiences that friends of mine have had. When you go to pick up your son, have a copy of your temporary order with you - like in the glove compartment of your car.
I've seen several BM's now who suddenly create some kind of drama and start acting as though you're stealing the child. If BM starts something like that, I'd suggest that you be the one to call the police and get them to the scene, then show them the temporary order.
Also, if BM acts anything like that I'd suggest that you request that the police file a report, so you have something to show the judge when you go back to court.
Good luck!!
Also, bring and friend AND a camcorder with you. You will need a witness and if you're alone at the exchange, she can say anything and you can't refute it. Witnesses and recording helps to keep people honest. If all else fails, request that the exchanges take place at a police station.
When I look at the Court records online, I see that the same day that her lawyer took the case there were some documents filed. It says....
"Sensitive/Confidential Documents Filed
(Filed in secure location)" Anyone have an idea as to what they are? I will have to go up to the Court to see them, but was just wondering what everyone thought.Also,The CPS Worker brought a 3 inch stack of papers that I had admitted into evidence. I haven't even seen any of it yet......it was in a sealed envelope and she handed it directly to the Judge. I assume that all I have to do is ask for the case file and those papers will be made available.
LuieLuie, For your considerations.
You WILL be able to get a copy of any and all documents on file with the court (irrelevant of how they are filed). It is normally considered a good practice for pro se' advocates to check your case file just before the clerks deliver it to the judge before each hearing. Attorneys have been known to file motions without notifying you. Of course, each party can verbally motion the court during a hearing.
If you use any recording devices (recommended) it is best for the device to be hidden and the source NOT be aware of the recording. Judges may not accept even certified recordings as evidence in civil procedings (but it is helpful for the opposing party to become aware of the recordings in a timely manner) but they are an excellent CYA tool as a keep out of jail free card.
Think long and hard before calling the police. Usually they can not act on civil court orders but will act on anything of a criminal nature especially involving children. Just FYI, I don't know if Denton county is functioning like Collin and Dallas county but the police in those counties are defintely forcing people into mental hospitals without reason.
In May I and 2 others coached/helped this young mother get out of Green Oaks (Dallas). She was upset with her EX and went to the Garland PD to ask for assistance. He had the 3 children for the weekend. The PD called the EX and he said put her in Green Oaks which they did. She had great insurance. After 10 days, she was in jeopardy of losing her job and her kids. She had taken a stand and refused any medication. The bottom line, many people that need/want to be there have no insurance and are limited to 4 days service. Those with insurance are there until the cows come home. I did not know this person before and have not seen her since. She was educated, had a good job and of sound mind and character. There were 6 like people (all had called 911) from Dallas and Collin county at the time and I was recently told their population has now at least doubled. Just be careful.
I'm very surprised that an associate judge (Child support) can make any custody determinations ... I've always understood it HAD TO BE a District Court judge. Of course make sure you have a "Court Order" signed by a judge.
Great job. Best to ya.
Luieluie,
Regarding "I assume that all I have to do is ask for the case file and those papers will be made available..." Don't assume that. In many areas, if you want a copy of filings, you have to go to the courthouse and pay a copying fee for those. It may be different in your area, but it has been my experience if you want copies, you have to pay for them.
Also, I have found while on-line services notes filings in family law, they never have access to the actual documents online. That is fairly common.
LuieLuie, For your considerations.
You WILL be able to get a copy of any and all documents on file with the court (irrelevant of how they are filed). It is normally considered a good practice for pro se' advocates to check your case file just before the clerks deliver it to the judge before each hearing. Attorneys have been known to file motions without notifying you. Of course, each party can verbally motion the court during a hearing.
If you use any recording devices (recommended) it is best for the device to be hidden and the source NOT be aware of the recording. Judges may not accept even certified recordings as evidence in civil procedings (but it is helpful for the opposing party to become aware of the recordings in a timely manner) but they are an excellent CYA tool as a keep out of jail free card.
Think long and hard before calling the police. Usually they can not act on civil court orders but will act on anything of a criminal nature especially involving children. Just FYI, I don't know if Denton county is functioning like Collin and Dallas county but the police in those counties are defintely forcing people into mental hospitals without reason.
In May I and 2 others coached/helped this young mother get out of Green Oaks (Dallas). She was upset with her EX and went to the Garland PD to ask for assistance. He had the 3 children for the weekend. The PD called the EX and he said put her in Green Oaks which they did. She had great insurance. After 10 days, she was in jeopardy of losing her job and her kids. She had taken a stand and refused any medication. The bottom line, many people that need/want to be there have no insurance and are limited to 4 days service. Those with insurance are there until the cows come home. I did not know this person before and have not seen her since. She was educated, had a good job and of sound mind and character. There were 6 like people (all had called 911) from Dallas and Collin county at the time and I was recently told their population has now at least doubled. Just be careful.
I'm very surprised that an associate judge (Child support) can make any custody determinations ... I've always understood it HAD TO BE a District Court judge. Of course make sure you have a "Court Order" signed by a judge.
Great job. Best to ya.
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