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Not the mom who was willing to switch visitation.  The dad who states he wont sign w/out his atty's advise.

A huge aspect of these cases is looking at which parent is going to work with the other parent.  Neither of them are looking too good in that aspect.

I want advice that is going to be best for THE KIDS not MYSELF.  You want people to tell you that you are right and she is wrong and it isn't that black and white.  

Blaming her for everything isn't adult either.  BOTH parents have made mistakes.  I am not saying she is a good mother or deserves custody of the kids- I am saying it takes two people to get into this situation.

I also believe that the father should have just signed and taken the child since he believes the mother is so abusive.  The mother was doing him a favor by making the switch.  HE chose not to sign and leave the child there with a woman he is accusing of abusing the child.

I have YEARS of wisdom I could share with you.  But based on what I have read you only want advice that suits your needs.

Obviously you are upset.  I remember a time bm made us sign something and then refused to follow through the day before leaving us in a bind with ss.  But we still tried to maintain a relationship with her.

This probably wont be popular but we also moved out of state from bm- and I know alot of details in those cases as well.

You dont have to like everyones advice but you should try to learn from it.

Why do you come here looking for advice only to insult people?

That is so right on.

When bm told me she was moving again she said "You know how you and dh think I am a pathetic mom?" to which I replied "Yeah" and she said her married bf's wife is even worse then her.  I replied "Are you sure she is worse then you?"  BM didn't even get it she just laughed.  Yeah, I think that is funny.

#3 is so true too.  Although we have always won in court it didn't mean we were happy with the results.

You are saying only you can post here for support for your husband?  No other CP step moms mean anything because the world revolves around you?

I am a CP step mom for 7 years.  I came here to read about your situation b/c I had heard a member was going to be on Dr. Phil.

She was willing to switch if he signed something stating it.  SO SIGN IT.  Dont blame her for the fact that he would not sign and then the kids were upset and crying.

And dont think I dont know what they are dealing with.  I am a CP step mom who has been through more then 1 custody battle.  There still has to come a time someone becomes the adult.

Had he not been so stubborn to not sign it the kids would have been with him and not dealing with it from their mother.  He is mad she did that but the reason she did it was b/c he was trying to one up her.  If ALL the games stopped it would be better for the kids.

Why wouldn't he just sign it?  She was willing to make the time up.  My dh and his ex signed something everytime we made a switch- it protects everyone.