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Topics - dipper

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11
Custody Issues / GAL Question
« on: Jun 09, 2017, 07:55:04 AM »
I have tried to research the role of the GAL and it appears that it varies from state to state and even court to court.  Some courts have clearly defined rules - others don't.  My question is - can the GAL legally share your concerns with the other side?    This would allow the other side to correct issues prior to court and seems unfair to me....

12
General Issues / Attorneys
« on: Apr 05, 2017, 11:17:21 AM »
I had felt good about our last attorney initially but then beginning in January it was as if he had taken on too many cases.  Never had time to talk, seemed to blow us off.  Once court was postponed in  February due to my husband's health, we only saw him one time prior to court in March.  He really did not give us any solids as to what he would be using in court - though we pushed for it - and he said he would try to get the medical information in that the other side filed to quash.   He told us he would take at least 1/2 day to review all of our material. 


On day of court, he was extremely unprepared.  The only thing he came prepared with was what he had been harking on for months and what we had told him was not enough.  He didn't even hark on that hard enough.  During court, he kept checking his cell phone and rubbing his hands over his eyes as if he was very distraught.  Not a good sign for us.  He did not object to them bringing in material that was not relevant to the case and dated prior the last custody order.  In fact, he only objected once and quickly admitted that he did not have grounds for an objection.


Okay, we have filed an appeal as we were meeting other attorneys to get their input on the case but you have to file within 10 days.   One attorney we met, we have heard excellent stuff about - but he is super expensive and really just a grumpy old man who is mean.   What we found out when we met him made us understand a lot  - this attorney is one of the attorneys representing our last attorney.  Our last attorney was with his wife at Christmas, but they have since split and it is very ugly.   The attorney - M. E.  - told us that our then attorney had been unable to devote the time he should have as he was so deep in his own problems.  Yes - told us this!  He also informed us that our then attorney was being represented by our opponent's law firm!   The opposing side's attorney's firm was co-counsel for our attorney.  They had worked out a deal about medical reports before ever coming into court and we were never informed about it.  Nothing was used.....


We got a bill today from our then-attorney and he charged ( at least he was honest) exactly 1 hour for trial prep.   I would say it was less than that.....but one hour was hugely insufficient.  He charged us for 5 hours court time and I really think we will call him on that.  He was unprepared, was on his cell seemingly upset, and during a break went outside fussing with someone on the phone - probably the soon-to-be-ex. 


I am considering filing a complaint especially now that we have a bill that shows that he did not adequately prepare. 

13
General Issues / Cell Phone privacy
« on: Mar 22, 2017, 02:00:54 AM »
In court yesterday, the other side produced a running text between what appeared to be our oldest son (not the baby daddy) and my husband.  My husband was charged with marijuana possession 44 years ago and that is a felony.  In the text messages, oldest son was attempting to get my husband to take guns to pawn for him.   The implication was that my husband had did this and it was illegal for him to be in possession of the guns.


The text messages were confusing as they involved both my husband and the baby daddy.   There were no phone numbers on the text messages showing who they were between.  At the time I was unclear about origination and thought they had somehow got the texts off of my son (baby daddy) phone...and she had bought him that phone and it was all on her account.  However, I don't know if that gave her the right to invade his privacy....


But....we have been thinking...those conversations were clearly between my husband and oldest son.  They are even discussing our youngest son at times.  We are thinking one of the times she came over here, she was laying around inside while we were outside and went through my husbands phone.....


Isn't that illegal? 

14
Custody Issues / Please think of us!
« on: Mar 20, 2017, 01:24:21 PM »
Tomorrow is the day!!  Going home to spend time with the little one....look over everything after she is in bed tonight.  Plan on getting up in the morning....going to the park to play with her.  Then to court later.


I can feel the anxiety growing....


If you pray - pray for us - especially that our grandchild be protected.  If you don't pray- think positive for us!!! 

15
Custody Issues / Suggestions for testimony
« on: Mar 14, 2017, 08:16:19 AM »
We go to court next Tuesday and this is the first time we will actually be testifying in front of the judge.  I am extremely nervous, though our attorney feels the judge will not allow the mother any time on her own...it will be tied into the grandmother having to be present.


Any tips?  As you all know, I can be wordy and defensive - elaborating to show why I did something or why the other party is wrong.


Is it okay to elaborate or just answer exactly what is asked?


The other parties are moving this Saturday to be surrounded by other family members and I am sure rent free.   Though the mother's lawyer notified our attorney, the grandmother has not notified us of her move.   The order states 30 days in writing.   


The address provided to us, I believe is not correct.  It is for the house at the front of the road, but not the specific 911 address of where child will be when in their care.  I don't know if grandma will live with them or if she and her husband will live in another trailer on the same property.

16
Custody Issues / Motion to Quash
« on: Feb 04, 2017, 11:49:50 AM »
We go to court on February 14th.  We have subpoenada lot of medical information about the mother.  Her therapist sent a letter saying she is not a patient.  Now we are receiving letters that her attorney is filing motions to quash all of it.  This information is important to show that she is physically and mentally incapable of taking care of child.  One pharmacy will not even send it to the court, as is the law, and wants an order from the court first.  She is wanting to hide all the pain medication she has been on.  Does anyone have experience with this?

17
Custody Issues / Custody Hearing
« on: Dec 29, 2016, 10:20:58 AM »
Brief background:  parents never married; custody is shared by father/his parents and mother/her mother.  Biological parents reunited in July - asked us to take care of child.  As we feared, the mother left son again in November and now child is gone from our home excepts for visitation.  Many factors in play here - uncontrolled physical illness as well as mental illness; drug use, hostility.


The mother stated that the court order we have is fine and she doesn't want to take our time.   But, once she got our filing, she now wants full custody.  She had gave her dad my phone number before to call and fuss at me - I have never met him and had not said anything about him.   Yesterday, she gave a friend me and my husband's names to contact on facebook over a profile picture.  The mother had texted me two different times yesterday being what I considered mean..the second time to say the three year old should not be sticking her tongue out and we need to stop allowing it.  When I said we don't allow it, it just went downhill.  I finally did a screenshot of her and her friend together with their tongues hanging out and said - what you do in your house is your choice, but if you don't want child doing it, maybe you should not.   


At 1:46/1:47 last night this friend of her's sent my husband and I fb messages fussing at us and just being ugly.  Said she would bring her Sheriff uncle down here because I was committing stalking (by taking her profile picture).   I did reply to her and I did speak my mind up to a point.   Then I blocked her.


I did text the mother as I knew she was still up and told her to not be giving out my information to anyone.  She of course fussed and said it was my fault for talking about people....


This morning at 6:09 we were woke up to the friend calling from a private number.  We figured it was one of her friends since it was blocked....the person left a super hateful message calling me a fat *itch over and over....talked about my daughter....told me to back off of the mother..and said I would never get my hands on her f*ing niece.


Then she messaged my husband two more times on facebook over a 20 minute period.  He never replied....


The police say there is nothing we can do because she did not threaten physical or sexual harm...and even the mother can not get in trouble for giving out our contact information.  The attorney acts like these actions do not matter as the child was not involved.  I think it goes to character. 


We go to court on July 10th and he thinks our main thing is that child was with us for four months and did well....I think the friendships and giving our contact information out for others to call/message us is harassment and goes to her mental illness being unmanaged.


Any thoughts on it? 

18
Custody Issues / Moving Forward
« on: Nov 10, 2016, 08:01:21 AM »
It's been awhile since I posted. Quick background - father and mother of grandchild never married.  They split up when child turned one.  My husband and I are on the joint custody order with son - her mother is on order with her.  After a year and half of fighting/court and finalized order, the parents got back together.  Son's house is a pig sty and mother chose to move in with him and asked my husband and I to care for child until they could clean it up.  That was on July 23rd.   We still have child.


We consulted an attorney one month in who recommended asking them to sign off on us having primary custody since this is the role we play.  She would never do that.....son would.   My husband talked to him and he would...however, I have been reluctant to pursue anything as my  mother is very ill with cancer and my husband recently found out that in addition to cirrhosis, he has liver cancer.  He needs a transplant.  He still gets around, takes care of grandchild, etc...But, there is a lot on my plate.  My husband feels we should pursue custody for the very reason that he is ill.  We would have to stay out of state when a transplant is performed.  We need everything legally squared away for child.



The other grandmother, who is on the order, has seen child around 15 days since July.   Mother of child has spent 9 days/nights with her - all at the grandmother's house (8 in August, one in October).  My son has spent NO nights with his child since being back with the mother.  They see her on outings with us but that is it.  We do not get any financial support from any of them.


We have had child around 107 days out of like 122.   Their house is still disgusting - I am talking literal trash just thrown around, numerous trash bags in every room, plates setting around in throughout the house with food on them, and dog feces everywhere..dried on the floor, smeared on the walls.   CPS will not investigate unless child is in the home...which we never want to happen.   They suggested calling a building inspector.


Here is the issue I am battling with - should we sit down with both parents and request they relinquish full custody to us (which I believe the mother will bolt and we will be back to old order at that time) or do we go straight to the attorney and have him file for us?   


Either way I feel it will be messy.....I just don't want to have to give up child as we have been her only stability basically all of her life and in the past several months for sure.

19
Custody Issues / Seeing an Attorney
« on: Aug 12, 2016, 08:56:14 AM »
Our grandchild has been with us for a month straight now.   The parents never did get the house livable where she could move in.   The dad, our son, is on drugs - the hard stuff.   The mother has chosen to live with him knowing he is back on drugs; she may or may not know the extent of what he is taking.   She has been sick since moving in and finally was hospitalized this week. 


We will be seeing an attorney next week to discuss options.   We have joint custody, but it worries me that it is teamed with our son and he is not fit to have child.   Even with joint, we worry that if they should decide to take child on their time,  we could do nothing even though the place is filthy and all they do is lay around in bed, sleeping and watching TV.   Very toxic couple....

20
Custody Issues / Already began
« on: Jul 27, 2016, 09:54:16 AM »
What we suspected has already began.   Sunday evening son's gf asked us to watch child so she could help him clean.   A couple of hours later she called and she was moving in.  Supposedly, her mother had called her and was mad because child was with us and kicked her out.  Essentially, that kicks child out too.  Son moved her in - it was either a scam by her and her mother or son and the gf.   She is all loving with her mother....so I find it very hard to believe she was kicked out.


The gf asked for us to keep child until they could get air conditioning and clean.   We have had her since Sunday night.  We brought the gf over Monday to visit and went over there yesterday.  My father had two ac's he gave them.   


Today, she has already asked about her mother having part of our time in two weeks.   It's only been three days since she moved in and she already wants us to ignore the order for the person who kicked her and child out.   I only responded that they have child on August 12th and we have her the other two days requested.  She replied that her mother has that weekend off and wants her.   I am so disgusted.

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