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Topics - socrateaser

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Dear Socrateaser / Custody Evaluation results
« on: Apr 30, 2007, 07:23:58 AM »
My stbx and I signed an agreement that we would share custody of our 8 YO daughter 50:50 and had our attorneys witness it before I moved out of the house. For 5 months, everything's been great and my daughter is thriving.

STBX decided to sue for custody and we agreed to custody evaluation. She provided a list of evaluators and we accepted one from the list.

Evaluaton report says that she has several personality disorders (Histrionic Personality Disorder and Narcissistiic Personality Disorder) as well as several elevated MMPI-2 scales which indicate a lack of truthfulness and distorted view of reality. No disorders for me.

Still, evaluator found that both parents are capable of raising daughter and recommended that the current 50:50 schedule be maintained.

STBX goes ballistic over report and says she wants a second opinion. Is it likely that the judge will allow it?


Dear Socrateaser / Career Change / Imputing Income
« on: Feb 27, 2007, 09:40:08 AM »
I understand that if a court finds the non-custodial parent is deliberately unemployed or underemployed it can impute income for support purposes.

1.  If a reduction in income is from a legitimate career change (not for the purpose of reducing support), could some sort of 'equal protection' challenge to imputed income be viable?  After all, married parents can change careers or switch jobs with the resultant impact on their children.

Thanks, Soc.

Dear Socrateaser / Moving- notices
« on: Feb 22, 2007, 06:17:53 AM »
Hi Soc-

CP and Child live in TN. Child a resident 6 months come tomorrow. NCP mother lives in Va.

Mother relocated last month without giving written 30 days notice as required by the court order. She did however give my wife the new address about 2 weeks after calling from the new home number.

I just signed a lease on a home Saturday. I sent a letter by certified mail to the mother, cc a copy to the family court and circuit courts in Va today notifying her that as of March 2007 the physical address will change.  My wife told NCP last night that we were moving soon and to expect a letter in the mail.

I plan to move my belongings into our new home this weekend. As you can calculate that's also not giving a 30 days' advance notice to the other party or court. I can't afford both places, so I need to move this weekend- and will continue to clean the apartment through the end of this month. I don't want to be in contempt but I am providing my daughter and other children with a much needed larger home. And I've given her as much notice as possible in this situation.

1. If NCP wants to try to get me for contempt, will TN or VA have jurisdiction?

2. Do you think contempt is likely, given I have provided her with as much notice as I possibly could and couldn't afford to pay for both places?

3. Will the courts consider that she moved without providing the same notice required by the order?

4. Do you have any ideas short of paying for rent in both places for the month of March to help this situation?

Thanks Soc- I have finally been able to provide my family with the home they deserve and don't want to screw this up with my daughter and the courts.

Dear Socrateaser / Confused about outcome
« on: Dec 02, 2006, 07:59:31 AM »
Hi Soc,

All parties and order are in PA.  I have been NCM for 6 years, divcorced for 9.  There have been numerous court actions.  We have been through two custody evals and worked with two different mediators.

I wrote about six weeks ago concerning a petition my X filed in which he claimed the children said my DH was drinking and driving them around in the car.

 My vistis were also inavertantly suspended by the judge then reinstated when my lawyer realized what had happened.  The judge claimed he never meant to suspend them that he had not read the order prepared by OC and thought he was just setting a hearing date.

The hearing was today.  The attorneys spoke to the judge in chambers.  Then the attorneys and the children spoke with the judge in chambers. Then we all went into the court room and the judge issued his order.

He has ordered that the children DS 17 and DD14 have a GAL with whom to voice thier concerns.  No Hearing was held.  No questioning, no cross examination. No other changes to the order.

The judge also spoke to both X and I off the record.  He admonished X for sharing motions, orders custody evals etc with the children.  He told me not to read my children's email or pose as them online ( which I have never done and this was news to me).

He was upset that the counseling he ordered between X and I in Februray 06 has resulted in only two joint sessions thus far.

  He admonished X for blowing off a session last week and me for cancelling one prior in which the X was going to include the children without my knowledge or consent.  The therapist called to inform me that the children "may" be there.  I asked her what the goals were and she couldn't answer.  I told her I felt the adults needed to work out a few things before bringing in the children and she agreed.  SHE cancelled the session and my lawyer was involved in this.

The judge said he did not want the children to be cross examined which would have been necessary to discern the thruth of what they were alledging about my Dh driving drunk with them in the car.  No more was said about this issue at all.

X had asked for "safegaurds to be put in place and for the children to not be at my home when I'm not here."  None of that was addressed.

I had an adult witness who was with Dh and kids that night ready to testify that he was not driniking and that the vist went normally.  I aslo spoke to the children during the visit by phone and was going to testify that they never said there were any problems and that dad called during the visit but still allowed DH to drive the chidren to the drop off point at the end of the visit.


What do you suppose the judge hopes to gain by appointing the GAL?

Is the GAL going to be a sort of permenant evalautor from now on?

How does the GAL fit in with the counsleor who is supposed to work with X and I?

Did I win or loose this round becasue I don't know?

Dear Socrateaser / No response
« on: Nov 02, 2006, 02:53:24 PM »
State of GA

Forty-four days ago, I filed a lawsuit for damages against my ex.

It included:
1 - a verified complaint
2 - a summons (based on standard form provided by Georgia's court sysem)
3 - sherrif's acknowledgment of service (again, a form)

She was personally served by the sheriff just 2 days following its filing.

The documents have been checked and double-checked for accuracy.

As of today, I have received no response. State law permits me to file a motion for default judgment after 30 days if no response has been forthcoming. Before I do that, I want to stand back and look at the situation and see if there is something which I may be missing. She may or may not have an attorney. Her father has been involved as both plaintiff and defendant in 28 separate civil lawsuits in just 12 years and has always been pro se, and he may have counciled her to do the same. He also has a strong history of not responding to motions and not showing up for hearings. (He has lost more than he has won.)


Based on what I have said, do you readily see any pitfall into which my complaint may have fallen so as to not obligate her to respond in any way?

I understand that the issue of service and a summons is crucial to beginning each case and paid particular attention to these details. I just don't want to assume that she's willing to have a default judgment against her, and want to explore any avenues before filing it.

I live in VA, but the child lives in FL with the CP.

One of the most important points of my motion to clarify was how transportation was to be split up.

The original stipulation read:

Both parents shall be responsible for the financial and physical transportation of the child...

Original arrangement by CP and I had to accomodate this:

I'd buy the tickets and CP would reimburse me, since CP claims that they don't have a debit or credit card with a visa logo.  

Problem with that arrangement:

CP would delay reimbursing me.

My action:

I told CP that I couldn't do this anymore, as not being reimbursed on time posed a problem for me.

Additional problems: I have now emailed the CP to tell them that I would like to figure out transportation arrangments between us, but she is not responding to my emails. The last few certified emails leading up to my motion to clarify were deliberately returned unopened. (I know that CP is there though).

My question is as follows:

1) How can I make transportation arrangements with the CP when they refuse to communicate?

2) How can I avoid buying the same plane ticket as the ex? I guess I can't

Thanks Soc!

This is going to be long. Va case. Mother filed to term father's rights, father filed show causes,mother dropped case, father filed to amend custody. GAL recomemnded custody reversal to Father, Father resides in TN. with child.  Mother found guilty of contempt. Mother is now represented by counsel, Father is currently unrepresented. Mother filed appeal. Hearing set for Nov 20. The following was recieved today, postmarked 16th.

1. Describe in detail your current residence, providing in your description the size of the home, number of bedrooms, number of bathrooms, lot size and whether you rent or own your home.

2. Identify any and all persons who reside with you in your home, including in your description each such person's full name, age and realtionship to you.

3. Describe in detail and all changes in circumstances occuring since entry of the consent order on August 25, 2005, that support your request that (child) be in your primary custody.

4. If you contend that (her client) is not a proper custodian for (child), describe in detail each and every fact supporting that contention.

5. Identify each person who has any knowledge of the matters disclosed in your answer to Interog #4 above , providing for each his or her full name, address, telephone nymber and summary of the matters about which he or she has knowledge.

6. If you ever pleaded guilty or no contest to, or been convicted of, a felony or a crime involving moral turpitude (for example, lying, cheating, stealing, bad checks, etcetera) describe said felony or crime in detail , including the charge(s) and the date(s) of the offense.

7. For all insurance policies owned by you or in which you have an interest, provide the following information:
name and addy of insu co
type of policy(med, life, whole, term, universal,)
policy number
current balance of any loan against policy
face value
present cash value

8. Identify and describe each employment position you have held during the past 3 years, including, but not limited to, a complete descripton of your employer's name and address, your position, the dates of service, your annual salary, the number of hours worked, any bonuses, commissions or other compensation recieved, any fringe benefits/perquitsites recieved, including but not limited to, insurance coverage, retirement or profit sharing, travel pay, vacation and sick leave accrued and if your current employer utilizes a stndard promotion or salary review schedule, state the approximate dates of your future promotion or reviews and the increwments in salary antipatedd on those dates.

9. Describe in detail all fringe benefits (not previously described to Inter 8 above) available to you through your employment(such as automobile expense, credit cards, medical insurance or reimbursement, life insurance, expense acct, stock option, bonuses, etc.

10. Identify fully all sources of income(excluding employment listed in response to Inter #8 above) (taxable and non taxable) received during the last 3 years up to your response to the interogatory, including but not limited to, royalties, dividends, rent, pension, social security, disability, interests, trusts, investments, inheritents, and the like. Include in your response the sourse of the income, the frequency and the amount of the payments, the date of the payments commenced and teminated, if appropraite, and the total amount of payments received in each of the previous (3 )years

11 Identify each and every location wher eyou have resided since the birth of your daughter (child's name) providing the full address and dates of residency for each such location.

12 Identify the name of any expert you expect to call to testify as an expert witness at any hearing or trial in this matter, the subject matter on which the expert is expected to testify, and the substance of the facts and opinions to which the expert is expected to testofy as well as a summary of the grounds for each opinion.

13 Identify the counselor from whom (child's name) is currently receiving counseling,providing that person's full name, address, telephone number and the date that (child name) began such counseling.

Pursuant to supreme court of VA it says we have to submit the following within 21 days:

1. Copies of individual federal and state income tax returns with all schedules and attachments for the years 2004 to present.

2 Copies of your W-2 forms and 1099 forms received from all income for the years 2004 to the present.

3. Copies of your 3 most present pay stubs or equivalent.

4. Copies of all federal and state income tax returns with all schedules and attachments filed on behalf of any busness entity in which you have an ownership interest for years 2004 to present.

5 Copies of all bank statements, savings and loan statements, money market acct statements, and other statements issued by financial inst. reflecting fiancnial transactions in accts bearing your name either soley or jointly with others for borth personal and business use from Jan 1, 2006 to the present.

6. Copies of any medical, dental and life insurance policies insuring you and/or (child) or in which you have any interest.

7 A copy of the medical insurance card for(child).

8. A copy of the resume for any expert you intend to call as a witness at any proceeding in this matter.

9 The following documents relating to any real property currently owned by you individually or jointly with any other persons or entities:
deeds of trust or mortgages:
promisary notes an
settlement statements

10 Copies of any leases on which you are any way liable, whether in your name individually or jointly with any other person

11. Copies of any reports or writings produed by persons you expect to call as experts in this case.

12 Copies of all medical records of any type for any treatment you have recieved since Jan 1, 2005

13  Copies of all  medical and mental health records of any type for any treatment that (child) has recieved while in your care since Jan 1, 2005.

14. A copy of any credit report for you obtained or requested since jan 1, 2005.

15. A copy of (child's) report card, as well as any other reports or correspondence related to (child) recieved from school.

16. A copy of the 06-07 school calendar for the school (child) is currently attending.

17 Copies of any and all documentation of any child care expenses incurred for (child)

18 Copies of any and all documentation reflecting the current cost for medical insurance for (child).

19 Copies of your telephone records(land and mobile lines) for the time period Aug 2005- present.

1. What happens If I can not provide all the requested information within the 21 day limit?

2. Is it legal to ask for this information?

3. Personal information, such as my bank account numbers, social security numbers for family members on tax returns, etc- can I black those out for security purposes? The mother has been known to steal and associate with criminals who have been incarcerated for identity theft and bad checks, etc and I do not want my or my children/wife's information to become a public free for all.

4. Can I send my own interrogatorry and ask for the same and other information, such as specific records such as social security(to prove her brain injury is what qualifies her for the ssd) or court records where her mother was granted guardianship over her because of her inability to care for herself(brain injury)?
4a if so, how do you word that?

5. I have a phone consult scheduled with an atty, but it's not until the time limit expires, what can I do in the meantime- without royally screwing up the case?

6. The times and dates listed on the interogatorry- are those limited by law or is her attorney specifically looking for something and limiting it to those dates?

7. If I don't know the answers, can I answer I do not have the answer for that question or unknown, not at this time, etc?  

8. Can I legally ask for her to answer questions about prior marriages- to whom(name), date of marriage, place of, date of divorce, name of current spouse or significant other(want her to state on record she is either fiance' of the drughead or lie and say she isn't with him).

9. At what point in the interogatorry can I refuse to answer and write that  this is irrelevant or is that not allowed?

10. Is there anywhere on the web that I can find information about this process, so that I can do some research done?
Thank you for your help. I don't want to lose my daughter because of  technicalities.

Dear Socrateaser / Question about Ex With Protective Order
« on: Sep 27, 2006, 08:50:47 AM »
I have an ex who practices parental alienation with the best of them. As part of her effort, she obtained a Temporary Protective Order for stalking in response to my many requests to see my child, whom she was withholding from me. The judge was just disinteresting enough in the hearing to grant a 12-Month order.

Following the issuance of the 12-Month TPO, my ex filed two separate charges against me, alleging two separate violations of the order. While I faced these, she petitioned to have the 12-month order made permanent. The sole basis of her motion (and the sole evidence) was the 2 charges she had filed against me. On the same basis (explicity stated in the order), the judge made the order permanent.

In both instances of allegations, my ex lacked probably cause to bring the charge. Georgia law defines probably cause for someone to bring a charge as something that reasonable person would believe constituted a violation of the order. The dismissal constitutes a prima facie lack of probably cause, but it can be overcome. In this case, it can be shown that, although the ex had an attorney and had actually been with him just hours before she filed the charge, she failed to seek his council on the matter, perhaps even intentionally, because she was motivated more by malice than justice. In fact, the dismissal order itself incredibly includes statements made by her attorney which undermined her claims and shows that she filed the charge without his advise or approval. Due to one of her charges, I spent two weeks in jail.

Followed the issuance of the Permanent Order, both of the charges against me were dismissed in my favor.

1 - Due to the basis of both the motion and the order, namely the two charges against me, isn't it logical that the subsequent dismissal of these charges represents a substantial change in circumstances in which the material facts of the case no longer represents the required finding? And, as such, is there not solid grounds for a termination of the order on this finding?

2 - In addition to the above-stated reason, I have other concerns about the continuation of the Order. First, my ex continues to undermine the order herself by calling me, emailing me, sending me text messages, approaching me in public, and fraternizing with me. In all instances, she initiates the contact and it is unsolicited. (I am very particular not to violate the order myself.) Doesn't this, also, vitiate the order to a point beyond further justification of it? My other concern is that the repeated charges which she has brought, and which have been dropped, demonstrate a pattern of abuse of the order. Would not a judge, too, share these concerns and agree, along with #1 above, agree that the order should be terminated?

2 - Lacking probably cause on one of the charges, and having spent two weeks in jail because of her charge, is there not a good cause of action for a false imprisonment lawsuit against the ex?

3 - The order says that I am not to contact, directly or indirectly, my ex or her "immediate family". (It's a "form" order and that's all it says in regards to the matter, essentially.) How does that affect my relationship with my daughter? For the purposes of this order, am I also prohibited from contacting her? And, if so, wouldn't the fact that it is a permanent order for all intents and purposes constitute the termination of my parental rights without any hearing of fitness? Certainly such wording refers only to her OWN immediately family (parents, siblings, etc) without affecting my relationship with my daughter.

Much thanks

Dear Socrateaser / Seeking ideas on questions to ask witnesses
« on: Sep 21, 2006, 03:34:00 PM »

I go to court next week for motion against my ex.  Daughter found a camera in the bathroom at her fathers house and we are seeking a change in visitation.  

The detective that investigated did not find evidence therefore there was nothing that they could do.  Protective services could do nothing as they did not have any evidence.  Which basically now it is my daughters word against her dads.  The counselor is on our side, the detective said that he believed my daughter but there was no evidence.  The protective servicces worker said she believes my daughter but there is no evidece.

Will be calling the detective, protective services worker and the counselor into court as witnesses.  

1)  What questions would you recommend that be asked of these witnesses?  

Dear Socrateaser / Child support court date
« on: Sep 20, 2006, 03:42:38 PM »

IN state

Hubby changed jobs in April this year, last pay under a WH oder was 5/5.  Previous employer was court ordered to alert CSE when employee terminates employment adn who new employer is.  DH waited from 5/5 to 6/19 to see if new CS WH order came into play.  Since new job, he was on different pay periods and had to wait a month to get a paycheck and fist pay was not a full pay, waited to second pay when no WH order was in place DH resumed and paid all CS and has continued to do so to date.  BM filed 6/30 that BF failed/refused to pay CS, yet on 6/15 1 month of cs was paid in cash to clerk and she was sent a check on 6/19.  As I see it - a false filing.

Our attorney sent hers a fax 7/7 & 8/16 that stated that any lag was due to the WH oder and change in jobs etc, however the state ledger showed all as paid and current.  As of taday I am one week ahead.

There has only been one response from her attorney and that was a 6 weeks period that BM claims she was not paid.  

At no time did any payment go over $500 in arrears, and according to state there was never any failure or refusal to pay although no one will put that in writing.  In that it might make some difference, during this time frame of new job, my son had emergency surgery, we had to move and once moved BM showed up and caused a ruckus with our new apartment manager that resulted in them needing our attorney's info to perhaps file a restraining order on her for harassment of tenants on private property.

I have all receipts and paychecks to show that CS has been paid since last court order in 03 and the only lapse was the new job thing and situation noted above.  

1. Given the above situation, do you think I have anything to worry about?  

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