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Dear Soc,

We live in OH.

As I have posted before, I am the temporary CP of my 11 year old son.  

I'll try to make the history brief.......

BM and I agreed that it would be best for our son if he lived with me while BM finished
college.  The only concerns BM had at the time was whether or not she would be able to
make ends meet if she was not recieving child support.  In the end, BM agreed it would
be in our son's best interests to live with me.

As of June 2006, my son moved in with me full time.  My attorney, BM and myself sat down
and hammered out an agreement naming me as the residential parent but giving us joint legal
custody.  BM voluntarily got EOW visitation and two weeks summer vacation.  I offered more
but BM said she would be unable to practice more visitation due to her work and school
schedule. BM and myself signed the agreement.

The agreement was filed with the court at the end of July.  I continued to pay weekly child
support as well.  BM would pick our son up on a fairly regular basis for her visits with
him.  

By October we still had heard nothing back from the courts regarding our motion.  BM and
I had a disagreement and she decided to revoke her signature from our motion.  I received
notice from the court that BM had revoked her signature and that our motion had been set
aside.  The court set my motion for hearing.

I filed an ex parte motion with the court asking for temporary custody of my son until the
hearing and It was granted.  BM never contested.  That was Oct 06.  Six weeks went by where
BM did not pick our son up for her parenting time.  When she finally did pick our son up
for her visit, she stated to me that she wanted to come to some kind of agreement to stay
out of court.  

My attorney faxed a proposal to BM's attorney stating that; I be given custody, that BM
be given 3 weekends a month parenting time and that child support be awarded.  BM hit the
roof.  Bm stated that she would NOT agree to pay child support and that she would see me
in court.  

Almost a month goes by and BM is becoming more verbally abusive to our son.  My son meets
with his counselor who agrees that it would be best if BM's visits with our son were
supervised.  I filed an ex parte motion with the courts asking for BM to have supervised
visitation which was also granted.  BM was served in DEC '06 and has never contested this.

It is now March and BM has still not set anything up for these visits with
our son.  She has spoken to him via telephone an average of three times a month since.
It has been two months now since she was served with the supervised visitation order.

Last Friday, I got a notice from my attorney that BM has requested an immediate hearing
 on the temporary orders for custody which the courts granted me.    This makes no sense to me that she would wait so long to do this as we go to
hearing for the actual custody case on March 15th.  The immediate hearing was this past Friday and we never even went inside the courtroom. Her attorney asked if we could compromise and give BM an unsupervised visit before court and I agreed to a 10 hour unsupervised visit with BM. The visit was today and my son said it went well.

We go for the custody hearing in just under two weeks now.

As of now, my son has been living with me full time for the past 8 months. He is enrolled
in school and doing well despite his learning disabilties. He has many friends and is
involved in the sports that he so loves to play.  He also has no desire to move back in
with BM.  

questions.........

1. Will the fact that BM waited for many months to set anything up to see our son bear any weight on the judge's decision regarding custody?

2. What about the fact that BM has failed to practice her court ordered visitation?


3. In your opinion, what are my chances at keeping custody of my son?

4. What about the agreement we had in place over the summer that was filed with the court, will that bear any weight in this case?


Thank you in advance for any help you can offer me!

Dear Socrateaser,

We live in Ohio.  

I am the CP of my 3 children ages 10, 7 and 5. NCP has EOW visitation plus a midweek visit that he does not practice (the midweek he does not practice, he gets the kids EOW).  CO states that the NCP be responsible for all transportation for visits.

My current husband and I moved about a year and a half ago.  We are now about 55 miles away from the NCP.  I have willingly provied half of the transportation for NCP's visits since we have moved (I meet him half way).  NCP is becoming very difficult to deal with. He is often late for pick-up/drop-off.

Last drop off, he was 1/2 hour late with no phone call or notice.  This is becomming the norm and is very unnerving.   I have notified him that I will no longer be providing half of the transportation if he cannot be on time. He is threatening to take it to court.

Another issue is the place of the visitations.  NCP lives with his mother in a one bedroom house. We have three children together plus he has another child with another woman. He also has his g/f living with him and she has three children as well.  That makes 7 kids and 3 adults crammed into a small one bedroom house.

My kids have complained quite a bit about the sleeping situation at the NCPs. They say they have to cram onto the couch or the recliners to sleep.  There is simply not enough space in this house to accomodate all of those people.

My questions for you are this:

1. If NCP brings the courts into this, will the judge order me to provide transportation for NCP's visits?  This is not really a problem if NCP can be on time.

2. Will the living arrangements of the NCP be looked into?  I have asked NCP if his g/f could possibly take her children on a different weekend so they are not so crowded but NCP tells me it is none of my business what goes on there.


Thank you in advance Soc!

Dear Socrateaser,

We live in Ohio.

Thank you for advice in my earlier post.

My son came to live with me in June 2006 under an agreed entry betweeen BM and myself.  BM revoked her signature on this entry and the judge set the case for hearing in January 2007 but has been now continued until March 2007.  The judge gave me temporary custody in October 2006.  BM was granted visitation rights under our local rule 19.

BM wanted to settle this case out of court and offered to leave me the custodial parent providing that she gets 3 weekends a month in parenting time, pays no child support and claims our son on her income tax return every other year.  I agreed to all except that she would be responsible for child support.   Now she doesn't want to settle, she wants to go to  court.  

She was also ordered supervised visitation with our son.  She was served right after Christmas.  She has not made any efforts so far to set up any visitation.  

When we go to court in March, my son will have lived with me for 9 months.  He is 11 and has no desire to move back in with his mother.  

1.  What are the chances of custody given back to BM?

2.  Will the judge take my son's wishes into consideration?

3.  Will the judge take into consideration that BM and I had an agreement ready to submit but she changed her mind because she didn't want to pay child support?

Thank you!

Dear Socrateaser,

We live in Ohio.

My son's mother and I entered into an agreed entry for a change in primary custody in July.  This entry named me as the residential and custodial parent of our 11 year old son.  The entry was filed and presented to the judge in late July.  After a disagreement between BM and myself, BM revoked her signature from the entry.

The judge granted me temporary custody and set a hearing date for January.  BM was granted visitation rights.

Since coming to live with me in June, my son has had many unpleasant visits with his mother and maternal grandparents.  They often call him names, put him down and belittle him because of his choice to move in with me.  After his last visit with them, he came home in tears and said that his mother pushed him, told him to get out of her car and that she was going to sign her rights away and never see him again.  

My attorney filed a motion requesting a modification in BM's visitation.  We requested that the visitation be supervised until the hearing.  This was only filed a few days ago and we have yet to hear from the judge.
My son is due to spend the weekend with the BM and is refusing to go.

1. If my son is refusing to go, does he have to?

2.  Will I be in contempt if I don't "force" him to go?

3.  What are my son's rights?

Thank you!

Hi Soc,

Thank you for your advice on other topic.  We have never really had to use these court papers and some of the wording seems confusing.  

Document states:  "Mother and Father shall  alternate Christmas school break in the flollowing manner: from the time the child is on school break to until Christmas Eve Day at 5:00p.m. with Father and then  child shall be with Mother from Christmas Eve day from 5:00p.m. to the day after Christmas at 10:00 a.m.  when Father shall have child for the first one-half of the school break from the day after Christmas until child returns to school and Mother shall have child for the last half of the school break.  "

"This Christmas schedule shall alternate with Father being the Odd year numbered parent and Mother being the Even year numbefed parent."

question #1:  Does that read as confusing to you as it does to us?  Does that mean we get Step son from Xmas eve night until Xmas morn and then again for the first half of the rest of his break?  

Document also states:  "mother shall abe the residential custodial parent of child when the child is in her physical possession and father shall be the residential custodial parent of child when child is in his physical possession."  

"Parties shall make all exchanges of the child at maternal parent's home if transportation cannot be agreed upon then the non custodial parent shall arrange and provide for transportation."

question #2:  Since the mother and father are  both the custodial parents when child is in their posession, who would be responsible for the transportation?  

We have always been the ones who transport him and she always wants us to bring him all the way to her house which is another 10-15 miles from pick up point designated in court papers. Plus we always pick step son up at her house as well.  

Thank you again for your help....We have never really had to go by the custody agreement before.  

Hello!

I am a step mother of a 9 year old boy.  My husband and his ex have joint physical/legal custody of this child with the BM having residential school placement.  We live in different cities about 21 miles apart.  Although the court order says my husband is to have him the last three weekends of the month and all school breaks,  we have his son about 4-5 days a week and transport him to and from school.

When step son is with BM she has no childcare for him and he is sometimes home alone until 10pm.  We have tried to pick him up as much as we can so that he will not be left home alone.  He has gotten into some minor trouble here and there because of his lack of supervision, but nothing really bad YET.   BM refuses to spend any time with her son stating that she needs time to herself.  

Step son has stated that he wishes his mom would spend some time with him and that he wouldn't mind living with us full time.  This would mean a change in schools but not much about the living arrangements would change since he is here 90% time anyway.   He is obviously torn between a home that has no rules and boundries and a home where he knows rules will be enforced.  BM told us that she would never let him live with us because she might lose her school grants and medical card.  

BM also recieves regular weekly child support from my husband even though step son is with us most of time and we provide all clothes, food, transportation and such.   It is becoming difficult to pay for him to live at both houses.  

Questions:

1. How old do children have to be to have their opinion count in front of the judge.  

2. Would it be difficult to modify the custody agreement?

3. Can we get a modification in the amount of child support paid?

4.  How young is too young to be left alone?  We think that he is too young at 9 to have so much freedom and responsibility.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post.  Could post so many more things that would influence the modification but I wanted to stick with the recent concerns.  Thank you again.

Hello to all!  New to this site and wanted to share my story and ask for advice.  

Here goes.........*bear with me as I do not understand all of the abbreviations yet.......LOL

I have been with my husband about 4 years and we have been married a little over a year.  Husband has one son, age 9, and I have 3 children ages, 8,6, and 4.  Husband was not married before and we have no children together.  THe children all get along great and we have had pretty much NO trouble blending our family.  

My husband and his ex share custody of their son.  It is supposed to be set up that we have SS for every weekend, every school holiday, and all summer vacation.  Usually ends up that we have SS 90% of time. (which we love......not complaining)  Husband's ex has repeatedly left SS home alone since he was 6 years old, let's him stay up until after 11pm on school nights, doesn't make him do his homework, never knows where he is when we call to talk to  him, instead of getting  him off to school in the morning, she has him set his alarm and get himself off to school while she sleeps, always demands to have him at least half of the day on our holidays with him, she doesn't even come home some evenings until after 9pm.......that means SS is alone from 3:30pm until she decides to show up.  She is not involved in anything that he does......sports, school, whatever.  We are at every single sporting event, school conference.........you name it.  Did I mention that we do ALL transportation and she does none??  She also recieves almost $400 a month in CS.  If my husband says anything negative to her about her "parenting" than big fight outburst and she tries to withhold parenting time or tells SS that we hate her........so on and so on.  It has been nothing but a nightmare since day one.  

I guess my question is WHY does she insist on retaining residential parental custody???????  My only honest answer to that is MONEY and BENEFITS.  My husband has told her several times that if we took residential custody that he wouldn't ask her for a dime in CS, she could have the same parenting time schedule as he has if she wants it, and that she could visit him anytime she pleases as long as we don't already have plans.  She still refuses.......WHY?.?............she says she is afraid she will lose her medical card and school grants if SS lives with us.  WTF???  That's a reason to keep him , huh?  Did I mention that she works part time, goes to school part time...........has no babysitter, and even on days off , spends absolutely NO time with her son???

SS is getting tired of the whole routine but craves his mom's attention so badly that he buys all of the BS she dishes out to him.  She showed up for ONE of his football games.............and then didn't show up to his awards dinner after she told him she would be there.  HE was so angry and hurt that I cried.  When we asked her where she was her response was that she "forgot".  She keeps saying that when she is done with school she will be more available to her son and he will benefit in the long run BUT she has been a student for about 6 or 7 years............keeps changing majors and picking up more classes.  Now she tells us "just a couple more years" and she will be done.  SS will be almost 13 when she is done!!  

Where do we go from here??  We've tried taking custody and she played this poor me act for the judge as to how hard she is struggling being a single mom and how we were so mean for trying to take her son away and so we were only awarded the joint legal/physical custody but she is custodial parent for school placement.  Did I mention that his 1st grade school year she moved 5 times and he went to 4 different schools?  Missed 28 days of school, tardy 19 times?  Ended up getting  held back and her answer was to medicate him.  Moved twice his second grade year...........barely passed onto 3rd grade this year.  

We now only live about 15 minutes away from SS but had lived 1 1/2 hours away before and still spent more time with him than she did.  We are currently picking him up after school to make sure his homework gets done and that he isn't left home alone.  Then WE do all the driving to take him back to his mom's for school the next day.

Last draw for me was last week my husband went to pick up SS and he wasn't home.  Called ex on her cellphone and she didn't know where he was either.  Combed the neighborhood for hours looking for him and no luck.  We were scared out of our minds...........Bio mom didn't even come home to help look for  him.  We finally found him at his mom's cousins house playing outside at 9pm!!!  What do we do??  

Thank you all so much for listening...........I know this post was extremely long but needed to vent so badly!  If anyone has any advice to give please feel free to respond.  

Hope to be able to help one of you out with advice soon!
-krazyfamily_6

Hello to you all.  I have posted here a few times in the last few months but mostly in Soc's forum.

I will try to make this brief but please bear with me.



BM and I agreed that it would be best for our son if he lived with me while BM finished college. The only concerns BM had at the time was whether or not she would be able to make ends meet if she was not recieving child support. In the end, BM agreed it would be in our son's best interests to live with me.  My son is now 11.

At this time, we shared custody of our son with BM being the residential custodial parent for school placement purposes.  I live 15 miles from BM. I had this parenting time.... 3 weekends a month, mid week for 3 hours, every school break, we shared holidays and I had my son for the entire school summer vacation.  However, I was picking my son up from school on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday and he was staying all night with me.  I also had 3 weekends a month so this left BM with only one day a week with our son.......her choice.  She had class 2 days a week and worked part time so she was too "busy" to have him more often.  

As of June 2006, my son moved in with me full time. My attorney, BM and myself sat down and hammered out an agreement naming me as the residential parent but giving us joint legal custody. BM voluntarily got EOW visitation and two weeks summer vacation. I offered more
but BM said she would be unable to practice more visitation due to her work and school schedule. BM and myself signed the agreement.

The agreement was filed with the court at the end of July. I continued to pay weekly child support as well. BM would pick our son up on a fairly regular basis for her visits with
him.

By October we still had heard nothing back from the courts regarding our motion. BM and I had a disagreement and she decided to revoke her signature from our motion. I received notice from the court that BM had revoked her signature and that our motion had been set
aside. The court set my motion for hearing.

I filed an ex parte motion with the court asking for temporary custody of my son until the hearing and It was granted. BM never contested. That was Oct 06. Six weeks went by where BM did not pick our son up for her parenting time. When she finally did pick our son up
for her visit, she stated to me that she wanted to come to some kind of agreement to stay out of court.

My attorney faxed a proposal to BM's attorney stating that; I be given custody, that BM be given 3 weekends a month parenting time and that child support be awarded. BM hit the roof. Bm stated that she would NOT agree to pay child support and that she would see me in court.

Almost a month goes by and BM is becoming more verbally abusive to our son. My son meets with his counselor who agrees that it would be best if BM's visits with our son were supervised. I filed an ex parte motion with the courts asking for BM to have supervised
visitation which was also granted. BM was served in DEC '06 did not contest.

Two months go by and BM fails to exercise the supervised visitation.  She calls my son an average of twice a month....sometimes more.  She has not been involved in any of his activities or his schooling.......even though I have given her copies of all schedules.

So just two weeks ago, BM finally contested the supervised visitation.  It had been two months since she had been served.  We never went into the courtroom as the attorneys encouraged us to come to some kind of agreement.  So I agreed to let BM have two unsupervised visits with our son both visits to be from 9am-6pm; one on Sunday and the following Saturday.  My son was very nervous and didn't really want to go but ended up going and having a nice visit with his mother and grandparents.

We go for the actual custody hearing tomorrow afternoon.  I am a bit nervous and not sure what to expect.  My attorney keeps assuring me that we have a solid case and she sees no reason that the court would change the current status quo as my son is doing well, happy and well adjusted.

My son has now been living with me full time for 9 months.  For 7 of those months, I paid BM weekly child support.  She offered no financial help to me for our son.  BM has not came to ONE school function, not ONE school conference, not ONE football, baseball or basketball practice.....only showed up to ONE basketball game, and only a couple football games (one of those she left early too).  She has not been involved other than her picking him up in the beginning EOW.  

I guess I am just looking for some reassurance here......that my son will remain with me as I believe with all of my heart that is what is best for him.

Hello to all.  Thank you in advance for any advice or info you can offer me.  

Let me give you some history.  I am the father of an 11 year old boy.  His mother and I were never married.  She has made it difficult for me to be active in  my son's life for as long as I can remember.  She would often not be home when it was time for me to pick my son up and would only want me to come and get him if she needed  a "babysitter". I took her to court and was granted visitation rights through the court when my son was 2 years old.  Things got better for awhile or should I say, as long as I was giving her what she wanted then things went ok.  My son was frequently left home alone as early as age 5.  He was also let to "roam" the neighborhood while BM slept or talked on the phone.  I would often arrive to pick him up and she would have no idea where he was.  Her response was always, "oh he'll turn up sooner or later".  She rarely spent any time with him and he was pretty much living with her parents when he was not with me.

Things got worse as my son got older.  BM started leaving my son home alone on a regular basis.  He was instructed to NOT tell me and was told to lie and tell me that he had a sitter.  She started denying me telephone contact through the week as well.  

In 2003, I filed for a modification in child custody.  However, since I did not have proof that he was left home alone and BM lied her butt off in court, the judge decided it would be best to award joint legal and physical custody.  This actually made BM happy.  I still had to pay child support, I had my son 50% of the time and I also bought all of my son's school supplies, clothes, paid for extracurriculars........you get the idea.  

BM has become less and less involved in our son's life since then.  I got married in 2004 and my wife has three children as well.  My son started spending more and more time at my house. (I live about 15 minutes away from BM)  By 2005, he had pretty much moved in here.  My son was staying all night 5 to 6  out of 7 nights a week.  My wife or I would drive him to his school every morning.  BM did not participate in school conferences, football practices or games, baseball games, banquets, award ceremonies or anything else.  She would see our son maybe once a week at best.  Telephone contact was even less.......averaging about twice a month.  My son came to me in Feb 2006 and told me that he wanted to move in with me and go to school in our town.  I told him we would discuss this with his mother.  BM agreed that it was a good idea but was reluctant to change the custodial status (she had been named residential parent for school placement purposes) because she wasn't sure if she could make ends meet without recieving her child support payments.  She also expressed concern about losing her medical card and grants for school.  She said she would have to think about it.  In March, she finally agreed to the change in custody.  We got together and tried to iron out issues such as visitation and what not.  I offered her 3 weekends a month, mid week visits , summer vacation, and any time our son was not in school.  I also invited her to take part in extra curricular activities and such.  She declined saying she just wanted to pick him up every other weekend because her schedule didn't allow for her to have him so much.  I contacted my attorney, he drew up the paperwork, and she signed the agreement.  The agreement stated that we would share custody but she would pay no child support and she opted to only have standard visitation with our son.  The agreement was signed in July 2006 and filed with the courts for the judge's signature on Aug 1 2006.  We waited and waited for a response from the court and got nothing.  Finally, in October of 2006, BM got upset because we were not home one Sunday evening when she wanted to pick our son up (it was not her weekend to have him either ) and called the courthouse and revoked her signature.  Just like that the judge dismissed the agreement and set the motion for hearing. My son also started seeing a counselor to help him deal with all of this. In all the time that my son has been living with me, BM has only practiced every other weekend visitation with him and average phone contact of maybe twice a month.  She has not came to any school or sports function and I have paid child support to her the entire time.  She has also chosen NOT to participate in his counseling sessions, even though the counselor has invited her on several occasions.  

My attorney filed a motion for temporary custody until the hearing and it was granted.  BM was not pleased and called my home yelling at my son because "he started all of this".  She told him that it didn't matter what he wanted and that he was coming back to live with her.  My son was very upset and kept pleading with BM to let him stay here with  me.  He told her that she doesn't have time for him and he is happy where he is at.  She yelled obcenities at him and finally he told her that he would not go to her house for his weekend visit.  She made no effort to try to pick him up that weekend either.  4 weeks went by with no contact from BM at all.  Finally my son asked to call her and she would not speak to him.  A week later, she called back and asked him if he would like to spend the weekend with her and he agreed.  When she returned him home after the visit, she told me that she had talked with our son and that he wanted to live with me but wanted to spend 3 weekends a month with her.  She said she did not want to go to court and wanted to come to some kind of agreement.  I told her that I would speak to my attorney.  I thought we were going to settle out of court BUT BM decided she did not want to agree to anything because I asked for a small amount of child support.  She said she shouldn't have to pay me a dime.  Mind you, this entire time, I have still been paying her child support and she did not offer one cent to help with our son......not school clothes or anything.  

So now we are in December and BM is visiting about every other weekend but not civil.  My son is starting to not want to go on his visits but I have tried to encourage him to work on his relationship with his mom.  Week before Christmas, I hear tires squeeling outside and open the door.  My son is walking towards the house crying so hard he was having trouble walking.  My son tells me that BM just shoved him and told him that she wanted him out of her car.  He said that she told him she was going to sign her rights away to him and he would never see her again.  He also said that he had spend the weekend at his grandparent's house (not uncommon as he hardly ever spent the weekends with his mother) and that when he told them he didn't want to live with his mom, his grandmother got upset and started yelling at him.  She told him that if he wanted to live with his dad then she would adopt another grandson and give all of his things away.  Then she told him that I was a no good sneaky SOB and that she wanted him out of her house and not to come back.  This hurt him so badly that he told me that he never wanted to go back there again. My son spoke with his counselor about this and she and my attorney got together and filed a motion for the judge for BM to have supervised visitations.   BM called the day before Christmas Eve wanting son for the day.  He told her that he did not want to go with her but that if she wanted to come over to my house to visit him she could.  She told him no way and hung up the phone.  Finally he agreed to spend the day with her but told her that he did not want to go to his grandparents house.  Of course, they went there anyway.  A few days later, the courts granted our motion and BM was served with the order for supervised visitation.  This was a few days after Christmas and she has made no effort to see our son since then.  She has only called him 3 times as well.  She has called me once calling me all kinds of names and calling our son a liar.  She said that she can't wait to battle me in court and she hopes the judge strips me of all visitiation and that she knows she will be awarded custody.

She has also told our son that he is a liar and that the judge will make him come back with her.  She said that her and her parents never mistreated him and that they are all going to testify as to how badly he was behaving while he was visiting.   She does not show up for his basketball games even though I always have sent her a copy of his schedules.  WHen our son asked her why she doesn't come, she told him because she doesn't want to be around  his father.  Come on!  She has not seen him in over a month!  What kind of excuse is that?

Our court date is set for the middle of March.  I have a whole years worth of notes stating all of the times I have had my son, when she has picked him up, called, not picked him up, the doctors, orthodontist, counselors appointments she has not bothered to come to.......all of that stuff.  My son has been living with me now for 7 months.  When we go to court, it will be 9 months.

I guess I am just here for some support and thought maybe some of you could share some advice or tips or whatever with me.  Is there anything else I should be doing?  

Thank yo so much for reading this.........I know it was long but had to get it all out.

Have some questions on our court order.  I am the custodial parent of my 11 year old son.  BM has the standard EOW visitation with an additional weekend every month.  This is specifically what our court order states......

"XXXXX (BM) is granted parenting time with the minor child pursuant to Loc.R.19, and shall have one additional weekend per month as long as she guarantees that minor child attends all his regularly scheduled activities when he is in her care.  XXXXX (me) shall advise XXXX (BM) at least three weeks in advance as to which weekend XXXX (BM) may have for her third weekend each month."

So every month I email BM a schedule for the next month, with copies of any and all school/extra curricular activites included.  BM asked for a week of time with our son during August which I agreed to outside of the court order.  I notified BM that our son had football practice for four days of that week and she agreed to take him.  I told her that if she couldn't take him for some reason, to let me know and I would take him.
Needless to say, BM did not take our son to practice for that week.  

My attorney advised me to file a contempt charge as this is not the first time that BM refused to comply with the court order.......examples......not returning our son on time after her visitation, not taking him to scheduled activities, not allowing phone contact on extended visits with our son............and so on.  

So I filed for contempt.  BM had our son over the weekend and brought him almost an hour late for his first football game of the season......so he was made to sit out.  She just dropped him off and left.

My son was upset after the game because he didn't get to play and he had practiced very hard all week.  When I asked him what was bothering him, he said that his mom told  him that I was taking her weekends away from her and that she got her car taken away because she has to give me money.  He also said that his mom promised to take him to an amusement park but didn't take him because I make her pay me money.  

Ok, she was court ordered to pay a meager amount in child support which she just started paying after over a year of not paying a dime.  Also, none of her weekends have been taken away from her, she has gotten our son on all of her scheduled weekends in addition to several other times outside of the court order.

I guess the question I am asking is how do I handle this?  

How many of you have filed a contempt charge?  Did the BM get charged?

How many of you deal with BM telling the child outright lies about you?  How do you deal with that?  

I don't want to badmouth my son's mother to him but I feel like I should be able to sort the truth out for him.  He has all this anger towards his mother but has been directing it towards me for most of this summer.

I welcome all advice, thank you.