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Controlled Separation: Both staying at home?

Started by Ouroboros, Apr 22, 2009, 09:08:09 AM

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Ouroboros

We've been under the agreement that because of the school year, ending the end of May, my wife (who asked for the separation) and I live in the same house share the bed.  I assume this is to keep the status qup for the childern.  She will mostly likely ask me to leave during the summer after we have agreed upon the separation plan.  Of course the father should leave according to society.  Sought legal counsel and I am planning on fighting for the right to stay with my kids.  This will obviously come to head and could be ugly. 
Should I propose keeping the same arrangement of living together with a plan or stipulations and rules?  Is this effective in the end?  We have a detached garage with an apartment, should I propose that I move into that space?  It would be hard on the kids as far as understanding why I assume.

We are asking the marriage counselor we've used in the past to mediate the separation plan as she calls it.  I know the odds are stacked up against me.  Help!

shaden3

This is a very complicated situation, and it's clear you're concerned that "the odds are stacked against you." However, it may be best to seek out a professional mediator (not marriage counselor, attorney, therapist, etc.) because mediated agreements require a trained guide in these matters - not an advocate. There are many reasons for this, but do know that a marriage counselor tends to advocate, and you need someone who has no prior information about the two of you. You need to walk away knowing the process was balanced, unbiased, and that no odds were stacked in any one's favor.
Thou shalt not be a perpetrator. Thou shalt not be a victim. Above all, thou shalt not be a bystander.

Waylon

Suggested reading:

Divorcing But Still In The Same House - Essential Preparations
http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/samehouse.php


Does one of us have to move out of the house? If I move out, what happens?
http://www.deltabravo.net/faq/div_ans7.php
The trouble with reality is that there's no background music.