Messages

Your damn right it's bondage!


Although I would not leave my job because it pays too well to quit, I do not enjoy it.

Does the thought of taking a chance of doing something you love to do albeit at a lower income cross my mind? You bet it does! Could I do that, hell no because I too have child support obligations so I am stuck!

No freedom in that area. Any lowering of income would be viewed as intentional and to the detriment of the children.

The CP is free to do as she wishes though because there is no governmental agency making sure she dutifully pays her share!!!!!!!

22 years old if they attend college, or 21 years old if they attend any type of secondary i.e. trade school.

How do I know? I am still paying child support AND COLLEGE TUITION for my 21 year old daughter, and of course attorney's fees. They battle for every penny until the bitter end.

Of course I get to express no opinions or offer any advice, just send the money and shut up. Wonder where I'll be when they can no longer extract money out of my A-hole. Guess they'll go away, the ex'es that is.

Well if what you are saying is that the two oldest children (that you were the CP of) are now emancipated that is called a 'change of circumstances'. If she is the CP of your youngest child and the older ones are indeed emancipated I really feel it will no longer be a case of zero child support.

No, it is not fair that she didn't support the older two children but 'fair' does not count in the family court system. They will only care about the current circumstance, and that is that she is caring for your daughter and you will have to contribute your money to her for her to use as she sees fit, period.

I know it sucks. I am an NCP and have been raked over the coals for 18 years so far by two different 'moms'. I am only telling you to be realistic. Lawyers will tell you lots of things that may or may not be true. You will fight, thinking you will win, you will spend tons of money on legal fees, and it will all boil down to how the judge feels that day. His job is to look out for the 'best interest of the child' standard. He will err on the side of caution to the CP in most cases. The two oldest children are irrelevant if they are now emancipated and you will get no where using that argument as a strategy.

Not trying to burst your bubble. But you have said nothing so far that leads me to believe you will pay zero.

Good Luck!

I don't know the particulars of your case but it is an EXTREMELY RARE case that awards zero child support, and that is normally ONLY if BOTH parties agree to it. I would worry that your attorney is blowing smoke up your butt. Child support is ALWAYS, ALWAYS modifiable. If biomom now wants it she will probably get it, even if you have so-called 50-50 parenting time.

Sorry, but beware in the family court, the NCP will pay!

detailing medical costs. And most state that if child is taken to an out-of-network provider (when the same treatment is available in-network) then that person is responsible for most if not all of the expense.

As far as telling the provider that you did not sign for, or authorize the treatment etc..... GOOD LUCK!  They do not care. I was harrassed for over a year regarding medical bills that were not my responsibility. I asked for documentation with MY signature on it, none was provided. They said it does not matter. It got pretty nasty at times, accusing me of not being a good father etc. (by the collection agency). It is STILL on my credit report. They stated I was the insurance provider so it was my responsibility. No one cared what the court order stated. I never paid it! I asked them if they ever tried billing biomom since her signature was on the consent form. They said they had not and would not because I needed to pay it. I finally changed my phone number. At least I get some peace and quiet now!  :)

>OUCH!!! How did they end up taking so much over?? Now I'm
>worried but I know that our PBFH will also be taking us back
>to court for more money as soon as she can. So it will
>probably get taken care of that way. So you're telling me that
>"future arrears" gets paid out to biomom immediately???

     They incorrectly calculated an arrearage which I then paid. The 'mistake' was found on a subsequent audit. Since it was already given to biomom they have no 'legal' way to get it back from her. They cannot withold any amount of the current cs payment as that might impact the minor child by her receiving 'less' than what she is used to getting every month. This is state law supposedly. They said I could go to biomom myself and ask for it back. Yeah right!!!!!! So that leaves my only option as waiting for her to request an upward mod and when it gets 'backdated' to the date of the request I can hopefully show that I am overpaid and the 'future arrears' (my overpayment) amount will be used toward back child support. I'll be soooooo glad when the slavery ends.


>because I was of the mind that they held on to that money.
>Don't get me wrong I think child support is great, but I don't
>think every dad should be treated like a dead beat. If they
>take too much they should damn well give it back!!!! x(

I overpaid by $1400.00 due to CSE's own miscalculations. They will not refund my money nor will they take it back from biomom. I forget their terminology exactly but they hold it against "future arrears" or something like that. They cannot withhold one red cent from "current support" by law (from biomom). They said I could ask biomom for it (fat chance), or file an appeal (never bothered). I figure the next time she goes for more money (and she will) that they will backdate the increased amount to the date of filing and that will eat into my overpayment. Imagine her surprise when she is expecting a big fat check for retroactive $$$$$$$$ and she finds out I was overpaid so she gets squat but the increase.  :)

I'll be glad when it is all over. I go to court, FINALLY, in two weeks to see if biomom #1 gets college tuition on top of a CS increase.

We all know that children from a broken home are ENTITLED to have everything handed to them on a silver platter. The kids of 'intact' homes are the ones who usually have to 'earn' their way through life and learn the value of money etc........ God forbid he starts another family because they are entitled to nothing while the kids from his divorce get everything. It sounds pretty much like the typical NCP screw job. Not sure if there is much 'help' for him unfortunately, he is at the mercy of the judge.

It might be possible to pay my daughter directly since she is a RESPONSIBLE adult but............. Mom will probably cry foul because even though my daughter lives at college 11 months out of the year mom STILL has to provide a 'home' for her. Oh yeah, their mortgage is paid off, but that doesn't matter, the room she keeps at the ready still has a monetary value that 'mommy' is entitled to. Funny I don't get the same credit for having a home? I would love to pay my daughter directly and hope to accomplish that. Ideally both 'mom' and myself would BOTH be required by the court to directly pay our adult daughter our respective share of TOTAL support. Then maybe she would be able to 'live in the standard she would have had, had the marriage not been dissolved 19 F'in years ago when I earned squat. It seems my success gets passed on to everyone else but me. Mommy remarried well and good for her, I harbor no ill-will to her good fortune but neither of my exes seem to think I am entitled to enjoy my success. After all "It's FOR THE CHILDREN".  :)

I'm not bitter, really  I'm not.

A lot depends on what state the order is in. Depending on the state statutes CS could continue for reasons of higher education or disability of the child etc. If the statute has language similiar to this it does not "automatically" stop at 18 or HS graduation.

My state is Missouri. I am currently involved in litigation for a 20 year old in one last money-grab from biomom. Our statutes say CS ends at 18 or HS graduation whichever is later UNLESS........blah, blah, blah. The blah, blah, blah's will get you everytime!   :)