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I know this is very unusual.  Attorney said that I am very likely to get custody of my two minor children, but there is a chance that one (16 year old) might be given the option to remain with my ex, while I get the other (10 year old).  I was asked to prepare examples of what I would like the parenting plans to look like for each possibility.

Wondering if there are any examples or scenarios where others here have made something like this work.

We live a full days' travel apart, so this cuts down on the number of feasible exchanges. 

Because of the age difference, they have vastly different activities, social circles etc.  They also don't get along very well.  However, I don't want to create a situation where they NEVER see each other because one is with me and one is with her 100% of the time.

Have not posted in awhile.  I have a motion to modify filed and am anticipating change of custody to be granted.  I got myself an attorney... actually did research, got recommendations and got one of the highest-recommended.  So I haven't been posting here, rather I am letting him handle it. 

One question I am still coming up with, does anyone know a good way to get documentation from the state, like an itemized list of all child support which has been paid?  LBFH has claimed my son on her taxes for the past three years in violation of the court order, but I have to be able to prove that all child support was paid during those years.  We're expecting that she'll be ordered to amend her returns and sign the IRS release form.

Seeking modification of custody.  The GAL wants to meet with me.  Any advice on how to prepare for such a meeting, what to do/what not to do?  Obviously I am rather nervous about it.

[mother]

Update:  my case is still ongoing, I'm going after a change in custody due to my ex-wife being married to a boy (14 years younger than her) who was convicted of beating up our daughter.  At present, LBFH has primary physical custody and I pay child support.

15 year old son started having an attitude because my wife and I just bought laptop computers with a one-time settlement we received.  We also bought a computer for one of my stepkids to use for school (not too expensive.)  He is asking why we didn't buy things for him instead, such as school supplies, more clothes, a laptop, etc.

LBFH is not a very good mother (hence the reason for the motion to modify) and doesn't know how to manage money.  She receives both child support and state aid, neither she or her new husband have a very good work ethic.  Money rarely gets spent on the kids from what I can tell.... another example, one of the daughters is college age but doesn't see any of the money.... in fact, this daughter has been working since she was 16, and the mother frequently borrows money from the daughter. 

On one hand, I pay child support diligently and feel that LBFH should be providing these things.  We did purchase new shoes at the end of summer, as the shoes she sent him in had literally worn through.  Providing all of these things would be like paying child support twice, and other than the said settlement, we're a paycheck to paycheck family and can't afford to take food off of our own table.

On the other hand, I don't want to see my kids suffer just because they have a bad mother and stepfather.

What's a good way to answer such requests from my son?  I know that I'm not supposed to disparage the other parent, which might be inferred from suggesting that she should be buying this stuff for him.  However, I don't feel that I should have to "cover" for her mistakes, making myself out to be the faulty parent in the process.

Regarding the request for a laptop, I've given them computers in the past and they seem to "disappear" (a polite way of suggesting that she drinks them up.)  I'd likely get him a laptop for school if he lived here, but not sure if I should actually say that, as this would be construed as me bribing him to tell a GAL that he wants to live here.

Is anyone familiar with the procedure to register a foreign (from another state) divorce decree in Illinois?

Is perjury (lying on the witness stand) also considered to be contempt? 

Scenario:  pro se litigant has obtained documentation proving that other party lied in their testimony at a hearing.  Case is still open and active.  Is the course of action to file a motion for rule to show cause? Or is there a different motion for perjury?

Update!!!! on my fiance's case,, We have recently found out that a magistrate cannot even terminate parental rights...he is not only appealing but is filing a motion to have the hearing null and void due to the fact that his rights were violated.....under the fourteenth amendment!!!  Keep in mind...judges can be wrong and they can be reprimanded and even de=robed(not sure that is the proper term, but I'm sure you get what I mean)!!!!

I agree, my wife was assigned a magistrate for her case regarding her son, and the guy is a flipping idiot.  He ordered a 3 year old to be delivered to his maternal grandparents....knowing that the same maternal grandparents had an active restraining order against them regarding the same child.

Go to the media.  And, these days, mediums such as craigslist or Facebook are considered the "media".....  You can also set up a webpage with your own domain name for under two dollars.

This sounds a lot like my situation.  Ex tried to poison the kids with lies about me, has tried to replace me as their father in favor of a boy who is just a few years older than our oldest daughter, and who beats on her as well as the kids.  Routinely exposes them to scum with criminal records, namely her "new family" as well as her friends.  She regularly denies me my parenting time, and I often have to take a day off of work, drive seven hours one way only to have some or all of the children hidden from me when I get there.

I have to say, it's difficult to "be patient" as she has now alienated my oldest daughter from me entirely, as well as my oldest son who is from another marriage, and whom she has no need or right to communicate with.  The daughter just seems to believe anything she's told, no matter how ludicrous, and would ignore anything I said, no matter how grounded in fact. 

I don't post here much, as I have saved up my money for two years and have retained the best family law attorney in the area and am seeking to obtain custody from their unfit mother.

Yes, you can file by mail -- don't wait too long, because waiting sends a message too.

Ah the victim mode....all too familiar with that train too.

She uses that old trick which some of the more extreme feminist groups used to preach....when beaten, just make claims of "abuse" and "harassment" so that the real facts will be overshadowed.  She once tried to get a protective order, because I brought the police to one of our parenting time exchanges.  Her explanation was that she should be granted a protective order because I "must have lied to the police to get them to come."

Call the court near her and see if they have the forms online or if they can mail you blank ones. YOu may be able to file by mail or drop off completed paperwork.
If she denied access...you file contempt of court. Bring a stamped copy of all orders you have....make copies to attach to contempt. Sometimes they want to see originals...
Each time, file. Make sure you get police report or buy coffee with receipt at exchange spot to prove you were there.

Yup, when she failed to show up, I went to the police station (it's 50 feet away from the town square where we do the exchanges, due to past harassment and threats by her Springeresque family and friends.)  The officer who helped us was the same one who arrested her piece of sh-- husband when he beat up my daughter, so he already knows the situation.