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Messages - trystero

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Custody Issues / Re: Guy in North Dakota needing some help...
« on: Feb 23, 2009, 10:44:55 AM »
Suggest going to Borders or nearest book store and looking though some of the many fathers rights and child custody books.  They'll help you understand the process.  Knowledge is going to be your best resource.  What does ND law say about parents rights/times?  What do you want?

The clerk at the court can help you fill out the right forms.  You might want to check out fathershelphotline.com as well for some lower cost legal help.

You do have rights.  Don't doubt that.  You should be able to file Motions for Parenting Time, there's a downloadable form for setting up a parenting time plan.

A few things to be aware of:
- child support will factor in...
- because your daughter is so young, you'll see some bias from the courts towards it being 'best' that she spend the majority of her time with mother.  However, that will mostly impact overnight visits, you should be able to go for as much visitation time as you want (hour a day, or few hours twice a week), etc.
- It will feel like it sucks (because it does) but as your daughter gets older, you should posture yourself for 50% custody....
- Do not fall into the trap of trying to negotiate UP from some low number like 10% visitation or something.  Make them negotiate down from your entitled 50%.....save you trouble downstream..

Custody Issues / Re: Is joint custody something to consider/do?
« on: Feb 22, 2009, 11:42:14 PM »
Here are my thoughts....

- Issue 1:  You had a new child in 07.  Atleast here in Colorado, major things that effect your financial situation should warrant a revisit to the child support calculations.  Because your husband has a new dependent, that probably does/should effect the child support.  I'd guess probably not much, but if he were still married to the ex, and they had another child, less would be spent on the oldest because there are now 2 kids.......make sense.

- Issue 2:  Dang!  I thought my ex- was psycho!  Unless something is wrong elsewhere, your household sounds stable.  He should look for 50% of the holiday's.  If it wasn't in the most current or previous court orders he got shafted. 

Colorado State Forum / ex-, suicide attempt and kids.....
« on: Feb 22, 2009, 12:56:05 PM »
Hi Colorado, I've posted my direct link in the Custody forum.  As I'm also in colorado and subject to the C.R.S. I thought I'd point the group in my direction for some comment/thoughts.


At first opportunity I would either follow her from work, or have a friend follow her in a car she'd not recognize.  Then you'll atleast know where she lives.....It isn't illegal so long as your at a distance and threatening in some way (i.e. don't do it as if you're a stalker....)......

Roger that!  I think at least for the short term need some supervised visitation arranged so that she can maintain relationship with the kids but in a controlled situation.  Will take time to both ascertain her mental stability as well as to regain the trust that the kids are indeed safe with her.  Supposed to speak with her this afternoon....

Greetings board!  Just found this site and appears to be a wealth of information.  I will be searching later on my topic, but here's my situation in brief...

2 children, ages 9 and 7.
50/50 custody shared with ex.

about a week ago, all hell broke loose on the first full day of her parenting time (saturday).  Silly fight escalated to kids calling me to be picked up.  While we were on route, ex- took a bottle of prescription meds while telling kids she didn't want to see them again and would tell the judge that she was bad Mom, etc.

She went to ER and then to psych hospital for 72 hours.

What do you think?  We think we need to mod parenting time order but having been down this road many times, advice/encouragement is welcomed!


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