SPARC Forums

I'm getting a divorce and papers will be filled next month. We are doing a split custody of the kids. We will both have them the same amount of time. She has been a stay at home mom for the last 5 years but has been working for the last 6 months. I do make a lot more than she does. We have 2 kids and she said that if I say I will pay child support she will sign off for no spousal support. She wants $500 a month. I'm not a dead beat dad and want to take care of my kids. But I don't think I should have to pay child support for the next 13 years. What I was wondering is if I could pay spousal support of $500 for the next few years and not do child support. Or would the courts make me pay both. My ex is kind of threatening me if I don't go with the child support that the court will make me pay both.

You will have to do child support but will get a credit on the amount of nights you have children. Courts count nights. So if you are really doing a true 50/50 split then due to your salary being higher the courts want the children to have the same level of income in both houses. Go online to a child support calculator in your state and put in numbers and see what it comes out. You can also go see a lawyer for free or small fee for an hour and ask them to run the numbers. Spousal support may/may not be given since she is working and depends on the length on the marriage. Also spousal support usually has an end date on it (2 years, 5 years, until spouse has significant other living in house/next marriage). Do not sign anything until you talk to someone and run the child support numbers to see what you really should be paying and see if she is really making you a deal.

Thank you for the reply. Yes we are doing a true 50/50 split with the kids. I'll have to look into the calculator tonight. As far as spousal support. She is currently moving into her new boyfriends house. So not quite sure how that would work.

When I read Ocean's response....about the nights....that is very judge dependent and state dependent, it's not an automatic thing.

Spousal support is tax deductible income for you and taxable income for her.  Child support is not.

A judge is more than likely to award Child support regardless of your arrangement.

Spousal support?  haven't got a clue.

As for her moving in with someone -- totally totally irrelevant to the judge all the way around....particularly if you're divorced.  What would become relevant is if she said "I can't work now because I have a baby" -- then a judge should impute her income to what she's making now or minimum wage IF both incomes are used in your state.

Play with your state's calculator.  See what it asks for and what makes your obligation go up and down.

Health insurance factors in quite often.

Day care factors in quite often.

Extra curricular -- normally on the primary residential parent.  (note I didn't say primary parent....joint custody and 50/50 time, NO ONE is primary -- and the school will want a primary residential parent to determine school districts).

Tax breaks....what about that?

Medical co-pays, who pays that?

It sounds like she already talked to a lawyer who told her spousal support will be a lot harder to get if she is moving in with boyfriend. Judges dont care about that either of you is moving on but if she is moving in with someone to help with household bills then that decreases amount /if any now for spousal support. Go see a lawyer who can guide you at least for the hour so you know what the numbers could be if they went strictly by the numbers.  MB is right, you can also get credit for health insurance prem, copays, daycare. My state no longer splits extra curr activities on new orders.
Also do you have a holiday schedule (look at school calendars , they have long holiday weekends), birthday schedule for kids and you, and vacations (especially long school summer vacations). Check parenting plans on this site to make sure you covered everything (father's if on mothers week?, halloween..and all holidays).