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Need a few ideas

Started by Stepmom0418, Jan 15, 2005, 06:14:02 AM

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Stepmom0418

DH and his ex are in the middle of discovery. Ex's attorney has sent irrogs to DH and DH attorney has done the same to ex. We have one question to answer that we believe may in fact be the most important question that they have asked DH.

The question reads as follows..........  

Describe in detail why you believe you should be given primary physical care of your minor child, along with any and all evidence you have to support your belief.

Now some of you may be thinking that this is an easy question to answer. Dont get me wrong we have came up with some things that we want to include but I know there is more that we would want to include and we have a feeling that if we dont get it included we may regret it later on down the road.

Some points we want to make are:

Dh would be the parent to maximum and continuing relationship with both parents.

School issues that include the childs absentees in the past 3 years as well as the childrens attendance records of whom live with DH and I.

No drugs in or around our home. Drug and alchol charges in close immediate family of BM.

Child would get the help and encouragement needed at our home to succeed in school and get to grade level.

I know there is more that we want to put in here but we are drained at this moment answering all of these questions. If anyone has any advise or suggestions we would really appriciate the assistance.

I have seen on the web that there is a definition for The Best intrest of the Child for the state of Iowa and if anyone has that link and could pass it on to me that would help too!

Thank you all in advance!!


MyAngels4

Here is Iowa's Definition:
"Best interest of the child" includes, but is not limited to, the opportunity for maximum continuous physical and emotional contact possible with both parents, unless direct physical or significant emotional harm to the child may result from this contact. Refusal by one parent to provide this opportunity without just cause shall be considered harmful to the best interest of the child.

You can find it here under definitions.
http://www.legis.state.ia.us/IACODE/2003SUPPLEMENT/598/

I am going thru the same thing right now (19 Interrogatoies to answer), but I am the CP, and my ex is just trying to get custody of our son, but not our special needs daughter.
 
I would add stuff about the parenting skills that your Dh has over those of his ex. On the articles page there is a article titled "Competency with Basic Parenting Skills and Tasks"

HTH,
MyAngels4

Stepmom0418

Thank You!!

I have also seen an extensive list about the "best intrest of the child" that has a list of all things the courts in Iowa will consider in custody matters. (its a list that goes a b c and then lists a ton of things) Now I cant seem to find it at all! If anyone knows where i can find this list it sure would help alot!

Myangels4 if you dont mind me asking what area of Iowa are you in? I am in Polk Co and am looking for others that may have been involved with the same judges or lawyers and ect.

MyAngels4

I am in the same area. I have dealt with a few lawyers and judges with both my ex and with my hubby's ex.

Please PM me and I will try to help if I can.

My Angels4

Stepmom0418


MyAngels4


Stepmom0418


wendl

Sorry I am cracking up right now, did her attorney ask you really stupid questions too.


One of the questions they asked dh is:
How much alcohol do you and your spouse consume on a annual basis.

LMAO Hmmmm easy we each have ONE drink a year and usually on either a birthday or new years eve. The year they asked us this we hadn't even had ONE drink





Good luck with them, when does your trial start???

MyAngels4

I know what you mean about stupid questions, lol.

The ones I got asked me about my current and my past employment.
My ex knows that I havent worked since 1995. It is impossible to even think of working, especially when my daughter has a couple appointments a week with therapists. That and day care for 4 kids, and I wouldnt even make anything.

They also asked if I had denied my spouse visitation. Well, I live with him, so I dont know how I could have done that, lol.

MyAngels4

Stepmom0418

Hey Wendl

Actually the questions they asked DH were ALL about financial information other than the question I posted above and one that asks about criminal background on DH.

For the first 7 years DH and I were together I was the one who worked other than a few temp jobs he had. He really has no financial information and they asked NOTHING about me! They did not ask anything about me or my background, our kids or anything.

Now on the other hand since BM's mother was convicted recently on drug charges we asked her about drug and alcohol on her and her and anyone with whom SS has EVER lived!

Oh BTW BM called here the other night and uuummm well we would say she is getting a bit nervous or her attorney is.......one of the two. During the course of the conversation she admitted that SS didnt live with her for years and that her and her mom kept SS from DH. She also admitted that she is still living with BF.

Oh yeah and the funniest one is that "The reason she has denied DH a relationship for all these years is because it hurt her too much to see him with me!" ROFLMAO!!

She can sure come up with excusses! Oh and this is all on tape too!!