Child Support Woes

[JVondrak76]

Hi everyone, I am new to the forum.  And I desperately need advice.  My husband was married previously, and has two children, ages 9 and 7.  His ex-wife was a legal secretary, and her boss did her divorce work for free.  My husband was in school and not working at the time of the divorce, so he couldn't afford his own attorney.  There was no distribution of marital debt – he got stuck with over $100,000 in debt she helped him accrue, and he got stuck paying $502.40 per month in support.  Her attorney based it off of my husband's last job before he started school, telling him that if he claimed no income, the judge wouldn't let him see his kids.  

His ex got remarried two months after their divorce was final, and was already pregnant again.  As soon as their divorce was final, she quit her job and hasn't worked since – that was six years ago.  We have gone through every legal battle imaginable with her, including custody disputes because she refused to let us have visitation.  She has five kids total now, and stays at home, even though 4 of 5 kids are in school all day.  

She is now claiming financial hardship, even though she gets support from us, and her husband makes more than mine does, but she still refuses to get a job.  This is a woman who just went on a week long trip to Mexico.  My husband and I both work full-time jobs, and we have a 16 month old daughter that we have to send to daycare full-time, which is not cheap.  

We received paperwork from the child support recovery unit two days ago stating that his ex is seeking an administrative review and adjustment.  Because she has no income, my husband pays her 35.7% of his net income.  I did the child support estimator online, and I show that his support is going to go from $502.40 per month to $872.00 per month.  This is going to kill us financially.  We are already in the process of selling our house because our ARM interest rate just went up 3% and we can't afford the payments.  We can't refinance because my husband had to file Chapter 7 bankruptcy last summer to get rid of all the debt his ex left him with, so his credit is bad.  We are going to end up renting an apartment now.  

I contacted a lawyer and asked if we should contest the child support findings and request a hearing, but was told it won't do us any good.  Judges always go off the numbers pursuant to the guidelines, even though we will be living in poverty.  So, his ex can sit at home all day and not work, but we have to bust our butts to pay her more money, and our little girl is going to suffer now?  No one cares that we can't adequately support our child because his ex refuses to get a job and help support her own children!   I can't find anyone to help us!  This can't be right!

[williaer]

I would say there has been no change in circumstances tha would warrant a review of the child support. Is there no guidline for it. Did you take the federal tax deduction for your child, that will adjust his income downward some- making the total income less.

this really sucks and I would say, if you can find any way to swing it- get an attorney. We went through something similar with my Dh's ex and my parents helped us to get an attorney and we ended up getting the child support cut in half and the right to claim her as a tax deduction. It can happen- it just takes perserverance.

Are the kids in any kind of child care? If not then what would be the grounds for her getting more money?

GOOD LUCK!

[JVondrak76]

We do claim one of the kids as a tax deduction.  We are in Iowa, and the guidelines here are so bizarre.  The X stays home all day, so no need for any child care.  4 of the 5 kids are in school all day, the youngest will be 5 in November.  In Iowa, for an administrative review and adjustment, you don't have to have a substantial change in circumstances.  A review and adjustment can be requested every two years, and if my husband has had a 20% increase in his gross wages, the support will be increased.  That works out to about $5k in wage increases in 2 years, which he has had.  So because she has zero income, my husband has to give her over 35% of his net wages in support, even though the x's husband makes more than my husband!  I have contacted 2 lawyers, and both told me we are basically "screwed" - the judge won't deviate from the guidelines unless one of us has major medical issues.  So, the X gets to stay home and do nothing all day (she's not much of a domestic goddess) while the kids are in school, while my husband and I break our backs to make sure she gets another new suburban to drive, and gets to take nice trips to Mexico.  It's just not right, and I can't find anyone to help us try to make the support payments equitable.  

[step_momma_2boys]

Does the state not compute her wages at minimum wage for 40 hrs a week?  Even if she doesn't work, I thought CS was based on both parents contributing to the child.  In our state, even if a parent just stays at home, their wages would be set at minimum wage at 40 hrs a week.  In our state, it is assumed, given there are not medical reasons a parent cannot work, that each parent can work at least 40 hrs a week.  I would press for that at the very least, or try to have her wages for what she was doing (legal secretary) computed for what the average person in that field makes an hour in your area.  I would do some checking into that if I were you.

We almost had to go through a review in which the BM was going to start.  She had voluntarily left her job and was telling me how she was going to ask for a CS review.  I told her to go ahead because I had already checked it out and because she VOLUNTARILY left her job, we would push to have her wages computed for the going rate in her area.  That would have amounted to $1.50 more an hour than what she was making when she left her job.  She, of course, didn't believe me and I told her to contact their case worker, since she is the one who told me how much they could compute BM's wages at.  Well...... that review never came forward.  BM must have checked to see if I was telling the truth and I was, of course.  She ended up going back to work since she found out she wouldn't be able to sit at home and live off of us!  LOL

[reagantrooper]

Welcome to my world!! The world of involentary servitude. Work work work to hand out all that free money afterall she needs her BON BONS!
Sorry no advice except to just keep plugging away!

[Giggles]

Was the BM working prior to the divorce?  Can't your DH get her income "imputed"?  I think you can get an income inputed....also, you may get credit for your additional child?

[Skippy89]

Child Support should calculate her income as "potential income" based on her previous work.  At the very least they should calculate it at minimim wage.  Most states will not look at spouses income as they are not financially responsible for children that are not theirs.

I would file an answer with the courts once you are served with the complaint.  You have every right to have your side of the story heard.

If you have custody in your order I would file contempt against the mother for not letting you see the children.  

[JVondrak76]

I cannot find an attorney to agree to impute her potential income based on her previous work.  I know they won't look at her husband's income - but they look at mine!  I don't think my income should be considered since the children are not mine either.  But, CSRU claims they must look at my income to "get a better picture of how much my husband can contribute."  It's totally biased towards the custodial parent, even though she has more money and resources than we do.  

We are going to contest the order and request a hearing, but I'm not very optimistic that a judge will deviate from the guidelines.  Not much history of it unless there are extenuating circumstances - such as large amounts of medical bills.  We'll see what happens.

[IceMountain]

This is what CSRU told me:

They cannot impute the CP's earning potential, only a judge can do that, so if you want her earning potential entered you will have to appeal it and go to court.

Go to Iowa Workforce Development website.  Find out what the median wage is for a legal secretary (that is what she did, correct?) in your area of the state.  Print off what it says and take it to court.  You can use the figure to prove what her earning potential is.  (If you need help with the search, let me know)

Like I said, CSRU will not impute this number for you, you must go to court to get it done!  Also, don't forget the deductions for uncovered medical ($25.00 a month - my lawyer says everyone gets it) and health insurance (whether paid by your husband or you).

As far as them looking at your income, again according to CSRU, they don't use it to determine the child support amount, but to get a better financial picture in the home.  The actual child support worksheet will include only your husband's income and his ex's income.  Now, if you were loaded with $$$ there is no doubt in my mind they would look at household income to determine child support, but by reading your posts I can see that you aren't sitting on a pot of gold so there is no need to worry about providing your income.  (but I agree it's a crock!)

Make sure when you go to court you have child support guideline worksheets filled out that show her earning potential.  

One more thing, imputing her earning potential will also help lessen your husband's share of the uncovered medical.  (my husband's is 100% responsible for uncovered medical because the ex had negative income after the deduction for her other child.  When the court reviewed support in March (private action) they found no need for an adjustment so even though we had her earning capacity entered, the order didnt' change so he is still 100% responsible for uncovered medical.)

[JVondrak76]

This was very helpful - thank you!  You have an Iowa child support case also?  I looked up the median income for a legal secretary on the IWD website - I can't believe it!  It says the median income in our region (12) is $13.36 an hour!  That is huge for us!  I did the support estimator online again, and it brought the support down to $786.00 from $872.00.  We do claim the $25 in medical expenses.  Can we claim our health insurance premium if it is just myself, my husband, and our daughter?  His X opted to have her husband carry the insurance on the 2 kids in question because she doesn't want to have to carry around 2 sets of insurance cards.  So - I bet only she can claim the insurance premiums.  But still - if we can get the judge to impute her wages based on the median wage for legal secretaries, that would be so great.  Was it hard for you to convince the judge to do it for you?

[Kitty C.]

Are you in or near Sioux City?  I'm in Region 10, Iowa City area.  Let me know if I can be of help, as well.  

DH has his support thru CSRU but we haven't had any problems with them and luckily BM hasn't exercised her right to ask for a review every 2 years.  She went thru another divorce last year and 'suddenly' has been very amicable and agreeable.  Last year at one of SS's football games, she mentioned something about it to DH, but said that they were 'getting along so good, I don't want to mess it up'.  I almost had a heart attack on that one, LOL!  Apparently SS overheard the conversation and he told BM that if she 'ever' tried to get more support from DH, he would disown her and leave to live with us!  Out of the mouths of babes!

[JVondrak76]

Yep, I'm in Sioux City.  My husband and his X don't get along AT ALL.  Lots of animosity.  It's very stressful.  She's very vindictive - it's just really a waste of energy for everyone.  I hope to get this CSRU issue resolved soon so I can not worry about it for another two years!  

I think once my stepkids are older, at least one of them will ask to live with us.  It's a sad situation.

[IceMountain]

You can only get the health insurance deduction if the child is covered under the policy.

It wasn't hard to get the judge to impute her earning capacity because the ex testified that she was able to work and had looked for work only very minimally.  In addition she had just finished a temp job a couple months before trial, so that helped to prove she was able to work.  

Does the child she stays home with have any type of disability that requires extra care and that she might try to use as an excuse for not working?  Any other forseable excuses for not working?  If so, do the legwork to rebut what she might try to pull in court.

[JVondrak76]

I am nervous about what the ex will tell the judge when asked if she is "able" to work.  She has no impairments or disabilities to prevent her from working - she's very much employable.  She always falls back on her religion, stating that she believes children are better off at home, instead of in daycare, she wants to homeschool, etc. etc.  I know she will come up with something.  

The only child at home will be five in November - and as far as I know, he has no special needs.  He appears to be perfectly normal.  

The ex lives on an acreage, and grows a vegetable garden, and raises chickens, so she periodically sells eggs and vegetables and other homemade goods on Saturday mornings at a local farmers market in town.  She hasn't been doing that though since she started this review action.  That should also prove she is able to work, hopefully.  I just don't trust her - she is very underhanded.  I am really nervous about this.  

What paperwork did you take with you to give to the judge regarding imputing the X's income?

[Skippy89]

Imputing Income
The act of awarding potential income to individuals not employed or voluntarily underemployed; the CSEA or court may project utilizing the child support guidelines, an income base for purposes of establishing a support obligation.

Your spouse could make the same claim that he also feels he should be in the home raising his children.  She has a financial responsiblity to her children just as much as he does.  If she were to get divorced or her husband died and she had no income, she would probably be getting a job doing what she knows how to do to support the children.

I would find any State Statute I could find regarding potential income.

[IceMountain]

My lawyer presented a child support worksheet with her earning capacity entered.  During our trial my ex was questioned, by my attorney, about her ability to work and her work searches.  I submitted the IWD printout as part of my evidence.  That was it.  

[JVondrak76]

I found an attorney in Des Moines willing to impute the X's income on the CSRU worksheets.  He is optimistic that a judge will agree - he does this on a regular basis.  I can't understand why no Sioux City attorneys would do this for us?  

[ckholton]

Hi I am new to the forum, but have 13 years of dealing with an ex and child support.  I know that in most states if a custodial parent if not employed their income is figured at minimum wage for that area or if they work previously they go by what they were making because that is considered potiental income.  My husband had to have surgery on his shoulder and was out of work, his ex took him back to court and even though he was not working and he may not beable to go back to that same line of work they went on what he made at his previous job. It was unbelievable.  

Our problem now is that the arrears that were created due to his injury and when he was down right stupid handing her cash, there is a lien on his credit and the amount of arrears is not coming down because they add $30 to $70 a week interest.  We see no way of this getting paid off.

[Kitty C.]

Question about those Sioux City attys.:  Are they general practice attys. or do they specialize in family law?  If it's the former, then you're talking to the wrong attys.  If it's the latter, they need to be educated!  Once you have the ex's income inputed, send a copy to them as an example and tell them this is what you were talking about.  Also tell them that you will let everyone you know who is looking for a divorce atty. that they may call themselves family law attys., but they have severe gaps in knowledge about it!

[JVondrak76]

UPDATE:  We received the computation from CSRU, and they want to raise our support payments from $502.40 to $946.00 per month, and the X once again claimed zero income on her financials.  I spoke to an attorney in Des Moines who said we can have her wages imputed at the median wage for a legal secretary in our region, which is $13.36 per hour, BUT the judge is likely to then factor in child care expenses in her favor.  So, it may be a wash anyway!  This is just crazy.  She intentionally remains unemployed or underemployed to manipulate the child support system - we are basically providing this woman with welfare.  Her husband makes more money than my husband does - but that doesn't seem to matter.  I'm not sure what we're going to do now.  Any suggestions?

[mistoffolees]

Not so sure. In my case, they DID consider my income in determining support for my wife's daughters from a previous marriage. The point that matters is 'will the kids be properly supported'. Since by marrying the mother I took on her obligations, I was counted as a source of support.