Some good news

[c_alexander]

I wanted to update everyone on my move from Indiana to Colorado to be with my daughter, my Parents Rights Ribbons, and all the craziness that has been going on here.

To begin with and for those who don't know my daughter was forced to move over 1000 miles away from all of her family and friends 2 years ago as a result of her mothers pursuit of a new boyfriend. The last few years have been pretty tough without my 9 year old around so I began a campaign to raise the funds I needed to move to Colorado so I can once again be near my little girl.

I have been working almost non stop these last several months to save all I can, I began offering Parents Rights Awareness ribbons like the ones you see on cars for "Support Our Troops" to help raise awareness of our cause and to raise funds to help with my move.

As my deadline approaches (my currently living situation expires on August 1st of this year) I have found a VERY generous single mother in Denver who is sympathetic to my plight and has offered to open her home to me until I can get mon my feet.

Also I had a major set back to my move overted recently. My car blew up about 2 months ago and it didn't look like I was going to be able to find one affordable and yet reliable enough to get me out to Colorado. Thanks again to a very generous person I managed to get a very reliable car in near mint condition for next to nothing.

It would seem that things are falling into place very well and I am overwhlemed by the generousity and assistance so many people out there have offered me and my daughter.  Thank you all for your support..it is because of you that in a few short weeks I will be once again living close to my daughter.

[MixedBag]

Good luck!

Moving is never easy, period, under any circumstances...

Keep us posted!

[wendl]

That is great Chris, you have worked hard and had many struggles.

Seems things are looking up.

Hope this continues.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[MYSONSDAD]

You just get your butt out there and report back about how great it is to be closer to your daughter. What do your orders say in regard to visitation? Will they allow more time if your there?

If it makes you feel better, I have an aunt who moved out there several years ago. Went with not a dime to her name. Very friendly people and she never came back here.

Just take a step at a time, you will be fine.

"Children learn what they live"

[sheerdark]

Thanks for posting your story.  I purchased 2 ribbons from you tonight.  I can't wait to put one on my car and the other on my mother's car.

I wish you and your daughter the best of luck!  I also wish that I could donate more to your cause, but I'm still currently fighting my own battles.

[c_alexander]

Well my ex wife and I have been working on an agreement for visitation which our judge has agreed to put into our decree before my move. Check out the agreement below:


1.   Parenting time alternating weekends from Friday 3pm till Sunday at 6pm

2.   Parenting time two consecutive nights (overnight) per week on weeks I do not have her on weekends. These days dependent upon both parents' schedules.

3.   Parenting time any other time upon the request of Child or me with the approval of both parents.

4.   First call on parenting time instead of babysitter (including step siblings), or leaving child at home alone, or in the care of any other family or friend

5.   Alternating holidays and Jessie's birthdays with mother to have child X-Mas day and childs b-day 2005 and father to have Thanksgiving and Independence day.

6.   daughter always with mother on mothers day and mothers birthday and with father on fathers day and fathers birthday unless other arrangements are made

7.   Parents will split evenly the costs of transporting child. Unless other arrangements can be made father  will pick child up for parenting time and mother will pick up child at end of parenting time

8.   Parents will, when possible, split the costs of extra curricular activities (upon approval of activity by both parents) including soccer, Girl scouts, field trips, or similar event. Parents will not enroll child into any activity that takes place during the other parents parenting time WITHOUT that parents consent.

9.   Each parent responsible for at least 1 trip per year back to Indiana to allow child visitation time with family members here for no less then 1 week. (one trip I pay for child to visit father's family, 1 trip mother pays for child to visit mothers family) ** she did not agree to this one

10.   Father wants to be informed of all parent teacher meetings or any other activity in which he can be involved with Jessie so he may be given the chance to participate (i.e. soccer, brownies, school meetings, or any other activity Jessie is involved in)

11.   If anything in this parenting time agreement does not work with parents schedule or another permanent arrangement can be worked out (such as joint physical custody) this agreement may be altered. Amendments to the agreement must be in writing and signed by both parents and each parent given a copy of the signed amendment.

12.   Custodial parent may not move further then 100 from Non-custodial parent with the child without the permission and consent of BOTH parents. The idea behind this is to ensure that Jessie will have equal access to both parents. Either parent may at anytime move out to the 100-mile radius however their custody and parenting may change. This is ONLY as a last resort if an agreement can not be made between the parents ( such as both parents moving to maintain the 100mile radius, etc) As an example if the non-custodial parent wished to move, a new agreement would have to be created in order to best suit the new living conditions and distance. If the custodial parent where to move they would require the permission of the non-custodial parent to move with child.


For the most part she agreed with this, except for the yearly trip to Indiana. As a matter of fact she has yet to come back to Indiana to visit her own mother. If it weren't for me our daughter would not have ANY visits with her grandmother.  Surprisingly however my ex DID agree with pretty much everything else. Wording is the only thing we need to work on befor ewe take it to the judge.

Thanks again all for the support....
Chris

[Kboeds]

Hey Chris, Glad to hear you are finally going to make it to Colorado.

Just a thought on # 12 on your list. I had/have concerns that my ex will leave with my daughter so our court order states....

It is ordered that, should (CP), relocate outside of (the county he lives in) or contiguous counties, he shall pay 100% of the cost of travel to and from the residence of KB. It is further ordered that (CP) shall give KB at least sixty days notice of his intent to relocate outside or that geographical area.

Basically if he moves I have 60 days to fight it, If I choose not to fight it or he moves anyway then I still keep my same court ordered visitation and he has to pay to get her to me for that visitation.

Just thought something like that may help with your wording.

Good luck and enjoy your new time with your daughter.

KB

[MYSONSDAD]

I am a little concerned over the holiday schedule. There are more holidays then what is suggested and you already lost 4th of July this year.

And document the pants off of #3. Tape your daughter when she wants more time or atleast, have plenty of witnesses. I feel this is too open and the BM will walk all over it.

Glad you got first call on Parenting time over someone spending time with your daughter. This will be to your advantage with employment not set at present. I would also work around the BM's schedule and take a different shift then what she works. This will make you available more often.

Hope your parents get their week. In Illinois, we have grandparent rights, check your statues.

Other then that, not too bad, except the holiday thing.

[c_alexander]

the reason for #12 is so that she can't move with our daughter ever again. Here in Indiana I fought the original move to Colorado. The laws here were much like in your agreement, but in the end the judge allowed the move despite my objections because...well to be honest because he was a biased idiot. He did order her to pay 100% of the travel costs, BUT  I have to drive 3 hours one way to pick her up from the only airport with direct flights from Denver 9 the only way an unaccompanied minor can fly). She also has scoffed at paying for the gas I use picking up and dropping off our daughter at the airport.

Bottom line I want it in writing that she agrees:
1. not to move over 100 miles away from me with our daughter
2. If she does move further then that she turns custody over to me
3. all of this while allowing some flexibility in case of situatiuon in which a move for both of us is possible and in our best interests or some other event.

[c_alexander]

These are only the holidays this year, they will alternate each year. Due to my ex wifes schedule and job she is often working holidays and in those cases we both agree it is best for the child to be with the parent that is off on that holiday..although perhap sI should add that stipulation in.

As for documentation...I document EVERYTHING..hehe writei it down, tape record all my calls and conversatiosn with her, etc, etc. I learned that one the hard way.

As for the grandparenting time I plan to uphold that party of the agreement with MY family. I have in the past taken some of my parenting time and let my ex mother-in-law take our daughter for a night or two for the sake of our daughter. My ex wife has not been back to Indiana to visit her own family since she moved and I am going to make sure she understands that after this summer if she wants our daughter to visit her mom or her family that SHE will have to handle it during HER time, not mine anymore.