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Messages - awakenlynn

Pages: 1 23 4 ... 22
Visitation Issues / Re: In need of some quick advice!!!
« on: Aug 13, 2009, 05:11:44 PM »
If you can't have anyone come with you, I would try and set up a video recorder to record your pick ups and drop offs (make sure the date shows up on playback) and a voice recorder (check your state laws) to record the actual meetings. 
If she is claiming the child is injured during each visit, see if you can take pictures at the end of each visit to show the child is fine, if the child does get injured make sure you document it.
Keep a journal just for your visits and document everything that way when you take it into court your can say, "jane" fell off her bike and such/such date and scraped her knee and you would have a picture to show.
Keep all other communications written so you have proof of what is discussed.
Good luck

Illinois State Forum / Re: Divorcing father needs help!
« on: Jun 10, 2009, 07:50:49 PM »
IL has a low-income attorney help through Prairie State (I think that is what it is called).  It definately sounds like you will need an attorney from what you said about your situation and your ex.
Good luck.

While the support will be by formula, does the NCP have any other children?  You will need to check to see what variables the court will look at.  While daycare can be on top, it isn't always, alot will depend on the judge and the information he gets from both parties.

Has her attorney requested a continuance?

Visitation Issues / Re: International visitation (non-military)
« on: Jun 10, 2009, 07:17:43 PM »
While our case isn't international, we also had trouble with ex and SD flying.  What we did to "help" ex is that we picked an airline and stuck with it even if other airlines had cheaper flights .  We researched who the airline used as a caretaker/chaperone for the UAM's.  We printed off maps of the airports and kept the airports the same for each flight.  The adult gets to walk the child back to the gate and when boarding comes, the child will either board very first or very last with any other UAM's and their chaperones.  The other parent will be waiting at the other gate waiting for pick-up.  Since the child is younger, keep the flights to non-stop, not the early (take into account drive time plus the 90-120min the airlines want you there early) and not the last flight of the day.
With our ex and we had to go to court, we had everything printed off in its own file and just handed it all to the judge--maps, chaperone company information, airline information on the UAM's, notes about flying non-stop, the general information about the airline we picked and the airports we would use.  The judge told the ex to grow up and if we could do this research then so could have ex and with hubby's permission just handed the file over to ex.  With SD being in TX though, they try to order non-stop flights until age 16, while other states allow children to fly with lay-overs according to the airline rules or if they don't have flight experience they fly non-stop for alittle while.
Double check airline rules since the flights will be international.  Do all the research you can so you have everything together for the judge and that will help alittle.  Make sure you think of contingency plans in case a flight is delayed or re-routed (for like bad weather).  Also, make a note of who will pay for what if there had to be a flight change. 

I would say that because she has moved out of state and you did not follow her, you need to speak with an attorney in her state since that is where the kids are.  Each state is different when it comes to visitation and child support.  BUT in general visitation and child support are not linked.  Unless there were orders, she really can't deny you time with the kids if the issue of child support has not been addressed.  I would definately start putting money aside for the child support or be making payments even without an agreement but have it CLEARLY marked the dates and that it is for child support so she can't later tell a judge that it was a gift.
I don't know Georgia's laws in regards to father's rights, but since you are both in different states, many judges won't make it easy for you.

Visitation Issues / Re: Excuses by GAL for joint placement (50/50)
« on: Jun 02, 2009, 04:22:03 PM »
Another way may be to have the order drawn up so its 50/50 even though it doesn't SAY 50/50?  Spell out how each parent would get the time with the child weekly, how each holiday would go and that you have right of first refusal (?) anytime she needed a babysitter and so for.

Father's Issues / Re: Remodification..... attorney or go it alone?
« on: May 26, 2009, 05:54:12 PM »
Definately do your research first!  Also how much trouble with ex give you if you go it alone?  In general I would suggest an attorney who would know all the in's and out's of child support.  We did it pro se one year in IL and it stayed the same (ex wanted an increase) and this year when ex wanted it reviewed, she likes to keep claiming we are not paying support but it is generally problems with the CSO instead.  In IL we had the child support abated for the 8 weeks we had the SD in the summer.  TX has run into a MAJOR problem trying to add this into their system and it really screwed up the numbers, by THOUSANDS of dollars.  So hubby sat down with the Attorney General who takes care of the child support in our case and child support was actually decreased for us along with changes to take into account the abatement they had to work with.  We do have arrears to take care of but TX is still doing an audit (since March), they keep losing paperwork.  Hubby has been laid off since January and the guy was pretty understanding about it and just said to keep them up to date.  Hubby got a temp job starting next week, being a restaurant server (an $11 difference in pay) so we need to talk to unemployment and the CSO and see how things can be taken care of.  Hopefully the construction industry will kick back in soon!
Make sure you look at all your finances no matter how small.  An attorney, even if you just see one as a consultation can tell you basic things the courts will and will not take into account.  If ex likes to play games and you know who she works for an attorney could possibly subpoena her employment and tax information.

Father's Issues / Re: help !!!!
« on: May 26, 2009, 05:36:16 PM »
I am sorry to hear what your daughter is going through.  Continue to make reports, continue to document it and maybe talk to her teacher and counselor and let them keep a better eye out for anything they might have shrugged off that might have been "disciplining".  My step-daughter is not welcome to talk about her dad or family here either and things get pretty dicy for her but for her its more of an emotional abuse than being spanked.  I hope things get better for you and your daughter.

Visitation Issues / After Court Situation
« on: Mar 14, 2009, 04:08:59 PM »
SD had a soccer game yesterday that got cancelled today.  Apparently in court SD texted her mother to let her know the game time.  Ex then told my DH that the game was at 9am and they would be home about 1-3pm.  Found out when SD just called ex lied in court and the game was actually at 2pm and now they won't be home until about 8pm.  DH has been to the school 2 times now when pick up was supposed to be.
DH is furious.  Ex lied to him in the court about the times and SD lied about the times too knowing full well the game times.  On one hand I understand SD's position, she has to live with her mother and deal with her 24/7, but on the other hand she had plenty of time to call or text dad while on the bus and away from mother to let him know the corrected times.  But overall, it has ex written all over it.  DH tried to bend over backward for ex and SD on this visit...he was going to pick SD up today so she could go to her game yesterday, that got cancelled so she was going to go to her girlfriend's birthday party so he was going to pick her up at the hotel this morning instead of the meeting point, then he is lied to about when SD is getting home from her soccer game and instead of getting SD at 11, then at about 1pm, it won't be until 8pm and he has lost a whole day.  If he had known about the changes he would have been able to follow the bus and at least gotten to interact here and there and had dinner with her and the team.
DH is contacting the attorney again on monday.
Just needed to vent.  Thanks

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