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Hello

Today I went to file for food stamps.  
We have actually been eligible for a while but ex husband just lost his job so there will be no income there for dont know how long

OK fill out the application and case worker asks me if I want to apply for cash assistance.  I did not think I was eligible but he said he thought i was.

He says to apply for cash assistance i would have to use the child support system to go after dh and ex husband.  my exhusband has been paying support without the help of the support system in PA for 9 years and personally I like not having to wait for my money.

besides they lost one of my checks and they also returned one of my checks to my ex (accidentallycosting me almost a 1000)  

Do you know what this joker goes on to say.

He says well if bio dad dies what are you going to do then.

I say apply for SS death benefits..

He says that because i have taken cash payments from the dad instead of using the state support system for processing my child support that my kids will be ineligible for benefits.

I basically asked him where he got his info from and his response was that it was common knowledge down here.  

What the&*(^!!!!!!!!


I told him that to my knowledge he was totally wrong

\
called ss as soon as i got home and asked them if they had ever heard of such a thing ..

their response was


?????????????????????????


Now welfare is making stuff up to force moms into using the child support system ./...

I guarantee you that this line of bull $H09 will not be broadcasted much longer cause i am livid.

What do you all think of this?

hello everyone......

I have been a participant on this site for about 3 or 4 years now i would have to go check my paperwork for an exact date.  

i really think that this site is helping alot of people.  

A huge thank you to the owner and moderators.  

I have noticed that many of the people that have found this site in time to do some damage control have gotten great if not fantastic results.


We now have shared custody and a set visitation .. our support order was finally lowered over 500 a month.  No more alimony (thank God)

I have been seeing that raising awareness and just telling people where to find the resources that they need and pointing them in the right direction has helped numerous people get good results with out spending 10,000 on an attorney.  We unfortunately spent way more than that and got no where to begin with until finding this site.  

the resources are there if you know how to find them and learn how ato use them.

A big God Bless to all of you (SOCRATEASER) too........

Just a thank you for all you do..

rini

dear Socrateaser,

One of my very best friends died last week at the age of 49 from a heart attack.

The last few years he lived with his gf and her daughter (all of the rules for PA common law apply to this situation.

The estate is not extensive but as he was disabled and only lived on SSD his gf paid the majority of the bills and mortgage payment with her 36,000 a yr salary and her child support that she recieved she used for her daughter.

Where and how does she go about having a judge declaring their union common law after the fact.  This would be the easiest solution for the family (his mom , dad , and brother  also because there would not be any estate transfer taxes ect ect ect..

She realizes that she would be responsible for all his debts including funeral expenses .

She would like to keep the house and have it transferred to her name.

Not really any equity in the house either but she would like to continue in it as her home.

QUESTION  Where does she start????

I am not sure whether she petitions the family court first to be declared his common law wife and brings her witnesses and or affidavits here or if she does this in the probate court.


any help would obviously be very much appreciated because we have no idea where to begin and this sort of thing is not a popular topic.

Thank you and God Bless,

rini

I have a friend who has a son going through the usual sh&*

divorce in progress
\
visitation denial

petition for custody

no temporary order

psycho spits on him he returns the favor. admittedly not the smartest move but ce sera sera,....


no physical contact.

cops called they witnessed no signs of distress thus no report.

it is mandatory to report in our state or so I am told.

she files for pfa based on all kinds of bull sh%&.... stuff never happened obviously her attorney probably told her too.

first off????


he has visitation she is agreeing to meet him with child at fire station.

she has temp pfa that includes child.


state of pa does not involve police in visitation disputes.

should he meet her and just use recorder (video)

or should he forgo visit until after hearing on monday?


My next question is does he file a brief in his defense or what.

any ideas??? heaing is on monday morning no time for filing a responsive plea. just time to type a motion for temporary relief or show cause..

HELP?????

thank you for your time

God Bless!!!!

 dear Socrateaser

Hello

I have a question for you about what would be the controlling order for medical reimbursement.

Facts..

Child support order  with order for medical is in Pennsylvania

Custody order/ parenting plan is in Florida.

Kids and exwife live in Florida.

We live in PA where child support is calculated along with a medical insurance coverage for my DH to cover the kids.  Child support order in PA since 1995.

Child support order stipulates to amount $$$ for 2 children and orders him to pay for medical insurance.

PA child support order also stipulates that there is a 250 per child deductable per year.  until he has to reimburse her.  


Now here is the tricky part Florida parenting plant that I prepared has that (BOTH) parents are to cover the children on their medical plans and that they will split the costs 50 /50  with 30 days notice and 30 days for submition of payment.

She doesn't carry the kids on her medical.

She just submitted to me a request for payment for a visit for a broken arm in September.  She says she mailed once before also requests for payments for copayments for doc visits.  ( there would be no copay if there were 2 insurances primary and secondary.)  Says we owe her 161.00  I think we owe her nothing...


Which state controls the medical reimbursement????  Pa or Florida?


If you need more information i will happily supply.


What would be the way to reply to this?


Thank you for your time in advance

God Bless

Dear Socrateaser,

I am still helping my husbands friend with his exceptions to his support order.

The hearing officer has errored now on 2 different child support orders.

Our motion for exceptions to the first order was granted in August on all issues that we addressed in our motion.  This was sent back to the same hearing officer that did the first miscalculation.\

Hearing on the exceptions was in front of the same hearing officer in November.  The hearing officer did not allow time to address all the issues that were granted for recconsideration and basically told him to file for more exceptions  (which we did)

The new order issued in Dec was not nearly correct either.  

1  How do we ask that someone else hear this and calculate the order.

She was off again on wages (for both parties)\
She ignored issues that were remanded for recconsideration
She back dated new dental that just started last month for payment all the way back to last year.

She refused to allow his credit for medical for kids (he has carried them on insurance for years but new wife got a new job last summer/spring and added the kids to her plan.  Hearing officer gave her credit even though she did not supply the needed document to remove the kids from his federal plan until NOv hearing.

ect ect ect.

This woman can't add and is clearly biased to say the least.

She also did not use the standard form for calculation required by the state.  

2  Can we ask that the ex be held in contempt and sanctioned for telling two different stories at 2 different hearings under oath (taped and transcribed) about why she only worked 10 to 13 hours a week.  One she said there were no hours and the other hearing she blamed ex husband for pickup and drop off.

 Kids are in teens and mom has no reason not to work.  PA state imputes income for parents that work less than 40 hours on a regular basis.  (for both parents unless there are small children or a disability factor.  Is this not perjury????



3    After we filed our motion for exceptions they filed a cross-exceptions citing 2 issues? do we answer in one brief or two?  Some of the stuff i have is pretty long winded due to the huge mistakes do I cut the statements down to minimum or make sure i have all the facts in there for the record?


Thank you so much for your help  

By the way hubby had his second Christmas holiday with his children thanks to all your help  2nd one in 10 years.   !!!!!  God Bless you for all you do

rini in PA

Dear Socrateaser

i am currently assisting a friend of my husband with his child support matter.

He has motioned the court for exceptions to the interim order and hopes to have it calculated by the guidelines as stated instead of the hearing officer using the new math .

There are several mistakes on his interim order including the following

HIs income was calculated and stipulated to during the hearing.  the hearing officer took the liberty of  adding in his VA amount (extra 500 )over again bring his net from 3500 to 4000 a month and increasing the award from 860 to over 1000 a month also adding in an arrearage that does not exist.

Pa has a system called PACES and the amount of arrearage stipulate to at hearing was approx 800 ..  the hearing officer gave him credit for 2 weeks that ex left kids in his custody brought the arearage to less than 300.  the last few payments having been reduced by not nearly enough will put him well past oweing any thing to an arrearage in fact she will owe him now.



OK now for the questions

He is in need of a professional brief in support of his motion for his exceptions.

I was helping him draft  this and was wondering

1 what should it be titled.   BRIEF IN SUPPORT OF  Petitioners MOTION FOR EXCEPTIONS?  or am i way off.


2  Obviously we are going to address the mistakes but what would be a professional beginning to start this particular type of brief.

3 do we need to cite case law or just point out the mistakes and the statutes that should have been followed.

God Bless and thank you

 rini

Dear Socrateaser



1   Is there a statute of limitations on civil actions against the perpertrators of molestation?  (molested from the time they were 6 til they were 12 ).

2  If the perpetrator has assets how hard would it be to find representation for something like this?

Thank you

rini

Dear Socrateaser;

My husbands best friend went in for a support modification and is filing a motion for exceptions in PA.

The hearing officer came up with one amount in court and sent out an order with another amount 140 more than what was calculated.
Guidelines show 860 and over 1000 was ordered

kids are 12 and 13 and mother was permitted to locate for a job 3 hours away so new calculation allowed for new job wages and ended alimony.

He is filing this motion pro se because his attorney really has not helped a whole lot so far and he has paid almost 20,000 in legal fees already.

Our state takes into account court orders for other children already in place and he was never given any credit.  350 a month for other support order.  Last child emancipates in June.  so he is still technically paying child support for another couple months.

they also addressed the fact that he contributed toward the mortgage for 2 years and she never used the money for the home and allowed the mortgage to default thus loosing the home.  (the courts should have attributed this to a credit for him also)  .

all of these things were brought up numerous times in hearings and were ignored by the hearing officer.

He also took the kids for over 2 weeks during the ex wifes move and they were supposed to credit the support for these 2 weeks.

Questions

1 because some of these things were addressed already can he address the issues again in his motion for exceptions (first appeal of support order)

There are statutes addressing each topic above except for the money toward the mortgage.

2 Can the support amount be calculated retroactively to first date of calculation because of their refusal to allow credit for the other child support paid even though there is very clear wording and directions as to how to calculate this into a support order in our state guidelines

Thank you and God Bless

rini

Friends

Last night I took dinner over for my mom.  When I got there she was already with God.
After surviving a mastectomy last summer God decided it was her time and took her from us.  She was a wonderful giving loving Grandmother of 10 mom of 5 and my best friend.

I appreciate your prayers

thank you and God bless

rini

Anyone,


I have a friend who has a son going through the usual sh&*

divorce in progress
\
visitation denial

petition for custody

no temporary order

psycho spits on him  he returns the favor.  admittedly not the smartest move but ce sera sera,....


no physical contact.

cops called  they witnessed no signs of distress thus no report.

it is mandatory to report

she files for pfa based on all kinds of bull sh%&....   stuff never happened obviously her attorney probably told her too.

first off????


he has visitation she is agreeing to meet him with child at fire station.

she has temp pfa that includes child.  


state of pa does not involve police in visitation disputes.

 should he meet her and just use recorder  (video)

or should he forgo visit until after hearing on monday?


My next question is does he file a brief in his defense or what.

any ideas???  heaing is on monday morning no time for filing a responsive plea.  just time to type a motion for temporary relief or show cause..

HELP?????


thank you all

rini

In wealthy Kirtland, Ohio, the contested surrogate triplets are called Lane, Easton and Shane Flynn when visiting their biological father, James Flynn, at his $600,000 home.


 
   


  Previous article
Egg donor enters battle for custody of triplets (7/7/04)


   
   

 


In rural Corry, Erie County, they are Matthew, Mark and Micah Bimber when with their surrogate mother, Danielle Bimber, in her $85,000 ranch home.

Yesterday the two families seeking custody of the three boys argued the value of names, affluence and parenting skills. Their disputes since the boys were born Nov. 19 to Bimber under contract with Flynn played out before Erie County Common Pleas Judge Shad Connelly.

Earlier, Connelly named Bimber, 30, the babies' legal mother, though she has no genetic connection to them. He gave her temporary custody. Now Connelly must decide who gets permanent custody. The hearing will continue later this month.

Flynn, 62, wants exclusive custody of the boys. He said he and his fiancee, Eileen Donich, 60, tried several years ago to have a baby of their own, including fertility treatments, and when that was unsuccessful, turned to surrogacy. He provided the sperm, paid a Texas woman for her eggs and gave Bimber $20,000 to carry the resulting embryos.

He said during the hearing he would do anything to get the babies from Bimber. "The person who has them now has no connection at all. We paid her."

The egg donor has filed suit as well in Ohio in an attempt to obtain parental rights to the babies. It remains unclear what would happen if the Ohio court's decision conflicts with Connelly's. Connelly earlier rejected the possibility that the egg donor could serve as a parent because she hadn't sought rights in his court.

Bimber said she wanted the money from the surrogacy contract for her three older children's education and that she intended to turn the babies over to Flynn. But when he visited them only once during the week they were in the hospital and neglected to obtain the legal papers necessary for the hospital to turn them over to him, she took them home.

In an earlier proceeding Connelly granted Flynn and Donich visits with the babies, including four-day spans.

Flynn was ordered to pay child support of $25,000 a year. His lawyer suggested that money was the real motivation for Bimber's request to retain primary physical custody.

Bimber, who acknowledged filing for personal bankruptcy last year, said during a break in the hearing, "As far as money goes, it is money. It is not love." She contended that Flynn and Donich haven't purchased normal baby accessories and returned the children unbathed and with untreated diaper rash. "I don't think these people should have kids," Bimber told reporters.

Flynn and Donich declined comment.

During the hearing, their lawyer, Melissa H. Shirey, accentuated the class differences.

Flynn, who has a doctorate from the University of California at Berkeley in statistics, is a professor and department head at Cleveland State University, earning more than $136,000 a year. Donich, a retired dentist, owns the 6,000-square-foot home where they live. Flynn also maintains an apartment for himself a few minutes from his campus office.

Donich, a widow, said both of her children from the earlier marriage are physicians. "I made them superstars," she told the court. And, later, she said she plans to do the same with the triplets: "They are going to be superstars."

Flynn derided the Corry area as depressed and said its schools would be, as a result, underfunded and underachieving. Kirtland schools, where the boys would go if they lived with him and Donich, are among the best in Ohio.

Neither Bimber has a college degree. She worked as an exercise instructor at a Curves salon, earning $11,000 a year, before she was bedridden during pregnancy with the triplets. Her husband, Douglas, earns about $9,160 a year as an appliance repairman. She has two children from her first marriage and a child with Bimber. So with the triplets, there are eight people living in her 2,200-square-foot ranch.

Still, Bimber told the court she has been able to provide the triplets with car seats, cribs, strollers, bouncers, high chairs, toys, clothes and satisfy their every need. She said she may not have much money, but is willing to spend it on the children. All of the money she got under the surrogacy contract, she said she has spent on the babies.

She questioned the care the babies receive from Flynn and Donich, and they tried to impeach her mothering abilities.

Flynn told the court, "The last year has been the most horrible period of my life ... It is very wrenching because I do not think the children have been taken care of."

He and Donich contended that the children wheeze because of cat hair and dust in Bimber's home.

Also, Donich charged that each of the babies loses a pound every time they are in Bimber's care. Donich said she's able to fatten them up by a pound in the four days she has them.

The allegations were disputed by the Bimbers' family physician, Dr. Kurt Lund. He said the triplets are growing and gaining weight normally. He also said wheezing suffered by the two boys was a result of a virus and not allergies.

Bimber testified at length about how she cares for the babies and the difference in their personalities. She has served as their primary caretaker since they were born. Bimber's lawyer asked, since she has no biological connection to them, what she was to them.

Nose red, and crying, she said, "I am their mom."

The hearing, which was opened to the public because of an appeal by the Erie Times-News, is scheduled to continue with additional testimony from Bimber on July 29.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Barbara White Stack can be reached at [email protected] or 412-263-1878.)

hello everyone

i really need some imput here on this one.  after spending years on my current husbands custody case now it looks like i get to spend the next few months on my own case.

I have had quite a few medical problems and after much postponement i finally agreed to a much needed hysterectomy performed with a large degree of reconstructive surgery on my nether regions due to carrying 6 children.  

This is my 3rd major surgery in 2 1/2 years and i have been a sahm for the last almost 3 years since i got hurt very badly when i was almost 7n months pregnant.  

I made arrangements and had my current husband and my oldest son supervising the 12, 14 and almost 15 yr old while i spent 4 days in the hospital. The younger ones were with my mom and brother..   well while i was in my current husband and my 15 yr old got into a screaming match and dh did smack child in the face.  Right before this happened 12 yr old daughter was found on floor with almost 16 yr old boy over top of her and her clutching a bloody nose (neither of them were in their own perspective rooms where they were told to be cleaning.  i have been begging bio dad to step in with 15 yr old for quite some time now with no results or even any sort of help at all.  15 yr old does nothing he is asked and is generally totally disrespectful to sd not to mention me.

Now i do realize that my husband should not have hit him expecially hard enough to leave a red mark and a small bruise on his cheek bone.
this is however the first and only time that he has allowed himself to act his anger out on the step kids.  Even though my second oldest son basically treats him like dog dooty and always has.  for some reason he blames tom for breaking my ex and i up mean while ex lives with gf he has been with for over 10 yrs (his words to his kids ) we have only been seperated for over 8 LOL.

well son wants to stay with dad and sm now and refuses to come home.

i have full legal custody his dad partial custody with visitation as per my whim..  

SD has agreed to go to counseling  blah blah blah which is more than my ex would ever do to keep the family together.  

my son is milking this and playing it to the hilt.  now he has his dad in his pocket this is the same dad that i cant get to excercise his visitation on any sort of regular basis.

this has been going on for 2 weeks now and cys had an interview with all of  us last week and told us we would hear more in 30 to 60 days.

i have known that my son does not like his sd for quite some time now but i never though that he would make me choose.  that is now what he is asking me to do is basically throw my husband out.

this is not the first time his sd has disciplined him but it is the first time he has done any thing other than a quick tug of the hair or a little
motivational screaming or
taking away all privledges.  sd can be scarry when he screams though..

i dont know what to do or if i should just let it continue.

i am not really concerned for his safety i would like them to do a home visit there and make the bd and sm clean the place though it is disgusting by any ones standards.

his dad works all the time so basically he is just sitting in the house playing video games while the sm lays on the couch and watches tv

things are much quieter and also cleaner here.  one less person but i cant bring myself to just let him go ..

help please???

God Bless
rini