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Topics - SLYarnell

#1
Its amazing how many names I remember, and how much I felt at home logging back in today!  SD graduates from high school in a couple weeks!  Can you believe it?  We had her guardianship termination hearing earlier this week and she is now an adult!  Her dad would be so proud of her.  I cant tell you how many times I wish he were here to see her today, its just what he had looked forward to all during that horrible fight for all those years. She is going to go on to school to study Art Therapy so she can help other kids that had the same sorts of struggles she did and I am encouraging her to sign up and become a CASA volunteer.  She would be amazing at it with all the experience she had growing up!.

But I have another issue that brought me here today again,  My sons exgirlfriend has decided to turn my 11 year old grandson over to his dad.  This will be voluntary and I was wondering if any of you had suggestions on wording to have her sign that will help him moving forward.  He understands he will have to deal with custody and child support on two different levels but wants to have some sort of document she can sign turning over custody.  I knew you good people would be full of suggestions!

Looking forward to catching up!

Sly/Shellie
#2
Dear Socrateaser / Guardianship, Trial over...
Jun 26, 2005, 09:36:29 PM
Soc,

We had the California guardianship where the guardians divorced due to domestic violence in the home and the "guardian father" moving all 6 children including SD into his parents home.

We filed to terminate for the 2nd time due to changed circumstances.

Well the hearing was the 20th and we lost yet again... The judge said in his ruling that he was sure my husband would be a "great dad" and he wanted to commend me on my testimony and stated my SD was "lucky" to have me as a mother figure BUT that due to the passage of time, and the fact that my 14yo SD wanted to stay where she was, he had to rule against us.

The lesson we have learned here is never ever ever assume that a guardianship will be temporary and you can have your child returned after you are back on your feet... in California your rights as a parent fall WAY down the line.

In one fell swoop my husband lost his wife (she died) and his daughter, she was hidden and abused for YEARS but because they managed to keep her long enough for her to bond they get to keep her...

Oh and BTW... they get about $1500 a month to have her there each and every month... not bad I would say!
#3
Dear Socrateaser / California Guardianship
May 16, 2005, 12:48:13 PM
Dear Soc,

I think you will remember we had the California guardianship where the host mom and dad ended up divorcing when the "mom" threw a knife at the "dad" causing a pretty severe injury. We filed to terminate based on changed circumstance and best interest of the child as there was also some indication that the "host mom" had previously at least threatened my SD with a knife as well.

There are documented reports of the "host mother" hearing voices and seeing spirits.

In the first hearing to terminate, the male guardian's lawyer stated that my SD (and the other 5 children) had been removed from the home and all were now living with him at his parents home. So the immediate danger had been resolved. The judge set another date in late June for a contested hearing. The judge said the question was, did the host father know that the "mom" was a danger to her children (and my SD) and only did something when he himself was injured, or, was he completely unaware of the situation, and moved the children away from the danger once he became aware.

We believe that his job as a teacher in California trains him to look for the signs of abuse, as he is a mandatory reporter of child abuse, and as such he HAD, or should have known and/or been aware. So what we want is some independent testimony, showing that he witnessed events that could only be described as abusive.

 My SD had a court appointed lawyer who resigned due to the inability to work with the "host mom". We want to subpoena her to testify.

I understand that there is lawyer/client privilege between my SD and her lawyer, My question is,  would we be able to subpoena this lawyer to question her along the lines of the contacts she had with the guardians? We believe she would testify to yelling and screaming and the continuing unwillingness of the husband to "control" the abusive actions of his wife.

Thanks for your time and opinions,

SLY
#4
Dear Socrateaser / Whats your opinion?
Oct 01, 2004, 12:13:14 PM
Soc,

I am sure you will remember we have the guardianship in California, we live in Washington St.

There has been a domestic violence incident and a divorce petition filed by the guardians.  SD is currently living with "host dad" and 5 children at the home of host dads parents, she did change schools with this move.  None of this information was shared with the court.

We wanted to file a new petition to terminate pro per due to the changed circumstances and were advised by a lawyer in that county that we shouldnt, that "they do things their way in that county" and that we couldnt win representing ourselves.

We did send a letter to the judge notifying all other parties as well so the judge would know we were concerned and not just doing nothing.

My Question:

1. Is it a given that we will lose if we file pro per?  We have done pretty well with this court on our own since trial after ditching our lawyer $45,000 later.

2.  Is there something we can do to improve our pro per chances?

It is my belief that if we do nothing we lose anyway, at least if we file we have a chance!
#5
Dear Socrateaser / When Guardians divorce
Sep 11, 2004, 11:48:40 PM
Dear Soc,

DH's daughter lives with guardians in California, recently we became aware of a DV assault (Assault with a deadly weapon) on the "host father" by the "host mother" "host father" has filed a Dissolution petition and restraining order.  It is the "host mother" that is the relation (second cousin) to the child.

1) Since the guardianship is in both names would a divorce affect the guardianship?

2) Should the violence in the family (one additional documented incident against SD) be enough to terminate against them both as the "host dad" allowed the violence for more than 4 years without protecting the children, bringing his judgement into question?  None of this was revealed during the custody battle!

3) Do you know of any California case law we can cite that deals with termination when the guardian is not doing a good job?

We will be filing Pro Per Monday a Petition to terminate.  I would love for you to read it and comment if you would?

Thanks again,

SLY
#6
Dear Soc,

You might remember,  DH has a California case where his daughter (13) lives with guardians as her mother is deceased.  
After a long expensive custody battle the "host parents" were awarded custody and child support of $898.00 a month and $50.00 monthly arrears. (Arrears were from date of filing DH was current with ordered support at time)  
Their income didn't matter nor did their expenses, support was figured on DH's income alone.
DH has now been laid off from his employer and the chance of him getting another job at the same income level could be slim.
I want him to file for a support modification, he says the court isn't going to care that he cant make the same wages, he has proven he has the "ability" to do so by doing it for the past 3 years.

Question:


We live in the Seattle area and the company he was laid off of is a major high dollar employer that it can be shown that even new employees are not being brought in like the past years hires were, the raises, bonuses and stock grants of the past are no more.

If he is looking for work at the same level and can show such, will the court consider a downward mod or are we wasting our time trying because they truly don't care?

Thank you!

Sly
#7
Custody Issues / Termination filing sent by fax
Nov 19, 2004, 10:27:38 AM
Lawmoe,

I had faxed you a copy of our filing for a court date that we have coming up very quickly.  I had also sent several emails.  Were you going to be able to offer any advise on what you received?  If not no problem I was just very interested in your thoughts.

Thank you

SLY
#8
Father's Issues / Hello Good People!
Jun 23, 2008, 06:15:51 PM
I thought I would stop by and check in!  In just a couple of months we will be facing the 2 year anniversary of my DH's death.  In some ways it seems like forever ago, and in some like it was yesterday!  Some of you will remember that just months after SD finally came to live with us, after a horrific, expensive custody battle with "host parents" (guardians) her dad was killed in a motorcycle accident in California.  I packed her up and she and I moved back to where I grew up and moved in with my mother.  Late last year we moved into our own place and have slowly begun putting the pieces back together.

I was granted full guardianship of her and we are very close.  She has a ton of guilt over not coming to live with us sooner but I tell her everyday how much her dad loved her and how proud he was of her!  She will be 18 in February and will be a senior in High School this fall.

We will in the next month be moving across the country from Oregon to New Hampshire.  I am involved in a new relationship and excited to make a fresh new start!  He has no children of his own and adores SD and she him!  They probably have more in common than she and I do and we are very much looking forward to being a family.  

I think of you all often and have sent several your way for advise and support.  You are all always so helpful!  I dont know what I would have done without you during our years long struggle.

Keep up the battle you make such a difference in peoples lives!

SLY
#9
Tuesday evening, 10/17 my DH was killed in a Motorcycle accident in California.  I cant find the words to express the loss we feel right now.  My SD had just 4 1/2 months living with her dad.  We cherish each and every moment but it is just soooo unfair that this should happen to us this soon after our oh so sweet victory.  He loved her so very much and was so looking forward to being there as she grew up... *sigh*

Choking back tears knowing how much of a shock this will be to those of you who have become so very special to me...
#10
Father's Issues / OMG I have NEWS!
Jul 20, 2006, 10:20:21 AM
Just last evening we got an email from SD's lawyer and the guardian has agreed to terminate the guardianship!!!  WOOOOHOOOO  I cant believe it!   9 YEARS I have been waiting for this day and its finally here.  SD has been with us for her 7 weeks this summer and she was to go back on Monday, now she doesnt have to.

A bit of an update to the story will most likely make it make sense to all you oldtimers that know what a struggle this has been for us.  Guardians got a divorce and now male guardian who retained custody of all the kids including my SD is remarrying.  SD was not happy with that idea as guardian told her she would have a new "mom" that she would "grow to love"  Also there would have been a total of 10 kids and 2 adults in the new family.

She is doing sooo well here this summer, she has settled in beautifully, she finished today with a 6 week summer Geometry class at the local college as a high school sophmore.  She has friends and has been attending her local church.

FINALLY we are gonna be a family that no one can disrupt ever again!

I cant say enough how all the advise and encouragement from all of you at SPARC got us thru this mess.  I couldnt have done it without all of you!

SLY/Shellie
#11
Fox Show Reunites Dad, Adopted Daughter
 
Dec 14, 6:39 PM (ET)

By DAVID BAUDER

NEW YORK (AP) - The Fox network said Tuesday it will air a special next month, "Who's Your Daddy?", where a daughter given up for adoption as an infant attempts to guess the identity of her birth father for a $100,000 prize.

Activists in the adoption community immediately attacked the special, which will air for 90 minutes on Jan. 3.

"This is really perverse," said Adam Pertman, executive director of the Evan P. Donaldson Adoption Institute, a research and policy organization. "It takes a deeply personal and important experience and turns it into a money-grubbing game show. I think it is despicable."

A Fox network spokesman would not comment on the special, referring all calls to the producers, who said people shouldn't judge before watching.

 
"I find it curious that people are calling it that without having seen an episode," said Scott Hallock, one of three executive producers of the series for the Fox Television Studios. "You might get the impression from the title that it is somehow salacious or exploitive. But nothing could be further from the truth."

The woman who is the focus of the show, not identified by Fox, and her birth father were both involved in simultaneous searches for each other.

Her natural dad will be one of eight men presented to her, all claiming to be her father. She will be given opportunities to observe and interview the men to narrow the field, the network announced.

If she correctly guesses which man is her father, the woman can win as much as $100,000. If she is incorrect, the imposter that she chose will win the money, Fox said.

Either way, the special will end with the father and daughter being reunited.

Joseph Kroll, executive director of the North American Council on Adoptable Children, called the idea "repulsive." He said his own 29-year-old daughter is searching for her birth father.

"If someone were to try doing that to my daughter, what I consider to be abuse, I would not behave appropriately," Kroll said.

Pertman, a former Boston Globe reporter and author of the book "Adoption Nation," predicted the television show would denigrate the experiences of families who have gone through adoption.

"It really is sort of one-stop shopping for insulting millions of people, maybe tens of millions," he said.

Producers have already filmed six "Who's Your Daddy?" episodes, although Fox has only scheduled one of them for air at this point. Hallock said participants were sought through ads that made it clear the solicitation was part of a TV production.

Viewers are invited to play the game along with the adoptive daughter; the father's real identity will not be made clear until the end of the show.

All the participants felt it was a positive experience, said Kevin Healey, another executive producer.

"Our main focus was to see that it would be a positive experience and we were determined not to go forward with it if that was not the case," Healey said.

Fox had been known to be working on the show for months. This past summer, in a public tiff with Fox over competing boxing reality shows, NBC chief executive Jeff Zucker revealed Fox was working on the concept. Angry that Zucker had discussed their internal plans, Fox executives wouldn't comment on it.



 
 
#12
'Family Rights' Radio Network Begins Broadcast: An Historic Event for the Family Movement


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MND NEWSWIRE
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DALLAS -- Richar' Farr describes his new Internet radio station as "a town hall meeting on radio." He calls it Kids' Rights Radio - KRights for short. Farr is the KRightsRadio.com founder and main on-air commentator. The unique station began its unusual and compelling broadcast on Aug 1, 2004, and is now on the air 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

"This is an exciting and historic event for fatherhood, children, and the family rights movement. It's a great leap forward. For years, noncustodial parents and their extended families have not been able to easily tell their stories in the media. On Aug. 1, 2004 this all changed. Now, we can start organizing the approximately 14 million noncustodial parents and their families into a huge listenership," said Farr.

KRightsRadio.com offers unique programming: fresh up-to-date reports, interviews, breaking news, and commentary on marriage, divorce, family, child support, paternity fraud, child custody, "visitation," parents - anything relevant. One of Farr's goals is to increase general public awareness of pervasive damaging stereotypes and policies that have led to adverse consequences for families and fatherhood, and therefore for taxpayers and society as a whole. Farr envisions KRightsRadio as an instrument for positive change.

Why a station devoted to children's and family rights?

Farr says, "There is a huge hunger and need for this. We're tapping into new territory." Farr added, "We anticipate a swift and tremendous reach. People in general will be fascinated with the surprising truths and astonishing stories that many will hear for the very first time. What is happening daily to good families is simply mind-boggling. Too many noncustodial parents, mostly fathers, are dead bolted, unfairly locked out of their children's lives. They need somewhere to air their grievances and work for positive change."

According to Farr, KRightsRadio.com's unique, and sometimes controversial, fresh programming is aimed to counterbalance a negative view of men and fathers that has become prevalent throughout our culture and society. He would also like policymakers and family experts to tune in. "Too many families and children are suffering under unfair policies that stand today. We're going to expose the injustices," says Farr.

Experts and scholars in the field, including attorneys, psychologists, researchers, activists, and others are being interviewed for the broadcast. Farr plans to interview celebrities and media correspondents covering issues of interest to KRightsRadio's target audience.

On KrightsRadio.com you'll hear stories like that of Texas dad, Morgan Wise, who was featured in a New York Times article and was interviewed on Fox News Channel's, "The O'Reilly Factor." After many years, Morgan Wise discovered that 3 of 4 of his beloved children were not his biologically. Amazingly, at one point, a family court judge issued an order preventing Morgan from visiting his children, including even his biological child, while enforcing a court order for child support.

"Not only are we hoping to be an information clearinghouse and become a voice for families, we are hoping to become a useful tool for grassroots activism and unity of effort. I'm starting a list of listeners - I call it a 'constituency list.' We know there are millions of us out here. Now we're going to prove it," said Farr.

Any radio station wishing to have access to the rapidly growing KRightsRadio.com audience and programming will be able to get the feed from the station by contacting Richard Farr at: 817-223-0126.

"The potential reach of this station is tremendous. There is a hunger for this information and for custodial and noncustodial families suffering in the family courts and child support agencies to have a voice. KRightsRadio.com fills a niche, and I expect it will continue to grow very rapidly. Farr has a major success on his hands," said news commentator Roger Crition.

For more information, visit http://www.krightsradio.com or e- mail Richar' Farr at: [email protected]

Click on "Broadcast Stream" to hear live programming at various times of day.

Richar' Farr is available for media interviews regarding the launch of KRightsRadio.com

Please call 330-534-8948 or send an e-mail to [email protected] to arrange an interview.

#13
LEGAL ABUSE SYNDROME  
http://www.familyrightsassociation.com/books/legal_abuse/
#14
Attached please find a Notice of Public Hearing relative to the Joint
Commission to Evaluate the Model Code of Judicial Conduct's upcoming
roundtable discussion in Naples, FL. Thank you.

 <>

Maggie

Maggie J. Viertel
Editorial/Legal Assistant
ABA Center for Professional Responsibility
Ethics Department
321 N. Clark Street
Chicago, IL 60610
(312) 988-5326
(312) 988-5491
[email protected]

Visit us on the web at //www.abanet.org/cpr/prconf.html
 for details about the ABA 30th National
Conference on Professional Responsibility and 20th National Forum on Client
Protection, June 2 - 5, 2004, Naples, Florida.

 

NOTICE OF PUBLIC HEARING

From Mark I. Harrison, Chair, ABA Joint Commission on Evaluation of the Model

Code of Judicial Conduct

The ABA Joint Commission on Evaluation of the Model Code of Judicial Conduct will hold the fifth in a series of public hearings to obtain comments and suggestions relating to the present Code on Friday, 4, 2004 from 2:00 p.m. until 5:00 p.m.

This hearing will take place Friday, June 4, 2004 in conjunction with the ABA National Conference on Professional Responsibility at The Registry Resort, located at 475 Seagate Drive, Naples, Florida 34103. The phone number is 800-247-9810. Individuals or organizations interested in appearing at this hearing to provide the Commission with their views on the present Code and/or suggestions for its improvement are invited to contact Commission Counsel Eileen Gallagher at or (312) 988-5105 no later than May 28, 2004. This will allow time to schedule all persons interested in appearing on June 4.

An electronic version of your proposed comments should be submitted by May 28, 2004. Where possible, please identify the provisions of the current Judicial Code being addressed. If you intend to recommend that the provisions be changed, please provide language that you believe would accomplish your intended purpose. (Written submissions may also be submitted in lieu of oral testimony.) All information may be sent by May 28 to Ms. Gallagher, via e-mail or in hard copy to the ABA Justice Center, located at 321 N. Clark Street, Chicago, Illinois 606l0. E-mail transmissions are greatly preferred.

An attempt will be made to accommodate all appearance requests. However, preference will be given to parties for whom geographic concerns make it imperative that they appear at the Naples hearing; other individuals or entities may wish to schedule appearances at hearings that will be held elsewhere at a later date. According to the Commission's current schedule, an additional hearing will be held at the ABA Annual Meeting in Atlanta, GA on August 6.

During this hearing in Naples, the Joint Commission will begin examining issues that have already been brought to its attention, including but not limited to the following:

· Could the format and organization of the Code be improved?

· How should the concept of "appearance of impropriety" be addressed in the Code?

· Are Code changes needed to accommodate the increase in "pro se" representation?

· What types of statements should judges be permitted to make, especially as judicial candidates, during or independent of campaigning for office?

· What significance should attach to the statements, affiliations or interests of members of a judge's family, and to which members?

· Should judges assigned to "family," "drug," or other "restorative justice" or "problem-solving" courts be authorized to participate as members of or interact with a wider range of community organizations?

· Are the limitations on judges' involvement with civic, charitable, educational, and other organizations appropriate and necessary?


#15
Father's Issues / custody newsletter archive
May 18, 2004, 07:19:13 PM
I was just going through my bookmarks and ran across some VERY good custodys newsletters at:

http://www.pace-custody.org/custody.html

There is a large variety of very useful info here.  This would really help those going it on their own.
#16
Father's Issues / Media Opportunity
Apr 14, 2004, 04:48:32 PM
I received this today in email...

I am a Tv producer of ON SECOND THOUGHT, a local Tv show about to go up
on a Satelite Channel nation-wide.  This May-June I am preparing a New
Fathers Day Tv special.

I am seeking NON-Custodial Dad stories from many different states, to run
on a 1 hour special, dealing with the UNjust system of "Family Court", which
as most of us have come to understand to our regret is systematic INjustice,
bringing back imputed DEBTOR PRISONS, criminalization of Fathers who attempt
to continue to have a Father-child relationship, and basic enslavement,
leaving many good Dads homeless, or undersheltered, penniless, and bitter...

I am looking for stories, especially in Tenn., Kentucky and Georgia.

Most Americans don't realize HOW twisted and bias the Courts are against
Dads.  This 1 hour special will have Prof. Baskerville and dozens of Dads
from dozens of States.

With 100,000 Dads sitting in jails at any given week for "contempt of
Court," the situation has become intolerable.   Neither I, nor you, alone
can do much about it.  But it is my hope that this Tv special will wake up
other judges and the public to stop cruxcifying Dads on the flimsiest
allegations, without trial by jury, without substantiated facts, on just
one womans accusations.

If your interested, email me at:

OnSecond.Thought (at) verizon.net

William J. Wagener

#17
The Monitor is running a reader poll next to the article on the question: "Is there a need for a men's rights movement in the United States?" The possible answers are "No. Men still enjoy a privileged position" and "Yes. Casual male-bashing has become too commonplace."  The current vote is 70% to 30% in favor of a men's movement.


The link to the article is below... Go Vote!

http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0331/p16s01-lihc.html