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Topics - oneaddress

#1
Custody Issues / Help
Mar 04, 2011, 08:34:55 AM
Our child is allergic to dogs and cats and some foods. Doctor has written letter to school and to us about his allergies. It will be written into final court order. We are still in court. Had asthma attack last week. Now BM is giving him a dog for his birthday. She is telling child and her friends. Child loves dogs. This is just another wedge issue that BM calculates that will make child want to spend more time at her home. BM tells child that there are no allergies. How should I handle the situation? Thanks
#2
Just hoping that 2010 brings joy, peace, and happiness to each of you and your loved ones. For some of us, 2009 has been a rough and sometimes heartbreaking year, but we will be continue to be strong for our families because our love makes a difference in their lives. Thanks to all who have reached out to help me and others this year.
Agape
#3
Custody Issues / Dr. called me
Dec 20, 2009, 04:14:36 PM
Asthmatic child's Dr. called me last week and said that his allergies were severe. No smoking or pets. Dr. also called mom with test results.  Today he came home reaking of smoke. What should I do to prove that he is always returned in this condition? I know that smoke smells evaporate. He also said that he was given allergy meds. She did not tell me. I will text her to find out what he has taken, because I do not want an overdose. How do I preserve the evidence or can I.
#4
General Issues / Stress
Dec 18, 2009, 05:50:45 AM
I would like to know how some parents deal with the constant stress and strain of court issues. I know that my journey has been very short compared to others.
#5
Custody Issues / What should I expect?
Nov 05, 2009, 02:11:53 PM
I have temporary primary custody of our son. Final court date is early 2010. Today, my attorney called today to say BM demands depositions from family members and me. I admit that I am feeling very anxious. Is it for me to spend more money? How should I prepare and what does she expect to come from the depositions? Thank you
#6
Father's Issues / Pain for my son
Oct 23, 2009, 08:06:39 AM
I am feeling pain for my son this morning. I am primary and my son is 5. He has three pairs of shoes that I bought him - 1 pair of Stride Rite, 1 pair of Reeboks, and 1 pair of Nikes. He wears his Reeboks to preschool. BM has never bought him shoes. That may seem strange, but it is true. BM says that it is the father's responsibility.

Son was adamant that he would not wear school shoes this morning. Why? BM told him that she hated him in those shoes when he saw her during visitation. He reasoned that she did not like him because he wore shoes that she hated. He had been talking about this for the past week, but I did not know how much it bothered him. He smiled as he wore his new shoes out into the rain today. How can she not see that negativity and anger is cruel and hurtful to our son. BM tells me all the time that what the mother wants is the only thing that matters.

No it is not! It is about what son needs to grow up safe and secure. Son tells me that BM says bad words to him all the time. I try to explain that she loves him. I have tried to get her to stop the bad talk (in person and in the court), but it just gets worse. BM's goal is to turn him against me, because she has told him that she only happy when he comes home to her. I just gets so frustrating to see him being damaged more and more. I can take damage, but he should not have to take damage.

I have contacted child therapists. Four have said that they do not take my insurance (after I explain the situation). Maybe they do not want to be involved with potential court case. I am waiting for two callbacks. I will continue until he gets therapy, but I wonder how much it will help when there is so much hate coming at son from BM. Thanks for letting me vent.
#7
Custody Issues / What should I do?
Oct 11, 2009, 06:42:05 PM
I have posted before about my five year old son. I am a never married father. BM and I have shared custody since son was 6 months old. BM gave her time to her mother and moved away without son. I stepped in when grandmother was too stressed to cover for BM. BM told me that mothers always rule no matter what. BM felt free to marry and to separate, to live with a guy, to booze and to drug as much as she wanted. I have tried to be a stable parent to my son.

After going to court, I became temporary residential parent. BM came back to ask for sole custody. I think it has something to do with child support. I told my attorney to not ask judge for support. I know that he needs two loving parents. When BM's mom told me to file for sole custody, I said no because I wanted BM to be a coparent.

Now, BM's mom has suddenly on board with BM getting custody. My young son is being so hostile with me after he comes from a visit with BM. He cried when he came home, he tried to punch me, and he tried to bite me. It is so discouraging, because I have never spanked him and have devoted myself to making him content and happy. I have always told my son that BM loves him even when he says that she is mean to him. Should I get my son a therapist or GAL? I am feeling a little down right now.
#8
Custody Issues / Need Advise
Oct 05, 2009, 10:36:00 AM
Hello group,

I am temporary primary residential parent of my five yr old son. BM used drugs and abused alcohol DUI. Final hearing three months away. I did not ask for mom to pay any child support. BM taking prescribed "nerve" medicines. History of violent behavior. BM admitted that she smokes weed and had done cocaine, but she did pass 48 hr. notice drug test.

BM went to my girlfriend's job to confront her because she did not like girlfriend's attitude. BM took our five year old son with her. BM has been married and is in new relationship. Girlfriend diffused situation by telling her to stop arguing in front of child. BM called to argue with me, but I calmed her down by telling her that my girlfriend would never try to replace her as our son's mother.

BM and her family are trying to do everything they can to get custody changed. They are telling my son that I lied to get him. My son has been in my home over 50 percent since he was 6 months old. I expect more irratic behavior. I have to look over my shoulder everyday for drama. What should I do? I am trying to be a good dad to our son.

Thanks