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[A life lesson has been learned & now she will back up & regroup. I got a call Monday of last week, from DGD bawling & saying that she had a fight with the guy who convinced her to move back to TX & she wants to come home. She had lots of job apps in place but there is no work. She moved back to a small town with maybe 35 small businesses & a grocery store & about 150 kids that graduated a month before she got there.]

A life lesson has been learned & now she will back up & regroup. I got a call Monday of last week, from DGD bawling & saying that she had a fight with the guy who convinced her to move back to TX & she wants to come home. She had lots of job apps in place but there is no work. She moved back to a small town with maybe 35 small businesses & a grocery store & about 150 kids that graduated a month before she got there.
The PBFH wants nothing to do with her because she won't come help her with the new baby. Of course she lives about 15 miles away & PBFH threw her out the last time she was there & also won't send her boyfriend to pick her up. I talked to gr8dad & decided DF & I would go Tuesday to get her. Late Monday, she calls & says McDonalds called her & she has an interview on Wednesday. She will be staying.
After the interview, she calls & says she has the job as soon as she takes a 3 hour course & gets a county food handlers card. I call the health dept & find that the course is held on Thursdays & costs $20. I bank in that town so I call & get them to give her $25 so she can take the test & pay someone $5 for gas to take her. She calls back about 3:00 & says the guy has ditched her & she wants to come home. He is threatening her. I put the police on alert & learn that they are very familiar with him. He has a long criminal history & a reputation for abusing women. I called some friends & they went & picked her & her stuff up & took her to their home for the night. We left 4:30 AM, Thursday, drove 12 hours & got her. Left Friday morning & drove 12 hours back home. It has taken us a week to recover. LOL I am 2 dang old for this stuff. She is settled back in with her dad & brothers & glad to be home. She is looking for a job & planning to start college.
As we were leaving town, DF asked her if she wanted to stop by & say good-bye to her mother. She didn't say no, she said, "Hell No!" Hopefully, she has finally figured out the PBFH. Does the drama never end?

The kids are 19, 18, & 13. The 2 oldest just graduated HS. They know what she is & she keeps showing herself. I think the worst thing he ever said about her was about 2 years ago when she kidnapped the 18 yr old. He was 16 at the time. She told him if he came with her, she would let him quit school, get his drivers license & buy him a truck, so he went with her. We were frantic. We called her & she swore she hadn't heard from him, We found out she had him all along. He was devistated when he found out it was all a lie. He wound up in a mental health hospital. He later admitted that he didn't really believe her but said that he couldn't take the chance that this time would be different.

The 2 oldest asked gr8dad why she did the things she did & he told them, "In the grand scheme of things, you got a really shitty mother. She is what she is & you should just take what she gives, knowing that it can change at any moment." We have tried to shield the younger one as much as possible but he is starting to ask more questions.He does know that his mother is supposed to pay CS but doesn't but spouts her excuses whenever he feels the need to defend her. He is having some real issues with the new baby. He realizes he is no longer the "baby"  However, we told him he now has a title he never thought he would have. He is now a big brother. He thought that was cool.

I guess the best example of gr8dad's efforts to keep the children first is that about 4 years ago, her father was dying of cancer & he took her & the 3 kids to see him, over 300 miles away, using his vacation time. He did it because he felt it was important for the kids to see their grandfather one more time & he knew she had no way to get there. Her father died 2 weeks later.  Did she appreciate it? Hell no!

So, life goes on & every once in a while she does something that makes us feel that maybe Karma is catching up with her. If that makes us bad people for enjoying seeing her being held accountable for her crap, then I guess we are bad people. But the kids are doing as good as they can & we know it is only because of us!

Just thought I'd mention that she has already started working on the little guy, telling him that he shouldn't worry about school. It isn't important & it is only 3 years till he can drop out or fail out. What a great way to help him prepare for HS next year. Oh yeah, also she is still telling the 2 older kids that their dad had her arrested & it is all his fault that she had to go to jail. So far, we have been able to shield the lo from this but know sooner or later, she will tell him & give him more crap to deal with. Of course, he will believe her cuz, she is his mom & never does anything wrong. Dad must have done something cuz mom wouldn't tell him that if it wasn't true.

You see, this is the double edge sword that you must handle when you don't trash the pos. She gets to trash gr8dad but he just gets to "smile & wave." We must cling to the promise of better times when they grow up & realize that greatdad & grandma really were there for them in all ways & their pos mother was a b!%ch & a liar who hated their dad & never really loved them.

Thanks Kitty & Ocean. Some people cannot even begin to imagine what some parents have to go through. txmom, I pray your parenting issues are trival by comparison. Here is a brief list of some of the crap we have dealt with over the past 11 years or so. gr8dad left the kids with her so their life would be disrupted as little as possible. She promptly shut off all contact with them. He would drive by in hopes of seeing them in the yard. If he did & stopped to speak to them, she would come out & tell them "Say good-bye to your daddy cuz you will never see him again." They were 9, 8, & 3 at the time.
She abused them so bad that the school got CPS involved & my son got custody of the 2 boys. He is not the biological father of the girl but gave her his name & is her daddy. The pos fought to keep her by telling the court that he had no claim to her because he wasn't her father but wouldn't name the father. After she beat her sweet little face black & blue, the court declared him the presumed father & he got sole custody of all 3. She was limited to 3 hours a week which she did not show up for, most of the time. She was always telling the kids lies & getting their hopes up. Then telling them that they were a bunch of liars cuz she never told them that.

Eventually, gr8dad met someone new. The pos proceeded to tell DGD that if she would break them up, pos would get back together with him & they would be a family again. DGD became a little hellion & when she told her mother that she needed some more ideas cuz she had tried but it wasn't working but she really wanted them back together, the pos acted bewildered & said she didn't know why she was saying such things. Next she told DGD that if she was real bad at home & in school & failed, her daddy wouldn't want her any more & would send DGD back to her. (remember that kids always gravitate to the abuser) This resulted in her failing 6th grade & going to summer school. When summer school was more than half over, she asked the pos when daddy was gonna send her to live with her, & as usual, was told that she was making it all up. She finally told us why she had been behaving so badly & gr8dad told her that there was nothing that she could do that would make him want to send her away. She was devastated & the next day  she made her first of 4 suicide attempts. She had to repeat 6th grade because she was hospitalized & didn't complete summer school. She was 11 years old.

DGS#1 mainly got emotional abuse. She totally ignored him cuz he looked just like his father & she couldn't stand to look at him or talk to him. On the rare occasion that she took her visitation, she would drop him at her mother's & then take the other 2 out to Chucky Cheese or someplace like that. By the time DGS#2 was ready to start Pre-K, most of his teeth had rotted out of his mouth because she had smoked meth while she was pregnant with him.

She constantly tried to talk the older 2 out of finishing school, telling them it isn't important. Most recently, she talked DGD out of taking a full scholarship to college. This is only a tiny amount of the pain & abuse that she has heaped on us, over the years. Not to mention the time she tried to kill the 5 of us in front of the police & swore she would succeede. She got a DV ticket for that. So, it is very hard to have empathy & human compassion for a person who has devoted her life to hurting your child & his children. I feel sorry for the baby but only because she has the pos for a mother & has no idea what kind of a life she has ahead of her.

By the way, her child support is still figured at 2002 minimun wage. She is supposed to pay $200 a month for 3 children.

She lost her drivers license about 8 years ago. She doesn't care. She drives with no license or ins. She doesn't pay taxes cuz she refuses to work. I feel quite sure that the only reason she had the baby was to get welfare. She doesn't feel she should have to pay CS. As a matter of fact, the day my son got custody, she stood up and announced that, "I will never pay one fxxxxxg cent of child support." In the past 10 years or so, she has only payed a very small amount. The most she paid was right after she was made to do 30 days for failure to pay. She did it on weekends. Then she filed contempt against gr8dad for failure to give her visitation while she was in jail.
So, tell me, mixedBag,  if you are against jail time what do you think should be done with a person like this? The dad should just suck it up & skrimp & try to make ends meet, & do with out so she doesn't have to pay. Sorry that dpoesn't work for me.

[The PBFH spent a whole 14 hours in jail. A judge dismissed the warrant "Because she just had a baby". One clerk, when asked why it was dismissed said, "Well, maybe if she hadn't had a c-section..." To which gr8dad responded, "Maybe if she didn't have another kid."]

The PBFH spent a whole 14 hours in jail. A judge dismissed the warrant "Because she just had a baby". One clerk, when asked why it was dismissed said, "Well, maybe if she hadn't had a c-section..." To which gr8dad responded, "Maybe if she didn't have another kid."
It has been reset for Sept. 15, at which time she will be offered a free lawyer & then it will take about 3 months for a new court date. Then she might get jail time but the baby will be about 4 months old & she is nursing so they won't do anything. Well, it felt good while it lasted. I guess this is another method to avoid paying CS. Just go have another kid. Oh well, I guess this is just another example of justice for fathers in the good old USA.

[I know they are watching him cuz he is a tweeker. He has grown kids so he might give the baby to one of them. The next biggest laugh is that her mother came in from AR & he is stuck with her & a screaming baby. She is an evil witch & he deserves the privledge of having to put up with her. LOL Can't wait to hear the next episode of this. LOL]

I know they are watching him cuz he is a tweeker. He has grown kids so he might give the baby to one of them. The next biggest laugh is that her mother came in from AR & he is stuck with her & a screaming baby. She is an evil witch & he deserves the privledge of having to put up with her. LOL Can't wait to hear the next episode of this. LOL
Ten years is a long time to wait for it but what goes around, really does come around. Come do the happy dance with me.
Gr8dad put it best. "My ex wife had a baby so I guess that makes me a.......Hmmmmm........Lucky guy." LOL

[PBFH had a little girl night before last. Poor kid. Today as she checked out & was wheeled out of the hospital, the police were waiting. They took the baby from her arms & gave her to the father & slapped cuffs on her! Yippee. She had an outstanding warrant for failure to pay CS. Her bond is the entire amount she is delinquent & the interest. gr8dad will get it all. It is about $5,000. Her boyfriend immediately called DGD & told her that her dad called the police & had her mother arrested. What a crock. She probably signed up for welfare & they ran her & found it. The bf call gr8dad screaming that it was all his fault & he was stuck with a screaming baby while breakfast lunch & dinner for the baby is in jail.]

PBFH had a little girl night before last. Poor kid. Today as she checked out & was wheeled out of the hospital, the police were waiting. They took the baby from her arms & gave her to the father & slapped cuffs on her! Yippee. She had an outstanding warrant for failure to pay CS. Her bond is the entire amount she is delinquent & the interest. gr8dad will get it all. It is about $5,000. Her boyfriend immediately called DGD & told her that her dad called the police & had her mother arrested. What a crock. She probably signed up for welfare & they ran her & found it. The bf call gr8dad screaming that it was all his fault & he was stuck with a screaming baby while breakfast lunch & dinner for the baby is in jail.
Really made my day. Yeah, I do like this thing called Karma!

[No, the PI only located & served him. Tom wasn't able to go to court. He is trying to save the money to keep paying the lawyer.]

No, the PI only located & served him. Tom wasn't able to go to court. He is trying to save the money to keep paying the lawyer.