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Topics - daisygirl0825

Pages: 1
1
Custody Issues / Case went sideways.....
« on: Dec 05, 2012, 11:51:04 AM »
My attorney said mediation would be best, so a continuance was filed.  I agreed to all of the terms his lawyer sent over and thought we would be good.  I was really really wrong.
 
Ex is now claiming that my husband claimed to remove child from the country and never return her.  They are asking for her passport to be immediately turned over to them and for restricted visitation of one weekend a month and no more than one week at a time during the summer.  When she does visit, they need a written 14 day notice of where we will be during the time she is here for their approval.  I am super frustrated because my husband has never spoken to my ex.  My ex said to prove you did not and that is where I am stuck.  How do I prove that my husband is innocent? 
 
Daughter came down last weekend and was asking very odd questions about how I felt about the court case.  I asked her if Dad wanted her to take this information back to him and she said yes.  I told her I would not answer any questions because this should not include her.  She became very quiet and reserved after that.  Shortly after she started asking me the questions by text even though she was sitting right by me.  I did not respond and told her to stop.  I never thought it would go this way.
 
I just do not understand this.  She lived with me until August of this year.  We took a family vacation out of the country in July and came back without incident.  My attorney said we would be best to just go with giving over the passport and see if they will forego the limited visitation.  Is that a good plan or is the attorney just trying to prevent court?  In many ways I feel like going to court could not hurt me at this point because agreeing to the terms is not what I want.

2
Custody Issues / Trying to do the right thing
« on: Oct 31, 2012, 09:37:20 AM »
Hello All,
 
I was a custodial parent until recently.  Daughter wanted to move in with Dad cause she wanted to get to know him.  After reading several articles and postings, I agreed because a strong relationship with Dad is good for the child.  We signed an agreement for the interim period until everything went to court.  He is understandably upset that I have not sent him a monthly check for the child support he is paying, but all legal advice said that if I paid him directly, it would be considered a gift in the State of Texas.  All monies have been set aside and are ready for immediate payment after the court hearing. He is not satisfied with this.
 
My issue with what he wants is regarding the rights as primary parent.  He wants all of the stipulations I put in the original decree 10 years ago put on me as the secondary parent.  10 years ago was a very different situation, he had just gotten out of a mental institution, had been arrested for beating on my windows with a loaded gun and trying to kill himself in the presence of the two year old child.  I have not done those things, so I refused to sign an order that his attorney drew up.  I asked that all those stipulations be taken out, and they will not agree.  Our last point of contention is the ability to move without regard to geographical location.  I had put that in the decree because I was living with my parents at the time and he wanted that I could not move out of their house.  I love my parents, but wanted to eventually move into a place of my own.  He wants to be able to move anywhere he wants and I do not agree.
 
Since he lives 400 miles from me, daughter will continue flying back and forth.  In his presented papers, he wants it stated that I will be responsible to pick her up from his house.  He is notorious for telling me if it is in the decree, that is what we will follow.  I am afraid if the language is that way, it will come back to bite me.
 
Yesterday I was served with papers for a court hearing.  It says I am difficult and unresponsive and therefore they are asking for attorney's fees and for sole custody.  I had one letter from his attorney, which I responded to with my concerns and never heard anything back.  I have seen daughter only once since she left and he tried to pick her up the day after she came to my house.  I had to threaten to call the police for trespass to prevent him from showing up.  He will not commit to a holiday schedule so I do not know when I would see daughter for the holidays.
 
Is it in my best interest to fight for custody of daughter and remain the primary parent?  I am very much on the fence about this because I am having a very difficult time seperating my emotions from my reasonable side. 
 
Since the time of custody exchange, I have found out that he did not leave his current position and he is not home 3 weeks of the month so step mom is raising her.  The largest point of contention with this is we do not get along at all.  When daughter and I got into an argument on the phone step mom took the phone and ended the conversation.  Explained when I could be rational and talk to daughter as an adult (she is 12) then she would determine if I could continue the conversation.  Needless to say, this infuritated me adn I have not called back.  I have a meeting with the attorney tomorrow, I just need some objective advice on how to proceed.  I am afraid I am too close to the situation to see clearly and make good calls.
 
Thank You

3
General Issues / Dad will not communicate with Daughter..
« on: May 22, 2011, 07:56:01 PM »
I am starting a new thread because this is just getting so silly I do not understand it.
 
Daughter has not spoken to Dad for three months.  Dad refuses to call, or says says the new wife, because he will not be bullied by me or a child throwing a temper tantrum.  New wife sent a text stating "you cannot interfere with my legal right of possession."  Daughter had to ask me what it meant and then was mad because she feels like she has no rights.  Daughter is almost eleven and refused to go on the last visitation without Dad calling.  Needless to say, we did not go.  I sent a registered letter Dad signed for and no call.  Daughter got hurt at school bad enough to go to ER, she is fine now, texted and emailed Dad and asked him to call her, no response. 
 
Got a letter from Dad/ new wife, that they will not pay medical bills and not call daughter because I did not force daughter to go.  Medical bills I already paid so I can live with that, daughter believes Dad has no love for her at all because he will not contact her.   Any suggestions how to try and make this work?  Do I just force her into the car and make her go?  I want her to have at least one parent she trusts and I am not sure what the right answer is.  I have read many cases about making kids go back to CP against the kids wishes and the results all sound so sad for the kids.  I know I cannot make him call, so any suggestions are helpful.
 
Thank You
 

4
Visitation Issues / Question about Mediator's Position?
« on: Apr 27, 2011, 08:09:43 PM »
Hello All,
 
I have searched the forums looking for an answer and have not found an answer.  My ex husband wanted to do mediation with his attorney as mediatior.  I agreed to talk and have not signed anything.  His attorney asked that I pay for six plane tickets a year and six he will pay for.  This means that the child will be flying twice a month on the months that he is home.  I agree with that because it is easier on the child than driving six hours there and six hours back on those weekends. 
 
My problem is that he and his attorney want me to pay for 12 tickets a year so that she can have visitation with his wife and mother on the weekends that he is not home.  I do not feel responsible for that, and I could be wrong.  His attorney told me that the courts have determined visitation is for the family and not just for him when he is home.  I agreed that they could see her on those weekends at their expense but that is as far as I wanted to go.  I have not heard anything from him or his attorney since that meeting which was three weeks ago. 
 
Is it likely that a judge would rule in favor of visitation for his wife and mother at my expense?  I hate to fight for something that would ultimately be ruled in his favor.
 
Thank You

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