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Messages - JTR Dad

#1
Thank you for sharing a positive example.

Regarding the charges against the BM, my husband was told, by the sheriff's office, that her part in this would be pursued by the State's Atty, and they would determine if charges could be filed. He was also told that if he reported it as a crime separate from the stepfather's case, that it could slow down the whole process.

I would think that the daughter's age and testimony would be significant as far as evidence goes. DH told me today that the daughter told the BM each time an incident occurred and each time the BM would assure her she'd take care of it and yet did not. A 16 year old, level-headed child offering that information seems like evidence to me. The child is not boiling over with anger at her mother, she's confused and disappointed that her mother continues to lie and support this man who hurt her.  
#2
>>
>Is DCF/CPS involved ?  I don't know.
>
>What authority placed the child in the grandmother's home ? A counselor was assigned to the case, provided by the county, after the arrest. Upon learning that the BM was lying to the counselor and making the daughter lie as well, she advised that the child be removed immediately. The grandmother was the most logical choice.
>
>Does the child use drugs or display any irrational behavior
>traits that can currently be traced to the abuse allegations
>? I do not believe so.
>
>>
>btw Is it possible that any portion of child support monies
>provided the bail money ?? We had just sent 3 months worth of support at around that time. Does it make a difference?   >

One child is over 18 and out of the house. The child in this matter is 16. I mention the "kids" collectively only because the BM is trying to get both of them to see things her way.

With all due respect, my husband and I are not able to accept the possibility that his daughter may end up living in this situation again. She is 16, which should have considerable weight in court, and has expressed to her Dad that she has no desire to ever live with her mother again. There is nothing about my husband that would cause the court to doubt him being a far more than "fit" parent. The only wrinkle is our location which we will have corrected in about 6 weeks we estimate.

With that information, are we being reasonable in our assumption that my husband's daughter will end up with us?

 
#3
Thank you for the info. My husband had a chance to read your advice before he left to go to his daughter. I told him I'd keep an eye on this msg for him.

We were surprised by something we were told today and while he intends to pursue it further, if you know of any similar case please let me know...My husband was told that charges could not be brought against his ex-wife. The Asst. State's Atty told him this.

The ex knew what was going on and not only didn't report it, she told her daughter not to tell either.
 
#4
General Issues / Abuse in custodial parents home.
Apr 18, 2007, 11:37:18 PM
I'm a non-custodial parent, w/ joint custody, living in a different state. I learned a few hours ago that my daughter's step-father has been abusing her. It began two years ago and my ex knew about it. My daughter (16) confided in a friend a month ago who steered her to the authorities. The step-father turned himself in and made bail all in the same night. The ex has been telling the kids to keep it quiet because she can't make it without his financial contribution, she had an argument with the kids about this as recently as 2 days ago. My daughter is currently with my mother a few miles away from my ex. I'm hundreds of miles away. What do I do right now? Relocating back to that area quickly is an option.