Ok we live in a small juridiction. Two judges and a special master who handle family cases and two mediators. One of the mediators was our initial one and bm walked out after 5 minutes when he told her we'd both have to make compromises. (By the way, mediation is confidential in our district) The other mediator used to be our parenting coordinator until she quit.
So d will be going to school in August. We have joint custody but she's residential and they live 2+ hrs away. So her attorney contacts me and wants to know if I would agree to mediation (which our order states we must do) with the judge who is not the judge assigned to our case. I consult two attorneys (my former one retired) Both are stating I pretty much need to agree to this and the 2nd is trying to see what parameters her attorney is suggesting. (with or without attorneys present) Now when we mediated before we were both in a room together and it was a disaster but I guess that when the judges do this (and in thisjuridiction it isn't common for this particular process to be done for family cases) we're put in separate rooms and the judge goes back and forth and triesto get an agreement mediated and from what I'm told kind of using strong arm tactics.
Second attorney tells me I wil need to make a conscious effort to mediate but I don't have to agree to anything but in this case if one party doesn't negotiate in good faith our judge of record will know it.
So for anyone who has been in this type of mediation----I'm asking for guidance. I've got a written proposal I submitted to her that she refused outright. I have a lot of documentation---pretty relevant documentation---do I go in with it? Or do I just go in with 2 or 3 scenarios I can live with and leave it at that? I layed out my case to have custody reversed and he said he doesn't see it happening just based on that but if she refuses to mediate in good faith it could swing my direction but first things first. For anyone that's been there done that any guidance and insight would be appreciated.
So d will be going to school in August. We have joint custody but she's residential and they live 2+ hrs away. So her attorney contacts me and wants to know if I would agree to mediation (which our order states we must do) with the judge who is not the judge assigned to our case. I consult two attorneys (my former one retired) Both are stating I pretty much need to agree to this and the 2nd is trying to see what parameters her attorney is suggesting. (with or without attorneys present) Now when we mediated before we were both in a room together and it was a disaster but I guess that when the judges do this (and in thisjuridiction it isn't common for this particular process to be done for family cases) we're put in separate rooms and the judge goes back and forth and triesto get an agreement mediated and from what I'm told kind of using strong arm tactics.
Second attorney tells me I wil need to make a conscious effort to mediate but I don't have to agree to anything but in this case if one party doesn't negotiate in good faith our judge of record will know it.
So for anyone who has been in this type of mediation----I'm asking for guidance. I've got a written proposal I submitted to her that she refused outright. I have a lot of documentation---pretty relevant documentation---do I go in with it? Or do I just go in with 2 or 3 scenarios I can live with and leave it at that? I layed out my case to have custody reversed and he said he doesn't see it happening just based on that but if she refuses to mediate in good faith it could swing my direction but first things first. For anyone that's been there done that any guidance and insight would be appreciated.