Basically I am here (I just signed up today) to gain a better understanding of my whole situation.
I am the step-parent in this situation. My husbands daughter lives on the west coast with her mother and we live on the east coast. I am extremely frustrated by the whole situation. We are a young couple (in our mid 20s) my husbands daughter is 5. He really hates this situation so he avoids it as much as he can. I try to explain to him that this isn't something he can ignore and that he needs to do everything that he can. He tells me that he wishes someone who's been in his situation could explain to me how he feels and that it's not something I can help him with. Basically he feels that I can never understand how he feels because I'm not the one who doesn't have visitation with their child. To explain that last sentence my husband has 2 scheduled phone calls with his daughter a week and according to the decree of divorce visitation starting with 2 (1)week long visits from here to there (a more concrete schedule to be decided in meditation which didn't work because the mother won't agree on anything). We have gone there once to visit so far and out of 8 days and 7 nights the mother allowed us a total of 17 and 1/2 hours of time with his daughter. This discouraged my husband a lot. Now the mother is saying that he needs to have visitation in front of a mediator to ensure the daughters safety, can she do this as it's not court ordered? He has never been violent or done anything to cause a need to ensure her safety.
Am I doing the right thing by seeking answers to his questions and getting him paperwork when I can and offering advice and support or am I totally in the wrong? Any advice and support offered would be appreciated more that words can express. Thanks
I am the step-parent in this situation. My husbands daughter lives on the west coast with her mother and we live on the east coast. I am extremely frustrated by the whole situation. We are a young couple (in our mid 20s) my husbands daughter is 5. He really hates this situation so he avoids it as much as he can. I try to explain to him that this isn't something he can ignore and that he needs to do everything that he can. He tells me that he wishes someone who's been in his situation could explain to me how he feels and that it's not something I can help him with. Basically he feels that I can never understand how he feels because I'm not the one who doesn't have visitation with their child. To explain that last sentence my husband has 2 scheduled phone calls with his daughter a week and according to the decree of divorce visitation starting with 2 (1)week long visits from here to there (a more concrete schedule to be decided in meditation which didn't work because the mother won't agree on anything). We have gone there once to visit so far and out of 8 days and 7 nights the mother allowed us a total of 17 and 1/2 hours of time with his daughter. This discouraged my husband a lot. Now the mother is saying that he needs to have visitation in front of a mediator to ensure the daughters safety, can she do this as it's not court ordered? He has never been violent or done anything to cause a need to ensure her safety.
Am I doing the right thing by seeking answers to his questions and getting him paperwork when I can and offering advice and support or am I totally in the wrong? Any advice and support offered would be appreciated more that words can express. Thanks