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What in the world is she doing?

Started by Ref, Jul 19, 2004, 10:22:50 AM

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Ref

DH and BM went to mediation for him to increase visitation. He got pretty much everything her asked for. At the end, in the usual fashion of the BM, she  pointed out that she would like to discuss CS, with a smirk. DH agreed. The mediation agreement called for them to work it out on their own, if that doesn't work they are to go to mediation and if that doesn't work they can go to the court.

BM will get an increase. Not a prob. The only issue is the most common on this board, BM hates work. Government housing, welfare, the works. DH detests the thought of SD's CS going to mom's liquor.

The mediation agreement was signed by the judge about a month ago. BM hasn't brought it up until now. Kinda. She filed her financial affidavit with the clerk of the court. The agreement says that they are to share financial information, but does DH have to fill out this detailed report, or can he just offer her the info that she requests? She has yet to speak or write to him about this and he has not received her financial affidavit.

The mediation agreement has no timeline. When would the clock start ticking for the adjustment? Should he be socking away money as soon as he gets her affidavit or would it only start if it goes to court?


Thanks everyone!

Bolivar OH

I have a negotiation idea.

"Gavron Warning" -- and admonition that the court often makes requiring the supported spouse to become self-supporting within a reasonable period of time. Where the duration of the marriage is less than ten years a spouse is expected to be self-supporting within half the length of the marriage as measured between the date of marriage and date of separation. However, a marriage with a duration of more than ten years has no such time rule.

Sounds like with the threat of work she might be more willing to settle.

Just a thought.

wendl

pull up cs info online at our coutys website.

The normal is 2yrs of tax return (make sure if you file jointly with dh to cross our your Social security # etc, bm doesn't need this info) and about 3-6 months of pay stubs.

I know in my state if the other parent fails to work or is underemployed you may impute their income based on a what a man/woman of this age would make on the average.  

Also if the kids need daycare SPECIFY WORK RELATED ONLY and that you will pay the bill upon receipt of attendence etc directly to the daycare provider.

:)
**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

stressedstepmom

Can you give me more information on "Gavron Warning"? DHs ex filed for an increase in CS the same day she tried to stop visitation but we just now got the papers on it. DH and ex were married about 2 years and have been divorced 11. She has a choppy job history, yet when she does decide to work she takes jobs that are below her potential (she has a masters to teach and takes day care jobs) she has also lived in her parents basement rent free all these years. In her petition she states she wants the increase due to the cost of food and clothes going up in price. DH is military and SSs have had military id cards since they were 6 &5. She also lives near a reserve base yet doesn't take advantage of the commissary (she is allowed to go in with them but only purchase food and items for the boys) She also states that the boys are involved in extra curricular activities (hockey) I have read on here that extra curricular things aren't a part of child support, that it is on the side. She leaves out of course that she volunteers so YSS plays for free, or the fact that my FIL bought him all new equipment last year.
She did call today and leave a message for DH that she withdrew her petition, but we don't believe a word she says anymore and DH has to call the courthouse tomorrow and see. But we also know from past experiences that if she doesn't do this now she will do it soon. Sorry if I am rambling, she is hitting us with one thing after another right now and we are very stressed and looking for ways to stop all of this harassment. Any info or advice would be greatly appreciated.

rini

she is eligible for modification back to date of filing  (retroactive)