Messages

I have come to conclusion that asking why the courts do things they do is way beyond me. I understand that getting custody is a very hard thing to do. But with that said, I read the biggest reason that Fathers don't get custody is because they don't try. I will never stop trying to give my children the life that they deserve, so if it takes every last cent I have or can get, I will continue to fight for my children. I have no problem giving up child support and if it comes to that, I will do so. If I have to pay the Ex to get the children, I will do so. She has agreed to several things through text and email, its the problem of getting her to follow through with it. In mediation, there is someone there that can witness the agreement and have the paper work drawn up quickly so that everything she agrees to will happen.

She and her Lawyer has been pushing mediation back for various reasons. Her Lawyer was sent a letter yesterday stating that they had a week to agree on a mediation date and to make it.

I will offer the money that is owed to me in Mediation, which is about 20,000. She knows that if she loses custody, she will be loosing over 2000.00 a Month, so Im sure she will not agree to it.

The problem with an Emergency hearing is that we are required to go through Mediation first. The Judge will demand this. My Attorney stated that he has set before this Judge many times and he has had several cases that the Judge has Said "It was your choice to put them in school and now I am making the decision to do what is in the best interest of the children and changing the custody order and moving them to a stable environment and school".

Contempt was Money that was owed to me through the Original Divorce that she hasn't made a payment on in 2 years. We went to court previously on the same contempt charges and she got a slap on the hand and was told if she missed one payment, she would be held in contempt. The other was not going by the order of the court to use the OFW website.

Will a Judge go back and review the case before we return to court? If he does, he will see that every promise that she has made was a empty promise. I guess I should say that she was found in 2 accounts of contempt yesterday. He knows that she will not follow through with anything she promises.

I talked to my Attorney yesterday, we have everything in place to go to court to try to get custody. He said that I have a Very good chance with all that has happened over the last 3 years. My Ex has told the kids that once they start school, a Judge will not take them out of school so there is no chance of me getting custody of them. She moved to another town in June with another boyfriend so I would not have time to fight it before school. My Attorney disagreed with this and said that if it is in the best interest for the children, that the Judge will have no problem taking them out of a school to put them in another. What do you guys think? Would that be a factor that could keep me from getting custody?

Thank you all for all your information. I do understand that it is a uphill battle and I agree that every state, every Judge and every case is different. I have searched the internet for help how to win custody and can prove everything that I have read that should award you custody. But in the end, It all depends on what kind of mood the Judge is in and how your attorney presents his case. I have been reading several appeals from my state and it seems once you appeal, the Supreme Court looks at the case from a legal stand point and the best interest of the children. I just cant sit back and do nothing. My Goal is to either get my children back and give them the best home possible, or at least tell them when they are grown that I did everything in my power to do what was best for you.

I do not have a court date yet, I live in the state of Kansas and must go to mediation first. There is no way to get it done before the school year and Im sure that was her plan. My attorney said that since it is a new school, He has seen the Judge pull them out early on before. There are other issues I was going to try to use in mediation as well. She is suppose to be paying me 200 a month for past bills that were acquired while we were married, she has not paid them in nearly 2 years. The total comes to about 25,000.00. I was going to negotiate that during mediation. I know there is no Madness to the court system and do not put much faith in it at all, But I always hope that the squeaky wheel will get greased so to say.

The 14 year old says he really does not care where he lives at this point. Its sad, But I think he is so use to change that he really doesn't care. She now lives in a 4 bedroom house with her boyfriend and his 4 kids. So, 9 of them will be living in a 4 bedroom house. When I asked him where he sleeps, He says wherever he can find, Usually on a couch or something. I live in a 6 bedroom house with My wife and 2 step children. Everyone has their own room.  He knowa that he will no longer be at the same school regardless of where he goes. The 9 year old wants to come live with me and has told her mother this before, Im sure she will deny it though.

Let me first say the Divorce was 4 years ago, Not 10, Sorry, Typo. The children are 9 and 14. I do have all records showing the Grades, He had as many as 16 F's In one class, 11 of these were in a row. I have Text Messages where I ask her what she is doing about their Grades. I have Emails from their teachers trying to do what I could to get their grades up.  I have printed out the Calendar that we are suppose to be putting all the events on showing that she has not logged in Since November of last year. I have documents showing where I was sent to collections for her not paying bills for Medical attention giving to the kids. They have missed about 7 days during the school year, I don't think that is really enough to much faith in. 

I am Finally Taking my Ex back for residential custody. I was wondering if anyone has seen a Father get custody for the same reason as follows.

My Ex and I divorced about 10 years ago. We decided on a 50/50 custody with our 2 children. After a year, she met a guy she wanted to move in with. This would have been fine, but he lived 60 miles away and she wanted to move the kids. Long story short, she decided to marry him and  ended up with residential custody. the Judge stated the only reason she got them was because she was the primary care giver. She has them during the school year and every other weekend during the summer. I get them during the summer and every other weekend in during the school year.  A year later while on my way to pick the kids up for my weekend, I get a text telling me to pick the kids up at a different address. I go by the address and find out that she and the kids moved out. I found out that he had been making threats to the kids of abuse. I put a restraining order on him to keep him away from the kids and Guess what, when we went to court she was there to testify for him so the restraining order would not stick. After loosing the hearing, the same day, she put a restraining order to protect her, not the kids.

During her divorce, I find out that her and the kids are spending the night at another mans house on the weekends. I ask her where is having the kids spend the night in another's mans house before your divorce is even final in the best interest of the kids. As always when I confront her about things, I get no reply. ( I learned along time ago, always text or email, there is proof). To make  a long story short, I received a letter last week stating that she moved in with her boyfriend 20 miles further and the kids will be living there and going to another school in another town.

Ther is much more to the story like she ahs had 5 jobs in the past 3 years, I have taken her to court for not communicating kids activities of which the Judge made us use a online calendar of which she hasn't logged in to since November. My son 11 F's in a row because she doesn't make him do his homework of which I got him lined out on and he barley passed.

About me, I purchased a house three years ago, I am remarried and have been for three years. I live in the same town that I did when we divorced. My job is stable and I am not planning on going anywhere.   

My Question is, Has anyone ever seen residential custody changed because of instability or not having the best interest of the children in mind?  Any information would help.