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How is the family court in NH? More specifically, Rockingham county????

Do you think its fair, biased, a joke or really efficient?

Fiance and I are considering moving, since BM moved, and we are hoping NH courts might be a little more "friendly" than MA courts.

Let us hear your opinions.


Thanks,
M

Does anyone know anything about going Pro Se in MA?

Can someone please recommend a decent lawyer in Western MA?

Thanks.

[obvious]

I'm not sure where to put this so I figure I'll start with my own state. I'm sure I should post this to Soc but I'd rather see if I could find the answer myself before harrassing him =)

STORY - The BM asked that visitation for my fiance be suspended until he proved he wasn't abusing drugs / or abusing his prescription. The BM made a tape of him taking his medication but she has no evidence that he is a danger while on medication. The tape wasn't admissible in court, however, its existence spawned supervised visits and an evaluation. Our old lawyer failed to question the tape and failed to defend us and ultimately destroyed our case. We now have a new lawyer.

We have already started the evalution but our evaluator is over-booked and he/we cannot finish the evalution in time for trial. We have NO time or the finances to start another evaluation with a new evaluator. Also, my fiance has stopped taking his medication, despite the chronic pain, and could pass a screening. What more could an evaluation show if my fiance is "clean", so to speak?

My question is, can our new lawyer raise an objection to the evidence and the evaluation if we can show its irrelevence, since my fiance is no longer taking his prescription?

Or is our new laywer restricted to working with our case as it is now?

Thanks

PS: It may seem obvious to ask our lawyer but I'm asking here first in an attempt to save what money we have left.

Watch out, MA is doing a Child Support Guidelines update. I don't know if it will be in our favor or if we are just going to get a few more "dead-beats" from it.

If your ex asked you to account for how the Child Support they sent was used what would you think/say/do?

Would you be for it or against it?

I'm asking because my fiance and I would like the BM to account for how the child support is spent. We don't think BM is embezzalling the money for herself or anything, we just think it would help if all parties had a better understanding of how much the total cost of caring for the daughter is.

Also, we arent trying to make things difficult for BM. Instead of always having to ask BM, fiance would like to already know if his daughter is growing out of her clothes or if she needs more school supplies, ect. We think having a logbook of how money is spent for their daughter would help to gauge what she needs now and help us better prepare for her needs in the future as well.

Suggestion, comments, criticisms or advice is greatly appreciated.

What do you do when the ex wants you to support them, along with the children, and they ask for the money in the form of child supprt?

My fiance's ex has motioned for a raise in child support, claiming she can't afford to raise their daughter unless my fiance pays more.  However, the ex has a good job that pays well and she brings home a bigger paycheck than my fiance. She can't afford things because she's paying mortgage on the house they used to share but has neglected to rent out the lower appartment. In other words, she'd rather make my fiance pay more in child support than get off her lazy butt and rent out the lower half of her house, which would bring in an extra $600-$800 a month.

It's a perfectly good appartment and is in decent shape, there is no reason for it to be vacant. She's even had offers but she never returned the calls.

How can we prove in court that the ex is willfully not renting out the appartment?

Will the courts see that she is just playing games?

Dear Soc,

I live in Ma, ex lives in NH

Last week I had a hearing for contempt of child support. During the hearing I offered to pay the arrears from my retirement account but my ex's lawyer objected. The judge requested I fill out an updated financial statement and then sent us to probate for mediation (I believe that's what he meant.)

I filled out the new statement and when I searched for my ex's lawyer, a clerk informed me that the lawyer told the judge I had left the court house and a Capias was issued against me. Note: I never left the court house.

I tele-conferenced the lawyer, faxed him my account balance and told him I'd have to withdrawal to pay the arrears. He then told me he wanted me to pay the court fees and his legal fees as well. He's scheduling another contempt hearing in 2 weeks.

Note: Withdrawing from the account myself would result in fees and penalties. A court order, however, sidesteps all that.

I would rather not pay my ex's legal fees again. Also, my ex and her lawyer have me by the onions and I'm tired of it.

Questions:

1. Aside from going back to court on another contempt hearing in 2 weeks, is there something I can file now to get an order to withdraw for just the amount for the arrears I owe?

Thank you

Dear Soc,

I live in MA, ex and my child now live in NH

The new judgment that was just ordered gives my ex sole legal and physical custody of our 6 yr old child. I must complete a substance abuse evaluation and I have to set-up supervised visitation.

Before trial, ex stated she wanted to move to her home state, 2 hrs away, with her new BF. I did not agree to her move. She filed a motion to have the topic addressed at trial, but the judge denied the motion.

We have not gone back to court for relocation as of yet, however my ex has just moved.

I cannot get a hold of her, since she has given me no forwarding address or phone number. However, on the Internet, I found her name is now currently listed at the same address as her boyfriends. Also, I have witnesses who recently saw a moving trailer at her home.


Questions:

1. What do I do to have my child returned to this state?

2. I have been desperately trying to prove lack of cooperation and PAS on my ex's part; will my ex's move without permission help my argument at all?

3. Any other suggestions on how to handle this?


Thank you

[business]

Dear Soc,

All parties live in MA

I received judgment from trial and I'd like to appeal. However, I read the time to file an appeal is only 30 days from the date of the order. I was told it was 30 business days but I just found out the court goes by calendar days, which means my time to appeal is up. Today was the last day and I cannot make it to the courthouse.

I highly doubt this helps but I received the judgment in the mail almost two a weeks after it was signed.

Questions:

1. Should I try to file tomorrow?

2. Is there anything at all that I can do to get my appeal in?


Thanks.

Good Morning Soc,

All parties live in MA. There was a trial 2 months ago and our case (for custody, visitation and child support) is still in recess/under advisement.


I am pro se.

I have just been served with summons to court for contempt on child support.

The summons says I have 7 days in which to respond.

I'm not sure about what I'm being asked to respond for.

Questions:

1. Do I respond only if I have an argument against being in contempt?



Thank you.

Dear Soc,

My ex and I live in MA, my ex's brother-in-law live in NH.

In a previous post, I told you my ex would not relinquish my mother's ring to either my father or me. I'm considering taking her to court. My other concern is about more property I had stolen, but not by my ex directly.

Just after I moved out, my ex's brother-in-law came to our house and stole ALL of my tools. My tools (my livelihood) were kept in a locked garage.

The police report listed the damages at $3,000. Also in the police report, my ex admitted to the officer that she let her brother-in-law just take my tools. I am not sure which one to take to court about this.



Questions:

1.   When I bring my ex to court for my mother's ring, could I include my tools (damages)?

2.   If I have to bring this case to court separately from the ring, do I bring both my ex and her brother-in-law?



Thank you

Good Afternoon Soc,

All parties reside in MA.

When my ex and I separated, I was the one to move out. Per the court order, my ex and I were supposed to arrange a date for me to pick-up my belongings, but it never happened as she refused to let me back in the house.

The most important thing I'd like to recover is my mother's ring, especially since she's passed away. I did not give the ring to my ex. We were never married or engaged.

Recently my father asked my ex for the ring and she flat out refused, claiming she was giving it to our daughter. I do believe she admitted in email to my father that the ring was not given to her as a gift, but I cannot be sure. I will try to find out.


Both my father and I would very much like to have this ring back.

Questions:
1. What can I do to get my mother's ring back in my possession?

2. Since my father is the original owner, should he try to pursue this instead?



Thank you.

Dear Soc,

All parties live in MA. We share legal custody, mother has physical.

I recieved an email from from my ex demanding my fiance remove pictures of my daughter from her internet profile, stating it is child endangerment. She plans on taking my fiance to court over this.

I gave permission to my fiance to post those pictures and there is nothing wrong with them.

No address, name or age of my daughter is posted on my fiances profile.

Mother has pictures of our duaghter on her internet profile as well and mother's profile lists everthing, including address.

Question:

1. My only question is, if this goes to court, can my fiance be punished and charged with child endangerment?

Thank you.

Good Morning Soc,

Briefing: All parties live in MA. Parents share legal custody and Mother has temp. physical custody of 6yr old daughter. One year ago, Supervised Visits and Evaluation ordered for Father because of drug abuse allegations by Mother. Father is now Pro Se.

One month ago was the trial for custody, visitation and child support but nothing was decided. Case is STILL under advisement.

Mother wants to move 2hrs away and tried to amend her original motion to have the move decided upon at this past trial, but the judge did not allow it. That is to be decided upon separately.

Last night, daughter informed me that she will be moving to Mother's BF's house (in new state) where she will start school one week after tomorrow. Mother never mentioned anything about it, however she swiftly told daughter to hang up the phone after she leaked the info about starting school.

As of yet, there has not been a hearing on relocation, nor have there been any motions filed (by either party) pertaining to it.

As far as the benefits of moving, there are none.

Mother said in testimony that if she moves she would work with her family and would be making more money. This is not a guarantee.

The man she wants to move in with is just a boyfriend, not a spouse, and they've only been together 8 months. Since the BF lives 2hrs away, they have probably only seen eachother a total of 30 times (that is if they see eachother EVERY weekend.) It's a weekend relationship.

Questions:

1. As the case is still under advisement, is it possible for me to file something to prevent the move?

2. If I can file at this time, which would be better to file for – a temp. restraining order or an emergency hearing?

3. Since the mother hasn't actually informed me that she plans to move in 2 weeks, should I not file anything and let her default on the court order? (Perhaps this will help prove her willful disregard for the judge, the court order and state law?)


Thank you.

Dear Soc,

I am completely lost on this.

I live in and this case is being heard in MA.

I have a trial date on June 8th at which my case for custody, visitation, and CS will be heard.

This trial date has been set for three months. My lawyer, however, is filing for an extension on May 26th because he has an appointment to get Lasik Eye surgery done the day of trial.

According to my lawyer, if we were to get the extension it could take 3 months or more for me to get a new trial date.

Currently I have supervised visits and, as I told my lawyer, if I don't go to trial on the 8th I will not be able to continue to afford those visits and keep up with my CS obligation.


1. Do I have the right to tell my lawyer not to file an extension?

2. Am I obligated to pay for the work my laywer puts in to file an extension for my case??

3. If the extension is granted, do I have the right to ask for a speedy trial date?

Thank you for your time

I have a court order to pay child support arrears out of my retirement account.

I got the court order on the 6th of March and sent the withdrawal request form, to the company I have my account with, on the next day, March 7th.

I have copies of the withdrawal request form and a copy of the post office receipt from when I sent it. I scanned and emailed these copies to my ex and my lawyer, who fowarded them to my ex's lawyer.

My ex still has not recieved the money and her lawyer filed comtempt against me. The company has a disclaimer on their form that says "request must be proccessed within 60 days"

There is nothing more I can do.

1. Can I be found in contempt even though I followed the court order?

2. Can I be held resposible for the slow response from the company that has my account??

Thanks

Dear Socrateaser,

I'm between lawyers right now. I have a 4-way meeting with my ex and her lawyer Feb 28th and a pre-trial date March 6th. I'm concerned that this doesn't give me much time to aquire a lawyer, get him/her up to date with my case or give them much time to work on it.

Question:

1. Can I ask for the 4-way to be postponed myself?

2. Can I personally ask for the pre-trial date to be postponed or is an attorney required?

Thank you for your time

Dear Socrateaser,

I need some more legal advice before I lose it.

In my first post I explained my ex has taken me to court on allegations of drug abuse, has made motions for more child support and, just recently, contempt of child support.

My ex wants me to pay for outstanding medical bills but has never sent me paperwork. I am concerned poor living conditions are resulting in frequent doctor visits.

I am going through a drug evaluation and am supposed to have supervised visits with my daughter. However, I have an elusive evaluator and, consequently, have had few appointments and no supervised visits with him.  

In a letter to my laywer, the evaluator claims I am to pay for my ex's appointments along with my own. This was never put in writing and I never signed for that at trial.

My lawyer is extremely neglegent, difficult to communicate with, made a complete mess out of my case and is a (enter own explicit here.) I'm in the process of dumping him and hiring a new one.

I just recieved in the mail, from my lawyer, a compiled list of documents (or interrogatories) that I am to give to my ex. Some of the questions that confused me were related to mental health, what medications I am on and who I live with. The financial questions I have already answered with all the numerous statements I've had to fill out.

We don't have a trial date as of yet, just another pre-trial.

Like most "dead-beat" fathers, I can't afford this battle anymore - financialy and emotionally. My ex just won't stop burying me. Unless I can find a reprieve, I'm going to go broke and never see my daughter again.


My questions are as follows:

1. If it was never put in writing, am I responsible for the charges of my ex's appointments with the substance abuse evaluator?

2. I have read all the 'Hiring Attorneys" and "Attorney Interview Questions" articles on this site but can you, being an attorney, give any tips, suggestions or advice on how to and what to look for when interviewing/hiring an effective one?

3. I am assuming the interrogatories are for trial, for the motion for more C.S, but is there anything else my ex could want this information for?

4. (Pertains to #3)  Can I have my ex fill out one of these, too?

5. With my ex, is there a legal way to draw the line to keep her from making any further attacks?

Thank you in advance for your time.

Dear Socrateaser,

Please forgive me, I am frazzled but I will do my best to make this post comprehensible.

My ex, my daughter (5 yrs.) and I all live in Mass in the Hampden County. My ex is the custodial parent.

I am having trouble dealing with my ex, in and out of court. Bottom line is my ex is going to great lengths to keep our daughter away from my S.O. (Note: Before I met my S.O. it had been a year and a half since my ex and I had been to court. Since my S.O. and I moved in together 6 months ago, my ex has taken me back to court countless times. I have evidence of my ex's animosity on tape.)


Periodically, in a matter of 4 months, my ex managed to bring a number of motions in front of the court. The motions, in order from first to most recent, are:
1. motion to keep my S.O. out of visitation
2. motion to stop my visitation due to drug abuse
3. motion for more child support and for me to be responsible for the total amount of delinquent medical bills
4. contempt for non-payment of child support.

The judge decided on a temporary order in September, for 1 month, that I was to be the only one present during visitation. (Come to find out, the order was never filed) My ex was displeased that this oder was only temporary and, on the day before the experation of the order, she told her lawyer I was abusing drugs. She managed to tape me, at some point, in a bathroom taking my medication. She used that as evidence.

Truth is I take prescription pain medication for an injury I sustained 3 yrs ago in a motorcycle accident. What bothers me is my need for medication never bothered my ex until I met my S.O.. I  have since stopped taking my medication, despite the chronic, insufferable pain and could pass a drug test.

I have been (unwillingly) deliquent in child support payments. I am self-employed and I own a good masonry/home repair business. However, the time I missed from work for court apprearances, lawyer appointments, substance screenings and substance abuse evaluations has caused my business to suffer. Consequently, my attempts to get my daughter back and play by the rules have resulted in putting me further in a hole.

My lawyer doesn't seem to be a help. I asked him to file for a temporary suspension/reduction in child support. He didn't and told me it wasn't the right time. He waited until a month after my ex called me on contempt to file for it.

I had a hearing Jan. 17 about the contempt to which he showed up for an hour and 1/2 late and didn't have his paperwork prepared. I didnt get to speak with him before or after the hearing and he didn't contest anything my ex's lawyer threw at me. I now have to pay 4weeks past child support in 2 days and, on top of my legal fees, I have to pay her legal fees and court fees as well.

In a nutshell I just want to see my daughter. I'm not a bad guy, I'm not abusing drugs and I'm a great father.


My questions are as follows:
1. I can't afford to pay 4 weeks child support in 2 days and my ex's legal fees. Can I appeal the order?

2. Should I pay what I can (which is nowhere near what Ive been ordered) towards the order or should I wait until after I appeal?

3. It's obvious to me that I need a new lawyer but would switching lawyers be detrimental to my case at this time?

4. Should I try to prove my ex's motivation for all of her actions are out of insecurity and because of my S.O.?

5. Im tired of playing catch up. If I found evidence against my ex, is it possible the judge would just think I was mudslinging?

Thank you in advance for your time.

On the news the other night, our judge for our case admitted he (and other judges) is over-worked, overwhelmed and is likely to make mistakes. Could that be of any benefit to our appeal?

Our case stayed in deliberation for over 2 months and our judgment was just awful – BM got sole custody, fiancé has no visitation until he completes an evaluation that he can't afford and he has to pay his child support to a county neither party has ever lived in, even though fiancé and his ex agreed in court that he could just pay BM directly.

Opinions?

Here's a quick one:

When the court says you have so many days to do something (like file a damn appeal) do they count business days or calendar days?

Note: We all live in MA.

Thanks

Finally, after 2 months, we got the answer from court.

We lost. BM got everything - sole legal and physical and finace cant see his daughter unless he finishes a drug evaluation, which we can never afford and is completely unnecessary. I doubt we'll ever see his daughter again, especially after BM moves 3hrs away to live with her BF. This is all wrong, so very wrong.....

I feel dead.

Thanks to everyone who offered their advice and support. Good luck to everyone....

My fiance and his ex were together 9 yrs. They were never married or engaged. When he moved out, he got a court order to get all of his things but that never happend, the ex still has EVERYTHING, including fiance's mother's ring, which her never gave to her.

Recently, fiance's father asked for the ring back and the ex refused, stating it was for her daughter, although she has no right to decide that!

Anyway, how can fiance get this ring back?? (hopefull before she pawns it)

Maybe I should ask Soc??

Thanks!

For the past year my fiance and his ex have been in and out of court. The ex told the courts fiance was on drugs (he wasn't) and she said she was afraid he would hurt their daughter. The courts ordered an evaluation and supervised visits, which we couldnt afford, so the case got dragged out for months.

Since then BM found herself a serious boyfriend, who lives very close to where she grew up and to where her immediate family still lives. The thing is, her boyfriend just bought a house. And BM posted a blog on her "MYSPACE" about how her BF wants her to move in but it was set to "private" and I couldn't read what she wrote.

Oddly, BM has been extremely nice lately and has even gone so far as to suggest that she and fiance sit down and work this case out themselves -meaning both agee to drop the evaluation. Normally, she justs yells at fiance and threatens that she'll see him in court.

We think BM justs wants this case over so she can high-tail it back to her hometown. So, once fiance agrees to skip the evaluation, which he desperatly wants to, the case will be over and BM will be free to leave.

We've previosuly mentioned this to our lawyer but I don't think he understands how major this is. He is waiting for more concrete evidecne - like a recording of her saying she's moving. Howvere, we don't think she's planning on telling us that she's moving until after she gets there.


What the heck do we do? Is there anything we can do?

//www.myspace.com

I heard of this site through a friend and checked it out. I was suprised as hell to find fiance's ex/BM posted on there. She put some real, um, surprising things on there. I'm going to keep a close eye on her posts, I'm sure they will be interesting =)

Check it out, maybe you'll find your ex on there, too.

I'm not sure where to put this. I'm sure I should post this to Soc but I'd rather see if I could find the answer myself before harrassing him =)

STORY - The BM asked that visitation for my fiance be suspended until he proved he wasn't abusing drugs / or abusing his prescription. The BM made a tape of him taking his medication but she has no evidence that he is a danger while on medication. The tape wasn't admissible in court, however, its existence spawned supervised visits and an evaluation. Our old lawyer failed to question the tape and failed to defend us and ultimately destroyed our case. We now have a new lawyer.

We have already started the evalution but our evaluator is over-booked and he/we cannot finish the evalution in time for trial. We have NO time or the finances to start another evaluation with a new evaluator. Also, my fiance has stopped taking his medication, despite the chronic pain, and could pass a screening. What more could an evaluation show if my fiance is "clean", so to speak?

My question is, can our new lawyer raise an objection to the evidence and the evaluation if we can show its irrelevence, since my fiance is no longer taking his prescription?

Or is our new laywer restricted to working with our case as it is now?

Thanks

PS: It may seem obvious to ask our lawyer but I'm asking here first in an attempt to save what money we have left.

I'm not sure where to post this - it's just a vent.

I know this site is mostly geared towards NC Fathers but I'm sure my "issue" is one that most people have dealt with.


I live with my fiance who has a daughter with another woman. They broke up (well, she kicked him out) 3 years ago and BM is CP while fiance has some visitation. Right now he only has supervised visitation because of BM's allegations of drug abuse. They are going to court in 3 months.

The problem is BM started this court mess to get rid of me. BM and I have never really met and she knew nothing of me until fiance told her I was his girlfriend. She first started telling my fiance not to bring me around and then denied visitation.  Then she tried to get a court order barring me from visiation. That didnt work so she told the courts fiance was abusing drugs in hopes that I would get fed up and leave. Well I didn't and its a year later.

Two weeks ago we dropped a bunch of toys and a card off at fiances daughter's house as a surprise. BM just shrugged it off and asked when she was going to get a support check. This past weekend daughter was sick so we dropped off flowers, a card, a balloon and some stickers. This time I signed the card.

BM shrugged the gifts off again and told fiance she was seeing someone - a guy BM know's my fiance doesn't like and doesn't think should be around their daughter. She really isn't with anybody, since that was her reason for telling fiance not to bring me around - she doesnt think their daughter should be introduced to all of their "flings." BM was angry I signed the card and that I was trying to be involved.

I think it's really sad that on one hand BM rants that my fiance isn't involved with his daughter but then, on the other hand, she undermines everything he does and won't acknowledge he's a good father!

Isnt the child supposed to be the most important thing? Why is she worried about me signing a card?

This behavior from the BM is hurtfull to us and it's tramatic to their daughter. How should I handle attacks the BM (or CP) makes?

How should my fiance handle the BM when she does this?

Ugh, holidays........
 
Here's the problem: DH's ex and daughter are invited to (and attend) all of DH's family parties, even though DH and I are not invited. WTF?!?!?!

I cannot express how much this hurts us.
 
DH and BM were together for almost 10 yrs and were never married. Even after they broke up, DH and BM were still invited to family parties. This family is on DH's mother's side and things haven't been the same since she passed away. But it wasn't until BM took DH to court that his family stopped talking to him.
 
In the 2 years DH and I have been together, we've only been invited to ONE function. It was awkward, since it was the first time the family and I met and because BM was there. Needless to say, no one spoke to me because they were too busy chatting with BM!!
 
We are positive BM has told the family awful things about us. We don't know what she said exactly, but it obviously must have been something terrible for them to just cut all communication.
 

Should we just show up at the next party, uninvited? Should we send a letter to all of his family instead, telling them how we feel? How do you handle something like this???

Hello,

Recently, my fiance's ex told the courts he was abusing drugs and, as he undergoes evaluation, he can only see his daughter through supervised visits.

We have no idea what to expect (or think!) and we have no clue as to how you are supposed to be with the child or if you're supposed to just act normal. We figured it would be a little odd if we asked the evaluator what "the rules" are so I thought I'd post here first.

We were wondering what the rules are (if any), how these visits work, what are the supervisors "looking out" for and if the superviser can just take your child if they feel it's neccessary?

If anyone has any advice to offer your input would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.