Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Messages - notnew

#21
She works for her lawyer so I don't think fees are an issue for her unfortunately.

I'll wait and see what happens. If necessary, I'll pursue this in court to recoup my money, but know that I probably will never be paid if she is ordered to pay it back to me.

Another new chapter in my saga!
#22
Child Support Issues / RE: Flipped out on DCSE
May 17, 2007, 10:50:29 AM
Therapy for me too. That is why I am still checking the posts every day even though I haven't seen my kid for months.

Good luck. I am glad I'm a good dad and my ex has never had to experience what you are going through. As much animosity that is between her and me, I never wanted CS to be part of that equation. I just wish she would stop being angry about everything that has ever happened to her and get on with her life while ending the torment of our child and her perceived "punishement" of me by alienating our child from me.

My father ran from state to state to escape child support too. Back then it was easier to do that too (but it doesn't seem to have improved much has it?). He actually did this on the advice of his lawyer! Good thing I didn't learn from the example set for me!
#23
Child Support Issues / RE: Flipped out on DCSE
May 17, 2007, 06:41:22 AM
Dipper,

You know what your choices are. Either go on your crusade with all the heartburn that comes along with this type of thing or give up and live your life to the fullest with your kid and realize that there is nothing you can do to make this situation right.

Remember the wisdom prayer. It is just unreal that this can happen. We hear of cases where the system dogs people who are willing to pay and have REAL hard times and fall a little behind but pull themselves back up on their feet, we hear of cases where people are ordered to pay ridiculous amounts of CS leaving them unable to feed, house, or clothe themselves (I actually knew a guy who had CS taken out of his check and literally got a $1 paycheck - he quit his job that day), and then you hear cases like yours - a true deadbeat parent and the system is letting it happen.

I can certainly understand your frustration. I question though how effective you will be able to be realistically and what the price of your efforts will be on your own mental/physical health.

Obviously, the ultimate choice is up to you. I wish I could offer a real direction for you to take, but I just don't know of anything. If it helps any, you've got my sympathies and best wishes for resolution.
#24
Child Support Issues / RE: Flipped out on DCSE
May 17, 2007, 06:41:22 AM
Dipper,

You know what your choices are. Either go on your crusade with all the heartburn that comes along with this type of thing or give up and live your life to the fullest with your kid and realize that there is nothing you can do to make this situation right.

Remember the wisdom prayer. It is just unreal that this can happen. We hear of cases where the system dogs people who are willing to pay and have REAL hard times and fall a little behind but pull themselves back up on their feet, we hear of cases where people are ordered to pay ridiculous amounts of CS leaving them unable to feed, house, or clothe themselves (I actually knew a guy who had CS taken out of his check and literally got a $1 paycheck - he quit his job that day), and then you hear cases like yours - a true deadbeat parent and the system is letting it happen.

I can certainly understand your frustration. I question though how effective you will be able to be realistically and what the price of your efforts will be on your own mental/physical health.

Obviously, the ultimate choice is up to you. I wish I could offer a real direction for you to take, but I just don't know of anything. If it helps any, you've got my sympathies and best wishes for resolution.
#25
The agreement is effective jan 1 of this year. My ex and her attorney have dragged their feet on signing and then it was off to the court. It has been signed by the judge and is now on it's way to the OCSE.

I have $50 left on my retainer, I don't plan on calling the attorney. I was just wondering if anybody else out there had experienced this type of thing.

Yes, the court's will retroactively change child support in many cases.

No, the rules of the child support enforcement office are what will apply here. There are no "terms". The monthly amount was reduced period. I pay through an earnings witholding order that I put in place to keep my ex from making false allegations against me.

I was just curious. I suppose there aren't many people who have gone through this type of scenario so I will just have to wait and see what happens in the next few weeks.

I was just wondering how it would work. Since in the end I would have overpaid her roughly close to $1,000, will she owe me and will I have to take her court in a civil action to be repaid or will the OCSE simply modify my weekly witholding to give me the credit like when they tack on an extra $50 or so each week to pay arrearages except this is reversed. Or, will they cut me a check and refund me the difference? Who knows. I checked out the web site for the OCSE and of course, they don't cover this scenario at all. It seems in their opinion, deadbeat parents are behind or not paying at all.

Thanks anyway. I'll just wait and see.
#26
My CS order was modified and reduced. The agreement our lawyers worked out makes the order effective in January of this year.

The order was just signed by the judge two weeks ago and after checking today, I am told it should be completely processed in the court by the end of this week and then the copies will go to the OSCE where I have a witholding order in place to make sure I have records of the payments.

My question is this: How will OSCE handle the fact that I have been overpaying since January? I've been overpaying approximately $150.00 per month.

Will I get a  refund? Will my ex owe me the money? Will they reduce my weekly payment until the "extra" is paid?

Anybody out there with any experience in this area?
#27
Mist,

YES. I hate when advertiser's or people pushing an agenda end up on here.
#28
>• RIDICULOUSLY HIGH CHILD SUPPORT PAYMENTS?

The child support that is awarded via the courts usually doesn't even begin to cover the costs of raising a child.

>My CS amount was originally based on an average of my last three years of income. Even though I had changed jobs involuntarily and was making less then 1/2 of what I had been making before. Also, my ex NEVER supplied ONE piece of documentation proving her income and the court went on her WORD alone. Would they have done that for me? NO WAY. It was rectified later and I have gotten ONE pay stub from my ex in over 8 years of litigation. AND that pay stub was false. One look at it and I could plainly see it was a fabrication. However, I opted to settle rather then fight it out. The support went down to a reasonable amount and I do want my child taken care of. I just know that my ex is not getting what the child really needs with the money, but there is nothing I can do about that now is there? Because, there is no accountability for how CS is spent.

>• WAGES BEING GARNISHED?

This is a wonderful invention that takes away the games that some child support paying parents play.

>I asked for CS to go through CSE on a wage garnishment becuase my ex filed false charges against me saying I had failed to pay CS despite me having all my canceled checks with her signature for over 6 months worth of CS. All of them stated clearly on the memo line that they were for CS and an order was in place that I was complying with.

>Wage garnishment protects everybody. Not just the receiver of the CS.

>• BEING TREATED LIKE A THIRD CLASS CITIZEN?

>
>• BEING LABELED AS A "DEAD BEAT DAD"?

Pay your child support AND spend time with your child(ren) and this wouldn't apply to you.

> I have been discriminated against repeatedly by the CSE office. I had to push them to accept my application for garnishment through their office because they weren't going to accept it due to the expectation that my ex should have submitted the application. I finally got them to take it. I was in arrears for 6 weeks that was paid over time. When I knew the time was getting close, I contacted CSE to make sure they knew the arrears was almost paid up. No response ever. There are many other instances where I have been treated like scum of the earth. No matter that I have paid for all kinds of things for my child that is supposed to be covered by CS, but the mother just doesn't take care of for whatever reason. I do pay my CS and I spent as much time with my child as the court's allowed and that I could until the mother's PAS campaign was successful. I still let my child know I love her and when she is ready, I am here.

>You must understand that CSE shows the CS payments in such a way as to make almost everyone "behind" slightly. That way, their "collection" efforts look much better then they really are and they get MORE FEDERAL FUNDING AND GRANTS! This is the same as it works for public schools and standardized testing. The better the grades look, the more money the school gets. Result, teaching to these tests, outright cheating, and kids who can't read, write, or do simple math upon graduation.

> I do not agree with the stop child support now message and won't join their lawsuit. I think these types of actions make good dads look bad and makes our battles that much harder to fight and overcome. However, not everything they are saying is off the mark.

#29
Open your own case with DCSE and have the payments go through them for your own protection.  I did this and it has worked very well.

I had a few bumps in the road at the onset. I submitted the application along with the $25 processing fee. They called me at work telling me they were sending it back to me because my ex was supposed to be the one submitting it. I told them no way, that I wanted the payments to go through them to prove I was paying.

I've been going through them for over  7 years now.

Otherwise, send her a separate certified letter to her spelling out the date that you will be sending the money via certified mail each month and that unless it is 1 week overdue, she is to not contact you about it. Also that you will not be paying her in person and to please not discuss these things in front of the children. Let her know that if this behavior persists,  you will go to court to ask that the DCSE office open up a new case.

Good luck.
#30
This posting struck me as weird so I did a quick little search and Mr. Halsey appears to be a real person who lives in TN.

Last thing I saw on the net for him was from 12/06 and there is a SO in his life so I suppose the CS issue wan't the end of him.

The events we get dragged into going through these divorce, custody, and CS issues can oftentimes get overwhelming. I am sure many of us think of drastic measure fixes that really aren't a real solution to anyone's problems. Just a "fantasy" of "payback" in a difficult situation that is oftentimes made even more difficult by some of the players involved.

Usually, the end result is we by and large behave like responsible adults, pull ourselves up by out boot straps and figure out a way to get through the psychological and financial mess that we end up in. I am sure as with any traumtic life event, there are a few that don't make it and for whatever reasons, things end in tragic ways (we are all seeing the ANS tragedy unfold still).

Mr. Halsey has left information on the www that we all know opens him up to identity theft and Lord knows what else. He has been advised to remove this information, yet has failed to do so. His choice, but not an intelligent one.

However, it appears he has not "off'd" himself as far as I can tell and the post was not a "troll".

I certainly hope his financial issues were able to be resolved and that the courts have kept a hand in his contact with the children as I truly believe it should be monitored.

These loose cannons do us a world of damage in our quest for fair and equal justice in the family court.

Thought you all would appreciate an update!

BTW - his pic is posted on the net. No pizza boxes necessary!