Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Topics - ArkStepMom

#1
Dear Socrateaser / Ad Litem/Attorney
Oct 28, 2006, 07:55:05 AM
Dad petitioning court for custody from mom over general neglect, physically restraining child to keep  child from scratching at chronic bug bites requiring ER and heavy medications, general instabilty (home life, school), the list goes on and on.
Anyway long story short, after 3 years of waiting for hearing finally make it to court and never see the inside of it  AGAIN (thats the third time negotiations took place on a hallway bench!) and custody won't change
Dad requests GAL report from attorney,  attorney claims there isn't one, "that they don't do that anymore"
Dad suspects Judge may never have heard alligations, seen pict's, watched the DVD at all, but mearly jumped off of GAL's recommendation sight unseen, no explaination.
1) Is it common practice for the Judge not to know why GAL's make the recommendations they do?
2)Is it possible and/or legal in the state of Arkansas for there to be no paper record of the GAL's evaluation?

Thanks in advance
ArkStepMom
#2
Dear Socrateaser / Ad Litem Interogatories help
Aug 07, 2005, 09:39:07 AM
We (NCP) have had our first Ad Litem meeting  and have been furnished with her Interogartories- 12 questions in all and we are having some difficulty keeping answers "succinctly" formatted!! The last 2 questions ask "...state succinctly the reasons you feel you are the best parent to have custody..." and "...states succinctly the reasons you feel the opposing party is not the best person to have custody..."

at issue for NCP are 1) Child's 5 years of recurrence of excessive bug bites gone unresolved and supported by Dr visits and prescriptions
                 2) Child's teachers' request for child to be seen by Dr-> the subsequent referal to Child Psych. and the abscence of follow up
                 3) Child handcuffed to bed to prevent her from scratching at bites
                 4) Child's 4 school moves from K through grade 2
                 5) CP's Numerous residences with child since 1998 divorce with an undetermined number of male companions whom she was not married to
                 6) Fights both physical and verbal witnessed by child between CP's current spouse, spouses ex, and various unknown persons
                 7) Frustration of visitation with tardiness and visitation denials
                 8) Child's living conditions-3 bdrm home for family of 6 with child sharing one bedroom with two other children and childs concerns of having nothing of her own ex: clothes, space, bed
                 9) Child(8) being furnished with intimate knowledge of court order and stips and governing herself while away from CP's home

of the issues for CP most are unknown but it is presumed that 2 contempts, both occuring in 2 seperate summers involving child being taken out of state for vacation during CP's visitation and we expect Cp will bring issue with lack of telephone contact with child on NCP's parenting time which there is no stip in order for ( NCP's itemized tele. bills can prove otherwise)

Q1) With all NCP's concerns how should they be summarized without making NCP sound like he's anti-CP to the Ad Litem?

Q2) Aside from "NCP provides child with Happy, Healthy, Stable and Nurturing home" is there anything else that should be adressed in why NCP should have custody?


#3
We have been battling (mostly with our Atty) for a custody reversal  for over a year now and finally, but not without pushing, set an appointment with the Ad Litem 4 hours away at the Ad Litem's office, with less then a days notice!
Our concerns for child are 19+ residences for the 8 y/o , emotional instability, visitation denial exploiting a stip in the order giving CP discretion to withhold visitation if a "Dr' excuse" is issued, neglect on the basis of the almost always child has come for visitation with 100's of bug bites/lice or Impetigo,  domestic agression (some physical) issues between CP and her husband, his children and his ex-wife.

1) What is important to bring to this initially meeting with the Ad Litem (child has not been invited)
2) Any morsal of advise is appreciated?

Thank you in advance
#4
Dear Socrateaser / Church vs no Church re GAL
Apr 20, 2005, 04:11:24 AM
Morning Soc;

Oour hearing on April 11 was continued b/c of BM last minute hire of an attorney.  We are waiting on a new hearing date but in the mean time have some insight as to how opposing intends to counter our motion for custody mod (reversal).  Most of our claims pertain to stability and child neglect.  BM has attended church since notice and has even scheduled 8y/o daughter for Baptism. Given BM history of frivilous behaviour we expect this to stop after hearing! We expect that among other items, that BM will bring issue with our not attending church. We have Child every 1st and third weekend 7 Friday - 7 Sunday. We meet 2 hours away at a half way point.
BM, anticipating Ad Litem interview, has begun overhauling her world ie: BM w/child have moved, temporarily to her brothers while they paint their entire house, among other things

1) How do you feel an Ad Litem will react to this church vs no-church issue?
2) Would these modifications at the BM house, with interview pending, play a roll in Ad Litem report?

Thanks Soc
#5
Dear Socrateaser / Childs bank account
Feb 23, 2005, 05:15:01 AM
Soc;
I am the wife of NCP father and opened a savings account for my step-daughter with a modest inheritance given to her by her great grandmother.  The account bears both my SD and my name but not NCP fathers.  I am concerned that if/when CP mother gains knowledge of this account that she will have some claim to it.  Neither CP or step-daughter know that there is an account for her.

1) Would CP have any rights to these funds?
2) Is there some loop hole to safeguard these funds from CP.

Thanks for your help, once again!! :)
#6
Dear Socrateaser / Attorney strategy
Feb 05, 2005, 06:19:15 AM
Soc;

We have had 2 attorneys, both on the same issue (at seperate times) of Custody Modification.  The first attorney filed, opposing was served interogatories then had 20 days to respond.  Our current attorney filed (in August), opposing was served (in January).  Opposing was served with notice of hearing only (for April), no option to respond.

1) What can you tell us about these differences

Thanks Soc
#7
Dear Socrateaser / Attorney from hell!
Nov 16, 2004, 04:17:13 PM
Soc:
We have had our attorney retained since July, at which time we stated the details of our case, our claims and evidence.  We requested an emergency temporary order & mod of custody.  She agreed to conduct business over the phone as necessary as jurisdiction (as well as Attorney) are in a county 4 hours from ours
Since July we have requested over and over for the status of our case etc and since July she has accepted 1 phone call (which may have been a mistake). She has responded 3 times by email to our requests for information about the status of our case, usually answering with an excuse as to why she's not been in contact (ei: her mother was sick, she's been in court and she's 'been busy'!)
Now given that she is holding our retained and not forwarded reciept or any paper communication, beit bill or otherwise.  At this piont we can't even get her to answer as to whether BM has been served.
On October 2 she responded to email stating that we should have a court date "today", and haven't heard from her nor been able to reach her, we can't even figure out what the hearing would be for at this piont!!!

This would make our 2nd Attorney from hell.  My 7 y/o stepdaughter is stuck in an unsave environment and we're stuck with an atty who only spoke to us to take our payment details!  All our cards are max'd and the last of our funds went to the atty

What can you suggest?
#8
Dear Socrateaser / Jurisdiction
Oct 22, 2004, 02:33:08 AM
Soc, I have a friend who is unable to register and she has asked me to pose this question:

Child concieved in Arkansas, born in Oklahoma, and parents divorce is in Arkansas.

Father brought custody case and mother is attempting to have this case dismissed on grounds that he filed in the wrong state, since child was born in Oklahoma

1) Where is the correct jurisdiction in the situation?
#9
Dear Socrateaser / Claims of harassment
Oct 17, 2004, 09:58:03 AM
Soc;
We have an issue with CP constantly claiming NCP is harassing her.  Her claims are based on any inquiry regarding child (ie: illness)all recorded.  She will request NCP call her at work to discuss child or relative matters and shriek " don't harass me at work" also recorded.  Any denied visitation is followed up with a letter from NCP advising of our intention to submit the withheld visitation for contempt, sent cert, rr.  These letters are very generic, state the AO stipulation, why it will be submitted for consideration as contempt.  She claims this also to be harassment.
CP has trumped up semi-physical harassment claims as well.  She hasn't devulged to NCP she has suffered any actual physical contact from him but states NCP was "in her face" (which is actually false, StepNCP there as witness) and there are no RO's that we know of . Because of this semi physical "threat"  she claims she must bring her husband as witness,  consequently this makes her late to exchange child at visitations! Yet sometimes will drive alone.
We do know thjat there has been at least one altercation between CP and her husbands ex. (The she fight had somebodies head being slammed off the hood of a car!!)

We feel that this will be brought forward at some piont during our case, exagerated(sp?) I'm sure.  We'd hate to shoot ourselves in the foot, we'd rather present ourselves with pristene halo's!

1) Is there something that we should be doing as damage control?
2) Invalidate her claims?
2) Anything else you can add is appreciated?

Thank you in advance
#10
Hi Soc;

In Arkansas, where we are a 'one party state'. We have recorded BM's communications over the phone with us for several years now and have pain stakingly transcribed it all to paper, verbatim.

Q1) Are these communications admissable in court?

if not/so

Q2) What can be doen to ensure the judge believes the conversion to be accurate? Notary?
#11
Dear Socrateaser / duration after filing
Sep 12, 2004, 04:35:26 PM
Soc,
Once a Custody Mod/Contempt motion is filed with the court house, what time frame or constraints are there before proceeding with the intended action??
#12
Dear Socrateaser / Emerg Temp Custody
Aug 03, 2004, 04:46:15 PM
How long SHOULD it take after emergency temporary custody is requested?

Thanks
#13
Soc, you may remember the bug bite/handcuff  issue of my SD. We have interviewed atty's and have made a decision but have not yet hired her. It is likely that come July 1 (or whenever BM lets us get "child") that we will move for emerg temp custody. The atty tells us it may be as late as Sept for the hearing which comes after school begins. If this hearing does takes place after school begins, it would mean "child" will begin Grade 2 at her 5th school.
BM inability/refusal to provide "child" with a stable lifestyle will be one of the issues brought to hearing. (20 residences in 6 years, 4 schools grades K through 1, 2 husbands, since divorse from NCP and unknown # of short term cohabiting boyfriends ALTHOUGH since last Order, 1 on again off again new husband, 4 schools, 2 provable places of residence

1) Is it reasonable or legal to ask for Child Support suspension during the time we have temp custody?

2) What if anything can be done to prevent interuption into "childs" school year?
#14
Soc; our last interview w/ prospective atty was postpone, the new appt is not until Friday after "child" is returned to CP.

"Child" was picked up for summer visitation w/265 insect bites, a new prescription anti-anxiety med, and new prescription topical med.  This represents the norm for the condition of the child when we pick her up, and has continued like this for 4 years (all Dr. documented).

Our Order prevents us from taking child to the Doctor "except in the case of emergency"

"Child" stated to NCP that there had been the use of handcuffs ("like the police have") restraining her to the bed while she slept to keep her from scratching.

We had taken pictures of various body parts of "child" and the extent of the bites the evening we picked her up and also the identical photo's on her day of return showing the improvement.

1) In preparing to be heard on this et al, issues, is there anything else you can suggest to best preserve/document the condition of the child for court?

2) Is there some way to preserve/document child's statement about the handcuffs without contaminating it, for our atty's use later?

3) any other advise you can give is greatly appreciated ?

Arkmom
#15
Soc, as you may remember we consistantly have trouble with CP arriving on time, or at all, for visitation, due to differing interpretations of the order. Most recently for June 1, were she failed to show at all. (we came accross a sympathetic Deputy to write a report stating such)

Cp did not return our phone messages as of June 2 in the pm, so we called her local (pop. 300) sheriff to look in on child. Not 5 mins after hanging up with Sheriff's office, we finally recieved a call back from CP.

CP has interpreted "first two full weeks of June..." as starting on Sunday, June 6, despite our letter last year stating our interpretation (and yours!) of the order pertaining to summer visitation.

Our appt. with prospective atty's is not until Friday in the presiding county.

1) Is there such a thing as an emergency hearing to resolve summer visitation issues?

2) What would your intuition tell you about the proximity of our call to sheriff and the return call from CP?

3) Is there a recourse if the Sheriff's office is biased in CP's favor given the likeyhood that they are aquinted?
#16
Dear Socrateaser / Polygragh
May 31, 2004, 06:48:21 AM
Soc, we have recently come into a modest amount of money (not enough for the $3500 retainer for custody) so are in the midst of hiring an attorney to modify order (as you so often have encouraged) and contempt.

In our previous hearings to gain custody, we were never able to tangibly prove, or given the opportunity to present proof, of the hostile environment in which my SD is subjected to in CP's home.

We believe, but are not certain, that CP is pregnant. I am of the understanding that, as a rule, polygraph would not be administered to a pregnant subject.

Court jurisdiction is in Arkansas.

If we did manage to come up with the funds to attempt custody again:

1) Can a polygraph be applied to CP as proof of the volitile realationship between CP & her husband?

2) If not on CP, can the polygraph be applied to CP's husband?

3) Would you recommend a polygraph to prove this situation exists?

Thanks in advance
#17
Court Order states: "Summer visitation for the Defendant shall consisit of six (6) weeks to be taken in the following manner: The first two weeks of June after school is dismissed for the summer; The first two full weeks of July and the first two full weeks of August."

it also states: "That the non-custodial parent shall not take the minor child out of state without the permission of the custodial parent, which permission shall not be unreasonably withheld."

and also states: "In the event the minor child is ill, and therefore unable to exercise visitation with the non-custodial parent, the custodial parent will present a doctor's excuse to the non-custodial parent as evidence thereof, and said visitation shall be made up within 30 days"

Given the history of CP thwarting visitations, using the doctor's excuse to deny visitation (once for a runny nose and once for bug bites, among other unexcused denials), we anticipate that CP will find reason to disallow a 5 day, out of state vacation to Disney World during our two week visitation in August for which tickets are purchased.

If we notify her now we risk the denial , but have time to seek court help, although it is more likely CP would wait until Aug 1 to deny. Or we could wait until Aug, when we have "child" to notify, and  determine then if the denial  is "unreasonably"

1) How much notice would you suggest we give?
2) Do you have any other suggestions to circumvent problems?
3) What prevents us from following through with our vacation when out of state travel is "unreasonably denied"?
4) What are the repercussions (SP?) ?

Thank you for your help Soc
#18
As to your advise, Soc, re: BM denying visitation (her Spring Break vs our 3rd weekend)
Summary: NCP sent letter stateing our intentions for visitation for the 3rd weekend(sent Cert,RR).  CP responded by telephone message, her denial. NCP attempted to resolve same by telephone, to which CP refused and her now husband was "fielding his questions today" (NCP refuses to discuss matters with CP's husbands). NCP drafted another letter restating our position and our intention to be at the court ordered time and place. (sent Cert, RR, (UPS online updated as not delivered) & same time-a copy to Circuit Clerk-delivered). NCP drove the two hours, attained a gas station reciept on arrival and departure.
Contempt here is a slam dunk (to add to the dozens of others of the like), I think.
My questions are these:

1) What is CP's obligation to discuss matters of the child with NCP personally? Does CP have the legal entitlement to set an agent in lieu?

Off Topic: Child is made to take NCP's calls over speaker phone while CP supervises (along with everyone else in household to include 2 other children). Child has stated she doesn't like it and it's difficult for us to hear her tiny little 6 y/o voice.

1) Does NCP have the right to demand child be given appropriate privacy during his calls?
2) If yes: what's the least damaging approach to address this?

Can you direct us to somewhere to find what the guidelines are for a Standard Order (Arkansas)

Thank you
#19
In a recent question, Soc, I asked what would determine "Spring Break" in our vaque CO. In summary, you said the local public school.
Based on that, we sent a letter to CP , Certified and RR as follows:
"Dear XXX XXXXX,
This letter is intended to circumvent any confusion that may arise with regards to Spring Break and its relation to my visitation with XXXXXX on the 3rd weekend of this month.
The Agreed Order states, with regards to Spring Break, "...Spring Break if separate from Easter..." and with regards to weekend visitation, "The first and third weekends of each month beginning Friday at 7:00pm and continuing until Sunday at 7:00pm."
With no clear indication, in the Order, for the duration of Spring Break, standard order recognizes it as being defined by the Local Public School District.  XXXX XXXX School District calendar defines Spring Break as March 15-March 19, 2004. Your holiday visitation will conclude at 7:00pm, March 19, 2004.
I'm sure you realize that I consider my time with XXXXXX to be extremely special and valuable beyond measure.
      I will pick up XXXXXX: March 19, 2004, 7:00pm, Exit XX, XXXXXXXXXXX, XX
And return XXXXXX: March 21, 2004, 7:00pm, Exit XX, XXXXXXXXXXX, XX

Thank you,
XXXXX XXXXXXX"

this evening although she left a message on our machine saying that she "denied" our letter because we had child last year for the weekend following Spring Break and "that's what we'll be going by" (last year the weekend before, was our 3rd weekend visitation, the Judge ordered make up for past denied visitation for all of Spring break and the weekend following Spring Break was child's birthday, which was ours as well---three visitations all back to back)

1) What are our options?
#20
Dear Socrateaser / Clarification on CO wording
Mar 06, 2004, 06:33:30 AM
Our, very vaque,  CO reads "Easter if seperate from Spring Break. Spring Break if separate from Easter"  Spring Break defined by the Public school is March 15-19. Custodial Mom has Spring Break this year and our "3rd weekend" visitation should be 7pm, March 19-7pm, March 21. We anticipate Custodial Mom to interpret her Spring Break to include that (our) 3rd weekend.
(It does make mention in another paragraph, with re summer holidays(June/July/Aug) "...after school is dismissed for the summer" and in another paragraph "Holiday visitation shall always take precedence over weekend visitation")

My question is this:

1)With no indication in the Order as to start and stop of Spring Break, can we assume (legally) that it would be defined by the school calendar
(leaving her Spring Break to end at 7pm, March 19th and our 3rd weekend to begin at 7pm, March 19th?

Many Thanx Soc
#21
Dear Socrateaser / Contempt
Feb 09, 2004, 05:13:39 PM
I know I have seen this question before but regret never having read the answer to it!
When filing on contempt issues, and there are scads of them:
1) Do you file one 'biggie' for all?
2) Lump them into like issues (for ex: 20 lates as one contempt)?
3) Does each and every get a seperate charge?
Thanks for your time
#22
General Issues / NCP & HIPPA can anyone help?
Jun 09, 2004, 04:22:06 PM
Although sympathetic, dental office is unable/refusing to release records since CP signed HIPPA form omitting NCP"s name.  CO reads all access to records.

Can anyone point me to the actual code referencing this? Or discrediting dental office's refusal to release?
Thanx R
#23



           In a recent question to Soc, I asked what would determine "Spring Break" in our vaque CO. In summary, he said the local public school.
Based on that, we sent a letter to CP , Certified and RR as follows:
"Dear XXX XXXXX,
This letter is intended to circumvent any confusion that may arise with regards to Spring Break and its relation to my visitation with XXXXXX on the 3rd weekend of this month.
The Agreed Order states, with regards to Spring Break, "...Spring Break if separate from Easter..." and with regards to weekend visitation, "The first and third weekends of each month beginning Friday at 7:00pm and continuing until Sunday at 7:00pm."
With no clear indication, in the Order, for the duration of Spring Break, standard order recognizes it as being defined by the Local Public School District. XXXX XXXX School District calendar defines Spring Break as March 15-March 19, 2004. Your holiday visitation will conclude at 7:00pm, March 19, 2004.
I'm sure you realize that I consider my time with XXXXXX to be extremely special and valuable beyond measure.
I will pick up XXXXXX: March 19, 2004, 7:00pm, Exit XX, XXXXXXXXXXX, XX
And return XXXXXX: March 21, 2004, 7:00pm, Exit XX, XXXXXXXXXXX, XX

Thank you,
XXXXX XXXXXXX"

this evening although she left a message on our machine saying that she "denied" our letter because we had child last year for the weekend following Spring Break and "that's what we'll be going by" (last year the weekend before, was our 3rd weekend visitation, the Judge ordered make up for past denied visitation for all of Spring break and the weekend following Spring Break was child's birthday, which was ours as well---three visitations all back to back)

We need to respond to her quicklike. Anyone have any input for us