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Topics - annemichellesdad

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11
Dear Socrateaser / Legal status and interpretation questions
« on: Mar 14, 2006, 03:58:42 AM »
Hello and thank you in advance. I am a father in GA struggling with an NPD mother. As you are well aware, narcisstic personalities often do not reveal themselves until after the relationship develops problems. In this case, the mother was very happy to have me as a father, and it was very convenient to her for me to be so eager to care for our child after we split up. However, mother wants to be rid of me now, so she's refusing to allow me to see our child.

Although not married, we cohabited for years together, and, at the time of our child's birth, fully established our parental rights (legalizing me as the father) through our child's birthstate's administrative program. The acknowledge signed by both of us, according to state law, has "the effect of a judgment".

We now live in GA. Mother claims that withholding our child is solely at her discretion according to GA law, and that according to GA law our child is no longer legitimate and that I am not a legal father whatsoever. She claims the out-of-state documents (administrative judgment) are now worthless.

The basis for all of this is a GA law that states: "A child born out of wedlock is defined as the child of parents who are not married when the child is born." This definition determines not only the legal relationship between unwed fathers and their children in GA, but there's numerous laws thereafter saying the child can't inherit, mother's have sole custody, etc. So really, it's the basis for everything.

1 - Is an administrative judgment establishing the legal status of a father (yes, I understand that this is NOT the same thing as "custodial" status) really rendered worthless just by crossing state lines? What about full faith and credit?

2 - The signed papers consistent of written and witnessed acknowledgments of paternity, administrated by the Dept of Social Services, and, through statute, given the effect of a judgment.Would it be possible to domesticate a foreign administrative judgment?

3 - Regardless of the validity of the out-of-state papers, the GA law seems only to apply to births occuring in the state of GA, subsequently affecting only parental relationships between parents and their children who are born in the state of GA. The present-tense "ARE not married WHEN the child is born" suggests that the law is only meant to be applied in the present-tense at a very specifc time (when the child is born). Since no state, obviously, can pass a law which affects citizens OUTSIDE ITS JURIDICTION, then this law would not have been applicable at the time of our child's birth. And, due to the present-tense restraint, it does not appear to operate retroactively. (That is, it does not say "parents WERE not married".) In other words, this law seems 1) to be applicable to parents-children born in the state of GA only, 2) does not provide, correctly, for any jurisdictional crossing, either at the time of a child's birth OR after the fact.  

Does this seem like a proper legal interpretation?

4 - There has never been a court order affecting legal rights or custody issues here in GA. If my legal rights as a father are indeed intact, and I have consistently demanded for my child to be returned to me, then would not the absence of a court order or statute to protect the mother's withholding of our child open the possibility of civil liability (on her part) for parental interference?

Thank you for your assistance. I know that some sort of litigation is necessary, as I have taken the situation with this NCP as far as it can go otherwise for the sake of amicability. Those who also must co-parent with a narcisstic parent understand that court doesn't always provide relief from them, either

12
Dear Socrateaser / Registering a foreign *administrative* judgment
« on: Aug 13, 2005, 07:21:51 AM »
My child was born out of wedlock in Virginia. Her mother and I resided together and filed papers at birth establishing me as her fully legal father. Virginia law says that, under such circumstances, we, as parents, would each enjoy "equal legal powers and equal legal rights in regards to guardianship of the child", and that our sworn acknowledgment of paternity, filed with the Va Dept of Human Resources - Vital Records, enjoys the "effect of a judgment".

We now live in Ga, where I need to be able to ask the state to enforce my parental rights. Ga domestic law varies GREATLY from Va law; had my child been born here, the sworn acknowledgment would not be filed with the vital records dept. and I would enjoy no rights to my child until I petition the state for a CHANGE of custody (which would, of course, require I prove a substantial change in circumstances). Thankfully, federal law (1993 Federal Omnibus Budget Reconcilation Act) is very specific in requiring all states to "recognize with full faith and credit judgments of paternity from all other states, whether administrative or judicial, with the full legal weight and effect as given in their original state, as if it were entered in that state". (Obviously, the intent and spirit of the law is to be consistent with the full faith and credit afforded to custody judgments via the Uniforum Child Custody Jurisidiction Act.)

1 - How can I have GA recognize and enforce my parental rights as established through administrative judgment in the state of VA?

2 - It would seem that even an administrative judgment could be registered, but GA has no administrative procedure for this. If the matter goes before a judge, what type of judge? Magistrate? Superior Court? Superior Courts handle domestic disputes, but this is not a dispute over the custody, but rather simply a matter of registration.

3 - If the matter must go before a judge, what can I do to help insure that the judge provides my administrative judgment with the full faith and credit it is due?

4 - If a judge fails to recognize the full legal weight and effect of my adminstrative judgment, would he not be acting OUTSIDE of his jurisdiction? In a domestic dispute, he might choose to change custody, for example. But in the matter of simply registering the document, would not any change in the original legal weight and effect of the document constitute acting outside his juridiction, as the legal weight and effect was determined by another jurisdiction altogether?

5 - Provided the above questions represent a valid course of thought in this matter, which county would have jurisdiction over the registration of this administrative judgment, and how would such a request be worded? Again, since it the specific issue is NOT a domestic dispute, it makes no sense to petition the court and list any other private party (such as the mother) as a "defendant". In fact, it seems that NOTHING is being argued. Again, it is simply a matter of requesting that the state recognize the status already previously given to me. If a dispute DOES arise, then the appropriate parties can certainly request a CHANGE.

6 - Finally, I know that this MIGHT be solved by obtaining a DECLARATORY JUDGMENT from the original state, VA. Frankly, I have consulted a couple of attorneys in VA about this possibility, but they seem a bit clueless (and demeaning) about this since it is difficult to determine WHO exactly the defendant might be... the state (what are they defending and where is the conflict?) or the mother (she does NOT dispute the document). Any thoughts here?

Much thanks on this unusual set of circumstances!!



13
Dear Socrateaser / Retroactive legitimation
« on: Feb 10, 2005, 12:41:22 PM »
This is an odd question...

Legal relationship (vs. mere bio relationship) is established between unmarried father and child through administrative judgment. (That is to say, the state does not require a court hearing, but rather an administrative process in conjunction with BM in which the document is given "the effect of a judgment".)

Family (still unmarried) moves to second state, where "legitimation" requires a court order.

1 - Does the father need to do anything in order to have his parental rights recognized?

2 - If so, and father goes through "legitimation" process, can documents from original state be used as evidence to make the legitimation process "retroactive" from the time they first moved to forum state?

OR

2b - Can father file for a domestication of foreign administrative judgment? (Yep, that's a mouthful.)

3 - With either a petition to legitimate or a petition to domesticate, would the mother be named as a defendent?

Seems like the connundrum is how an acknowledgment of paternity from the original state, which has "the effect of a judgment" should be given full faith and credit in the second state, in which the same document only serves as evidence for biological paternity. Certainly a child who is legitimate in one state wouldn't become "illegitimate" in another state just for crossing over a border, especially when both states recognize legalized unwed father-child relationships, but simply in through different means.

Thanks!



14
Dear Socrateaser / Support Modification and Discovery
« on: Feb 10, 2005, 12:28:13 PM »
First, thank you, Soc, on behalf of everyone else and myself for your continued aid.

State of GA
I'm the father, NCP, and pay $350/mo for one child since May 03

During the summer, Mom asked for a support modification. Georgia law says that each parent can seek a mod once each two years. Mom THOUGHT that I had a great deal of "hidden" money. (It ended up being a banking mistake.) In private chambers, judge tended to believe my evidence. Opposing attorney was told to write the final order, and I requested a copy to be sent to me before going to the judge.

Opposing attorney did NOT send a copy. Signed order dated 20 November 04 stated that while no modification would be made, the issue would remain open "pending further investigation".

1 - Sounds to me like her attorney didn't like losing on the issue. Isn't this just a way to keep a modfication request open-ended indefinately, rather than simply losing and having to wait another two years?

2 - I have recently learned of a significant change in the financial status of mom. Since this is HER request for mod, can I still request basic financial discovery, like tax, banking, credit card, and real estate information?

Thank you




15
Dear Socrateaser / Incarceration for attorney fees
« on: Jan 30, 2005, 11:46:52 AM »
State of Georgia. No court order of custody yet (not even temporary), but I am under a court order to pay child support.

In December of last year, the BM filed a for contempt just one day following the due date of child support. Prior to court, I paid the full amount. (I've never been more than 30 days behind.) However, she still let the issue go before court, asking for attorney fees for the cost of contempt charge.

At the hearing, the judge found that I had been in contempt, but acknowledged that the amount had indeed since been paid. However, he ordered me incarcerated until attorney fees of $1000 "for the current litigation" be paid in full.  I was indeed arrested on the spot and was not released until the full amount was paid. (Thank god for good friends,) All of this is, by the way, articulated very clearly in the judge's printed and signed order.

1 - While I am aware of the imfamous California court case in which it was determined that child support does not qualify as a "debt", aren't attorney fees civil debts?

2 - If attorney fees are civil debts, is it unConstitutional to imprison someone for non-payment of that debt?

3 - Because I was incarcerated, and because the amount had to be paid in full in order to be freed, this isn't exactly a "decision" which can be appealed. And judges are immune from lawsuit when acting in a judicial capacity, even if doing so maliciously. If I was incarcerated un-Constitutionally, what is my remedy for the injustice?

16
General Issues / Are You An Alienated Parent?? Please read!!
« on: Oct 31, 2006, 06:43:33 PM »
Many of us complain about the family courts. Whle it's true that they leave MUCH to be desired, the people who put our families in the courts in the first place are our legislatures.... well-intentioned but uncreative laws dealing with complex issues. The way to make change is NOT in the courts, but with our laws. Sounds impossible? Absolutely not! That is what our legislatures are for!

I am in a position of being able to influence potential legislation aimed at preventing/punishing acts of parental alienation. PLEASE share your story with me via email. The more true life examples I have, the more influential I can be.

I no longer have the email account used to get set up in this forum. So, Please send a BRIEF outline of your situation as an alienated parent to:

michaelingeorgia@yahoo.com

Again, keep it brief (three short paragraphs) for now. I will respond if more information is needed. Please include what STATE you live in.

This is a chance for EVERYONE who is a victim of parental alienation to truly help out and do something. Please do not let this opportunity pass you by. You never know when YOUR story is the one which will push this effort over the edge.

17
General Issues / Rare type of lawsuit filed
« on: Oct 15, 2006, 06:53:23 AM »
On September 22, 2006, after eighteen months of legal research (and personal hell), a lawsuit was finally filed against the mother of my child. However, it was not your typical custody lawsuit. The whole thing may end up failing miserably, but something had to be done.

My daughter was born in Virginia in 1997. Although her mother and I were not married, we legitimated our child at the time of her birth using that state's administrative processes. And because we also cohabitated, we were both recognized by state law as "equal legal parents with equal legal powers in regards to [our child]".

When our daughter was one year old, we moved to Georgia, which has no administrative processes for legitimation; a court order is mandatory. Thus, when the mother of my child decided to leave the family (taking my child with her), it was difficult, if not impossible, getting my rights enforced in the state of Georgia. For at least two years, however, she was more or less tolerant of my relationship with my child, and our daughter actually spent MORE THAN HALF of that in my own direct care.

Finally, however, as the mother became increasingly controlling (and the child became increasing verbal about wanting to live with me all of the time) I went to court to get my rights recognized. Even found a federal law (OBRA 1993) that required all states to recognize actions establishing legal paternity from all other states, whether by administrative or judicial processes. The judge, a "good 'ol boy", defiantly said "I don't follow Virginia law. And I don't follow federal law."  He ordered child support but dismissed my case.

After that, the mother refused to let me see my daughter AT ALL. Letter after letter was sent to her attorney requesting that I be allowed to at least see my child, all the time maintaining that I had rights (the judge didn't take them away, he simply didn't recognize them in the dismissal). NEVER a response.

After two years of this, I had enough. The mother had moved to a different county (different judge, no pending case), so I filed a lawsuit for PARENTAL INTERFERENCE AND INTENTIONAL INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS. In it, I allege that the mother intentional interfereed in my parental rights, that she did so without the protection of a court order (she has NOTHING saying that she has sole custody, and I have nothing restricting or terminating my rights), and that she did so with malice and intent to cause me emotional  distress (extensive facts and evidence support this claim). All of the elements of a legitimate tort are here. There is also included a motion for DECLARATORY JUDGMENT for an enforcable recognition of my parental rights as established in Virginia and, as yet, legally unmodified.

It is uncommon for situations like this to exist because courts commonly intervene and issue custody orders or other others affecting parental rights. Not so here. The mother didn't bother obtaining the "protection" of a court order, and my own attempts to obtain an order protecting my rights was malicously thwarted through the only legal remedy I had available.

A response is due soon, but I have already been, for the past six months, preparing evidence and witnesses. I'm not certain what chances a case like this has, but again, something has to be done; I receive email and phone messages from my daughter crying that she wants me in her life. A tort lawsuit, even if successful, certainly won't solve all of the issues involved, but it may just put this case back on track towards real negotiation or settlement as opposed to simply a unilateral decision by one parent to totally alienate their child from the other.

Please wish me luck!

18
General Issues / Attorney fees and jail??
« on: Jan 29, 2005, 04:36:31 PM »
I was orde red to pay attorney fees to my ex. When I did not, I was found in contempt of court and ordered to be incarcerated until they were paid in full.

I thought that it was un Constitutional to be imprisoned for a debt. Was something wrong done here? And, if so, having been imprisoned until the debt was paid, is there any recourse?

Thanks!


19
Custody Issues / File for custody??
« on: Mar 02, 2007, 06:02:53 AM »
The technical details are a little unusual:

We were not married, but we each established through admistrative procedures (with the effect of a judgment) as, according to law, "equal legal parents with equal legal rights and responsibilities" in regards to our child. The mother and I do not have a formal legal custody agreement between us of our 9 year old daughter. She was three when we separated (mom left), and for three years, we amicably shared parenting time and duties. In fact, our child was in MY care quite a bit more than the mother's (well-documented), and I cared for her DIRECTLY, taking a job working out of my home, whereas the mother had her cared for by others. The mother, with ever more apparent narcissistic tendencies, grew increasingly jealous of her daughter's relationship with me, and angry over the idea of having to share "her" daughter. Despite my encouragement of her mother, our child had virtually no bond with her and was very verbal about wanting to live with me full time.

Three years ago, when mother's boyfriend broke up with her and refused to marry her, I was forced to take the fall. She took our child and moved away, refusing to tell me where she was or letting me see or talk to my girl. The entire time, though heartbroken, I never did anything foolish or threatening. It didn't stop her from getting a temporary restraining order when I found out where she was (about a hundred miles away). She filed two charges against me over a two month period, both of which were promptly dismissed. (One judge scolded her over making such a charge.) While they were pending, however, she was, on the basis of her accusations only, able to have the temp order made permanent.

I have written her attorney diligently every other week, requesting parenting time with my child. She has allowed maybe, on average, on day's visit every four or five months. Maybe a phone call every other month. After the first year, my daughter would call me in secret, sometimes crying for me to come and get her. These days, her spirits are good, but it she seems to blocked out all her emotions in regards to relationships.

The mother actually allowed us two weeks last summer (I think she needed the babysitter), and on that basis I thought things might get better. They have not.It's not been 8 months since I have seen my daughter. This woman is VERY unstable, and I have feared retaliations. My MANY pleas for an amicable resolution have gone unanswered.

Physically, my child is great. She had a VERY STRONG foundation, and it is that foundation which is serving her well now. Does great in school. But her mother is TRULY unbalanced, and has completely alienated our child from not only me but also from anyone with whom she has a conflict, both physically, emotionally, and pyschologically. I just fear that a court is going to look at her school record, she that her grades are good, and make me pay a ton of attorney fees to the mother and dismiss the case. Truly, however, it is the clear intent of this woman to, in every way, render this child COMPLETELY FATHERLESS.

Asking for joint custody will be a waste of time, as the mother's objection will be so strong the court will know it will not work (despite having been the norm for more than three years). Anyway, we live too far apart. "Minimal visitation" will only drive this woman to overtly, instead of merely passively, take steps to drive a wedge between my daughter and I. Thus far, the alienation has been slow and steady, facilitated by physical separation. If our daughter were to begin seeing me every other weekend, the mother's tactics would change and our daughter would be caught in the crossfire.

The only thing I know to do is to ask for sole custody and for the mother (and me, of course) to undergo psychiatric evaluation. Am I wasting my time with the courts, though, only to end up putting both my daughter and I in different dangers. Trust me... this woman is unpredictable and DANGEROUS in more ways than one!

20
Father's Issues / Are You An Alienated Father?? Please read!!
« on: Oct 31, 2006, 06:42:45 PM »
Many of us complain about the family courts. Whle it's true that they leave MUCH to be desired, the people who put our families in the courts in the first place are our legislatures.... well-intentioned but uncreative laws dealing with complex issues. The way to make change is NOT in the courts, but with our laws. Sounds impossible? Absolutely not! That is what our legislatures are for!

I am in a position of being able to influence potential legislation aimed at preventing/punishing acts of parental alienation. PLEASE share your story with me via email. The more true life examples I have, the more influential I can be.

I no longer have the email account used to get set up in this forum. So, Please send a BRIEF outline of your situation as an alienated parent to:

michaelingeorgia@yahoo.com

Again, keep it brief (three short paragraphs) for now. I will respond if more information is needed. Please include what STATE you live in.

This is a chance for EVERYONE who is a victim of parental alienation to truly help out and do something. Please do not let this opportunity pass you by. You never know when YOUR story is the one which will push this effort over the edge.

Pages: 1 23
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