I need your advice today!! I'm a newbie here.
DH has a situation...
SD hand delivered an Orthodontist quote for $300 (our half per BM) from BM yesterday (not in an envelope) during our visit with SD this weekend. You could tell that SD was a little uncomfortable with that, but we didn't say anything. Although DH just stood there staring at it, like he didn't know what it was!
Anyway...
Background: This is an expense that BM said she'd cover when we told her we couldn't afford it. We couldn't/can't afford it at the time, but also feel that SD needs to earn them. Braces are a big responsibility for the $$ and SD is showing NO responsiblity in her classes at school...she has failed at least 3 classes each report card this school year, since being back with her mom. SD was failing 4 classes each report card w/ BM when she came to us about this time last year. We are currently in court trying to address this situation.
Regardless, DH had a conversation with BM where he confirmed with her that she was not expecting any $$ from us and she said she wouldn't ask for anything...we assumed she agreed to this because she didn't provide support to us for SD with so much as two cents,while SD lived with us for 8 months out of the last school year and she KEPT 3 MONTHS of CS WHILE SD WAS IN OUR HOME!!!!!
Please note! WE DID NOT ASK FOR ONE THIN DIME for all of the counseling, psychiatrist visits, prescriptions and voice lessons that we provided SD while in our home, not even for general necessities! We thought she would offer...What a joke!
Anyway...DH and I are not sure how to respond to this 'Bill'.
Should DH...
1) Call her and tell her he's not sending anything? I was thinking we should put it in writing, although we do record conversations.
2) Send her a bill for 1/2 of the expenses that we incurred last year? and maybe a request of reimbursement of say...$250/mo in CS? We pay $450/mo and are not in arrears to this day! *My mischievous side likes this one* Can DH threaten to file for back CS for those 8 months?
3) Consult our attorney? (We do have one on retainer) per our current custody modification dispute.
Or.....
4) Just ignore it?
We don't want any $$ back from her really, (although it would be nice)...but we're not inclined to give her anything over support for quite some time, siting the above points. Do we have a leg to stand on?
NOTE: DH, BB and SD are being 'evaluated' by a psychologist right now per court order. We want to make sure that we do the right thing and the more adult thing, if you KWIM. Although doing the adult thing is a little harder than I thought it would be.
Please help, we're just not real sure what we should do.
Thanks for reading
DH has a situation...
SD hand delivered an Orthodontist quote for $300 (our half per BM) from BM yesterday (not in an envelope) during our visit with SD this weekend. You could tell that SD was a little uncomfortable with that, but we didn't say anything. Although DH just stood there staring at it, like he didn't know what it was!
Anyway...
Background: This is an expense that BM said she'd cover when we told her we couldn't afford it. We couldn't/can't afford it at the time, but also feel that SD needs to earn them. Braces are a big responsibility for the $$ and SD is showing NO responsiblity in her classes at school...she has failed at least 3 classes each report card this school year, since being back with her mom. SD was failing 4 classes each report card w/ BM when she came to us about this time last year. We are currently in court trying to address this situation.
Regardless, DH had a conversation with BM where he confirmed with her that she was not expecting any $$ from us and she said she wouldn't ask for anything...we assumed she agreed to this because she didn't provide support to us for SD with so much as two cents,while SD lived with us for 8 months out of the last school year and she KEPT 3 MONTHS of CS WHILE SD WAS IN OUR HOME!!!!!
Please note! WE DID NOT ASK FOR ONE THIN DIME for all of the counseling, psychiatrist visits, prescriptions and voice lessons that we provided SD while in our home, not even for general necessities! We thought she would offer...What a joke!
Anyway...DH and I are not sure how to respond to this 'Bill'.
Should DH...
1) Call her and tell her he's not sending anything? I was thinking we should put it in writing, although we do record conversations.
2) Send her a bill for 1/2 of the expenses that we incurred last year? and maybe a request of reimbursement of say...$250/mo in CS? We pay $450/mo and are not in arrears to this day! *My mischievous side likes this one* Can DH threaten to file for back CS for those 8 months?
3) Consult our attorney? (We do have one on retainer) per our current custody modification dispute.
Or.....
4) Just ignore it?
We don't want any $$ back from her really, (although it would be nice)...but we're not inclined to give her anything over support for quite some time, siting the above points. Do we have a leg to stand on?
NOTE: DH, BB and SD are being 'evaluated' by a psychologist right now per court order. We want to make sure that we do the right thing and the more adult thing, if you KWIM. Although doing the adult thing is a little harder than I thought it would be.
Please help, we're just not real sure what we should do.
Thanks for reading