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Messages - kaylene99

#21
Soc, what if both parents agree, without any court involvement, to terminate CS for the child who will reach the age of majority based on GA law, will this agreement be honored by the court?  

The GA support office shows NCP in arrears because NCP made payments directly to CP when CP was moving and couldn't provide account # necessary to set up auto CS payment via GA support office (as stated on CS order).  Around that time, NCP had to go on sea deployment and was effectively unable to follow up on this account setup matter.  NCP has copies of all checks sent to CP with notation "for child support".  CP cashed all checks.  The GA support office has copies of cashed checks and added notes regarding these payments to NCP's support record. In reality, NCP overpaid CS to CP.

Questions for you:

1.) If NCP choose to register the CS order in FL and modify it to terminate support for the child reaching age of majority, what will become of these "arrears"?  

2.) Will NCP be ordered to pay these back even though there are clear evidences that CP was paid CS due on a monthly basis?

3.) What if CP doesn't dispute the fact that NCP is current with CS -- does that have any bearing in NCP's favor?  Does NCP need to get in writing that CP does not dispute the fact that NCP is current with all CS payments?

4.) What would you recommend is the best approach (least $$$, stress and headache involved) for NCP to correct "arrears" from GA support office when NCP's residence is in FL along with the minor kids?





#22
Dear Socrateaser / RE: Another question
Oct 24, 2005, 06:57:18 PM
will post below
#23
Dear Socrateaser / Another question
Oct 23, 2005, 05:19:28 PM
Soc, no state collection unit is involved so I didn't think there would be routine modification schedule.

CS is currently done through an allotment from NCP's paycheck.  There are 2 kids involved.  If one turns 18 or graduates from high school (whichever comes first), NCP would like to modify the allotment to remove support for that child.  Does the court need to be involved with this?  Can this be done legally without spending $$$ on lawyers, etc?
Will a simple notification to CP citing the CS order and the change NCP is intending to make suffice?
#24
Dear Socrateaser / Child support question
Oct 23, 2005, 08:45:50 AM
Soc,
If the NCP's salary increased, does this mean the CS should automatically be re-calculated for an increase even though CP's not asking for it?  If CP eventually asks for it, will there be retroactive payments involved?  Original CS order done in GA but all parties are in FL now.  CS order has not be registered in FL.

Thanks for your advice.
#25
Dear Socrateaser / Child support question
Oct 23, 2005, 08:45:50 AM
Soc,
If the NCP's salary increased, does this mean the CS should automatically be re-calculated for an increase even though CP's not asking for it?  If CP eventually asks for it, will there be retroactive payments involved?  Original CS order done in GA but all parties are in FL now.  CS order has not be registered in FL.

Thanks for your advice.
#26
Dear Socrateaser / Sorry -- here's 2nd try
May 17, 2005, 12:16:38 PM
Hi soc,

Need your help and advice on this one.

Husband and ex-wife were ordered in 2001 to attend a mediation which they both did. Basically, the arrangement agreed upon by both parties in that mediation is for husband to have the kids 2 weekends a month (this is in addition to holidays he should have with the kids as outlined in their divorce order). He will arrange for their roundtrip flight one weekend and, for the other weekend, he will pick the kids up from their residence and ex-wife is to pick them up from our residence with husband giving her $35 for her car rental fee. She made a sobbing story of how she drives an old, unreliable car which will not make it to our residence (what a lie!). Anyway, we agreed to the $35 which is really a small fee in exchange for more time with the kids.

Husband tried to fully abide by this mediation order in the past with the ex-wife not doing her end of the deal past a couple of times. Every weekend that husband proposed that they "share" the travel per mediation order, ex-wife countered with it not being a good weekend, her husband is working and she doesn't want to drive alone, blah, blah, blah! Since we can't afford the kids' roundtrip flight two weekends a month, we resorted to what we could afford which was one weekend a month.

Due to recent events involving kids' poor school grades and stepson's disrespectful attitude and behavior towards husband (which really is just his way of asking for more time spent with Dad), we realized that it was a mistake not holding ex-wife down to the visitation and mediation orders that give us more time with the kids.

Questions are:

1.  How can husband effectively encourage ex-wife to abide by the mediation order? This is almost a funny question to ask since we know she will just make all kinds of excuses and effectively resist.

2.  Mediation order was done in County A but we live in County B and ex-wife lives in County C.  Which county should we file contempt of court in? Could we register mediation order from County A to County C?

3.  How many denials or frustration of visitation can ex-wife do to get a strong case against her in court?  We don't want court to think of our case as "petty".

4.  Could you help us with the wording or phrasing as far as encouraging the ex-wife to abide by the mediation order? We want to be direct-to-the-point without sounding threatening.

Thank you, soc!
#27
Dear Socrateaser / What to do?
May 17, 2005, 10:03:09 AM
Hi soc,

Need your help and advice on this one.

Husband and ex-wife were ordered in 2001 to attend a mediation which they both did.  Basically, the arrangement agreed upon by both parties in that mediation is for husband to have the kids 2 weekends a month (this is in addition to holidays he should have with the kids as outlined in their divorce order).  He will arrange for their roundtrip flight one weekend and, for the other weekend, he will pick the kids up from their residence and ex-wife is to pick them up from our residence with husband giving her $35 for her car rental fee.  She made a sobbing story of how she drives an old, unreliable car which will not make it to our residence (what a lie!).  Anyway, we agreed to the $35 which is really a small fee in exchange for more time with the kids.

Husband tried to fully abide by this mediation order in the past with the ex-wife not doing her end of the deal past a couple of times.  Every weekend that husband proposed that they "share" the travel per mediation order, ex-wife countered with it not being a good weekend,  her husband is working and she doesn't want to drive alone, blah, blah, blah!  Since we can't afford the kids' roundtrip flight two weekends a month, we resorted to what we could afford which was one weekend a month.  

Due to recent events involving kids' poor school grades and stepson's disrespectful attitude and behavior towards husband (which really is just his way of asking for more time spent with Dad), we realized that it was a mistake not holding ex-wife down to the visitation and mediation orders that give us more time with the kids.

How can husband effectively encourage ex-wife to abide by the mediation order?  This is almost a funny question to ask since we know she will just make all kinds of excuses and effectively resist.  Another question is this:  the mediation order was done in County A but we live in County B and ex-wife lives in County C.  Which county should we file contempt of court in?  Could we register mediation order from County A to County C?

Last but certainly not the least, could you help us with the wording or phrasing as far as encouraging the ex-wife to abide by the mediation order?  We want to be direct-to-the-point without sounding threatening.

Thank you, soc!
#28
Dear Socrateaser / What to do..... what to do.
Feb 04, 2005, 02:47:42 PM
Hi soc,
Hope all is great on your end.  It's been a while but here I go again with some questions I hope you can help me with.

You may remember our situation: Hubby's ex-wife married a European guy.  They tried to relocate kids outside of the country.  We fought and judge ruled ex-wife can't take kids out of the country.  Went back to court a couple of times since then because ex-wife wants to "vacation" with the kids outside of the country.  Hubby practically offered for her to travel with one kid while the other stays with us.  She took her chance to court where hubby told judge of the same offer.  Judge agreed and ex-wife was able to travel with each kid on 2 separate occasions.  Currently, we have one kid's passport while she has the other's.

Fast forward to now.  Ex-wife informed hubby that kids' passports are up for renewal this year and she would like to know his plans for that (haha-- like we are planning to leave the country any time soon).   She quickly added that she would like to take BOTH kids to a few family vacations and we are, of course, assuming she meant OUTSIDE OF THE COUNTRY.

The thing is, this woman moved the kids numerous times away from us.  They currently live about 6 hours away and, regardless of how many times husband asked and practically begged for her to consider meeting halfway to facilitate more contact with the kids, she always refuse or ignore the situation.   Going back to court to modify order will only costs so much $$$ and we were hoping to work this out outside of court but, so far, we are out of luck......Hubby continues to shoulder 100% of transportation and we are making the best of what we can afford and do in that regard.

Hubby and I haven't fully discussed this latest update.  I think he is inclined to show good faith by allowing both kids to travel with ex-wife outside of the country but I think that's still a very dangerous ground.  For the sake of the kids, we do want a peaceful relationship with the ex-wife but I don't think that means giving in to her every demand.  I am instantly thinking of having them post a bond but I doubt that they have the $$$.  In lieu of that, is there anything else we can do to protect our relationship with the kids?  Can we even go as far as having her sign an agreement that she will return both of the kids at a specified date or child support is automatically terminated and custody is automatically reversed.  The biggest concern here is enforceability in the country she's going to.  I seriously doubt that these agreements will mean anything if they are not going to be recognized and enforced by the other country.

So, soc, what can you advise us to do at this point?  Ex-wife said she wants to open up the lines of communication regarding her request.  Funny how she's so willing to talk when she wants something and always manages to ignore/avoid the "meeting halfway" discussion but we will certainly bring that to the table again.

Thanks and looking forward to your wise advice as always.




#29
Hi soc,

It's me again so I hope you don't mind. :)

In order to transfer or register a case (child support, visitation, divorce) from one state to another, does the petitioner need to appear in person at the original court?  Or, is this easily handled by his or her lawyer?
How is this transfer/registration usually done and will the other party be informed or given a chance to oppose or question such transfer?

Also, as far as jurisdiction goes, if all parties are now living in the new state, doesn't that mean that the old state has to relinquish jurisdiction?
By the way, hubby still works in the old state so does that mean the old state's guidelines still apply when it comes to child support modifications?   The cost of living in the new state is definitely higher than the old state.

Thank you as always!
#30
Dear Socrateaser / Staying home alone
Jul 13, 2004, 10:53:45 AM
Hi soc,

We currently have my stepkids for part of the summer.  Recently, in their quest for us to let them stay home alone rather than go to the caretaker we've arranged for them while we go to work, they both stated that they have been staying home alone after school.  The kids are 11 and 9 years old respectively.  I believe the elementary schools in their county end their day around 2 pm.  Their mother doesn't come home from work till 5:30 pm or so, so that leaves the kids home alone for 2-3 hours.

Ex-wife has not discussed this at all with my husband and impressed upon the kids that she doesn't like a lot of people knowing about this (hmm, I wonder why).  My husband had since brought up the issue with her and stated that, although he's a bit liberal on the topic, this is really something that she needs to discuss with him.  Of course, she denies that the kids are left home alone on a daily basis and that she's only left them once for an hour or so.

Anyway, I, on the other hand, am against leaving them home alone on a daily basis for any significant period of time (1 hour or more) at their current age.  I feel that having them attend an after-school care would be much better for them.  They used to attend an after-school program before so why change?  They are great kids but they do fight with each other physically so they still need adult supervision.

What are your thoughts on this?  We're not looking to take the mother back to court but I would like this legally documented somehow.   BTW, we are all in Florida.

Thanks as always for your insights/advice.