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http://www.ssa.gov/pubs/10084.html

http://www.pueblo.gsa.gov/cic_text/fed_prog/socsecbf/socsecbf.html
(Excerpt)"The average monthly payment for a family consisting of a widow(er) with two children is $1,696 per month. Social Security payments increase based on the annual cost-of-living index-- something few private insurance plans offer. "
"Today, Social Security pays monthly survivors benefits to about 7 million Americans, almost 2 million of whom are children. "

"Under Social Security, workers are considered disabled if they cannot do work they did before and we decide that they cannot adjust to other work because of their medical condition(s). The disability must be expected to last for at least 12 months or to result in death. Once benefits begin, they continue for as long as the worker is disabled and can't work. The disabled worker and his or her eligible family members receive checks each month. "

Granted, getting diability benefits from SSA can be a challenge, but I just wanted to point out that these benefits DO exist, which the original poster seemed to not be aware of.

Social Security provides funds to minor children whose parent is deceased or deemed disabled.  I know I would have far more $$$ if XH were to die or be deemed disabled by SSA than is received in child support.

set up a separate savings account so you will have the money ready when you need to pay.

Also look up the guidelines for MA, so you have an idea of what you will be ordered to pay.

because my understanding is that anything you give her from at least the date she filed, if not the DOB, will be considered a "gift" and it will not count as a credit.

Did you keep notes from your conversation with DOR?  If so, you can give her the name/number of the person she spoke to.  Perhaps she can also provide you with name/direct number of the person she spoke with.

I'm supposed to complete a financial fact sheet for Child Support Enforcement in Wisconsin and list my income, expenses and assets. I'm also supposed to submit tax returns which is easy this time because of being single previous tax years.  (I remarried in March)

DH and I have one joint checking and a joint savings. DH earns almost 2x what I do, so splitting expenses down the middle wouldn't work. Some debts are exclusively mine- my car, my credit card debt, my student loan. Should I give facts and figures based on my budget from my single days? How do I figure in the house stuff?

Background: DH has no children.  XH and I have one son.  All along I have asked for 1/2 of daycare and 1/2 of uninsured med and insurance, which has always been less than the 17% in WI.

TIA guys!

Gidget

for stipulations that we put for to the court.

I gave a VIS on behalf of my son about 6 months ago (OWI case).  I did have help from a friend who had to do a VIS for her skids whose mom tried to kill them via pills.  I received many comments from MADD, the victim assistance coordinator and the assistant DA who thought it was well done and focus on the victim's impact and not as a "he should pay" vendetta.

I can email you the statement as the details are too personal to post publically.  ([email protected])

Also, while MADD deals only with drunk driving adn the impact of it for their VIS, they do give good food for thought and a place to start from.
http://www.madd.org/victims/0,1056,7068,00.html
http://members.tripod.com/elkcountycapsea/victim%20impact%20statements.htm  (more details)

But use your victim assistance coordinator and/or any community resources you have used- perhaps your child's therapist, rape crisis center, etc.  I'm sure they will all be very helpful as well and can give you an objective view that is still aware of specific points that should be emphasized.

For those who are interested in this topic:

http://www.abanet.org/legalservices/lamp/cle/childcustody-part1.pdf

the original court maintain jurisdiction, then that holds until BOTH parties agree to have it changed.

My divorce decree has that language and even though XH nd I not longer live in that jurisdiction, we have all court matters handle through that court system.

http://forums.firehouse.com/archive/index.php/t-21579.html


http://www.robertgradel.com/mediation/mediation_strategies_resolving_child_custody.htm
Suggested alternative possession orders.
Is one parent an airline employee, in law enforcement, fire fighter or other job working non-standard hours? Does either side have a significant amount of free time to take the kids to ball games and such? If so, modifying the SPO to fit the parties situation could seal the deal.
Here are some ideas for possession orders that are alternatives to SPO visitation:
Split custody - Alternating months
Child spends January, March, May, July, September, November with one parent, then February, April, June, August, October and December with the other. SPO visitation with the non-custodial parent.
Split custody - 2-2-5-5
Begin with Monday, Tuesday for Mom, then, Wednesday, Thursday for Dad, then Fri, Sat, Sun, Mon, Tues for Mom, then Wed, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun for Dad. Then start over.
Split custody - alternating years
Non-custodial parent gets SPO visitation while the custodial parent has primary.
Split custody - Alternating weeks
Friday to Friday at 6:00 p.m., SPO visitation for holidays, each party may designate one weekend in the summer for their vacation period (thus giving the parent 10 consecutive days with the children).
Split custody - split year
Each parent has custody for six months, with SPO visitation for the non-custodial parent. This will generally work best for kids under 5.
Split custody - One parent has school year, the other parent the summer.
If mom raises children during the school year, dad will have SPO visitation during that period. Mom will have one 7 day period during dad's 3 month summer period, with notice by April 1.