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Yes I was working at the time of divorce and my income was included.  I only went by what ever the formula said and didn't ask for any more.  I am fine with the child care being gone and not arguing with that.  The child care was figured at two days a week at the time of the divorce.  I was paying well over that for years and never asked for additional help in any way.  We do both have lawyers at this point and I also have no problem with income being imputed and considering that there would also be some childcare involved.  His income has also increased quite a bit and I know he is not paying a lot for his other child.  I did not mean that we are in a great place financially but the jobs I have found are not near what I had been making when I got laid off and it was worth it to us to be a little tight for a while and cut some expenses to be able to have more time at home with my son especially over the summer and be involved with his school which I feel very thankful for.

I understand.....needed the information because it would help in my coming up with an opinion.  (Not that I would be right but it does help)

From the outside looking in your Ex is making a mistake and he should have just left well enough alone.  Since you were working at the time of the divorce and therefore your income has been included in the calculation of child support I am trying to understand the basis for his argument.  I could see if you were the one asking for an increase for child support and his stance was based on a counter argument.

Remi,
The best thing you can do is maintain your parenting and love your child.  Children are very intelligent and pick up on things really fast.  In the end your ex will have to deal with the issues he is creating.  Here are some things that you can try that work for me.  Also, concerning the abuse allegations.....keep a record of all the false allegations.  If it is just he said/she said then ignore it.  If an official investigation was launched keep that report. A false allegation can and will hurt him in court.

1. Maintain very low contact with your ex.  If it does not have anything to do directly wiht the welfare of your child then completely ignore it and him.

2. You sill have to be a parent. You may find that your ex will want to become the "popular" parent and try to make you out the be the bad guy.  It may seem to work when they are really young but in the end it will bite them in the rear.  Do not change how you parent your child. Do not get into a competition with your ex. as to who is the better parent.  There should never be a distinction like that. The child needs both parents but in the early stages someone has to be the bigger person.

3. Document, Document, Document - It is important that you document everything regardless of how trivial you may think it seems. You may just need it later.

4. No direct communication.  Communicate via email or text only. This way you will have documented proof of every thing said.  I have learned this also stops false allegations as well becasue it is known you are documenting everything.

Venting is good and it works for all of us.  So feel free to vent here anytime.

If you are looking to limit attempt to take away some of his visitation that will not happen.  The courts will basically say you are making a big deal of nothing.  Now I do not agree with them on that but it seems to be the stance that is being taken.

If there is GAL involved I guess you can have it included a clause can be put in where neither parent are allowe to discuss matters of the divorce or custody in the presence of the child.  It is a very hard thing to enforce I believe but you cna have it in there and when they continually occur you can keep dragging the NCP to court for contempt.

From the outside looking in it seems that there may be a bitter dispute going on but it will not be enough to modify visitation.

It is recommended that you that you get an attorney.  Since you are a student with limited income you should qualifiy for legal aid.

1.  Once Paternity is established you can file a motion for visitation.  At a minimum you will receive standard visitation which is 1st, 3rd, and 5th weekends.  Since you are more than 100 miles apart you will get spring break every year and you will alternate holidays.  Visitation is automatic can cannot be taken from you without extenuating circumstances...such as family violence.   There should be standard forms that you can fill out for visitation but I am not sure.  It all depends on where the motions are filed and each courts rules are different.

2. Joint custody is normally the standard in Texas. Keep in mind that does not mean you get 50/50 time with your son. That means you have as much right as a parent as his mother does as it pertains to decisions in rasing your son. .  Custody is a different thing all together and since you are already far apart I don't see a judge altering that.

3 . Once paternity is established child support will be ordered if a motion is filed.  If a motion for child support is filed you need to also file a motion for visitation.

I think it is very important you get an attorney.  Try this website to start with there is a lot of information here that should be helpful. http://www.texaslawhelp.org/TX/index.cfm (http://www.texaslawhelp.org/TX/index.cfm)

Thanks Gam for the information.  I knew eventually someone with first hand knowledge would reply.

Annette It seems that you may have your salary imputed but I have a question.

Were you working at the time of your divorce?  If so I think your ex may have a hard time getting support lowered because it was already based on you having a salary.  However, I could seen him having the day expenses dropped.  If you are not working that means your child does not need day care which would eliminate his need to pay for day care.

Shucky,
CPS likes to drag their feet in Texas but I can assure you that family courts do not when it comes to the welfare of the child.  Texas is one of the most father friendly states there is when it comes to fathers.  After reading some of the horror stories from other states it seems Texas got it right at least a little.

The first thing I think you should do is file a motion for modification.  The CPS investigation may be enough for a change of circumstance and that will get your motion before court.  Once you are before a judge ask for a GAL to be appointed for your daughter.  Once a GAL is appointed your daughter has an attorney whose is responsible for representing her only.   I am not sure how the GAL process works and I do believe the parents have to pay the fees but in this instance you will not be the only one required to pay....but I do not really know the answer.

However if CPS is truly dragging their feet you need to get an attorny involved.  While CPS may try to hide reports from you a judge can order they be viewed. 

It may not look good on him but it is not going to matter either.  It is sad that he will not see his son but it is not going to even matter when you go to court. There may be a reason as to why he has not made any contact or attempts to visit.   Considering he has an attorney it is possible that he has been advised to do just that very thing until paternity has been established.

There have been many men to proclaim a child is theirs only to later find out otherwise.  Whatever his legal strategy is I can't even begin to pretend to know but it seems some plan is in place. 

The first order was with me and then he got married right away when he had another child on the way.  There is a minimal amount, under $140 a month that was figured into our agreement for daycare.  There was at least three or four years I paid much more especially over the summer it was closer to $600 a month for full time daycare and never asked for the amount he paid to be raised. 

I originally went with what ever amount was set from the state child support formula and never asked for anything more.  Fortunately I am in a position with my new husband that not working is possible, its a little tight but worth it to be around more for my son before and after school and the summer with the current child support.  I want to be fair but I don't see how it would be in my son's best interest for me to be working full time again and sending him to before and after school care.  I just don't know how the court will look at this.  My ex has also wanted to lower the support ever since I got remarried because my husbands income, which is somewhere around what  he is currently making as well and because he has to pay support on his second child now as well.

I think the additional information shed's some light on the situation.  From the outside looking in it seems to me that your ex is only tryign to get child support reduced because he now has to pay for a second child as well.  I am not going to pretend to know michigan law but I did a little resarch and hopefully some of this will help you.

First I found a link to Michigan's child support formula http://courts.michigan.gov/scao/resources/publications/manuals/focb/2004mcsfmanual.pdf (http://courts.michigan.gov/scao/resources/publications/manuals/focb/2004mcsfmanual.pdf)

1. Accourding to the formule imputed salary is based on a voluntary reduction of salary.  My interpretation is that this mostly applies to the non-custodial parent and their attempt to avoid paying child support.  According to the law it does state that both parents need to be employed but I do not see where it the parent's income is taken into condsideration to determing child support.  I just don't see how a person should pay less child support because the custodial parent makes more money.

I found a document that talks about imputing salary with case law.  It seems each instance talks the the person paying child support and their attempts to circumvent the law to avoid paying. http://www.dflaw.com/tasks/sites/deanfulkerson/assets/image/Mother%20Theresa%20(PJM).pdf (http://www.dflaw.com/tasks/sites/deanfulkerson/assets/image/Mother%20Theresa%20(PJM).pdf)

All of the information I can find on imputing salary deal with the person paying support.  I have not been able to find any instances where child support was decreased because the custodial parent did not have a job.

I hope this info helps. I am will continue researching and if I find someting I will post it here.

[I set everything to electronic today. Everything will now be emailed to us and stored online. I'm just worried she may have gotten our SSNs and DOBs for me and our 3 bios...

I don't think that information is available through your insurance website. I think HIPAA laws would prevent that. Your (or his) employer keeps that data but I don't recall every seeing my SSN visible on my insurance website. I think DOB may be there but not too sure.

Not unless the court order allows it.  She has rights to information pertaining to the child but must request it if I am not mistake.

I have my kids on my insurance and I have turned off all paper mail. Anything directly related to my insurance is all done on line and I am the only one authorized to make any changes.  My ex has an insurance card in her posession and can use it for the children.  Other than that I do not grant her any access to anything unless she has an absolute need.