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Hey Socra,

quick question.

I am going through divorce/custody. And I have to update my financial affidavit. However, I currently have 2 savings accounts that I didn't have before, with good amounts of money in them. I am afraid that if I list those as items owned; that it will have to be shared with xhubby. That money is money that I have saved, meticiously, since our serparation. That I worked hard to do and I don't think I should have to split it with xhubby.

Is there a way to list the money without it being a marital assest, thus needing to be divided. I think that when xhubby sees my affidavit, he'll want half of that money.

Thoughts. Suggestions.
Thanks

Hey Socrateaser, just a few quick questions.

My husband and I have been separated for a 3+ months. I have sinced changed the locks on the doors so that he can't come take anything without me knowing. So my question is

1. Am I in the wrong for doing that?

2. Does he still have a right to come into the home, even though he longer resides there, since we're still married? (I filled for divorce beginning of October).

3. Would he get in trouble by the law if he got a locksmith to open the door when I wasn't there?

I have no problem with him getting his things, but I don't want him in the house when I am not there. Thanks.

Hello All, I am going through a divorce/custody right now. I have an attorney and filed for divorce in FL in the beginning of October. Following FL laws, both parents have custody bc we are still married. My husband wants to get our 1 year old son and 3 year old daughter one FULL week and his house and then one FULL week at my house. I don't like this idea for several reason. First being, he is living with his mom and dad. His father smokes and both of our children have asthma and were hospitolized for RSV, (not related to papa's smoking) but it doesn't help their asthma for them to be around the smoke. Second, I have been the primary care provider and I as was stay-at-home mother since our son's birth. I think that the schedule he wants isn't good for such young children. And third, I think that he wants to get the kids more, so that when we go to court, he can tell the judge that he has the 50% of the time and doesn't need to pay me what the guidelines say (he made $67k last year and the guidelines say that he should be paying about $1600.00 a month). So, of course, he is having a cow about the amount. I had agreed on a temp amount bc I knew that his work was really slow and he also has his other child (10 year) to care for, he has sole custody of her and her bio-mom was declared indigent. I had my lawyer file a motion for an emergency hearing so I can get some form of a court order, but it was denied and referred to mediation. The only mediation appointment available was for the end of January and he said he has "training" that day. So now, we have to wait for the February calendar to open up. I am frustarted with all of this. Because we have no order and the way that he laws work, there is nothing I can do in regards to keeping the kids on a different schedule than the every other week thing. The schedule I want isnt too different. My husband has every other wed and sat off. So he has the kids on the weekend he has off and then the week that he has wed off, he picks them up on tuesday evening and bring them back thursday morning or takes them to their respective locations for school. I really don't like the schedule that he wants and I am afraid that if we have to go to court, the judge will rule in his favor bc its the schedule that has been in effect for the last 3 months given that there is nothing I can do.

Do you have any suggestions on what to do? I gave him a proposal to look over. He ansewred the petition with his counterpetition for divorce and the above schedule. I told him last night that he needs to give me a proposal back so we can try and duke something out without going to court. I won't have the money to keep a lawyer around if I have to go to court. I have never been through this stuff before, personally. I mean we dealt with things bc of my husbands ex-wife, but that was somewhat different.

Do you have any suggestions on what I should do? I don't like hanging in limbo with no paperwork between us. Thanks.

K

I am in the process of going through divorce with my husband. We have 2 young children, 1 year old boy and 3 year old girl. I am trying my hardest to do what is best for our children. However, I don't feel like he is, I feel like whatever he does is going to be a direct opppsite of me bc he doesn't want anything to be like me. (Does that make sense?). Because we don't have anything finalized, we both have custody and can basically do whatever we see fit. So he is taking the children for one full week at his house and then one full week at my house. This schedule has been going on for about 2 months. Before we separated, I was the stay-at-home mother. I was the primary child care provider. I don't think the children are responding well to this schedule. They seem to be clingy when they are with me. My daughter has begun to cry when I drop her off at school or leave her with anyone (before she didn't). My son is the same way, now he is having problems going to be on his own. He screams and fights me (Body rigid). I don't want to just put him in his crib bc I don't want him to see me walking away from him. I have our daughter call and say good night to her father and older half-sister when I have the children, but doesn't have her call me. So I have decided to call myself to talk with her but she refuses to come to the phone, whining or crying that she doens't want to. So I call her at daycare instead and she comes to the phone just fine and talks with me for a few minutes. I know that my husband knows the importance of consistency and that trying to make our homes similar, in regards to schedules, bedtimes, etc, will help the kids adjust; but he refuses and just says that he'll have his rules at his house and vice versa. I hate how this is upseting the kids. I tried to suggest to him that we can do 50/50 when the children are older and can cognitively understand week here and week there. I am afraid that every time the kids go, they don't understand that they are coming back. My husband got into an agruement with me on the phone and he was screaming at me that I am nothing to his daughter (my step-daugher, the one I raised for the last 8 years of her life). I hung up after he screamed that over and over bc I didn't want our children to hear him talking to me like that. There is a zillion other petty things that I am sure all of you have been through. Why doesn't my daughter want to call me on the phone when she is over there? I worry that he (and his family bc he lives with his mom and dad) are bad-mouthing me or something.

Please don't confuse any of this as trying to keep my kids from their father. My husband has custody of his daughter (from a previsous relationship so I am all for fathers). My husband has been a previous pot smoker( everyday) and drank every night afterwork (enough drinks for our counselor to tell me that he has a problem with alcohol). I know he has cleaned up bc he knows that I would bring up the pot issue in court.

Any thoughts or suggestions would be great.
Thanks.

Hello Everyone,

I would like all suggestions and thoughts. I am going to be going to trial soon for custody. I am making a list of the things that I am giong to ask for.

Please let me know of some things that you have in your order/custody plan. This could be regular things. Or issues that you feel, whether you are CP or NCP, are important. Things that you wish you had in you order. Things that you have had to go back to court over. Issues that weren'y properly clarified.

I thank you all for your suggestions. I have 2 toddlers, 1 & 3 years old.

Thanks.

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I have a question ya'll. How does documenting events, behavior and occurences help in the custody trial? Does the judge really take that info into consideration? Thanks.

Hello All, I am going through a divorce/custody right now. I have an attorney and filed for divorce in FL in the beginning of October. Following FL laws, both parents have custody bc we are still married. My husband wants to get our 1 year old son and 3 year old daughter one FULL week andhis house and then one FULL week at my house. I don't like this idea for several reason. First being, he is living with his mom and dad. His father smokes and both of our children have asthma and were hospitolized for RSV, (not related to papa's smoking) but it doesn't help their asthma for them to be around the smoke. Second, I have been the primary care provider and I as was stay-at-home mother since our son's birth. I think that the schedule he wants isn't good for such young children. And third, I think that he wants to get the kids more, so that when we go to court, he can tell the judge that he has the 50% of the time and doesn't need to pay me what the guidelines say (he made $67k last year and the guidelines say that he should be paying about $1600.00 a month). So, of course, he is having a cow about the amount. I had agreed on a temp amount bc I knew that his work was really slow and he also has his other child (10 year) to care for, he has sole custody of her and her bio-mom was declared indigent. I had my lawyer file a motion for an emergency hearing so I can get some form of a court order, but it was denied and referred to mediation. The only mediation appointment available was for the end of January and he said he has "training" that day. So now, we have to wait for the February calendar to open up. I am frustarted with all of this. Because we have no order and the way that he laws work, there is nothing I can do in regards to keeping the kids on a different schedule than the every other week thing. The schedule I want isnt too different. My husband has every other wed and sat off. So he has the kids on the weekend he has off and then the week that he has wed off, he picks them up on tuesday evening and bring them back thursday morning or takes them to their respective locations for school. I really don't like the schedule that he wants and I am afraid that if we have to go to court, the judge will rule in his favor bc its the schedule that has been in effect for the last 3 months given that there is nothing I can do.

Do you guys have any suggestions on what to do? I gave him a proposal to look over. He ansewred the petition with his counterpetition for divorce and the above schedule. I told him last night that he needs to give me a proposal back so when can try and duke something out without going to court. I won't have the money to keep a lawyer around if I have to go to court. I have never been through this stuff before, personally. I mean we dealt with things bc of my husbands ex-wife, but that was somewhat different.

K