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It is so clear that you no nothing .. absolutely nothing.  What on earth was the left-behind parent suppose to file. 

What made-up defining moment or event do you have , other than your illogical general statements to indicate father approval of the move or secure jurisdiction over the father or any such fact....not conjecture.  You just don't make a lick of sense and what you say  is NOT the way it works.

So I know nothing?  Because you say so?  Sorry, after reading several of your posts, it is clear that your attempted insult fell far short.   And it is equally clear that you really don't know much about what you are talking about.

It's called a RESTRAINING ORDER.  What would be in the restraining order, you might wonder?  Well, what it would say is that the mother has to bring the children back to the original state and that she would be prevented from moving the children out of state again while the matter of custody and parenting time is settled.   

Of course, too much time has passed for the father to be able to do this.  It's called implied consent.  That is how a judge MAY view his inaction.  And when it comes to light that he actually moved there to try to work things out, it's going to be more than implied consent.  It's going to be implicit consent.

Momofftoo makes these invalid insertions to turn the thread to accept the mother superior - possession is 99.9% bogus rule of law -  father relocates and MAYBE gets a visitation deal - sick mentality.   

What an utterly assinine statement. 

He didn't file right away to show the courts that he wasn't okay with the move, this could lead a court to state that he accepted the move by his inaction (and this has happened before when one of the parents move away).  In fact, he moved out there.  And if he had anything sent there with his name on it, that is going to help the mother's case even more.  And may very well put jurisdiction in NJ. 

Sick mentality?  Wow,  you really do have issues, don't you?  I suggest that you work on them.  Now off to find out if there is a filter feature. 

Good Point Ocean...Right now, my lawyer is digging up dirt on her.  I don't know if that is the right path or not....Opinions?

No dirt you dig up is going to overcome the dirt she has on you. 

Child abandonment is pretty serious.   You aren't getting custody.  And if your attorney is telling you differently, then I don't think you told your attorney everything. 

BTW, just what do you think digging up dirt on your kids' mother and trying to tear them away from her is going to do to your kids?  It certainly isn't going to show them that you love them.  All you would be doing is showing them what a petty and vindictive person you are. 

And you have no right to be petty and vindictive considering that you VOLUNTARILY ABANDONED your children for 5 years. 

Again, your money would be better spent paying off your child support arrears, paying for counseling to help your children deal with what you did to them than fighting a losing battle.

Since it has been months since she moved to NJ and you didn't file to have her bring the kids back at the time she moved, fighting the relocation is probably not going to be successful.   

And the every other week-end schedule isn't going to work, either.  And neither is the week on week off, especially with their ages and the distance.  And the long-distance parenting plan stinks for that age group, too.   

If it is possible, moving closer to them will allow you to be more involved in their lives.   And if you do move, be sure to include a move away clause in any parenting plan that the two of you agree.  You don't want to go through this again.   

We are on the West Coast and the planned move is to the East Coast...No way I can move.  With his job, it is a solid that the move is set.  I don't doubt that he has to move....

If this goes to court, the judge is going to look at the whole situation.  Including which parent has always been there for the kids.

And that wasn't you for 5 years. 

They are also going to look at who has been supporting the children financially.

And that wasn't you for 5 years. 

You aren't going to be able to stop the children from moving.   Your actions in the past pretty much saw to that.  And since you ony recently came back into their lives, you really don't have a track record of being there for your kids.   Whereas, the mother and stepfather do. 

You have a 4 1/2 year old child.  I will assume the mother is working, if she isn't, you need to see if income was imputed to her.   If not, you may have a case for reduction. 

Your portion of childcare is an add-on to child support.  And is rather expensive.  If the mother is the one providing the health insurance, your portion of the child's part of the premium is an add-on to child support.

Now lets address how the courts come up with your net income.  They take the gross amount and determine what your tax deductions would be based on a tax table that they have from the IRS.  Any other deductions aren't allowed unless they are mandatory.  A 401K typically isn't mandatory, nor is health insurance so if you are contributing to those, they don't count.  And if you have a higher amount of taxes coming out than what the IRS says your tax obligation would be for the year based on what you make, then that isn't to be deducted from your income to arrive at your net.  Too many NCP's played around with the taxes they had taken out to lower their child support.  So now the courts determine it for them.

Then there's also the fact that you are a long-distance parent, which means that you really don't have a lot of overnights.  NJ gives parenting time credit for overnights only.   You can make sure that they used the correct number of overnights.

ETA:  I found online calculators to inaccurate, you are probably better off consulting with a NJ attorney.  They typically have the same program that the courts use to determine child support. 

It appears the father has a choice here, stay and continue the equal access with the child or move and become the long-distance parent.  Why should the parent who isn't moving be the long-distance parent? 

Before the father moves away, a judge probably won't let him take the child with him, he needs to get a long-distance parenting plan in place.  He will probably get most of the school breaks, the major holidays will still be split and he will probably get most of the summer, but not all.  The other parent has a right to a summer vacation with her child.

Even if this was for work, he still would not be able to move the child away from the other parent.  Just like the other parent would not be able to move the child away from him. 

I would like to get 50/50 custody, don't know if I have a chance though.  I understand for 5 years I haven't been involved with school, doctors, etc, etc.  Plus I owe 17,000$ in child support.  Don't know if I could get that with my past?

Let's see if I got this straight:  You abandoned your children physically for 5 years, didn't pay your child support and you now want 50/50 physical custody? 

That isn't happening.  You chose not to be a parent for 5 years.  You chose not to pay your child support.  That will have a major impact with a judge.  And while it is good that you changed your mind and are now being an active part of the children's lives, that doesn't change the fact that you abandoned them. 

Rather than spending money on an attorney, you should spend the money paying off the child support arrears and counseling for the kids so that they can deal with what you did to them.   If you handle this right, you might be able to mend the damage you did to your relationship with your kids.  And trying to force 50/50 physical on children who aren't handling the current schedule well (their drop in grades is proof of that) is NOT handling it right.   

Just wanted to introduce myself and there isn't a board for that purpose, so I chose this one.  I don't want to get into too much detail for obvious reasons, but I have been divorced for almost 3 years (we split a year before the divorce was final) and have 2 young children.  I am the primary parent when it comes to my kids.   I live in the state of NJ.