I don't know where to begin with this. I'm new to computers and forums and such and desperately need help!
I'll explain my situation as honestly and accurately as possible. It will seem unbelievable and you'll say, "There's got to be more to it" but this is basically it:
My wife and I have lived a very conservative Christian life much like the Amish/Mennonites. We both entered into this life style and beliefs by our own desire just before our first child was born over 8 years ago( we now have four). Suddenly-and I mean this- without any warning, any problems, without any prior discussions my wife filled for divorce and left. Everyone that knew us said we were like to peas in a pod. The perfect marriage. My wife was a stay at home mom and I worked part time. We were debt free and doing well in almost every area of our lives. I never would have dreamed this would happen.
But it gets worse:
The first attorney(local) I went to said that I didn't have a chance. He said that the judge will not give joint custody with joint time each even though my wife and I at the time agreed to it. He said most of the time the women gets the children and the man get's to "visit" his children every other weekend. He said that he "doesn't like you type of people" and is going to give her sole custody. He said that he is "bias and does what ever he wants". He warned me that he will base child support on a job I had just gotten at my wife's request. A job I had for four weeks! He refused to represent me.
I didn't believe him and found another attorney and went to trial. Over forty people came to support me. My wife had four. The evidence brought forth seemed overwhelming in my favor. My attorney argued that my wife and I entered into this lifestyle before the children were born and this is the only life the children have known. He argued that I live in a payed for home right in the religious community that has all my childrens friends and loved ones in it. That through out the childrens lives we have not been in need of anything. The children were all healthy and happy. There was nothing ever mentioned about me being unfit or a problem in any way even by her witnesses. Testimony was brought in that I have always been with my children. I even delivered one myself. I was part time so I could be home with my children. Her witnesses had no problems testifying, but my witness were yelled at and made fun of(some on tape). He said he didn't understand a children being disciplined and that children should be free to do what they want. He said that they should have TV and internet and live "normal" lives. He constantly tried to keep "religion" out of it saying it has nothing to do with what's in the best interest in the children(yet he uses religion against me in his descision).
Several days after the trial the court recorder ran into one of my witnesses and told him that the judge is biased against your people and often isn't even mainstream in his views. He said he makes his decisions on his own biases. Several weeks after that the judges cousin who often works for the Mennonites in our area told some of them that the judge was angry that they dared to show up at his courtroom since they don't do anything for society. He also said that the judge doesn't like them.
Finally after 4 months of waiting the judge made his descision. I couldn't believe it. In fact my wife's attorney was suprised. The judge went completely beyond what even my wife was asking for. He gave her everything he possibly could. She got sole custody. He split a large non marital money gift from my parents. He gave me several things I have never owned and gave her all the farm stuff. In no way was the property divided equally. He took a seperate paragraph and told me I "need to understand" some things and called my beliefs "deplorable". He said my shedding of tears was a "sham". He said that my dad's and my testimony was "factually incorrect"(I guess I lie). And yes he did end up basing my child support payment on a job I had for four weeks. He said that he understands that I don't have a job and that I live off the land but said that I am capable of making that kind of money so he's basing it on that.
Now more bad news:
My state has no laws keeping my wife here. She is allowed to move wherever she wants to. The local judges are given much power. This is a no fault state. It is a back woods area(once the judges nephew who is a sherrif deputy served me a notice that the local family services was sueing me for child support and medical insurance. This was signed by the prosecuter who is the judge,s cousin not to be confussed with the cousin who works for the local wildlife division or the other nephew who is the dog warden or another nephew who is also a deputy.)I have appealed this but my new attorney says that he as no doubts that the judges will see that this is a bad desicsion but they don't like to over turn the local judge's descision. They want them to have the power. No attorney I've talked with doubts that the judge was biased and stepped on my constitutional rights but said that's just the way it is here. My attorney said my wife is in the driver's seat and I need to listen to her because if she goes before this judge she is likely to get whatever she wants. Both attorney's of mine say they have never seen anything like this. One of those attorneys has been working for 44 years.
I seem to have exausted all my options. Absollutely any suggestions would be welcome.
I'll explain my situation as honestly and accurately as possible. It will seem unbelievable and you'll say, "There's got to be more to it" but this is basically it:
My wife and I have lived a very conservative Christian life much like the Amish/Mennonites. We both entered into this life style and beliefs by our own desire just before our first child was born over 8 years ago( we now have four). Suddenly-and I mean this- without any warning, any problems, without any prior discussions my wife filled for divorce and left. Everyone that knew us said we were like to peas in a pod. The perfect marriage. My wife was a stay at home mom and I worked part time. We were debt free and doing well in almost every area of our lives. I never would have dreamed this would happen.
But it gets worse:
The first attorney(local) I went to said that I didn't have a chance. He said that the judge will not give joint custody with joint time each even though my wife and I at the time agreed to it. He said most of the time the women gets the children and the man get's to "visit" his children every other weekend. He said that he "doesn't like you type of people" and is going to give her sole custody. He said that he is "bias and does what ever he wants". He warned me that he will base child support on a job I had just gotten at my wife's request. A job I had for four weeks! He refused to represent me.
I didn't believe him and found another attorney and went to trial. Over forty people came to support me. My wife had four. The evidence brought forth seemed overwhelming in my favor. My attorney argued that my wife and I entered into this lifestyle before the children were born and this is the only life the children have known. He argued that I live in a payed for home right in the religious community that has all my childrens friends and loved ones in it. That through out the childrens lives we have not been in need of anything. The children were all healthy and happy. There was nothing ever mentioned about me being unfit or a problem in any way even by her witnesses. Testimony was brought in that I have always been with my children. I even delivered one myself. I was part time so I could be home with my children. Her witnesses had no problems testifying, but my witness were yelled at and made fun of(some on tape). He said he didn't understand a children being disciplined and that children should be free to do what they want. He said that they should have TV and internet and live "normal" lives. He constantly tried to keep "religion" out of it saying it has nothing to do with what's in the best interest in the children(yet he uses religion against me in his descision).
Several days after the trial the court recorder ran into one of my witnesses and told him that the judge is biased against your people and often isn't even mainstream in his views. He said he makes his decisions on his own biases. Several weeks after that the judges cousin who often works for the Mennonites in our area told some of them that the judge was angry that they dared to show up at his courtroom since they don't do anything for society. He also said that the judge doesn't like them.
Finally after 4 months of waiting the judge made his descision. I couldn't believe it. In fact my wife's attorney was suprised. The judge went completely beyond what even my wife was asking for. He gave her everything he possibly could. She got sole custody. He split a large non marital money gift from my parents. He gave me several things I have never owned and gave her all the farm stuff. In no way was the property divided equally. He took a seperate paragraph and told me I "need to understand" some things and called my beliefs "deplorable". He said my shedding of tears was a "sham". He said that my dad's and my testimony was "factually incorrect"(I guess I lie). And yes he did end up basing my child support payment on a job I had for four weeks. He said that he understands that I don't have a job and that I live off the land but said that I am capable of making that kind of money so he's basing it on that.
Now more bad news:
My state has no laws keeping my wife here. She is allowed to move wherever she wants to. The local judges are given much power. This is a no fault state. It is a back woods area(once the judges nephew who is a sherrif deputy served me a notice that the local family services was sueing me for child support and medical insurance. This was signed by the prosecuter who is the judge,s cousin not to be confussed with the cousin who works for the local wildlife division or the other nephew who is the dog warden or another nephew who is also a deputy.)I have appealed this but my new attorney says that he as no doubts that the judges will see that this is a bad desicsion but they don't like to over turn the local judge's descision. They want them to have the power. No attorney I've talked with doubts that the judge was biased and stepped on my constitutional rights but said that's just the way it is here. My attorney said my wife is in the driver's seat and I need to listen to her because if she goes before this judge she is likely to get whatever she wants. Both attorney's of mine say they have never seen anything like this. One of those attorneys has been working for 44 years.
I seem to have exausted all my options. Absollutely any suggestions would be welcome.