Topics

81

Second Families / Hearing # 2 DONE!

« on: Oct 22, 2005, 05:33:03 pm »

I was actually looking forward to this last hearing. Man am I glad I had my lawyer along. He caught SM twice for lying to a cop to try and have me arrested.

Brief re-cap:

BF and SM and I just went through a year long court battle to modify some things in our J & D. Meanwhile SM became totally crazy and had tried to kill herself several times and so on and so on and basically has made our lives hell since a week after their marriage. 4 days after the new order came...on came the TRO and for once, I had not done anything or even spoke to them to get a TRO.

Fast forward:

My lawyer served her (SM) up and ate her for lunch and then spit her out and then the judge fried her back up and ate her for dessert! We went all throught their evidence first, she went on and on about the GAL report this, and the GAL report that, which none of it was relevant because the GAL report was thrown out and the final orders (which are in another county) were final and mentioned nothing of what the GAL had to say.

She was extremely snotty to my lawyer and kept asking my lawyer questions while she was up there, and she tried her darndest to be Perry Mason, but it just wasn't going well for her. The judge said "Ma'am, you don't get to ask the questions"..."your being questioned, so answer the questions please." (I wrote that all down word for word as he was saying it, her look was priceless!)

They tried to set me up twice by lying to the cops about our court orders and had a county attorney actually working on it that I have a warrant set up. My lawyer caught her lying several times it was just unreal.

I also had a witness from my place of employment that testified she has heard conversations of her calling me at work, all of our work phones are recorded so it was easy for my co-worker to hear them, she gladly testified to her craziness and of her calling me constantly at work.

My wiener ex didn't have much to say, he let her do all the talking on his behalf again. I couldn't believe it. He just sat there. My lawyer had fun questioning him though. He admitted that he doesn't take any phone calls from me and that he intentionally makes me speak to his wife, and he thinks it is ok for her to make all the decisions. Judge wasn't happy about that at ALL.

My lawyers summation was beautiful, he said judge, we have the right parties here but the wrong plantiff. Plain and simply it is in fact her (SM)harrassing my client.

The judge said there is no way I am opening another case in this county because this case should be in my county, it should also be in family court, and then he turned to SM and said Ms. XXXX, you need to stay out of it. Keep your nose to yourself, these two people have children together and there should be no reason for the two females to ever speak to eachother, as he was looking at BF. Then he looks at her and said I do not believe BM has done anything wrong, and this proceeding is dismissed. He then looks at SM and said, the SM is the problem in this case, and stay out of it. So, I was pretty happy to the outcome of this one. After court they vanished into thin air, I bet he slept on the couch that night.

....and another no show for visitation..which I am kind of glad they didn't go, I can't imagine what she would have said to them this weekend.

82

Second Families / I am going to freak out...calling all the reinforcements please!!!!!!! LONG

« on: Sep 29, 2005, 04:52:03 pm »

Ok some of you know or may not know that BM and I (SM) were in an altercation this summer over something VERY stupid.  Rather than debate her I simply told her she can speak to DH about it and I went to shut my door during an exchange.  One child was already in her car and the other was in the kitchen with me, she told me she would not be speaking to him and before I could get the door shut she pushed the door and me down our stairs and attempted to get in...blah blah blah...

Long sotry short we were both charged with 5th degree assault and our trials are still in the works.

Fast forward.... there were TRO's granted on both of us and we are to have "no contact" is all the order says, no distance away from eachother nothing just no contact.

Ok last week there was an exchange, I accompanied 1. because DH refuses to go alone. 2. I exchange my children down the road just a half an hour later.  I DID NOT  come in contact with her by being in the car and I even consulted a police officer BEFORE the exchange to see if it would be a problem, in fact we were about 25 to 30 yards or so from her and the dang exchange is at a police station..does anyone see a problem here???  I was told as long as we didn't "come in contact" with eachother or approach the other it was ok.  (our exchanges are in a different town..half way points)  We were saving on gas AND my exchange is right after...seems logical right?

Not even 30 minutes went by and the police contacted me, they said that they were getting the orders faxed and if I had violated the orders he would call me back otherwise, he didn't need to bother me.  I said OK.  I did not get a call.

Pick up on Sunday, same routine, except she was not present, her boyfriend brought them and we had a civil standby this time.  I never even glanced in his direction.

TODAY!!!   I was served with a motion to change the TRO for me to have NO CONTACT  with even the children at their events..any events, nothing.  She is asking that I not be allowed to attend any "games, conferences, programs, field trips", you name it,  anything concerning the children I not be a part of.. and it gets better...she is requesting that "I have no third party contact of any kind, her kids (my ss), her EX husband (my current husband) and ANY family member they share jointly or anyone or anyother possible third party she knows".

*WTF* is she seriously putting a no contact order on MY husband and her children?  Has she totally lost it?

Ok I have vented, now what the hell am I going to do?  Is it possible for her to make sure I never be a part of the children's lives again?  LOL when I write it out it sounds stupid but when I read her affidavit over and over I'd like to go over there and choke the living crap out of her!!!!

I am the custodial step-mother.  If you really wanted to compare nuts to bolts I am actually their primary care taker, yes I know Step moms don't mean shit and I should let the BM parent how she likes and blah blah blah, and I would,  if she EVER participated a day in her life and didn't suck off welfare and Social security and defraud every Govt. agency known to man.

The only thing I got going for me on this one is her attorney is on a leave of absence and my court date is during that time and I have an attorney who has to DRIVE an hour and half which right there cost me 400.00 and another probably 1000.00 to open his mouth.

Please give me some words of wisdom to fend off the spawn of satan herself.  I mean it,  I really think she was born of Lucifer, there is just no other explanation for this woman.

HELP before I am put in a straight jacket!!!!!

83

Second Families / Missed visits...

« on: Sep 10, 2005, 09:27:31 am »

After 16 scheduled visits, and only showing up for 2, how many more do I have to go to before enough is enough? So I can save the heart break, tears and gas money driving to meet a dead beat parent?

I would just like to know how long we must put up with this crap!!!

84

Second Families / Drivers license suspended...

« on: Aug 31, 2005, 01:22:54 pm »

Ahhh, sweet bliss that finally BM has had some kind of a rule implemented on her, except... like I should be surprised, she is still driving the kids around during her time..

She always covers her bases though, she lives in another town so she drives to her boyfriends house, then he brings them to the drop off point, then she drives back home.

Anyone have any ideas on how she can be caught?

85

Second Families / TRO help

« on: Jul 26, 2005, 02:43:01 pm »

I posted this on Soc's board, I am just wondering if anyone else has had an altercation with an abusive BM...any suggestions are appreciated

Background info:

BM/NCP came to pick up for second half of summer vacation. We had purchased a cell phone for the children to take along so we could speak to them as well as they would have access to call 911 in case of an emergency. BM in habit of leaving kids alone and she has no phone. Kids instructed to call for help if left alone.

BM sent child back to the door with the phone and would not allow it, even though she wrote an email thanking us for getting them one for her to also communicate with them.

I told her she could wait for DH and she could discuss it with him and I went to shut the door. She shoved open the door and pushed me down a flight of stairs. She went totally crazy and long story short we now have a TRO on her and are due in court next week for it.

In late June we were provided (voluntarily) a psych eval she had done on herself and is trying to collect SSI due to the results and get out of child support. We have NEVER had an incident like the one I just described with her EVER. As far as we knew she was just evil but has some serious diagnosis.

I have been out of work since the accident and I have multipy injuries due to the fall, to my knowledge she has very minor to no injuries because I fought back.

We are both being charged for assault even though she broke into my home and induced bodily harm.

My questions are:

1. At the TRO hearing what should I ask for to keep it from being dismissed? We already know she has a mental health history, anything we can ask for to get concrete evidence that she is not fit to have children around her?

Any further help or suggestions will be greatly appreciated!!

86

Second Families / Child placement...

« on: Jul 05, 2005, 08:40:56 pm »

Has anyone or has anyone known someone that has had a niece, nephew, or a cousin placed with them through social services?

We are curently in the loop with grandparents to have a child placed with us permanently due to the parents not abiding by court orders or they just plain can't raise the child and drugs are a factor as well.
I was just looking for some tips on how to better my home and get it ready for an inspection...

Anyone have some ideas?  I'll take it!!

Thanks!!  :)

87

Second Families / I swear it never ends....Need Help fast!

« on: Jun 02, 2005, 08:27:23 pm »

Maybe when I'm dead all the chaos will stop...and even then I think it would continue "up there".

New dilema.  PBFH has petitioned to have CS "suspended" for 90-120 days due to an alleged assault and now suffering from Post Traumatic Stress syndrome...(yeah right, we won't get into that) in her affidavit it says.."I am simply not able to cope with work and the children".

How on earth would you take that?  She can't deal with both or one or the other or what??

She is already looney tunes but we have never been able to prove anything because I swear if you asked her if the sky was purple and she said it was, a lie detector would say she was telling the truth.  She is quite the actress and the judge in our case is always on her side.

Now our dilema, kids are to go for first 2 week summer visit tomorrow, knowing what we know for only a few days, would you let them go or would you file something to finally get a psych eval done on her?  This can of worms is not something we really want to open, but we would really like to get the psych eval done to make sure she is competent to be watching the kids.  Well she is a horrible parent, but this just adds to the list of things we are concerned about.

Any suggestions? We are in for a mighty court battle if we go ahead with the "post poned visit" until we see or get to the bottom of this.  She has an unlimited free lawyer BTW, and we would have to hire one.  What would you file a restraining order?  A motion for supervised visits and psych eval?  Need help, any help, suggestions, good or bad...

Thanks!

88

Second Families / UNREAL!!

« on: May 19, 2005, 06:01:24 pm »

BF has already given up Father's day!  I just don't get it.  I guess all I can say is finally they will get to spend the holiday with the man that gives a crap about them and takes care of them everyday!  

I can't even put into words how I am feeling right now.  Psycho step moms suck!

Thanks for the vent!

89

Second Families / I think someone is listening.....

« on: May 14, 2005, 06:44:12 am »

Yesterday was interesting! God has to be listening!  Little backgound:  BF has a new wife.  She is bi-polar and we (me and kids) are her target at all low times.  BF had a restraining order on her but later dropped it, I had a restraining order and my lawyer screwed it up but she had been kindof careful not to come near me anymore.  That was all in Oct.

Got assigned a guardian, who spent exactly one minute on our case.  They lied their a$$e$ off and she believed every word. (Bi-polar people are MASTER actors, and can twist anything into roses).  Needless to say the guardian didn't believe me.  Her dr. the guardian interviewed said she hadn't had any relapses in over a year and she was a model parent.

Since the order SM has been in full swing.  After the guardian's report I knew she did not look deep enough into her background so I took it upon myself to dig even deeper.

I just received about 7 reports from BF on her and his concern for his other children.  She has been admitted twice and the last time was in DECEMBER of 04 and the Sheriff spoke directly with the doctor the guardian interviewed and had her admitted on a 72 hour mental hold...but no relapese in over a YEAR??!!!?!

I am livid!  That guardian should be fired!  Anyone have any suggestions at what kind of recourse I can take against her?  Write a letter, call her boss?  What should I do??  Meanwhile SM has had about 34 suicide attempts and one in Oct. she almost succeeded, but hey that is not considered a relapse!!

I am desperate for any help.  This woman has some serious issues, although the BF has stopped reporting her, I know there is still major things going on there.  The children have to be hurt for anyone to listen to me.

I guess this is a vent, thanks for listening, but most of all I want that guardian's butt on a platter!!!!!

90

Second Families / Losing my mind...HELP!!

« on: Apr 07, 2005, 03:09:43 pm »

I have recently been in a court proceeding with my children's BF.  It is a nightmare!!  The SM is clinically depressed as well as bi polar and has attempted to her life SEVERAL times and is now on to threatening mine (BM) and our children.  

Long story short the GAL AGREED she had a long mental health history, she AGREED that she threatened our lives, she AGREED that the incidents that I described occured, but DIDNOT see anything wrong with her having children in her care!

They lied through their teeth right down to changing the parenting schedule that we had and fabricating it to what they really wanted and said that was how it had been for X amount of years.

It is unbelievable!!!  Now since the GAL report is in and in their favor, of course they think this is all over and I am supposed to hand over the children.  Now I am all for them seeing their BF, never blocked, never alienated, never nothing, always supported their relationship with their dad, I just don't trust the SM.

I have been through this before with my DH EXW, but I must have amnesia because for the life of me I can't remember what comes next, do I file a motion?  I have some stipulations I would like added to the order if they are to go back there, but he won't agree to anything.

I am at my wits end trying to compromise and be the bigger person.  I have prayed my brains out trying to find the right path, but my gut keeps saying, get some rules in place, get some rules in place, so they are protected while at their BF's house.

Anyone have any suggestions on how to combat 2 liars and a GAL that bought their story hook, line, and sinker?


Any and all suggestions welcome!