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Topics - olanna

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Checking court records last night over bf's divorce that has been ongoing for nearly four years...

It said:


This is California.

Any advice is appreciated.

Child Support Issues / Revocation of Driver's License....
« on: Apr 07, 2008, 06:45:36 PM »
If a notice of intent to revoke a license is issued and the official date of revokation is August 2008, what exactly does that mean???

Does that mean that there is an intent to take the license if the  situation isn't resolved by August or does that mean that the license is revoked from the date of the letter?

Other than paying the arrears in full, does California offer other options?

There has been a lot of discussion on this board about the current system not working.  Please feel free to post your response and elaborate on any issues that you are having with the current court system regarding child support, child visitation, etc.

but I wanted to share something with all of those NCP Mom's out there, that have basically experienced poverty, and near homelessness or homelessness through no real fault of their own.

I don't really know why I feel compelled to tell this story, but I am.  I think most of all, those of us going through hard times, custody battles or whatever, need hope. I want to share with you something that will certainly help provide that.

Back in 1999, I was working as Network Engineer on a Y2K project, making about 180K a year.  Pretty wonderful money, no doubt. Well, my ex caught wind of it, and since he lost his job for stealing from his company, he decided to use the last of it to fight me in court for the youngest of our three children. I am sure, as I have been told, he viewed me as the cash cow.

The battle completely drained me of all my savings, and in the end, I found he had paid off the necessary people to win the case.  I was forced to send my son to an environment that was unhealthy.  I later found out that the perfect couple back in SC wasn't so perfect...

And my own marriage ended 3 weeks after sending my son back to SC, as my then husband met a girl online and took off to KY to meet her.  It was one of the most horrible times of my life.  

I ended up without any money, had to sell my house, and moved from place to place with my youngest son, wondering where it would all end.  

Finally in December 2004, a lady I knew offered me her home. I got into it with hardly a dime and no money down. It was a tiny little home of about 800 square feet, but it was a place to call home.  My son and I were elated. About 6 weeks after I moved in, Januaury 2005, I got a dream job with dream pay.  And by the summer of 2005, my son got on a plane and told his dad he couldn't take it anymore and came back out here to live with me.

None of this was easy. I constantly remained in contact as best I could...I snuck out to SC to see him without his Dad knowing...and I would mail letters to him, knowing that he often checked the mail before they got home, timing those deliveries to happen on weekdays.  I always remembered his birthday and holidays...no matter how broke I was...and even when I didn't hear from him for months on end, I still send those cards and letters...sent pictures of us, as well.

It all paid off. I want you to know that it can pay off for you, too.

And today I am in a brand new home...some 1800 square feet with my two youngest sons.  And I have a wonderful new man in my life, too.  

It can happen for you, as well.


And would you believe his father said..."I am not giving you custody of him."

OK...so I haven't figured out what makes him think he can retain custody of a 16 year old kid that lives 3000 miles from him.  I guess it's the demi-God status he believes he holds.

No matter, I am going to file for custody and request CA take jurisdiction over the matter, as that will be his home state in December.
He can come out here and argue his status.

I know I am no longer a NCP, but I feel my presence here might benefit some NC Mom's searching for ways to stay in contact with their children.

Moms Without Custody / News to share....
« on: Jun 09, 2005, 03:28:35 PM »
Don't know if any of you remember my story...

Big changes....

My son is coming back to live with me. No courts...Dad is tired of dealing with a teen and honestly, he's done a pretty crappy job with him.  

He is going to meet me on vacation and fly home with me.  

I just wanted to share that with all of you.

Moms Without Custody / Questions about Custody
« on: Feb 11, 2005, 12:02:16 AM »
I am currently involved in a custody battle.  I have a child with a former boyfriend who never wanted anything to do with her.   When I filed for child support, her father decided to file for custody.  The father is telling the courts one thing - that he can be a better parent, etc, meanwhile telling me that he will hurt our daughter once he gets visitation if I don't drop the support.  How can he do this and how can I stop him?  Help.

Moms Without Custody / How could this be handled?
« on: Aug 16, 2004, 10:32:50 PM »
My daughter just got engaged to a long time bf and I must say, I couldn't be happier for her.  I am so proud of all that she is and all that she has become over the years..

She just graduated from college and moved into the house she built not too far from Monterey, CA, with her fiance.

She called her father to tell him the good news and ask if he would come out here to give her away.  In her own words, he laughed and said, "what makes you think I would give you away when you haven't even asked me to come to the wedding?"

So she backtracked and asked him to come to the wedding...and his reply????

"Not if your Mom is going to be at the wedding."

She told him he was immature and she really wished he could get past himself long enough to see what he was missing in life...

(He also refused to come to her college graduation, as he knew I would be there).

Now, tell me...please...

There is so much life that is going to happen in the next few years....weddings, possibly grandchildren...not to mention the son on the east coast's graduation from High school (that I most certainly will attend, no matter what)....

You know, I really wish that we could our differences behind us and make these last few years work out for all the kids.  I know it can be done, as I coparent so very well with my youngest son's dad...we are actually good friends.

I wish there was a way to convince him of this but I just don't know how to do it. I have tried to talk to him on the phone...wrote him a letter but I have run out of ideas...and I feel very sad for my daughter, who really wanted to be given in marriage by her own father.

Moms Without Custody / Dr. Phil is a really smart guy...
« on: Aug 15, 2004, 10:57:18 AM »
and I like his tactical planning...:)

After his little talk with my ex, it looks like we might be doing the Dr. Phil show after all!  I will keep you updated!

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