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Review- I am domcile parent with mother having visitation.Mother moved to another state with BF and the child that she had with him. daughter has lived with me since last febuary. Started school this year and is doing great. We were supposed to goback and modifiy the visitation. well all was quite until we found out that she is prego again. (not married) She was a little upset that we found out. LOL Yea face book   . court date is dec 8th now she has decided to move back and get her old job back that she said told her to move . Now she wants shared custody. She dose pay child support right now . My question is am I going to lose my child? What should I ask for and expect. Right now I have her in the best school in the area A+++ rating and keep up with all her activitys. I live in the state of Louisana. She was held in contempt of court last time and she has a few contempt of court this time. I have kept every record times and dates of every day that I have had her. Please give input.

After the meeting yesterday and me asking all the hopfully right questions , I feel a little better.

One of the things that I found out was that her att did not consult her on getting thisng cont. She was really upset. LOL The things that she said she had for proof of why she move was a joke. LOL The emails from her att to mine were quite confusing. Even for my att.  He said that he had to stop reading the emails due to the fact that her att was jumping around from one subject to another.

Now what I have to do is prove that the reason she moved was not because they did not have a postion here but to be with her BF . We have documentation that she applied everywhere her BF was and not here in our own state. These documents are from her employer. I pointed out that all the places were so connected with BF.

Our next court date is Feb 4th so I have some extra time.  If I can prove that she moved not in good faith I have a better shot of keeping things the way they are. I was told that she will have to pay all my expenses for the att. Can any one tell me how that works?

He gave several different things to think about. If I accept here propsal which would give me more time now until she starts scool in 2011. But then I would have to go back and redo the agreement then.

Go to trial and hope the judge see things in my favor. This jude is a 50-50 man.

Make a propsal myself a fair one he stated. LOL

Or find out the info about about the move.  Then the could talk to the other att and say-----

He made a couple of statements that got me to thinking which was she has not been totally honest with her situtation with her att. Maybe her att thinks she dosenot have a leg to stand on. This att dose not like to work hard and wants easy wins.  He is (her att) as a laughing stock in the comm. He was asked to leave the bench when he was a judge.

Thank you for all the good advise I was given in early post.


JA   

I am going to the att office tomorrow with a list of questions-

1  Can I get a home study done on BM - I would like to know the living arragements

2 Chacerter of BM boyfriend    I have a feeling it is not good

3 I found out that child is sleeping in a room with  BM BF and baby brother

4 can i ask that the daycare she  might be attending be as good if not better than she I have put her in now

5 point out that with this move I can not be the father I would like to be

6 Lack of income on her part to give her the things that she needs

If there is any other questions that anyone can think of please let me know. I want to go in and be prepared to the max


Jason

As I stated before I got them to postpone my court date until after the holidays. I feel that I am losing. I have done everything except murder. Kept records pictures notes and put her in the best preschool daycare that I can find.

I have been told that since she has a brother (by another man) that I may have to give her up. I have done some research and it seems like I run into a brick wall with the proof thing. My daughter is sleeping in the same room as the bf and ex and brother. The house has 3 other children and two other adults. Mother is filling her heard with all kinds of things and it pains me that an adult would stoop that low to do that to a child.

I have never seen the bf nor will she allow me to at least see the outside of the home she is staying in. I can not met the day care person. (at home ) It has been rumored that the bf got fired from his manger job and she almost lost her job for the same reason.

The hardest thing for me is to let go I JUST WANT A FAIR SHOT at being a dad. I realize that life is not fair but come on I have to have some luck somewhere. I am thinking about asking for a home study done on her what do you think? What elese can I do. Or am I just out of luck?


Jason

After a stressful night and day . I got the court to postpone our court date till after the holidays. Yea Me!!!!
I am hoping that is a good sign . Giving me more time to get more stuff together.

I contacted a PI and had decided to hire hime. He gave me some interesting info giving me food for thought. Has any one dealt with a PI and what do I look for. How much is his investagaion will be admissable in court?

I am hoping the longer I keep my child the better it is for me.

You talk about one happy camper right now. 


Thanks Jason   

Yesterday was called in to the attorneys office since court date is thursday. There was a proposal made and I do not agree totoly with it . As you no ex moved with out permission and I was grated temp custody. Have had it for several months. 

She wants every other week till child starts school. Then we can go back to court to settle things again. I would have to drive 4 hours to pick her up not a problem will do. Then bring her back. I was wonderin if I could ask to a contenince sine this was so short notice for me?  I can still go to court on thursday and see what happens but then I will not have many options. 

I am thinking about hiring a PI because some of the statements made by ex is not true and we have no way of proving it with out the PI. She will not give any info on anything as far as preschool ,living arrgangents ect. 

They are using the illegimate child she has as a factor.


Help soon

Jason   Sorry about the spelling in a hurry and stressed

I wrote early this morning in regards to my court date coming up . I appericate all the kind words that were given and any prayers that were said.

Well with a week till the court date the games have begun. I took my little girl to Daycare/Preschool  and recived a call a short time latter informing me that they had been supenaed . I am thinking what for? They want records of payment and registration, any accidents and who drops her off and picks her up. She is question weather this Class A daycare/preschool is really a school is really a preschool or not. Jokes on her because I talked to the director and she will be happy to write a paper with all the information on it. I have never missed a payment nor do I let anyone except my parents pick her up. Not even my girlfriend whom I have been with for quite some time.

About a week ago ex was video taping the school which that is fine. And is upset that she can not just walk in . Secure with cameras and a code to get in.   The few times that she has been in it has been with my approval and she is not there but a minute or two.   

Called my  attorney and we have a meeting the day before the court date. I wish it was sooner to ease my mind. But I am assume and of course we all no what that word could stand for.,That we are in good shape.

I have been keeping my journal and all papers from the school and have pic of events that we have been doing. I am ready for anything from a drug test to what ever hits me I think. 

I hate the thought of loosing my little girl and since she has been with me I have tried to give her all the important things that I know off. I do know that when I bring up her mothers name or ask her about did she have a good time with mom she clams up and says she is tried. That dose concern me allot and I hope that it is not becoming to stressfull for her. Today when I picked her up I hugged her so hard that I thought that I hurt her. You  can not imagine how a child can affect your life until you have one. I have turned myself totally around to the point I do not smoke or drink anymore and my child like ways are in the past. I have never prayed as hard for anything as I have for keeping her in my life. To all the people out there stay strong and fight for the little ones no matter what.

I want to thank the poster who sent me the email. Well we are down to count down and I am becoming more stressed. But I am sure allot of you have been in my shoes.

There has not been a aord in the other camp. I spoke to my att and he stated that everything looks good. I have done everything asked of me in order to keep my little girl. Mother still has not moved back nor has she done a thing to help her situtation. I have had temp custody for three months and we have gotten a rountine down and document everything.

I have prayed and prayed that this will go in my favor. But I also realize that things could go her way. Everyone tells me that since I got temp custody so fast that I have a good shot at keeping her. I hope that they are right .

Please offer any advise to help with the stress or last minute ideas of things that will help . Maybe something that I have forgotten.


Thanks Jason 

Yes but believe me she was not happy.

First I want to thank everyone this board is a wealth of info. In two weeks we go to court right now I have temp custody and things are going well with me and my little girl. 
Have not heard a thing from my att and I guess I am getting a little frazzled. I did leave a message to call me . I have done everything plus anything that I can think of to help my case.

As far as I know I have seen nothing on the other side nor has she changed anything . Of course as it gets closer I find her trying to pull more and more out of her hat and with all my might I try not to listen.

Is ther any pointers anyone can give me to prepare. I am in knots over this and do not want to miss anything. I have done jounrals and kept records of everything. Great daycare/pre school .

How dose a person prepare. I am hoping for the best because I got temp custody to begin with. But I understand it could go the other way.


Thanks Jason