SPARC Forums

Main Forums => Dear Socrateaser => Topic started by: DecentDad on Jun 16, 2005, 04:07:09 PM

Title: On longer term thinking
Post by: DecentDad on Jun 16, 2005, 04:07:09 PM
Ok, Soc, through all your guidance, all the fires have been extinguished that I've been able to extinguish.  Even though I lost the contempt motion on all 19 counts, plus lost a couple of the matters on my OSC, biomom seems to have found new energies to cooperate-- maybe she's tired of her legal bills.

So, now I'm just settling in for the ride for a while.

We had final orders of May 2004 (via stipulation), judgment entered Oct 2004.

Custody evaluator (730 that went 7 months) at that time recommended the current schedule to which we stipulated, and then he recommended final step-up to 50/50 schedule after child turns 6 (in 2006).

We have joint/joint per court ruling, though my current timeshare is 35%.

The stipulated final orders do not contain the 50/50 clause... no way biomom was going to agree to it, we would have had a full-blown trial (and biomom was trying for a move-away at that time, despite that evaluator said move-away would be bad for child).

Some things that will be happening after those final orders:

A) Child starts kindergarten this fall.

B) My wife and I are planning to have a child in 2006 (my daughter has no other siblings, and her only child-aged cousins are all on my side).  After the birth we're going to have a parent home at all times (flex schedules + reduced home budget for a couple years).  Daughter is excited to help take care of a baby, keeps asking stepmom (in her life since 2001) when baby will come since daughter says biomom doesn't want another baby.

C) In summer of 2006, each parent will get 3 consecutive weeks summer vacation (i.e., showing that child can handle significant time in either home).


1.  With the above scenario, particularly the evaluator's original recommendation to go to 50/50 in 2006; do you see any opportunity to modify visitation (not custody)?

2.  In modifying visitation, is the burden still to show "What's wrong with status quo" vs. showing "Yeah, I think that change would be good for the kid"?

3.  Short of biomom royally screwing up, any other approaches to have any decent shot at increasing custodial timeshare at some point?

Thanks,
DD
Title: RE: On longer term thinking
Post by: socrateaser on Jun 16, 2005, 04:56:23 PM
>1.  With the above scenario, particularly the evaluator's
>original recommendation to go to 50/50 in 2006; do you see any
>opportunity to modify visitation (not custody)?

It's not visitation (never use the word visitation, because it suggests that you are not a joint custodian). You exercise 35% custody as a secondary custodian of the children.

I think you can simply ask the court to increase your parenting time in 2006 on grounds that the evaulator believed it was in the child's best interests at the time of the eval, and no substantial change of circumstances have changed since that report was issued (assuming that no substantial cirumstances "have" changed, when the time comes).

>2.  In modifying visitation, is the burden still to show
>"What's wrong with status quo" vs. showing "Yeah, I think that
>change would be good for the kid"?

No, the burden is to show that it's in the child's best interests.

>3.  Short of biomom royally screwing up, any other approaches
>to have any decent shot at increasing custodial timeshare at
>some point?

Love your kid to death so she wants to live with you. Rare for a female child to want to live with Dad, but it could happen.