Kent,
Thank you for the reply. The DRC is a domestic relations commissioner, Kentucky uses these as a means of hearing the custody cases and them forwarding on a recommendation to the judge who will have the final say so and sign into order. 90% of the time the judge follows the DRC's recommendation. I met with my attorney today to see what my options were which were limited. 1)Do nothing - was not an option to me. 2) Negotiate a better visitation schedule by agreeing not to file an exceptions report - would put us in a visitation bargaining situation which visitation is easier to get fixed later, custody is not. 3) File an exceptions report, noting problems or errors in the DRC's recommendations. I chose number 3, as I feel it is in my daughters best interest to be with me the majority of the time. The negatives I mentioned were in good taste and only concerned parenting, nothing to do with our personal issues in the divorce. My ex wife has no job and only goes to school part time to become a nurse someday, a course she has failed out of before. I had previously put her through Phloebotomy school so she is a trained employable woman, but chooses not to work and is on various forms of govt assistance including housing and healthcare. She failed out the first time due to grades but also cited a failed pregnancy by another man, unbeknownst to me while we had first started dating. After seperating, she came home and played family with me and my daughter on several occasions, taking a family vacation with us in August 08' , and coming and staying with us as recently as January of this year. She also became pregnant after our seperation by another man in November of 08', with a subsequent abortion. During testimony she admitted to having men stay the night with my daughter present. I argued that this was confusing my daughter coming back and forth and playing family with different men. When her efforts at coming back home again failed the last time in January, partly in due to finding out about her most recent pregnancy, she made up charges on behalf of her and my daughter and filed an EPO which was later dismissed. During that time she drove down and made a scene at my daycare and took my daughter away during my time and kept her for over 3 weeks without me seeing her. We had been splitting time 50/50, only verbally agreed, but practiced for almost 9 months. She has a history of mental health and physical health issues that relate to some of her rash behaviors. She took my (at the time 2 yr old) daughter to a
psychologist without my knowledge or consent, at a place her mother works at, with concerns over some of the odd things my daughter had been saying. She kept her residence and multiple moves(3 residences in less than a year) a secret, as well as where my daughter stayed at times, and who my childs physician was up there. Only through efforts by my attorney were these found out, and my childs physician is scared to write any prescriptions because our inability to coordinate health care and concerns for double dosing. In contrast, I have worked very hard to keep the same environment for my daughter that me and my ex-wife picked out together. My daughter has the same home she has always known. My daughter has the same daycare she has always had, where all her friends go, where I actually went as a child myself. She has the same pediatrician she has always had, an excellent one that was there from day 1 in the hospital for her. I have a good solid job with a semi flexible schedule for making my childcare plan work as I am the one who makes the schedule at my place of employment. I take her to the park, to the museum, to Gattiland, paint her nails, doll her hair up better than any woman, keep her physically healthy and happy. She is very much a "daddys girl" in behavior and relationship, as testified to by my witnesses. In my exceptions report my lawyer and I filed today, we cited the overwhelming evidence showing that my daughter had a more suitable and stable environment at home than with her mother and how that evidence had been ignored with no showing of such an environment by the other side. Her side never even explained why they had a better environement for my daughter, in fact the DRC was rushing us through the hearing, seeming very frustrated to be there at all. My lawyer mention in the exception the "unwritten practice" of a female child going with a mother regardless of circumstances, and how it has been shown unconstitutional for decades now. Now I sit and wait to see if the judge will allow another non-evidentiary hearing to allow both (counsels only) sides to argue the exceptions cited. Odds are I will face an unwritten wall that many fathers faced before, and be forced into the court of appeals. Which from my understanding, the odds of getting something overturned become smaller the higher up you go as judges do not like to overturn other judges decisions. I am in between a rock and a hard place trying to figure out why the deciding factors for custody law are not really practiced and how to get them to just go by their own rules and give a father a fair shake? Most importantly, how to put a child where their best interests are served and they have the best possible chance at a happy healthy stable future?
Thanks..... DW - KY.
Also, do you know any groups that take on fathers rights issues in these types of situations??
