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Messages - Lollipoppa

#1
I have the affidavit of parentage stating that I am the father, is that what you are stating by seeking paternity?

I've been to the police department an handful of times with my daughter usually after a blow out situation when she goes psycho.  I had also asked them about what to do with her since she says this so often.  By saying that, I mean, she says it 10-20 times a week, I asked the officer seriously now.  She's been saying this so much for so long, wouldn't I look like an idiot calling 911 3-4 times a day?  Its almost the same as crying wolf. Although I know that if I called 911 again when she starts going crazy, the backlash would be hellish at the house as I'm still getting it from Easter when she went crazy and I did call them.   
#2
Father's Issues / Re: new & looking for input
Oct 09, 2009, 11:35:43 AM
I am the father, child is still here, as well as the mother. 
paternity is established, my name is on the BC, although that doesn't count for much. 
I spend a lot more time with the child then the mother, I do a lot more of the required work for the child then the mother.  Diapers, making food, breakfast, lunch, dinner, getting dressed, bathing, taking and picking up from daycare, taking to park, to play, etc...

Mother has not filed anything, doesn't know I am going this far, so trying to learn what I can and then go for it, once it starts, things are going to get very ugly here. 
#3
wow, I had no idea that there were any responses posted after checking back a couple of times.  Thank you for that!

I have a log kept since the beginning of this year, and other notes of crazy things that she has done/does.  Daily notes though for the most part, its very tough to keep up sometimes, and other times I stray from making an entry because every time I open the file, I relive the experience.  I know it is necessary to document though, so I do it often. 

The older daughter of hers has since moved on to college, and doesn't come home very often.  I believe its to stay out of harms way and not have to deal with the domestic stuff occurring here. 

Someone mentioned recordings, and while I have thought of this, I also see it as being somewhat biased.  Since I know there would be a recording device, one would think I'd try to bait her in, its not necessary but easily understood why someone could think this.  Hiding a recording device in the house is going to be tough, and if it is found, its a give away...

My name in on the birth certificate, but as mentioned also, I don't really think that means too much.  I've spoken to an attorney and think he is pretty straight, speaks english and listens to me, not pushy or makes me uncomfortable.  I should see another just for comparison, I've called a few and talked, but they were definitely different then this guy. 
#4
Father's Issues / new & looking for input
Jul 20, 2009, 01:31:11 PM

Hello:


I just finally signed into this list to try & get some information. As probably many others here, I'm in a bad situation right now that I am trying to figure out how to get out of.


Not married, have one child that is about 19 months old, and a relationship that has failed about 1 yr ago. From the information that I have gathered already, my next step


is to find an attorney. I want to keep my child in my house and be the primary caretaker! It seems like everyone I've talked to about this so far tells me its just about impossible,
so I'm trying to figure out how to change that, or hear something different. Living in fear and being taken advantage of is making me sick, and wearing me down, so I need out.


I'm located in Oakland county, SE Michigan if it makes any difference. Looking for advice, info or support groups, and somewhere I can get some questions answered.


My fear is starting something, and ending up losing the child to a violent mother, and have her ending up the same as her, her older daughter from another failed marriage.

#5
I'm looking for info or help with trying to "start the procedure".
I've been in a relationship for about 4.5 yrs, and the past 1yr has been total hell, the rest has not been all that much better either.
Together we have a 19month old daughter that I want to have primary custody of.
We are not married, however she lives in my home with her older daughter, 18 that she also went through the same process with 17 yrs ago. Married, have baby, then divorced. I never went far enough to get married, and its probably a good thing because there are some serious responsibility/money/mental issues.

Since they are in my home, I can't just simply say get out. Her car, her daughters car, every bill, every responsibility is in my name.
I need to know how to gain custody of my child and keep her with me. Since I am the dad I'm already down 2 strikes.

What are the determining factors of how these decisions are made? Since she has been through this before, she thinks she is a pro.
She has no credit, and in debt easily $100k, has no car without the car I've got for her, has no strings really, and for having a salary that is = to mine she should have something to show for it, but there is nothing.
She threatens me daily that she will leave, take the baby and I'll never see her again, threatens that she will kill herself daily, tons of other issues.

I've already been the primary care taker of the baby, have been for a while. However I know that she will think that she is the make care taker for the baby.
Dressing her, feeding her, drive to day care, pick up from daycare, feed dinner, making lunch, bathing, diapers, playing with her, just to name a few.
She is very jealous that I have such a loving relationship with my daughter, I'm not saying that she does not love the child, but she doesn't make any effort to spend
much time with her, or do any of the necessary things having a child requires.

I'm not sure where to turn, all I hear is bad bad bad about trying to go through these situations. I'm tired of being abused, taken advantage of and used, so I need to
figure out how to go through with this and keep my child so there is not another carbon copy of her mother and sister.

Anyone?