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Messages - gabes_mom

#1
I believe that you can get the jurisdiction of child support established in florida since you live there.  I would see about getting that changed asap
#2
Child Support Issues / Results....
Oct 19, 2006, 12:36:01 PM
Becky thanks for your help and all the info you gave me.  Yesterday afternoon we went to the appt at the CSEA and were told we don't have to provide health insurance for the kids.  So we are pleased.  We also set up a voluntary agreement to pay an addt'l amount of money to go towards the arrearages dh had accumulated when he lost his job a few months back.  thanks again for all your help!
#3
THank you so much for that advice!  I never thought about asking for the tax exemption of the kids, but it makes sense if she isn't working that he should be allowed to do this. (of course the judge can deny us this request but it's worth asking!)

THanks again!
#4
Okay so 50% of the responsibility is pretty much out of the question.

I have a question about this quote...
" Potential income may not be imputed to a parent who is physically or mentally incapacitated or is caring for a child who is under the age of three years and for whom child support is being determined."

The BM is currently pregnant (with the kids step father's baby not dh's) and will probably be staying home with this baby.  But if I'm reading this statement correctly we should still be able to have her income inputed because the baby she is having doesn't have anything to do with the child support to be determined.  Right?  The ages of the children dh has to pay child support for is 7 & 5.  


Please be patient with me I tend to get confused easily in regards to all this.  I want to make sure I completely understand it so I don't sound like a complete rearend when I quote our states law.  
#5
Thank you for that info and website.

I have one last question... She is intentionally working part time hours and can't provide insurance on the kids because of that, is there any way we can make it that she has to work full time and at least pull her 50% responsibility to the children?

If that question needs better clarification pls let me know.  
#6
Child Support Issues / Medical Support question..
Oct 10, 2006, 09:02:32 AM
State is North Carolina

Childrens ages SD 7 & SS 5 (if it matters)

There is a current child support order in place.

My question, we received a letter in the mail from the child support enforcement agency friday the 6th of October.  The letter is requesting the Bio Father (my husband) to meet with them to discuss medical support.  Now we used to have it included in our first set of calculations for support.  June of this year we went back for a decrease and were granted a 200$ decrease b/c my husband lost his job and then didn't make nearly as much money as before.  With the reduction we thought that the medical would have been included in the new calculations.  I guess they weren't since we received this letter asking for medical support.  So here we sit waiting on a call back from the case worker at the CSEA for this appt.  

The court order states that the BM's new husband would be putting the kids on his insurance at his job (this court order is 2 yrs old).  The new husband lost his job and I guess doesn't have insurance on the kids anymore.  Would the courts still enforce a court order even if the circumstances have changed?  

Another problem is DH recently started a new job, he makes much more money than he did at the job where he was working when he requested the decrease.  We are nervous they will ask about his new income because we fear an increase.  We are barely scrapeing by with the bills we have.  My DH won't even be eligible until November 25th for benefits.  What can we expect to happen now since he isn't eligible?  And what can we expect to happen once he becomes eligible?
#7
Yeah that is what soc was saying, However I unfortunately can not do that the money is seriously not there.  Here's my financial sittuation...

I'm 2 months behind on mortgage, 2 months behind on two vehicle payments, and my son's medicaid is going to run out this month and I'll have to be paying insurance to have health coverage on my family.  So my financial sittuation is so volatile that I'm in the sittuation where either I'm going to lose EVERYTHING or barely scrape by without having to file for bankruptcy.  Due to the divorce and the fact I had no lawyer I ended up having to pay all marital debt which is in the process of being charged off, because I have not money to pay the debt, no money to get a lawyer to redistribute the marital debt (not even sure that would be an option) and no money to file for bankruptcy.  This places me where I can't get credit cards. I by no means live beyond my financial capacity.  Unfortunately I lost my job a few months back, got behind on child support and my bills.  It took too long to find a job and now I've been playing catch up to get back to being financially stable.

I'm not trying to make excuses just give all facts.
#8

>If your ex can get a doctor's note stating that travel will
>endanger the health of mother or child, then she will not be
>in willful and conscious disregard of the court orders by not
>meeting in VA.
>
>So, if you want to see your kids, then my advice is for you to
>pay the cost of transport, even if this means hiring a limo or
>putting them on a plane. Then, ask the court to order
>reimbursement from the other parent. You can file your request
>now, even though the contempt hasn't taken place yet, based
>upon your ex's statements that she won't bring the kids or pay
>half the cost to send them. So, you make all the arrangements,
>pay the cost, and then file for the reimbursement.
>
>The combination of your ex's refusal to pay and your actually
>paying is sufficient to show that you detrimentally relied on
>your ex's prior statements, and that she has been unjustly
>benefited by not having to pay for transportation, and that
>you sufferred the expense which she should have born.
>
>It's pretty much open and shut. So, pull out your credit card
>and pay for the kids. You should get your attorney fees,
>interest expense, etc., all reimbursed.
>
>I don't know what you sent in your "letter" to exercise
>custody, but you should have sent a letter stating to the
>effect that "As you have indicated that you will neither bring
>the kids to the meeting point or pay the cost of their
>transportation, I have made the following travel arrangements
>and I will expect reimbursement from you. I don't wish to make
>this an adversarial situation, however, if you refuse to
>reimburse me for the transportation arrangements, I will have
>no choice but to take appropriate legal action to recover my
>costs."
>


So my approach was incorrect from the beginning.  With this new knowledge, this is what I sent in my letter:

"Re: Notice of intent to exercise visitation.

As per our custody order I am writing you to notify you that it is my intention to exercise court ordered visitation, as outlined in the court order, page 5, section D, paragraph 1, on the following dates and times.

Pick up: Wednesday, November 22, 2006 at 2pm
Pick up place: Blank VA
Return: Sunday, November 26, 2006 at 2pm
Return place:  Blank, VA
Contact Information:

I understand that you are pregnant and due to have a C-Section December 7, 2006.  I also understand that you may not want to travel at said times above, however, that doesn't negate your responsibility to provide transportation under the order.  You have known for nine months that this was going to be a problem and therefore have had ample time to make other transportation arrangements.  Any deviation from the court order will be seen as a denial of visitation."

   According to your info above this letter isn't going to do me any good in a case against her because this isn't a winable case. I don't have a credit card and unfortunately have horrible credit, I will surely not be given a card in enough time to get my kids this thanksgiving. So basically my ex will get one over on me again.  THank you for your advice though  
#9
I am the NCP and reside in NC, CP and children reside in PA, Deisgnated meeting spot is VA.  NC holds jurisdiction over case.

Holiday Visitation Guidelines:

Thanksgiving= even number years children are to be with the NCP from 2pm on the day before Thanksgiving until 2pm on the day before school reconvenes.

Christmas= every year children are to be with the NCP from 2pm on December 26th until 2pm on the day before school reconvenes.

NCP and CP are to meet at designated meeting spot on above days at above times.

My problem is the CP is pregnant and has a C-Section Scheduled for Dec. 7th.  She has informed me that she won't be meeting me in VA for the Thanksgiving or Christmas visitation times.  Her reasoning was it isn't safe for her to travel during Thanksgiving and her doctor has adviced her not to do anything for 4 weeks after the baby (which is by her new husband not me) is born which blocks out Christmas as well.

She has told me that if I want to see my kids I could drive up to PA both holidays and get them and bring them back to PA at the end of the allowed visitation times.  I have suggested that since she is obligated per the court order to provide transportation for the children that maybe the children's new step father will step up and carry out her obligation.  She has told me that wouldn't be happening because her husband had to work.  

After this conversation last night with my ex (half of this conversation was recorded on my answering machine)we are still at an impass.  I can not financially make the trip to PA (and even if I could she has already said that she would not be willing to pay for half of the expenses).

The letter of intent to exercise court ordered visitation has been mailed out today certified and a copy has been sent to the court clerk to be placed in the court file.

Questions:

1) Since my ex has told me that she won't be meeting me in VA (I have this recorded as proof) Do I still have to make the trip to VA?

2)When can I file for contempt of court? Does it have to wait until after the date we are supposed to meet?

3) Since half of the conversation was recorded on the answering machine and you can hear me state this, I should be safe with the laws in both states about recording someone right?  If not which states law would be upheld?

4) At what point do I send the Denial of Visitation Letter?

5) Since my ex was recorded while saying she won't be meeting me for Christmas visitation when should I file for contempt of court for denial of my Christmas visitation?  Could this matter be handled at the same time as this Thanksgiving issue?

Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks
#10
Thank you very much! I was hoping that myself and my children wouldn't be forced to miss out on seeing one another because she is having a baby.  I think that indeed it would be easier to send her the letter of intent and go from there.