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sticky situation, don't know what to do!

Started by graciesmom, Feb 06, 2005, 09:03:14 PM

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LAK

if the mother is indeed pursuing this.  CSE does what they want, and if the order was always with them, then without an order to stop it, they'll continue to enforce it.  

Is it possible that the mother has no idea this is going on?  If not, she may help you straighten it out and tell CSE that she wants to drop the arrears.

I know someone going through that right now.  The ex doesn't want the support, but CSE is taking action to collect it anyway.  Both parties are in the process of going to court to get it stopped.  

graciesmom

I have thought that too, but in an email that we were sent copies of originating with the german caseworker, it clearly stated that the mother was very upset and feels her case had been neglected.  You see, it looks like Germany tried to register our case with our county CSE back in August of 2002, nothing happend.  Germany tried to register again in July 2004, and we have just now been contacted January 2005.  So it appears, and I don't know for sure, that the mother contacted German CSE and wanted to start collecting again.  It would seem that she hasn't made mention of the fact she asked him to stop paying or either CSE said too bad it has to be paid.  We just don't know that. I also told the caseworker here the story and she said she was going to send our comments and such to the German caseworker.  So someone knows, but it will not make a difference, without going to court, and that isn't an option for us right now.  I have actually asked my husband to write to her a letter himself and ask her point blank what the truth is, I would love to know.  Remember, this is not your typical situation.  He hasn't seen this woman in 16-17 years, only a few letters from her over the years.  
I keep hoping that after this is all said and done, she will mail us a check for the 10 years she didn't want the child support and return the money that is rightfully ours.  I can dream can't I :)

chihuahua

Hey Amy,Sorry I am a little late in responding I just came across this web site.BOY, Can I relate to you and your situation I hope that maybe you can help me or if anyone can help.........Where to start,My fiance MK was divorced in 1997 in Tennessee his divorce papers state that he gets visatation on weekends ect.Well she got remarried 6 months later.She remarried a military man.$$$$$Well she has been to MO,TN,TX,NY and Germany.Well appartently she just came back to the states and is now in CO.Well my fiance went in front of NY judge and he was originally suppose to pay 150.00 a week but the judge yelled at him and said he can only force whats in front of him and wanted him to pay 150.00 a month instead.That was in 2000.In December right before X-Mas we got a warrant to pay NY 2017.00.We paid and had our worse X-Mas.Now 3 months later MO sends us a letter that says he owes 33,000.00!WOW.I about fell off the earth.We called NY and they said he owes nothing and actually has a credit.Well MO says mail us what you have.Id like to metion theres 3 kids involved and 1 he adopted which is not his AT ALL.Does anyone have any idea why these 2 states are involved?How can we not be responsible for the adopted kid?Who is now 18.Id appreciate any info on this matter I look forward to a responce.

graciesmom

I am probably not the best person to ask.  What I have found is that dealing with the child support offices is that they  are quick to find you and contact you when they want money from you, but as slow as Christmas when it comes to taking care of business and resolving their mistakes.  We have been dealing with this for about a month now and still no answers.  
As far as your situation goes, if I am clear, then it doesn't make sense that MO is trying to collect if your original judement was in NY and they say you have a credit.  Unless he received a new judgement from the state of MO, then he shouldn't owe them.  Did you post your message anywhere else.  My topic has been kinda dead lately as I have been moving and not checking back very often and my case is kinda at a stand still at the moment.  If you haven't post a new message.  Everyone was very helpful to me.  
I think I would talk to a lawyer if you could.  
Good luck,
Amy

chihuahua

It originated in TN when he got divorced.But then she went to MO and got that child support unit to go after him. Well to hear a good one......When he went to get ordered to pay support they immediatly starting his bill at 3000.00 and an additional 150.00 a week. Well 2 years went by and he was in NY at that time.Then NY brought him into court as he wasn't paying MO and that judge told him he can only enforce whats in front of him and ordered him to pay 150.00 a month and asked if he had a problem with that./Of course he didn't.So I am guessing that NY over rules MO.

The judges paper says ORDER DISMISSING PETITION.
It appearing that a NY court does not have authority to modify the TN order of support, it is ORDERED, that the petition is dismissed.

What the heck all that bumble jumble means is beyond me.All I know is we have all papers dated 1997 (should have been 2000) and they all say 150.00 a month from NY.

At this time we can't afford a lawyer and legal aide told him he makes to much on unemployment for them to help.Figure that out.

I have only posted messages here.I'm not sure how I found this website but now I'm addicted to responces.I read your entire message board the other night to my sweetie and boy we could relate to you.I wanted to talk to you as it sounds like almost the same.

But unfortunatly my honey adopted HER kid when they were married.Well he has still paid support and she has remarried 6 months after there divorce.Sounds like she didn't wait for the sheets to cool down before moving in MR.Military Man.Remind you my honey was in the ARMY for 10 years and took a lump sum to get out as he had kids and was married.I guess he was hopeing for a life with her but instead after he cashed out and got a 7.00 an hour job it took her 2 years to wipe them out.
It goes so much deeper but I would be here all day.I can only hope and pray that something good comes out of it.
Which makes this worse is we are trying to buy our first home together.I have never been married and have no kids so I really am not use to all this BS.I'm hanging in there.

Mom with a couple of chihuahuas.

thanks graciesmom!