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So my children have told me that BM is going to get married at the court house this year and then move out her mother's house. They will be moving about 15-35 miles away from where she is currently living. So far I have heard 2 different cities/townships that she will be moving to, she has not said one word to me since sending me the email asking me permission to switch their schools.


I really do not want to see her move my kids out of the school district they are in and moving them into a crappier school district. Antioch has one of the worst records in the state of Illinois, the other town is exactly on par with the school district that I am in. They are currently in one of the best districts in the state of Illinois and both of my children carry straight A's throughout the year.


Can I do anything to stop her? As of now she is going to just drive them to and from school until the school year is over and then register them in the new school district. Can I suggest that my kids come to my school district instead?

Alright so there is a long story behind how we got here but here are the cliffs notes:

1 year ago I broke my foot, had surgery and was off work on disability for nearly 3 months. I got 6 weeks behind on child support. Was taken to court by BM and subsequently found in contempt. Ordered to pay an additional $50 a week in child support ($248 per week total) to pay $1500 in back child support and also an additional $50 per week to pay legal expenses of $3000.

Work messed up and missed one payment of $250, called BM and asked to pay her $80 a week in order to make it up as I couldn't afford to walk away with less than $200 for that week and she said no. 4 weeks later found myself back in court for the $250 payment with BM and her lawyer trying to place me back in contempt.

The judge for our case was not in court that day and we had a replacement judge who said that he could not rule on the comptempt because the previous judge did not order a purge document. Then told BM and her lawyer to basically get out of the court room and told me, the DH, to file a petition to modify child support.

I filed the motion but I am not sure what I need to bring with me for the motion and where I should go with my need to reduce the child support. I know that I am paying too much, especially for the additional monies for the legal fees and the back child support.
Any ideas what I should do?

The only reseveration that I have about going full force for full custody at this point in that the children do have a somewhat stable environment since they are living at their grandparent's house with their mother. She has done a very good job at keeping the kids away from her BS. She knows that I am not messing around with my kids and that the kids should really be with me, but she certainly does not want to lose what she is getting from me on a weekly basis, and she doesn't want to be the mom that gave up her kids, even if it is for the best.

I don't see her moving out of her parents house anytime soon, and I think she knows that if she does I will do what is needed to get the kids from her because I will not allow the kids to be put in danger by her boyfriend and whatever other drama she decides to bring. She can't do that now while living at her parent's house

Hello everyone, I am new to the forum here and I am excited to tap into the wealth of information here.

Iwill try and be brief in explaining my story. My ex wife and Iseparated in January of 2008. We have 2 children under the age of 10.We started the divorce process with her having an attorney and I was onmy own. Baby Mama moved in with her parents and I moved in with myfather. The children stayed with Baby Mama.  We had a verbal agreementon visitation, I would see the kids 2 days a week and every otherweekend. As months passed with no court action I eventually had thekids 6 days a week one week and 3 days a week the other week allovernights.  This was somewhat forced into place by me because BabyMama was more interested in her new boyfriend and did everything in herpower to lie to me about where my kids were and who was watching them.Her new boyfriend is a piece of work with a rap sheet longer thanSanta's naughty or nice list. Somewhere in the neighborhood of 38 total hits, mostly traffic related, but he does have 4 domestics, a fewDWI/DUI's, and last but certainly not least a class D felony for FalseImprisonment and Intent to Harm. He basically kidnapped the mother ofhis child when she was 6 months pregnant, threatened to set her onfire, and dragged her across state lines. Luckily she escaped and livedto tell about it. The boyfriend has 2 kids of his own that he doesn'tsee or support. Oh and I found out that a month after we separated she(baby mama) contracted Herpes from her boyfriend whom didn't disclosehis STD with her before having sex with her. He knew he had an STD andhas passed it on to several other girls before my ex-wife.

Inaugust of 2008 Baby Mama decided she wanted to move to Texas with hernew boyfriend (he ran there when his baby mama threaten to take him tocourt for child support). After about 2 weeks of talking about I agreedto let her go and move there if she left me with the kids. She agreedand had her lawyer draw the papers to reflect her move. About a weekbefore she was going to move her boyfriend moved back into town becausehe caught a warrant in Texas and Florida. She came to me and told methat she was no longer moving and that she had fired her lawyer andretained a new attorney. I hired a lawyer at this time and explainedthe situation and expressed my interest in filing for temporarycustody. He began gathering information (this took several months btw,as status date after status date passed). In April of 2009, her lawyerbeat us to the punch and filed for temporary custody and a childsupport order. I had been paying child support every week since weseparated. I turned around and subsequently fired my lawyer since hedid absolutely nothing during the time that I retained him.

Fastforward to the present, we were in court on Tuesday for yet anotherstatus date. I was presented with a Marriage Settlement Agreement and aJoint Parenting Agreement earlier in the week and Baby Mama and herlawyer were hoping that I would just sign the papers and be done withit. I changed several things that I had issue with in the papers andgave them to her lawyer. I am going to list the issues below:

1. The use of the word Primary in reference to her being the residential parent. - I removed the word primary.
2.I asked that if my ex is going to be the residential custodian that thechildren both have their own bed to sleep in.  -My son has his own roomand my daughter is forced to sleep with her mother in the same bed. Herlawyer objected to that. He stated the court wouldn't decide on that. Ithen told him that the court might decide on that since she has a verycontagious STD and she sleeps in the same bed as my daughter, and mychildren have their own bedrooms at my townhouse.
3. I have askedthat wording be added to reflect that she cannot bring her boyfriend inthe prescence of my children at any time, regardless of their maritalstatus because of him being a felon.
4. Child support ends at their19th birthday. - Her papers put us both on the hook for educationalexpenses and misc expenses until their 24th birthday if they are inschool. They also extend child support until their 24th birthday. Herlawyer tells me that we do have an obligation as parents to pay forcollege should I children decide to go to college and that the wordinghas to be in the papers because the judge will order it anyway.

Those are the major issues that I brought forth and several smaller ones that are not relevant to this discussion.

Thequestion that I have for the forum is, are my objections out of line?Does her having an STD and a felonious boyfriend risk her being able tokeep residential custody of the children. I feel as though they shouldbe with me and staying with me. BM will eventually attempt to move outher parents house (when she sucks them dry of money), and it will bethat time that she attempts to bring her new man around the kids andput them in danger. I have a feeling that he has already put his handson my ex, which she denies of course.

What is everyone's thoughts?

Oh, I live in Illinois BTW.

Hello everyone, I am new to the forum here and I am excited to tap into the wealth of information here.

I will try and be brief in explaining my story. My ex wife and I separated in January of 2008. We have 2 children under the age of 10. We started the divorce process with her having an attorney and I was on my own. Baby Mama moved in with her parents and I moved in with my father. The children stayed with Baby Mama.  We had a verbal agreement on visitation, I would see the kids 2 days a week and every other weekend. As months passed with no court action I eventually had the kids 6 days a week one week and 3 days a week the other week all overnights.  This was somewhat forced into place by me because Baby Mama was more interested in her new boyfriend and did everything in her power to lie to me about where my kids were and who was watching them. Her new boyfriend is a piece of work with a rap sheet longer than Santa's naughty or nice list. Somewhere in the neighborhood of 38  total hits, mostly traffic related, but he does have 4 domestics, a few DWI/DUI's, and last but certainly not least a class D felony for False Imprisonment and Intent to Harm. He basically kidnapped the mother of his child when she was 6 months pregnant, threatened to set her on fire, and dragged her across state lines. Luckily she escaped and lived to tell about it. The boyfriend has 2 kids of his own that he doesn't see or support. Oh and I found out that a month after we separated she (baby mama) contracted Herpes from her boyfriend whom didn't disclose his STD with her before having sex with her. He knew he had an STD and has passed it on to several other girls before my ex-wife.

In august of 2008 Baby Mama decided she wanted to move to Texas with her new boyfriend (he ran there when his baby mama threaten to take him to court for child support). After about 2 weeks of talking about I agreed to let her go and move there if she left me with the kids. She agreed and had her lawyer draw the papers to reflect her move. About a week before she was going to move her boyfriend moved back into town because he caught a warrant in Texas and Florida. She came to me and told me that she was no longer moving and that she had fired her lawyer and retained a new attorney. I hired a lawyer at this time and explained the situation and expressed my interest in filing for temporary custody. He began gathering information (this took several months btw, as status date after status date passed). In April of 2009, her lawyer beat us to the punch and filed for temporary custody and a child support order. I had been paying child support every week since we separated. I turned around and subsequently fired my lawyer since he did absolutely nothing during the time that I retained him.

Fast forward to the present, we were in court on Tuesday for yet another status date. I was presented with a Marriage Settlement Agreement and a Joint Parenting Agreement earlier in the week and Baby Mama and her lawyer were hoping that I would just sign the papers and be done with it. I changed several things that I had issue with in the papers and gave them to her lawyer. I am going to list the issues below:

1. The use of the word Primary in reference to her being the residential parent. - I removed the word primary.
2. I asked that if my ex is going to be the residential custodian that the children both have their own bed to sleep in.  -My son has his own room and my daughter is forced to sleep with her mother in the same bed. Her lawyer objected to that. He stated the court wouldn't decide on that. I then told him that the court might decide on that since she has a very contagious STD and she sleeps in the same bed as my daughter, and my children have their own bedrooms at my townhouse.
3. I have asked that wording be added to reflect that she cannot bring her boyfriend in the prescence of my children at any time, regardless of their marital status because of him being a felon.
4. Child support ends at their 19th birthday. - Her papers put us both on the hook for educational expenses and misc expenses until their 24th birthday if they are in school. They also extend child support until their 24th birthday. Her lawyer tells me that we do have an obligation as parents to pay for college should I children decide to go to college and that the wording has to be in the papers because the judge will order it anyway.

Those are the major issues that I brought forth and several smaller ones that are not relevant to this discussion.

The question that I have for the forum is, are my objections out of line? Does her having an STD and a felonious boyfriend risk her being able to keep residential custody of the children. I feel as though they should be with me and staying with me. BM will eventually attempt to move out her parents house (when she sucks them dry of money), and it will be that time that she attempts to bring her new man around the kids and put them in danger. I have a feeling that he has already put his hands on my ex, which she denies of course.

What is everyone's thoughts?

Oh, I live in Illinois BTW.