Messages

Sorry for the extended absence.   Things have changed.  She has retained a lawyer who sent me a letter indicating that she is filing for divorce.  I've requested to put a parenting plan into affect but her response (Via phone, never in written format) is "I will get a protection order and petition for full custody."   She does still allow our children to call me nightly but I'm considering not doing that anymore because both children tell me they feel like crying because they do not see me enough(She left on 07/17 and I've only seen our children twice).  I also believe she is listening to the calls and coaching our children's responses.   I really appreciate all the advise I've been given and feel like a coward for not pushing for more time. 

These may not be a questions that someone could answer but here goes.     

Do I push for more visits along with overnights and risk that she will get some type of protection order as well as full custody?

Do I stop or reduce the the before bed calls (this is the only time she will allow them to call me) to talk to them and make sure they know that I love them?

Am I in fact a coward for not advocating for more time for our children given the threats she has made?

The kids already went to school in the same town she moved to.  She is a teacher there so they went to school there anyway.  She moved about 20 minutes away.  We never had any joint accounts, i covered all the bills related to the house (mortgage, utilities ect.

As far as getting a lawyer, due to the fact that i was the one paying for just about everything, there is no way for me to retain one.  In all honesty due to my work schedule i have to admit they are better off woth Mom at the moment.  She does a summer program and is out of work around 2pm and able to P/U the kids from the day program thsy attend.  I also drive a pick-up with bucket seats so transporting them is no5 easy.  I have lined up alternative transportation through friends should she allow me the chance to have our children for the day or overnight.  All in all my only real chance 8s to give her the space of she requires and hope for the best.  I will not allow our children to surrer if at all possible.   Right now it's about minimizing the impact on them.    I am documenting everything regarding my requests for info on MD appt, day programs, health issues and the actual address that they currently life.  So far she is unwilling to provide any of it.  All communication is done VIA email and i BCC 2 third parties.    Am I xoing the right things with what i have to work with?

I'm not sure if reconciliation  is possible.  I asked to see the kids yesterday and she denied me.  She is staying with her parents as far as i know.  She said it was in there best intrest to not see me right now.  She took everything that belongs to the kids.  All clothes, toys eating utensils, plates and cups along with all her stuff.  She went so far as to take the shower curtain.  I spoke to both kids before bed and my son ( said he did not know why all there stuff is at Grams and said that he wants to come home.  My daughter (6) said she cried when Mom said "we are living at Gram's from now on and you won't be seeing  Daddy for a while".  That almost destroyed me.  My thoughts regarding reconciliation are pretty grim. 

I came home from work yesterday and my wife had moved out with our children.  She took some furniture and all the kids toys and clothes.  She did not leave me any information about where she was going to be staying (i suspect it's with her parents).  I live in Massachusetts and was wondering if anyone has any advice on what my next step should be.  We are not legally separated but have been going through a very rough patch.  Am i legally allowed to request to be able to see our children?  If I have not included enough detail please feel free to ask for clarification.  Thank you.