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Call the clerk of court for your county and ask what you need to do to have the case transferred.

The court with jurisdiction has to agree to it being moved though.  So I would wait until there is a pending motion and then file the request for relocation reasons.

I disagree that the courts want each child to have their own room.  I think that they want to see that the children have their own beds, and that they are not sharing a room with adults or with opposite gender children (after a certain age).  I can see there being an issue with you and your girlfriend not having a bedroom.  Everyone knows that couples are intimate, and there should be a measure of privacy available to you and the children that wouldn't be possible if you were sleeping in the living room.


I do agree that the courts aren't friendly towards co-habitation issues.  However, if the other party is also cohabitating it makes it a moot point.

Since he voluntarily left his job, it's unlikely that he will be able to get a modification for reduced income.  The state expects parents to support their children. 

She can take him back for non-payment if he's paying less than the ordered amount.

If he has another child, there should be an amount entered on line 3 for support of other children.  He can't count your children from other people as his dependents, only his biological children.  Do you pay daycare for any of his biological children?

His arrearages are based on the previous support order, not what his previous income was.  If the order changes, then it isn't backdated.  It starts when they new order goes into place, but isn't applicable to previous amounts owed.  Which, in your case, is a good thing since support went up.

It seems that the reason his support is so high is because of the child care costs.  In VA, they add child care costs to the total support obligation.  So his support obligation essentially doubled because of child care.

You should appeal this case with DCSE because your husband's income is less than 150% of the federal poverty guidelines.  In those cases, the obligation should be recalculated.  He can also request verification of the daycare expenses.  The numbers they used for the calculation are not sealed, and he should be able to see the file if he requests it.

File an ex parte motion.

Also, don't discuss the case with the child.  They need to be sheltered from this kind of thing as much as possible.  At his age, there is no chance that he will ever have to talk to the judge in front of his mom.  At most he'll talk to the judge in chambers, but it's more likely that he'll talk to a GAL and/or social worker than the judge.

Mediation is when you and the other party get together, with the help of a certified mediator, and try to work out a settlement so you don't have to go to court.  Usually the mediator expects both parties to put aside their differences and work towards a compromise that gives priority to the child's best interests.

Having read your other posts, I don't think it will be very successful.  But good luck.

Here is a link to the VA child support worksheet:  http://www.courts.state.va.us/forms/district/dc637.pdf (http://www.courts.state.va.us/forms/district/dc637.pdf)

Plug in the numbers and see if you get the same result.  The support/wages table can be found here:  http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+20-108.2 (http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+20-108.2)

If you come up with a different number I can give you more help. 

In our state, if the firm has ever represented a person, then that firm cannot ever represent the other side.  File a motion to have him removed and report it to the bar for your state.

I'm not sure.  I would try to get some advice from an attorney in your area.

Has there been a GAL assigned in the case?  Or ever?

[(http://<a)"3.05 Multiple Relationships]

I would suggest getting a lawyer, if there's any way you can afford it, to deal with the counselor.  Just the fact that she's willing to testify calls in to question her ethics.

Is she a LCSW, psychologist, LPC, what?  It's agains the APA's ethical guidelines for a psychologist to provide expert testimony regarding a client unless that relationship has been disclosed at the outset.  A treating psychologist cannot be an unbiased witness for the court.

Each specialty has it's own ethical standards, but they're all relatively close.  The fact that she is also treating the BM and her other child is a clear conflict.  She can treat them all together in family therapy, but not each one individually.  See the following excerpt from the APA manual:

(http://<a)"3.05 Multiple Relationships
(a) A multiple relationship occurs when a psychologist is in a professional role with a person and (1) at the same time is in another role with the same person, (2) at the same time is in a relationship with a person closely associated with or related to the person with whom the psychologist has the professional relationship, or (3) promises to enter into another relationship in the future with the person or a person closely associated with or related to the person.
A psychologist refrains from entering into a multiple relationship if the multiple relationship could reasonably be expected to impair the psychologist's objectivity, competence, or effectiveness in performing his or her functions as a psychologist, or otherwise risks exploitation or harm to the person with whom the professional relationship exists.
Multiple relationships that would not reasonably be expected to cause impairment or risk exploitation or harm are not unethical.
(//<A)(b) If a psychologist finds that, due to unforeseen factors, a potentially harmful multiple relationship has arisen, the psychologist takes reasonable steps to resolve it with due regard for the best interests of the affected person and maximal compliance with the Ethics Code.
(http://<a)(c) When psychologists are required by law, institutional policy, or extraordinary circumstances to serve in more than one role in judicial or administrative proceedings, at the outset they clarify role expectations and the extent of confidentiality and thereafter as changes occur. (See also Standards 3.04, Avoiding Harm (http://www.apa.org/ethics/code/index.aspx#304), and 3.07, Third-Party Requests for Services (http://www.apa.org/ethics/code/index.aspx#307).)"

You can find the whole manual here:  http://www.apa.org/ethics/code/index.aspx (http://www.apa.org/ethics/code/index.aspx)#

I would go after her on the basis of multiple relationships, and the fact that she can't be objective when it comes to the treatment of your child - especially in preserving the child's relationship with you (ie: causing no harm) when she is treating your ex on an individual basis. 

File an ethics violation against that counselor and ask the court to stop your ex from taking the child there, or to anyone who refuses to also include you in therapy.