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yup, she's a gold digger

Started by melissa3, Feb 23, 2006, 01:17:05 PM

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melissa3

What do you do when the ex wants you to support them, along with the children, and they ask for the money in the form of child supprt?

My fiance's ex has motioned for a raise in child support, claiming she can't afford to raise their daughter unless my fiance pays more.  However, the ex has a good job that pays well and she brings home a bigger paycheck than my fiance. She can't afford things because she's paying mortgage on the house they used to share but has neglected to rent out the lower appartment. In other words, she'd rather make my fiance pay more in child support than get off her lazy butt and rent out the lower half of her house, which would bring in an extra $600-$800 a month.

It's a perfectly good appartment and is in decent shape, there is no reason for it to be vacant. She's even had offers but she never returned the calls.

How can we prove in court that the ex is willfully not renting out the appartment?

Will the courts see that she is just playing games?

leon clugston

her motion to raise support has to show a significant change in circumstances, wether its in the form of the needs of the child increaing, or an increase in youre fiance's income to justify, warrant a motion to change.

ocean

In most states it is a percentage of the NCP's income. What state? Many states have on-line calculators. Plug in the numbers and see what it comes out with. In my state, 1 child =17% , 2 children 25%....   When was the last time CS was addressed in court?

melissa3

We all live in Mass. The daughter is 5yrs and is in daycare and dance class.

I checked out the guidelines and if the BM rented the appartment for about $700 my fiances C/S obligation would (supposedly) be reduced by $20. Not much of a difference, I'd say.

There has been no change of circumstances on the BMs part. My fiance is self-employed and we've found the courts don't look to highly on that, especially when your business is seasonal. Winter is the bad season and Bm really picked a good time to play games in court if you ask me.

From the list of expenses the BM gave us I figured out that she would be broke anyway, regardless of the cost of child care. She actually needs to rent out the lower appartment just to supprt herself.

See, the BM thinks that all her financial problems are because my fiance isn't paying her enough. She doesn't realize that he isnt' obligated to may alimony, he just has to help support his daughter.

Sherry1

strictly follow the CS guidelines.  Your DH's tax returns will probably be used to determine his CS.  Most states require the NCP to also pay a portion of daycare, you should probably look into that also.

melissa3

According to the guidelines, any income from rental property, from either parent, is factored into the formula for calculating CS.

The problem here is BM can't provide for herself and I don't believe a small increase in CS is going to change that.

BM emailed us a list of what it costs her monthly  to pay for heat, electricty, mortgage, utilities and car insurance. (note: child care is split pretty evenly between the parents.) She can't afford her cost of living with what she brings home for pay and with leaving the apartment vacant. The house BM owns and lives in is a two-family and she's paying to heat and light the whole thing.

There has been no significant change in circumstances and there is no need for an increase in CS. All I'm asking is, how can we get the courts to understand that all BM needs to be able to provide for their daughter is to rent out her lower apartment?

Thank you

leon clugston

The custodial parent has to be able to show the increase need for the child, regaurdless of her expences, as far as her personal costs you should file a motion in opposition of those finances since they have no correlation w/ the subject matter at hand, which is the allegedness of the expenses of the child has increased. What people tend to forget it all has to be coreelated w/ the child and in the enterest of the child, the common law of the responsibilities is that both parents contribute to the care nuture and the welfare of the child, not just one. People think these guidelines are god, but they dont hold weight when a person attacks them within there substantiveness and the overall application of there validity.

Sherry1

that is the problem.. His CS will be based upon her income and your DH's income.  If daycare is involved, he will probably be ordered to pay a percentage of that too.  

Our BM is the most stupid woman on the planet, she never uses common sense for anything.  It sounds like you have the same idiot of a BM.  You can't reason with her and a court isn't going to force her to rent out the apartment.  I do sympathize with you but you can't do what you have no control over.

If incomes haven't changed much, don't worry about it, CS probably won't go up.  You can find probably find a child support calculator for the state the order is in so you can run the numbers ahead of time.

ocean

I am not in your state so I do not know but they will just take both set of taxes and figure it out from there. She probably wants to go for the higher child support first and then rent it out. What is her reasoning for not renting it out? Why is she sending you all personal info? I would just e-mail that the numbers work out and that she needs to make adjustments (like rent out the apartment) but that is NOT you problem. I agree with everyone else, you will be court ordered (if you are not already) for a percentage of daycare costs while she as at work. Good luck!

Genie

the upkeep of the home is part of taking care of the child b/c it is putting a roof over the child's head etc etc.  CS is looked on to help pay those things.  Now if she is living beyond her means that is something else but I don't think that the judge will make a deal of that.  In my experiences with ex's first wife, the judges didn't.

She can make alot of arguments for not renting that out.  Main one being that she is afraid or isn't comfortable with strangers living beneath her since there isn't a man around (that makes a woman feel safer or more at ease many times). I don't know if she is with someone else in her life or not.

Also from experience she may not want to sell the home that she worked hard to get and feels is her home. She doesn't want to uproot the child from her home, friends, school etc. Stability is the factor here. Moving to an apartment is not as good as a house for the child (in a parent's mind). If she moves to an apartment, there is possibility she will be moving from place to place on a regular basis. If she stays in teh house, the child won't be subjected to that. Many have lost custody when one factor is not giving the child a stable home. In my case, I can afford my house, in her case she can't by herself.

I am not making excuses for her. I am giving you her possible defenses to your solution.  Think about how you can react if these come up.

As stated, guideline is guideline.  Most likely she will get this increase.  However, from what you said it doesn't sound like that will be much. And as you stated renting the apartment would only save $20 in CS a month. Will the judge order way above?  It has happened in many cases.

On a side note: I have never understood why some CP's feel they shouldn't do what is necessary to give their children what they need. Most parent's scrimp and save and budget and do without to give their kids what they need and do without the extras so the kids can have them. However, why do some CPs feel they don't have to do that but the NCP should do so in order to pay more and more while the CP spends and spends?  Never understood that one.